Mage Makintosh

they/them

[mg-makintosh]

i know romanticizing the past has always been a thing throughout human history but current teens heed my plea: you do NOT want to return to 2016.

[mg-makintosh]

pulls out my dick. this reminded me of you

[mg-makintosh]

im convinced that the people who name speech impediments are being assholes on purpose. a lisp is when you replace sounds (most commonly 's' with 'th'), a stutter has two of the most difficult consonants for people with stutters ('s' and 't'), a rhotacism is when you can't pronounce your 'r's. like what were they thinking

[homunculus-argument]

Between the nothingburger and the everything bagel, there is the somewhat sandwich.

[mg-makintosh]

i feel so bad for people who watch tv/movies/youtube or even listen to podcasts to learn English because we use *so much* slang that makes no fucking sense. like what the fuck does "the proof is in the pudding" even mean

[mg-makintosh]

usually im just watering the wine. you know just making up the weight. but when they can't see straight? that's when the fun really begins 😁

[flyin-shark]

I feel cheated. no one on Reddit told me that tumblr is a serotonin factory. Keep liking and reblogging my posts please thanks

[felixcloud6288]

Just don't fly too close to the sun.

[flyin-shark]

Throw me to the sun and I’ll get it pregnant

[strangehorse]

he understands the website your honour

[loveridden1999]

i may have my father's worst traits but i am more ethical & virtuous with them than him

[mg-makintosh]

crazy how magats are more concerned about trump possibly being gay than his name in the Epstein files/emails.

[mg-makintosh]

getting silly and taking showers is what human beings were made for.

[smashcut]

On the day of Dick Cheney’s death, I’m thinking about a lot of horrible consequences of his actions, but I’m also thinking about Lauren Hough telling Dick Cheney to waterboard her “if it makes him feel better” when she repaired his cable.

[deanwinchesterapologist]

went for a walk the other day and there were apples and blackberries growing along the trail and i walked past some teenagers smoking weed in a ditch and overheard one of them point to the fruits and say "bro that shit is bountiful"

[mx-capgras]

this will stay in my ask box forever. i have never enjoyed an ask so much as i have enjoyed this one

[mg-makintosh]

gender is a performance and im working the lights

[goth-queen]

[fangs-4-fags]

i wish i could blow up a customer

[violentoffender]

[redfagdiver]

I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna b