Johann

Too swag for my own good. into men. 21. I invented the tapioca anvil, the concept of hypothermia as a romantic idea, and left shoes

[gryffon]

[todaysbird]

getting northern licked by a northern flicker

[mfgbiggdog]

Why is it called a "clothes hamper"? What is a "hamper"?

[mfgbiggdog]

how do

https://www.wikihow.com/Video/Learn-to-Dougie

[mfgbiggdog]

Who was the first person to look at a horse and think

[mfgbiggdog]

One day, im gonna invent snow that shovels itself

[raywilliamjohnson]

It's been ten years since my Uncle Larry publicly humiliated me for drinking too much Sunny Delight. Pardon me for staying hydrated I guess

[mfgbiggdog]

They hate to see a motherfucker hydrating. Stay wet, king! ✊️

[mfgbiggdog]

I fuck with shrimp scampi

[raywilliamjohnson]

embalm me baby

[mfgbiggdog]

Give me my children back you demon

[mfgbiggdog]

Look at this fucking guy... Lazy as hell.

[mfgbiggdog]

It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

I forgot I made this account two years ago. Great way to remember the anniversary of my parents' divorce.

[mfgbiggdog]

I don't know who made this GIF, but it is the most important thing I've ever had happen to me.

I mean, just look at it! Look at him, go...

[coureirsix]

so alan wake is a crime novel writer who goes off on a vacation (in 2010) to a small northwestern american town with his wife and he ends up repeating the cycle of being an artist manipulated by a dark presence in a magic lake and because this lake is magic he tries to write himself out of it, resulting in fortnite (yes, that one) and dead by daylight canonically existing and he wrote a guy who'd pissed him off while on vacation into someone ELSE'S life and that's in Control (2019) and also Quantum Break (2016) is canon but also it's not because microsoft won't let remedy have the rights back and then in 2023, an FBI agent named saga anderson shows up to the SAME small northwestern town with her partner alex casey, who shares a name with the character that made alan wake famous in the first place and who is basically a stand in for max payne (grim and grouchy detective with the face of sam lake, voice of james mccaffrey) and

[mfgbiggdog]

I'm a whole new freak these days

[mfgbiggdog]

Sixty billion green peas in an avalanche that's about to kill you

[mfgbiggdog]

I am a machine that produces spite powered by pepsi zero

[wilwheaton]

[fuzzycricket]

If I got any gift from a crow I would keep it forever, I would affix these to the front door so they know I love and cherish them.

[mfgbiggdog]

Better than Picasso BTW

[mfgbiggdog]

Winter is my favorite season because of the dramatic inevitably in succumbing to hypothermia.

And cozy sweaters. Huge plus.