There’s so many things I wanna do with you… (Baekhyun’s diary)
notes: yearning baekhyun.
Yes baby. I’d do anything to have that split second of physical contact with you. You heard me. Why do I feel myself getting hot and my chest tightening every time you come up to me? I’ll purposely cover your hand in mine under the pretense of checking if the mango is ripe or not. I’ll forever be lost in your eyes especially when you’re talking about something you found so interesting off the internet. You’ll never know what goes through my mind when you do that. But baby, please go easy on my heart. Do you know how rude you are when you don’t greet me whenever you come to work in the morning? Especially when you sure know my eyes would follow you around whenever you come in. I’m gonna have to do something about that later. Bad mood, or good mood. Ok, I’ll say it. “Good morning! How are you today?”
You want a quick grocery run for your house today after work. Ok, is this even a question? Always. But will you hold my right hand when I drive you?
Summary: Baekhyun, newly established as your boyfriend, takes you out for your first official date as a couple. His goal is to make sure you never so much as look at another man again. You don’t know it yet, but you’re going to fall even harder and faster than you thought was possible. He will make sure of it.
Pairing: idol!baekhyun x fem!reader
Contents: 18+ minors DNI ⚠️ 🛑 DO NOT read these or the tags if you want to read this chapter unspoiled! couple-y things, sickeningly cute moments, oral (male and female receiving), saliva and other bodily fluids
Status: Ongoing
Author’s Note: 7.8k words! INDULGENCE! Yes… We deserve this after the few months that have passed by since my last upload. I hope everyone including Baekhyun can experience love and pleasure such as this. PS. originally this chapter was going to be much longer, but I’m saving the other half for next time. I hope you enjoy, and as always, please let me know what you think in the comments!
the song ~ Flamin’ Hot Lemon by Jaehyun
the playlist ❤️🔥🎧
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"How about this one? It's cute, right?" You walked over to the mirror and tried the cap on, turning to Baekhyun for approval.
"Umm," he pressed his lips together in a straight line, “I think we can find a better one. The color washes you out a bit.”
You turned back to the mirror, surveying your reflection to find that he was right. In your excitement of finding a cute design, you hadn't even considered the color complimenting your complexion. The orange of the stitching and hallabong fruit patch looked great with the taupe color of the hat, but the neutral tone did nothing for your skin.
"Yeah, I guess so. How about you pick one for me? Please, jagiya…" you said the last part with what you hoped would be an irresistible pout.
He looked around the shop, making sure no one was paying attending and stepped closer to whisper, "Of course, my pretty girl. Ask me for anything like that, and I'll do whatever you want."
"Whatever I want?", you replied, your mind flipping through various scenarios that were anything but innocent. His eyes crinkled into a smile above his mask.
"Eung, dangyeonhaji." Yes, of course. He squeezed your hand, giving you a knowing look, as if he could read your thoughts. Where the mask covered his face, your brain filled in the smirk that was undoubtedly present. It was a shame having to wear masks in public, but it was still too risky. You missed his face.
"Come on, I'll find you a good one!", he said as he grasped your hand and dragged you towards the door, making sure to thank the shop employee with a slight bow before exiting.
It was a gorgeous, bright morning- the clouds had almost dissipated from the last remnants of the storm that had rolled in the day before, and the autumn sun grew warmer by the minute. Although the day had started rainy and cold, the air was now fresh, clear, and briney with the scent of the sea - a perfect second-to-last day here on your island paradise with your perfect boyfriend. Boyfriend. He had confirmed it verbally, yet you still had trouble reconciling truth with fantasy. You squeezed his hand to reassure yourself he was not a figment of your imagination, and he squeezed back in answered reenforcement.
The day was young, but it felt like so much had happened already, which was understandable considering the early hour in which you had gotten up. You had achieved a lot since beginning the day with being healed by Baekhyun in the bathtub.
After the sweetest morning spent with him taking care of you (in so many ways), Baekhyun had had resumed the work of tying up loose ends he had started before dawn. This had left you with plenty of time to get ready for the day in an unhurried manner and pause for some reflection on the past few days. You had formed an emotional attachment to the old house with its earthly, grounding energy. The time-worn stone steps, the strong, polished wooden beams that had witnessed countless human moments over the years… these elements now held record of one of the most significant times in your life. Before getting ready for the day, you had made sure to take photos and videos of every inch of the house you could, focusing on the tiniest details so you would never forget it.
It had been so nice and cozy, staying in comfortable clothes while spending so many soft and sensual moments with him in the house as the rain pattered the roof and windows, but today it had felt good to dress in real clothes. Today, you had wanted to look your best. You hadn't felt pressured by him to look a certain way, but out of your own pride in this newfound relationship status, you had wanted to look the prettiest for your namchin. This was your first outing as a fully-fledged couple in public. No one would know it except the two of you, of course, but it felt important and significant.
He always looked so put-together, even in loosely-fitted clothes, and you had felt like you needed to dress a bit more stylish today, so you had chosen a simple, flattering silhouette, an outfit that would give you some confidence to walk beside him. You decided on your black ankle-length stovepipe denim jeans with a button fly, a fitted black mock-turtleneck, a tan, lightweight midi trench coat with wide lapels, and pristine white platform chuck taylor converse sneakers. A small cream colored cross-body purse felt like it fit the vibe just right.
Baekhyun's eyes lit up as you had walked into the kitchen fully dressed for your day out. He had covered his phone mic and mouthed "yeppeo" silently, smiling and nodding when you had pointed to yourself and said "na?" in response. His answering close-lipped smile and nod melted you a bit. He had far too much power over you with just a look of approval. The fact that you would do almost anything for his approval should have scared you, but it didn't.
You had done your hair and makeup as he'd finished his work, later joining you in getting ready once he had wrapped up his work for the day. He had changed into some slightly more subdued clothing than his typical look, not wanting to draw attention to himself with the usual brand name designer clothes he was used to wearing. He chose a simple black hooded zip sweater you swore you had seen him wear during some album promotions, his gold chrome hearts cross necklace, the straight-legged jeans and boots he had worn on the first night at the Flying Hog, and an understated black beanie (although if you looked closely, you would see the black embroidered Chanel logo. His ears were so recognizable, so it was no wonder he often wore knit hats that covered his ears when he wanted to blend in. A beautiful leather jacket finished the look off in perfect Baekhyun fashion. He looked fucking edible.
As you surveyed yourself in the floor length mirror after finishing your hair and makeup, he sidled up next to you, tilting his head in tandem with your own. He grasped your hand and smiled.
"Ready to go, beautiful?", he asked. He took your breath away.
You nodded and smiled at him in the reflection. "Yes, baby," you said as you turned towards him, reaching your hands up around his neck and pulling him closer. He responded instantly, wrapping his arms around your waist. He met your lips with a half-open kiss that ignited your insides, turning them into a swirling, fluttering energy. Your body melted forward, molding to his as the kiss went from sweet to needy, your heart rate increasing as his tongue brushed the tip of yours.
"If you keep kissing me like this, we won't get very far," you said and he chuckled in response.
He pulled back, smiling and biting his lip. "You started it. You can't expect me not to want my girlfriend every second of the day when you're looking this sexy. And you smell so good," he said as he pressed his nose to the spot behind your ear. It sent tingles down your arm and leg.
"Fuck, Baekhyun! Stop it or I'm going to devour you right here." The turtleneck and trench coat felt too hot. You wished he was undressing you. Didn't we fuck just hours ago? You had never had so much sex in such a short span of time, but now it was never enough.
"Stop what?", he asked. "This?" He grabbed your ass and kissed that special spot behind your ear, laughing at the way your legs gave out and you dangled from around his neck.
"Aghhh! Okay, okayyyy," he said, setting you upright and dragging you to the door. "But later? What was that word you used?"
"Devour?"
"Yeah. Devour. What does it mean?"
You giggled. "It means… uhh… like when you eat something, but very quickly and greedily."
"Hoho! Yes, ne gongjunim" he said with mischief glinting in his eyes. Yes, princess. "We can devour each other later." He adjusted his pants as he led the way to the car.
Today, Baekhyun had chosen to do the driving, giving you a chance to film some scenery for the vlog (still yet unnamed). The road leading to the north side of the island followed the coastline, revealing stunning ocean and mountain vistas, fields of canola that would turn bright yellow in the spring (you definitely wanted to come back to see them as well as the cherry blossoms), and you also got to take in the countless cafes, restaurants, shops, and homes that dotted the landscape along the way.
His hand never left your leg, which to you, was so hot as he steered the car with one hand. You felt claimed by him. Every feminist cell in your body protested as you entertained the thought of a possessive boyfriend Baekhyun. You bit your lip as he glanced at you, and you again wondered if he could read your mind because he smirked in that knowing way you had associated with him figuring out a game or puzzle, as if to say I own you.
The first stop of the day had landed you in Jeju City, experiencing a feeling of contentment you hadn't felt before as you spent the morning in the sunshine, just being with him. You felt the time ticking, aware of the fact that in just a few days you'd be back in your own time zone, thousands of miles away from him. But that was for future you to worry about. You tried your best to stow that nagging feeling away, determined to be present and soak up every detail of this perfect day with Baekhyun.
Right now, his soft, warm hand held yours and his rich, clean scent trailed from him, two of the five senses you could focus on to make this moment stick strongly and permanently in your memory. Oh, and here is a third one, you thought to yourself as you listened to him quietly humming to himself that same undetectable tune that had been stuck in his head for days.
You strolled past storefronts selling all sorts of things: coffee, stationery, bike rentals, seafood, and so many hallabong themed items that for the rest of your life, you would always associate this shade of orange with Jejudo.
Walking along the sidewalk of the coastal city, hand-in-hand with the man of your dreams felt surreal. You took every opportunity to look at yourself in the window reflections, delighted every time to see yourself with him. Haha! There's the fourth!, you said in your head. If only I could taste him right now.
Even with his hat, sunglasses, and mask on, you were hyper-aware of how Baekhyun stood out from other people around town. Maybe it was because you were so in tune with everything about him, but even his gait seemed so obvious, and it made you feel a little bit nervous as if at any moment someone would recognize him.
If you could be honest with yourself, you would say you looked good by his side. It was a bit scary though, imagining what people would say about you if someone were to take a photo and upload it online. People on the internet were viscious, soulless, and you wondered if your skin was thick enough to handle the discourse and scrutiny if you were to be found out.
You tried to tell yourself it didn't matter what people would say or think because he really wanted to be with you. You stuffed the nerves back down and focused on your insanely gorgeous boyfriend and all the ways you could enjoy the day with him. This was real… and now the sun was warming your skin as he walked beside you with that sexy strut you always found so devastatingly attractive. He always made sure to walk on the side closest to the road, switching sides and hands when necessary. His chivalry didn't go unnoticed by you. His parents really raised him right.
Suddenlty, a strong gust of wind whipped your hair around in all directions, and you hoped he would be able to pick out the perfect souvenir hat for you as soon as possible. As if on cue, the next shop you came upon was another gift shop.
"Yogi moja ga isseoyo." They have hats here. He pointed to the shop's display window bearing a large assortment of hats.
"Yeah! I think we will find one here!", you said as he held the door open for you.
The shop was filled to the brim with every type of souvenir that you could want. You put your mental blinders on and beelined for the hats, scanning them while Baekhyun selected the first one for you to try on. He pushed his sleeves back a bit, the veins in his hands and arms highlighted by the natural light coming down through the skylight above; in doing so, he had also revealed the golden and amber colored beads of the bracelet you had given him at the temple. The citrine bracelet. Your heart nearly burst out of your chest at the sight of the circle of beads catching the light and glowing brightly on his slender wrist. It was a simple gesture, wearing the accessory you had given him, when he had so many other beautiful pieces of jewelry to choose from. The significance wasn't lost on you.
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"You wore it," you said. Your hand reached up to touch the bracelet as he picked a hat for you to try on.
"Ne… ottaeyo?" Yes. What do you think? He could tell you were touched at the surprise, having hidden the bracelet beneath his sleeve throughout the morning.
"It looks so good on you," you said. "Do you really like it?"
It was an interesting dynamic. Sometimes he forgot that first and foremost you started as a fan. There was still a disconnect between both sides of you. The fan, and his Y/N. He knew you had been invested in him and the group for years, and he knew you had held yourself back from completely freaking out in front of him, but in moments like this, where you couldn't quite believe he would "humble himself", it made him remember how much this must mean for you. And this was all besides the fact that he really did love the bracelet. The smooth beads felt good against his skin. It contained the essence of you and all of your positive energy, like a talisman. A gift from your heart.
"I love it, pretty! It's my good luck charm. And when I wear it, you'll always be with me. I feel protected," he said, smiling because it was true.
You nodded and took the hat he held forward in his other hand. "I'm so glad you like it," you said, but your eyes told him so much more. Your sincerity caught him off guard at times. Even the small things held meaning for you.
You placed it on your head, swiveling your head back and forth to see it from different angles in the mirror. It was a nice-looking hat. Navy blue with orange embroidered university style block letters spelling out JEJU on the front.
"How did you know?", you said, turning to him smiling and holding the bill cutely between your thumb and index finger. So cute. "I love it."
"Yeah, it's perfect," he said. "Give it to me. I'll buy it for you!
"Really? Thank you baby! That's so sweet," you said.
"Just wait over there, okay?" He gestured towards the door of the shop. He hoped he didn't sound too bossy, but he had to be careful.
"Okay, I'll go look at the stationery by the door," you said. Your eye contact told him you understood.
He walked up and handed the hat to the cashier, a woman in her late thirties to early forties.
"Just the hat then?", she said, not looking up until she had rung up the hat. Did she do a double take, or was that his imagination? He was wearing his mask, but tugged his beanie lower out of nervous habit.
"Yes. No bag, thanks." He handed her some cash and said, "Keep the change, thank you," as she handed the hat back. He couldn't tell if she recognized him or not.
He swiftly walked away and guided you out the door before you had a chance to say anything.
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He grabbed your hand and pulled you along silently, his grip a bit tighter than usual.
"Everything alright, baby?", you asked as he led you onto a side street.
"Yeah, everything is fine! Here," he said as he ripped the tag off the hat and placed it on your head. "Hehe… So cute!"
The tension you had felt seconds ago dissipated as his eyes smiled above the mask. What was that all about? Your intuition must have been off today.
"Thank you! The wind was driving me crazy," you said as he straightened the bill and tucked some hair behind your ears, his eyes glancing so briefly over your shoulder that you might have imagined it.
"Okay, pretty! Where are we going next?"
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Dotoree Kitchen specialized in a dish called cheongchon soba- a refreshing, tangy broth with chewy soba noodles and topped with green tangerines. It sounded unusual and this was probably the dish you were most looking forward to trying on this trip.
It came as no surprise to you that you really enjoyed it, but you were surprised at how much Baekhyun liked it. He kept commenting on how different the flavor was, yet he kept tasting it and finally decided that he really enjoyed it.
"With me, you'll never experience a boring meal. I want to introduce you to so many foods that I love, baby!"
"Okay, pretty. I'll let you pick the restaurants from now on," he said. His eyes scanned the area near the door as more guests entered the restaurant. It had started out pretty empty, but was filling up quickly now that it was lunchtime. He slipped his mask back over his face.
"That was so good. I feel very… light?"
"Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm full, but I don't feel like I need a nap."
"Mmm," he agreed, his eyes darting around, no doubt scanning for prying eyes.
"Let's go pay and get out of here." Now you were sure you didn't imagine his nervousness earlier.
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The next stop was a coffee shop you had saved in your tab for Jeju City. It was a tiny, magical coffee shop tucked inside another Hanok, and this one coincidentally reminded you of the entrance to Cimer Club with its stone path entrance and greenery growing everywhere, even inside the cafe. You could hardly contain the squeal wanting to escape your throat as you spotted a calico cat sleeping in a tree in the courtyard entryway.
Maeumeon was a dessert cafe, but as you were still full from lunch, you kept the order light and not too filling. Thankfully this spot was quiet and run by an older gentleman, the odds of him recognizing Baekhyun were far less than at the previous spot.
He chose a cozy table in the corner of the adjacent room, offering even more privacy in case more people entered the cafe. You could tell he felt much more at ease here. As you placed the tray on the table and sat down, he removed his mask completely and sighed contently.
"This place is so cute! I could live here," you said as you took your coat off and hung it on the back of the chair. You pushed your sleeves up your wrists, handed Baekhyun his iced Americano, and reached for your drink, taking a long sip through the straw. The iced ginger latte was cold in your mouth, but its spiciness warmed your throat on the way down. You took a bite of the sticky rice cake, a traditional Korean dessert, and it paired perfectly with the drink. Not too sweet, but perfectly chewy. You continued in this fashion, lost in a dreamy culinary experience as you took another sip, another bite, another sip.
Baekhyun stared at you, not saying a word but he bit down on his thumb and it remained between his perfect white teeth as you took in the setting of the cafe, enjoying the food and the drink and his presence. There was soft music coming from somewhere. He had a far-off look in his eyes, squinting ever so slightly as if studying you, or maybe he was disassociating. Maybe he was tired from being up since before dawn. You couldn't figure it out.
His eyes bored into you as he shifted, took a sip of coffee, and sucked his lower lip into his mouth as he blinked slowly. You were beginning to feel self-conscious.
"What? Do I have something on my face?", you asked. His eyes snapped into focus and he smiled softly. He crossed his legs and arms as he leaned back as he looked you up and down.
"You are beautiful. So, so beautiful, Y/N."
That wasn't what you expected, and it made the butterflies swirl up into a vortex in your belly.
"Not as beautiful as the person I'm looking at," you replied.
"No, I don't think you understand how attractive you are." His foot nudged yours under the table. "Like right now, all I can think about is that kiss from earlier. And how sexy you look in that top." His smile was disarming. "I want to devour you right here on this table."
You squeezed your legs tightly together as you thought about those lips and mouth at your core, devouring you. A flush rose up your neck and into your cheeks. The collar of your turtleneck felt tight and suffocating as your body reacted to his words, so predictable now that it was embarrassing. Your breath rose and fell as your gaze remained locked on his. He chewed on his lip and swallowed, a smirk ever present on his face.
"I—," you cleared your throat, "What brought this on all of a sudden? I mean…" You had unconsciously gathered your hair up off your neck. The cafe was so warm and your cheeks were burning. The ginger in your drink was not helping either as heat bloomed in your belly. You could feel moisture along your spine, the tight fabric not helping to cool you in the slightest. You leaned in and whispered, "I would love nothing more, but we are so far from the house."
He looked around before finding your knee under the table. His fingers slid halfway up your thigh and tickled the sensitive skin there. He was enjoying watching you squirm. His devious look gave it away. He was toying with his prey, and you were happily caught in his trap.
"Did you know," he said as he leaned closer and wrapped his plump lips around the straw to take a sip, "Aewol is known for being a remote part of the island. It's mostly farmland and nature parks. I bet there are many places that are hidden from the public. And it's on the way back to the house."
"Is that so?"
He clamped down on the straw and bared his teeth in a wickedly beautiful grin.
"Mmmm!", he confirmed as he swallowed more coffee. "I would have thought in all your research about Jeju, you'd know this."
"Well, I mostly focused on landmarks and cafes, not places where a single female traveler could possibly get kidnapped," you scoffed playfully. Was he suggesting…
"My baby is not only beautiful, she is very smart and wise." His approval warmed your insides, and being called my baby made your legs clench together again. "Now that I'm here with you and you're not alone, would you like to explore a little bit? I think it would be fun," he added, breaking eye contact for the first time in a while and grazing your knee with his thumb. He looked up at you through his lashes, but his expression was more wolf-like than his usual puppy demeanor. There was hunger and want there, and you wondered if your eyes told the same story.
"I think that's a great idea," you said. You could read between the lines.
He nodded and stood up, offering a hand to help you rise to your feet. You quickly bused the table as he pushed the chairs in, waved goodbye to the man behind the counter, and made a swift exit.
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Baekhyun followed the route the maps app suggested along a tree-lined road to an unknown location. His mind was frenzied, and he was growing impatient. He had been driving for at least forty minutes. He stretched his hand across your thigh and his pinky finger came in contact with the place he was desperate to taste again. He dragged his fingernail across the denim and you made a small, whimper-ish sound. Apparently your nerves were lit up because the tiniest touches were getting you worked up. Electricity sparked in his body as he relished in the powerful feeling of giving his woman pleasure. It was his main objective as he searched the landscape for a spot to pull over. He hadn't seen any cars in about ten minutes, which bode well.
You were circling your hips now, chasing the contact of his one finger through your jeans.
Hold on, pretty. Just a little while longer and I will make you feel so good.
His eyes caught something and he slammed on the brakes, causing you to jolt forward as his arm reflexively flew to catch you and press you back to your seat.
"Sorry, I just noticed…" His arm rested on your seat back and he looked over his shoulder, reversing the car about twenty feet.
You looked to your right and saw what he was talking about.
"I would have never seen that road. Good job, baby!" You smiled at him, surprise and awe on your pretty face.
"Let's go," he said excitedly. He hoped it would be as deserted as it appeared from the road.
The trees here felt ancient and the sunlight had a harder time filtering through the dense canopy of trees above the road, almost forming a tunnel. In the summer, when the leaves were at their most dense, it would probably be even darker. This is promising.
The tree-tunnel opened upon a barren field with weeds now covering what should have been a crop of rice or soybeans. The car passed a dilapidated barn and some other structures that were in various stages of decay. There were corrals, but no animals on this property which he assumed was a deserted farm. He pulled the car down the gravel road that led around behind the barn into a small space between some trees. It was perfect.
You took your seatbelt off, the trench coat you had held in your lap now hung neatly on the back of your seat.
"This is a side of Jeju I never thought I'd get to see," you said. You leaned closer and caressed his neck, your thumb stroking his earlobe. "Thanks for bringing me on this excursion." He loved how you would play along with him. Searching for a hidden place to fuck was so much more amusing with your sense of humor.
Your eyes… your beautiful eyes sparkled and your lips called to him. He looked down at the shirt that had been taunting him since he first saw you wearing it in the kitchen. The fabric clung to your shape. He couldnt wait to get you out of it.
FUCK, she is so pretty. And she's all mine.
He giggled and pulled you forward, finally crashing his lips into yours and everything felt right again. Your plush lips parted, accepting his tongue into your mouth with a little moan. His favorite sound. No, actually he would be hearing his most favorite sound soon. He would be the one to bring it out of you.
His arms encircled you and drew you close, but not close enough. He pulled back, took his hat and jacket off as quickly as he could, and returned hastily. Your kisses were growing needier and messier, and now his hands were in your hair and your fingers pulled his hair, and it was a tangled mess of sighs and moans as the air in the car got hotter.
"Back seat?", you said breathlessly.
"Yeah."
He let you climb back first, noting how great your ass looked in those jeans. He followed, awkwardly folding his limbs this way and that to fit through the space between the seats. You were both giggling at the ridiculous sight of a grown man squeezing himself to fit, and then he crashed into the middle seat with a final twist. He moved one leg so that each foot was on either side of the center console, tucked under the front seats.
You quickly crawled onto his lap and straddled him, your hips immediately grinding down on his dick, and for the first time today, he groaned.
"Baby, I want you," you said. You sounded desperate for him and it made his heart ache.
"I want you too, pretty. So much." Your arms were around his shoulders and your head rested on him as you took your pleasure, rocking your hips into him. "Does that feel good, jagiya?"He loved how horny you'd get for him, worked up and out of your mind, and how he could increase your pleasure just by saying the right thing at the right time.
His fingers hooked under the hem of your shirt and pulled upward, his fingers feeling the smooth skin of your back and unhooking your bra with one hand. He pushed you back and lifting the shirt higher, he pushed your bra out of the way to latch on to one gorgeous nipple while massaging the other.
"Fuck, baby," you said between heavy breaths. Your hips never stopped moving and his dick strained against his jeans, begging to be released, but he would wait. He had more important things to tend to. Such as getting your pants off so he could taste the flavor he most craved.
His fingers toyed with the top button of your fly and once he unfastened it, he grabbed both sides and pulled them open to reveal that soft and tender bit of skin, the lowest part of your belly that drove him absolutely insane. His thumb dipped down below your fly, under your panties to find you an already soaked mess.
"Unghhh," you moaned as his thumb easily found your clit and gently circled like he knew you needed to be touched there.
"Fuck, yes just like that," you said. He took your nipple back into his mouth, his lips sliding across the little bumps on your areola while his tongue flickered across the taut bud in the center. Your fingers felt incredible as they massaged and lightly scratched his scalp. Your little body twitches and cries were so satisfying to him... Those cues he listened for as he brought you to the brink of climax… it was building now, but he needed more. He needed you to lose yourself, and he wanted you to use him to get there.
"Jagiiii," he said, his voice coming out in a rasp. "Nae olgulre anja."
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You stared at him for a few seconds before his words registered. You weren't even sure if you heard him correctly. Did he just ask you to sit on his face?
"Please." His smile was a weapon you were powerless against.
"You want me to… sit on—"
"My face? Yeah, don't you want to?" His eyes went puppy-mode for a moment, and it made your heart leap. Riding Baekhyun's beautiful face had only ever been a deep, dark fantasy. It was even more tantalizing now that he was your boyfriend, and asking so sweetly. Another first.
"Help me out of my pants," you said as you used the seat backs to lift your body up, looking out the windows to make sure you were still alone on this abandoned piece of property.
He hooked his fingers around your jeans and underwear and tugged at each side to ease them off your hips as you awkwardly kicked your shoes off.
"Baby, you're so beautiful," he said as if this was the first time he was seeing your naked body. He squeezed the soft flesh of your hips and thighs with his long fingers as if finally possessing a long sought-after object. He then turned and shifted to the side to lay down across the back seat, removing his sweater and balling it up behind his head as a makeshift pillow.
"Come here, my goddess," he said as he admired your body from below.
You did your best to carefully straddle his head, laughing at the awkward posture you were in, and as he adjusted his arms to make your legs fit in any way that worked, you half-sat on his shoulders, painfully aware of the weight you added to his chest.
"It's okay, pretty. I'm fine!", he as he pulled you fully down on him by the hips.
"Are you sure? I don't want to hurt or suffocate you."
"I promise. If I need air, I'll let you know, okay?"
You nodded and inched forward a little more, unsure of how high you needed to raise yourself to be at a good position for his mouth.
"Don't think too much… just sit on my face, please. I'm going crazy," he said as he caressed one of your nipples and smiled when you responded with a sigh. It was too good. His touch was heaven on earth.
Some of your wetness had already leaked onto his chest and neck, glistening on that freckle between his collarbones you loved so much . He scooted further down, his legs fully bent on the seat as he pushed you closer to his face and helped you position yourself right at his mouth. You grabbed the headrest for balance and his hands forced you up against his face. His tongue flicked out, sliding and finding your clit with deft precision. Your eyes snapped shut with the sudden pleasure searing through your nervous system. You began rocking your hips back and forth, sliding yourself across his tongue, using the leverage your arms provided to help you match his movements, while keeping some of your body weight off his neck and chin.
"Mmmph," was all he could say beneath you, but it was a reassuring, positive sound. He was enjoying himself and could breathe just fine. Your hesitation dissolved into pure bliss as he sucked on your clit, flattened his tongue and moved side to side, and you even felt his teeth graze your outer folds at some point. Your moans and gasps and occasional swear words were more than enough confirmation that he was a certified, world-class eater.
He moved his tongue down to your entrance and pressed you against his face again, his tongue fucking into you and his nose hitting your clit just right. You found a rhythm that was so good, you could probably come in less than a minute, but when it got too good, you would slow down, edging yourself on his beautiful mouth.
You reached back, suddenly aware of his neglected cock. He was already so hard, the poor thing. You did your best with one hand to unbutton, unzip and free him from the confines of his jeans and underwear. It sprang to life from its fabric prison and your fingers stroked the baby smooth skin, spread the pearl of pre-cum around the head, and stroked him at the same pace in which you were moving against his face.
"Mmmmm," he moaned, the sound muffled by your body writhing against him.
"Does that feel good, my angel?" You spat in your palm and tightened your grasp on him as he got even harder.
"Mmhmmmm."
His hips rose and fell, fucking into your hand, making you wish he was fucking you. But his tongue felt too good just now. You grabbed a fistful of his hair and fucked his face harder as he looked up at you with that piercing gaze. His fingers dug deeper into your flesh, pushing you harder against his mouth as your legs began to twitch and your stomach tightened into that familiar knot. Your eyes closed and your head fell back as you writhed above him, the grip on his hair holding him in place against your sensitive clit, completely at your command. The sexual power felt absolutely intoxicating.
You looked down and he was wincing.
"Oh my god I'm so sorry, baby!", you said and sat back on his chest, horrified that you potentially hurt him.
"It's okay," he said, smiling. "You pulled my hair a little hard."
"No, baby I'm so sorry! I got a little carried away," you said.
"It's okay, pretty! I liked it. Come back," he said as he pushed you toward his face again.
"FUCK!!" you shouted as he sucked your clit back into his mouth and shook it back and forth like a puppy with a toy. His growl came from deep in his chest as your hand found his cock again. You resumed fucking his mouth and closed your eyes once more, holding onto the back of the seat this time to balance your weight just right.
"Fuck, yes, just like that baby. Yes yes yes yes," you heard yourself say in a high pitched whining voice that surely couldn't belong to you.
You abandoned the hand job as stars began popping in your vision behind closed eyes— all you could concentrate on now was his tongue and a the steady pace he used to bring you to your climax.
"Oh, fuck," you said through clenched teeth as your hips waved and swirled in circles. "Oh god," you moaned as the ripples of pleasure tingled down to your toes.
"Mmhmmm," he mumbled. It was the sound of approval and encouragement as the orgasm hit you in waves. Even when he couldn't speak, he still managed to find a way to praise you. You felt like a sex goddess as he watched you cumming on his tongue.
Your hips continued to undulate as your core clenched and you dragged your self across his slippery mouth, riding it out until you couldn't anymore. You wanted to cry because it was so good.
"Ah," you whined, your legs convulsing and twitching, your clit overstimulated by his still-flickering tongue as you came down. You pulled back and rested lightly on his heaving chest to reveal his soaked face. He opened and closed his jaw in circles as if working tension out. But he still smiled, and his eyes shone brightly as you caught your breath.
"Are you okay," you asked, concerned that you had put too much weight on his jaw for too long.
"It's a little sore, but it was worth it," he giggled. "Do you know how fucking sexy you are?" He sat up against the window as you carefully lifted yourself off his shoulders and scooted back. He pulled you back between his legs and you rested against him, your hand reaching for his neck which was wet and slippery.
"I think I made a mess of you, my angel," you said as you noticed how much had run down the sides of his neck. You used the inside of your coat to dab and wipe at the layer of saliva and your wetness that clung to his neck and face.
"I love how wet you get for me. It turns me on so much. My little bunsu," he giggled.
"Bunsu?
"Fountain," he laughed and kissed you before you had a chance to get embarrassed. He tasted like sex.
"Okay, but I think I can turn you into a fountain too, baby." You turned and began to pull his boots off.
"No, pretty. It's okay, I can wait—"
"Please let me. You deserve it," you smiled as you tugged at his waistband. His cock stood at attention, waiting to be touched, kissed, adored, and you were suddenly salivating, hungry and eager to have him in your mouth.
After the not so easy job of removing his jeans and underwear, he bent his legs so that one foot rested on the seat and the other in the foot well. You pushed his legs further back and open and began a loving descent of kisses and licks from his knee, to his inner thighs, to the junction of his hips. His fingers caressed your hair, your neck, your cheek as you lavished adoration upon his body.
Your hand grasped his cock and it throbbed as you did the same to the other thigh. As you glanced up at him, you caught the look. The squinting, slack-jawed look of utter bliss on his face. You decided right then that you would unleash yourself and give him the best blowjob of his life. He thought he knew how freaked out you were for him, but he had only had a taste of what you wanted to do.
You kissed the head of his cock tenderly, making sure to wet your lips and drag them across the sensitive skin right below it. More clear liquid collected at the tip, and you used your swollen lips to spread it across the spongy skin before wrapping your lips around him and sinking down… his sharp intake of breath was music to your ears. You sucked and glided your lips over him a few times, agonizingly slow to tease him a bit. He breathed in sharply again as you took all you could into your mouth, trying to get your lips to the base. Your throat relaxed a bit more with each pass of your lips over his shaft, and his answering moans encouraged you to try even harder.
Your fingers massaged his balls and instinctively pulled gently on the sensitive skin of his sack, eliciting a string of curses from his lips. Good. Very good. You chose to listen to your instincts more as you tried to ignite new zones of pleasure for him.
"Baby, you're so good, ahhhhhh," he said as you bobbed up and down faster, adding your other hand to chase your lips and stroke him. "Fuck."
He gathered your hair up again like he had done before, gripping your hair in a ponytail and using it to add a little bit of guidance to the speed of your stroking and sucking. You watched the triangular bit of skin above his pubic bone flex, rising and falling irregularly as his breath came in short bursts and gasps. His hips began to thrust upward to meet your mouth, and with his body cues you wrapped your arms under his ass and gripped his hips where his thighs connected. Your lips touched the base of his dick now, and you were so proud of yourself, you could cry. You took deep breaths as often as you could, willing your gag reflex to stay away.
"Nol jom bwa , jagiya. Neo jongmal jalhae. Neo…mu…joa," he moaned. Look at you, honey. You're so good. It feels. So. Good.
His soft praises were all you needed to continue even though your eyes began to water and your jaw was growing tired. You would push through it for him.
His breath grew more ragged and his balls tightened as you pressed a hand to the skin around the base of his cock for leverage.
"Fuck, baby…" he said as you increased your speed.
"I'm so close, pretty," he said and tried to get you to sit up, but you had already decided you wanted to let him cum in your mouth. You were a bit scared because you had never let anyone do it before due to your strong gag reflex. But it was him. And you wanted to do it for him. You would do all you could to avoid gagging. Your heart was pounding and tears streamed down your cheeks as you looked him in the eyes, trying to communicate that you wanted this.
"Y/n, I can't stop… Are you sure?" Poor Baekhyun was holding back with all his might.
"Mmhm!", you said and held a thumb up to make it even more obvious. He was good to go.
His eyebrows knitted together and jaw dropped open as he nodded and rolled his hips, thrusting up into your mouth. His orgasm face was so very beautiful and you watched with rapt attention as warm, sticky fluid painted your mouth. His cock throbbed as he spilled himself in spurts… he grunted and panted and moaned his way through it.
Just breathe. You're okay. Swallow now.
You felt it coat your throat, the taste not altogether unpleasant, just… unusual. Your mouth and throat felt oddly numb and slightly itchy, but other than that, not bad. You swallowed again, willing yourself to take deep breaths in between his ebbing thrusts.
"Ahhh, jjorosso," he panted. Ahhh, it was amazing. "Baby." He laid back against the window with is eyes shut tight, breathing hard. Then he began to laugh. An amused, satisfied laugh. "Jongmal michosso!" That was crazy!
"Really?" You asked, but you knew the truth. It was a masterful blowjob if you did say so yourself.
"Come here, pretty." He pulled you in for a kiss."That was the best. It felt so amazing, but… Is your mouth sore?"
“A little, but that’s nothing. It is strange, though… does cum have a numbing effect?”
“I don’t know, I’ve never tried swallowing it,” he giggled.
“Well, that was my first time and it feels so strange. Not bad! Just—“
“Baby, I hope you didn’t feel like you had to do that. I would never expect,” he said. Why was he so sweet?
"I know, but I wanted to. I really enjoyed it. Especially the look on your face when you realized what was happening." You laughed internally at the thought of Baekhyun's DNA in your stomach.
He held your cheeks, surveying your face before kissing you again. "Thank you. That was insanely hot."
"Thank YOU. Fucking your face was also insanely hot. I want to do all of that again," you said, nuzzling his nose with yours and kissing him softly.
He nodded and wiped at the smeared mascara at the outer corner of your eye. "We will definitely be doing this again. Maybe at the same time? I promise." You both laughed and he held up a pinky which you immediately linked yours onto. Another kiss. You would never tire of this. "Let's get cleaned up, and then we can go get something yummy to eat, okay? I'm so hungry!"
cw & tags: 1,7k words | fluff, pwp, smut | heavy on smoking!! drug usage, shotgunning, spit kink, making out, dryhumping, spanking, labia play, oral sex f!receiving, dirty talking, cursing, fingering, overstimulation, dacryphilia, dom & sub undertones, petnames, cum play, cum eating, squirting.
synopsis: you obviously knew how different baekhyun would be compared to your previous lover, but his lighthearted demeanor paired with your new, unlabeled relationship made it so fun to just smoke, mess around, and find out how just much you were missing out.
author's notes: hi angels!! welcome to my first little drabble of the year ♡ i'm glad to be back with an idea that ocurred to me after that seeing that video, mixed in with amazing requests over my inbox. thank you for waiting! i hope this fits what you have envisioned, since i'm really happy with the end result.
DISCLAIMER | PLEASE READ!!! : this is an obvious work of fiction made by a fan for other fans, and is in no way, shape, or form, intended to defame, demean, or degrade baekhyun and/or violate his privacy, nor engage in any attempts to do so. thank you.
if you were to rate baekhyun against all your other friends when it came to smoking and chilling, he most definitely was your favorite. maybe you were a bit biased, because ever since you broke up with your previous boyfriend, the lines of your friendship with baekhyun have blurred completely. it all started with a few handsy hugs the day you two met after an exhausting break up, and before you knew it, you'd developed a light, freeing, unlabeled relationship with a guy that understood you way more than you realized.
you digressed, since you haven't had this much fun in a while, and your boyfriend never really liked smoking with you, so having sex while being high was completely out of the picture. but with baekhyun on the other hand? the guy was a stoner. and you thought that in the most flattering way.
you giggled when his left hand slipped down your body to grab your ass through your clothes, his lips separating from yours to take another drag from the joint, grinning mischievously.
"gimme." you said, hands caressing both of his cheeks before he parted his lips to blow the smoke into your mouth. you inhaled it with a hum, kissing him again, helping with his pants since his hand was busy with the blunt. he breathed out in arousal, letting his spit drop into your mouth with a grin when you instantly swallowed it.
baekhyun groaned when you cupped him tightly through his boxers, his already hard cock jumping out when you pulled the clothing down to his thighs. you ground against him, taking a drag yourself of the same joint.
the smoke burned through your lungs in that delicious, familiar manner that made you relax, and at the same time want to fuck. baekhyun pulled your leggings down, hissing when he felt your wetness.
as much as you two explored each other's bodies through touching and making out, there were some things that baekhyun wanted to try with you. who was he kidding, he wanted to do everything with you. he couldn't even picture not being obsessed with you. your sounds and your body when it trembled because of his fingers or his cock.
"babe..." he whispered in your neck, watching you unfold lazily with his digits languidly circling your heat. "as much as i wanna get on with fucking you, there's something i've been wanting to do for a while."
you lean back on his lap to look at his face, gasping when he rolled your bodies. you glared at him when you almost dropped the joint on the couch, but his stare at you made your protests die before even coming out. "what is it?" you murmured, taking another drag.
he smiled, kissing down your body, stopping just before your center, which made you freeze. "wait, what are you doing?" you asked, a little surprised.
"what does it look like i'm doing? i wanna eat you out." he shrugged pushing your panties aside to tease your folds, groaning again when feeling your slick. "been thinking about it for so fucking long, too."
you shivered, swallowing dry when you thought about it. your previous sexual experiences with your last boyfriend already felt underwhelming compared to the tension you shared with baekhyun, but thinking about it, letting him go down on you made you feel vulnerable. you could already picture it feeling weird, and maybe not satisfying at all.
"you're hesitating about something. tell me." baekhyun stopped, tilting his head to read your cues. "you don't want me to go further, angel?"
you widened your eyes, your overthinking fading to hold his hand on your inner thigh. "n-no, i want this. i do, it's just—" you felt silly, but spoke out anyway. "can we just move to the actual sex....?"
baekhyun frowned, confused, but smiling. "love, this is sex. is it something to do with me eating you out?" he asked gently, caressing you.
you didn't like mentioning your ex to him, since he already had an ick about the guy, but you felt there was no way to omit this. "i... don't like it. my ex already tried it once and it's just... not for me baekhyun. i just don't think it's something i'd enjoy with anyone at this point." you looked away, slightly embarrassed.
baekhyun's shoulders briefly slumped, his lips pursing into a pout as he looked between your legs again. "oh, angel... i'm sorry you feel that way." he sighed, thinking about how he could speak his mind, "but i honestly think your ex was just a fucking mutt."
your eyes widened, snorting slightly from the word he used. "a what?" you smiled, watching him squeeze your thigh.
"what kind of boyfriend is so useless he can't even make you feel good with his mouth?" he looked at you again. "baby, i swear i don't mean to be an arrogant prick, but if it were me... you definitely wouldn't think like that."
you chuckled, flicking your tongue with a grin. "oh, is that so?" you challenged, wondering how far he'd take that claim. it made you want to let him prove himself right, especially after smoking. "you want to please me with your mouth that bad?"
baekhyun chuckled, shaking his head, stealing your blunt to take the last drag and blow smoke rings onto your cunt in a way that made you even wetter. "angel, i want to make you squirt on my face." he murmured, sniffing your pussy as his hand extended to extinguish the joint in the ashtray.
you gasped when his tongue traced your outer labia all the way up to your clit. somehow, seeing baekhyun in this position made you extremely sensitive, your brows furrowing when he grinned confidently. he didn't boast any longer, though, removing your panties completely in a rough tug to be able to spread your thighs apart. "tell me everything that feels good." he hummed.
his fingers joined in into a gentle, exploring touch, his eyes fixed on your face to pay attention to every single reaction. "fuck, you taste so sweet." his voice was husky, his praise giving you tingles.
whenever he noticed a twitch on your leg, a hitch on your breath, or a clench on your grip on his shoulder, he tried to replicate it through controlled suckling and licking. "a-ah, what—!" you stammered, blinking while quickly trying to make sense of what you were feeling.
he made out with your cunt in a languid manner, humming repeatedly, eyes closing every now and then as if savoring your taste with reverence. it was definitely unlike anything you've ever felt before, something that made your hips buck forth into his face involuntarily.
"yeah, baby? what is it, hm?" baekhyun asked lowly, squeezing your folds, sucking on your clit in a teasing manner. his fingers pushed into your cunt finally, making you jolt, your eyes widening. "just like that, angel. come on. tell me if you like it." he whispered, scissoring you, flattening his tongue on your swollen bud.
"i-i—!" you voiced, panting loudly, chest heaving when his speed quickened on you, parting your fold to press inside, licking your pussy. "yes! yes, i l-like it!" you shouted, coiling tight on the couch, the pleasure mixing in with your high.
"good fucking girl." he chuckled, fingering you with a noticeable squelch, basking into your moans. he pulled his fingers away to slap your heat, then dove in with his mouth, pressing his nose on you with a filthy look in his face. "hmph—!" he groaned, pushing your hips down with a tight grip that would surely bruise.
your eyes rolled to the back of your head, seeing white in your vision when he pushed his digits back inside, the veins of his arm popping out to essentially fuck you with three fingers at once. you words were already incomprehensible, the corners of your eyes stinging in irony from being proved wrong. this is what it was supposed to feel like, and baekhyun was the one to show it to you.
he spanked the back of your thighb as flicked his tongue again, and again on your clit, eyes dark and focused on you. "you sound so fucking beautiful. you're clamping down on my fingers, angel." he curled the tips of his digits, rubbing your sweet spot. "i can feel your orgasm. c'mon. give it to me now." his voice echoed, barely registering in your stunned mind.
you trembled, body convulsing as the high fast approached, stealing your breath in a silent scream, gushing on his face in a way that you've never done before. your vision blurred for a moment, before focusing on his awed expression while licking you clean, feeling sure that this man was a fiend.
he hummed a few more times, slurping erotically on your juices with care, stretching your ecstasy for longer to ensure your satisfaction, before pulling away with ragged breathing. "holy shit, baby." he smiled. "i guess you really needed that, huh?" he cooed, enjoying how long it took for you to finally speak.
"you—" you panted, "you're fucking insane." you spoke, weakly, looking down at yourself with a disbelieving grin.
"that's good, right? that felt good to you, right?" baekhyun asked with sudden wide eyes, blushing, almost as if he felt embarrassed for eating you out so passionately.
you blinked, then huffed, pulling him up for a kiss, shutting him up in the best way possible. he melted against you, letting out a choked groan when you wrapped your hand around his neglected cock. "yes. yes, it felt good. you're so good to me." you hummed, stroking him in a disarming way, making him whine like a puppy.
he grinned lazily, still a bit stoned, pushing his face on your neck. "hm, good. because i really could spend the day between your legs." he hummed, bucking his hips to your touch.
"what about your cock, baby? can i have it in me all day?" you whispered in his ear, wanting to repay the experience he gave to you.
baekhyun's head popped up immediately, nodding eagerly, whimpering. "ah—yes. let me fuck you, angel." he pleaded, crashing on top of you in a way that made you laugh, as both of you lost your minds together for the rest of the afternoon.
Warnings: violence, blood (duh), implied sexual assault, eventual smut 18+ only MDNI
WC: 5.5k
A/N: Here's the vampire au! I finally decided to post it! Huge thanks to @miabbh for the encouragement to finally finish this fic, if it wasn't for your feedback and kindness I don't think I could've fallen back in love with this fic the way I did, I really can't overstate my appreciation <3
Masterlist
“HELP! SOMEBODY-”
The scream was abruptly cut off, and even from a few blocks away, the sickly sweet smell of blood pierced his senses, his mouth watering. There must’ve been a lot of it.
After debating with himself for a moment, Baekhyun decided he had to at least go look, had to at least see if he could help, and he started running towards the sound of the screams. What he ended up finding was a gruesome sight.
A young woman lay sprawled out on the concrete in a narrow alleyway, clothes torn off, covered in her own blood. The monster who’d done this to her had already taken off and Baekhyun wanted to go after him, but by the look of things, there was no time to spare.
He crouched down next to her, looking for where the blood could be coming from, talking, trying to keep her from passing out. “You’re gonna be okay, it’s okay. He’s gone now. Can you tell me what day it is? Your name?”
She wasn't responding to anything he said, barely even conscious. The amount of blood around her didn't look good. When he felt for a pulse, it was barely there. He turned her head, getting a good look at the side of her neck, and he saw a deep gash, blood still pouring out in a steady stream.
Baekhyun knew then that she wouldn't make it. She'd lost so much blood already that she was turning pale, and he was surprised she was still awake at all.
The whole time she looked up at him, the light in her eyes slowly fading away. She gathered all the strength she could, and raised one arm, just slightly, weakly grabbing the sleeve of his shirt.
“Help me..”
It was barely a whisper. He only had one option left.
The smell of her blood was so unbelievably strong. He hadn't felt that kind of thirst in years, so when he heard those two words, he gave into it.
He leaned into the side of her neck that hadn't been cut, and bit her, feeling the rush of fresh blood hitting his tongue for the first time in over a century.
The taste was otherworldly. Thick and sweet, though he knew he couldn't take too much. After a few seconds he reluctantly pulled away, and for a moment he was afraid that he'd already been too late, or had taken too much.
The bleeding stopped, and the life behind her eyes flickered away. Her arm fell back to the pavement, completely limp, and this time when he tried to find a pulse, there was nothing.
She was gone, but still, he waited.
~
You gasped, sitting up quickly, too quickly, dark splotches disrupting your vision.
With eyes squeezed shut, you took a few deep breaths before opening them again. This time, your surroundings were much clearer.
Large windows overlooking an old growth forest. Modern architecture, equally modern, but still cozy furniture. None of that sad gray/beige minimalist shit. Tall, well stocked bookshelves, and the daybed you now sat upright upon.
Someone’s house, no doubt, but you definitely didn’t know anyone with a place like this.
“You're awake.”
The voice was deep and smooth, chocolatey, almost. The man who’d produced it looked equally decadent from where he now stood in the doorway.
Confusion, surprise, or something along those lines kept you quiet as he came closer. Once at your bedside, he took your chin in his hand, moving your head to get a good look at both sides of your throat, before letting out a sigh of relief. Both the gash and bite marks were completely gone. When he stepped back again, he showed you a soft smile.
“I'm Baekhyun.” He said, holding out his hand.
You weren't sure why you went with it, but reluctantly shook his hand anyway, introducing yourself before asking, “What's going on?”
Rationally you knew that waking up in a strange man's house in the forest would be reason for fear or even panic, yet you felt nothing of the sort.
He sat down at the edge of the bed, giving you a surprisingly sympathetic look.
“Something happened to you last night. What’s the last thing you remember?”
“Just walking home from the bar… I don't think I made it home though, and then I woke up here.”
“You don't remember anything else?”
You shook your head.
His eyes met your own, a blank, unreadable expression on his face, “Someone attacked you. I heard you screaming, but by the time I got there the guy was gone, and you were bleeding out.”
“What?” Still confused, you tried to piece it all together, and slowly, some things started to come back to you. First, that a man had started to follow you home, then how you'd begun to run away from him, but after that it all went black again. Still, this guy had to be insane. There was just no way.
“What do you mean I was bleeding out? That makes no sense, I’m not hurt at all.”
You sat up straighter, rolling your shoulders, moving your legs, and everything felt okay, but something was still off.
“It's hard to explain,” he got up, “I'll be right back, I promise things will start to make more sense in just a minute.”
When he returned to your bedside he was holding a bag, the type you'd see at a hospital, full of what looked like blood. The sight did little to remedy your confusion.
Until he took a metal straw, and punctured it. The thirst was so immediate and so intense, it felt as if you were choking on hot sand. You didn’t think, just grabbed the bag, and drank it down, until every last drop was gone.
You stared at the empty bag, straw still sticking out. The sweet taste of iron was unmistakable.
Baekhyun gave you a minute, letting you come to terms with everything. When you noticed him again, he was handing you a mirror. Your eyes were a deep red, skin so pale you could almost see through it.
“What did you do to me?” You whispered, unable to tear your eyes away from the terrifying reflection staring back at you.
He could see clearly how shocked and scared you were and sat down with you again, this time taking one of your hands in his, startling you with how cold it was.
“You were about to die when I found you, so I changed you. My eyes look like that too.”
You watched as he took out the colored contacts he was wearing, discarding them along with the blood bag before sitting back down at the end of the bed. His eyes were red, just like yours.
He could see how you struggled to make sense of it all, so he got up to leave again, but you stopped him, holding onto his hand and pulling him back down with you.
“Wait- why can I see my reflection?”
Baekhyun laughed, relieved in a way. You seemed to actually be handling it fairly well. Either that, or the weight of it all had yet to really hit you.
“The movies get a lot of stuff wrong. We can go out in the sun, too, it just hurts our skin and eyes a little more than normal. You’ll want to invest in some good sunglasses. A wooden stake through the heart doesn't work either. If you would've rather died I could get you the right poison, though.”
You furrowed your brows, still unsure what to make of it. “No thanks…”
He smiled, “That’s good to hear.”
Despite the extremely off putting color, his eyes were still soft, gentle. His face overall just looked kind somehow. He was extremely attractive, without a doubt, but it was more than that. His jawline was sharp, but the rest of his features were soft, full pink lips, a round nose, and eyes that were a little downturned. Even knowing what he was, you weren’t scared of him at all. He almost looked a bit like a puppy, definitely not threatening in any way.
“So… how does this work? Am I gonna have to.. You know…” Bile rose in your throat at the mere thought, and the poison he mentioned came to mind again .
“You don’t have to kill people, no. I can help you get as much blood as you need. I’m a hematologist, so I just take what I need from the hospital.”
You let out a sigh of relief. “A vampire blood doctor? That’s kind of perfect, actually.”
Saying the word out loud sent a chill down your spine. It did make sense though. You felt lighter, faster, and your senses were sharper than they ever had been while human.
“You seem to be taking all of this really well.” He laughed, “Most people freak out a whole lot more when they first get turned.”
“I’m just glad I’m alive I guess, or at least not dead, dead, you know what I mean.”
As he grinned back at you, you noticed the pointed tips of his canines, an interesting contrast to the rest of his features. You wondered if he had always been this beautiful, or if it was what he was that made him look so ethereal. Jet black hair, pale skin, and red eyes would make almost anyone else look plain creepy, but he pulled it off beautifully. It was a struggle not to stare.
“Happy to help.”
His smile was magnetic, and as the minutes passed, every little thing about him drew you in. There was a sense of calm that came with his presence, comfort in his proximity. Rationally, you knew that your reaction to the entire situation should’ve been far more dramatic. But when you looked at Baekhyun, even now that you knew what he’d turned you into, and the fact that you had essentially died, his presence felt overwhelmingly positive.
“So I have to live off of human blood now? Is that the only difference?”
“Well, no. You won’t age anymore, and you can’t die unless you drink a specific blend of herbs. You can still eat human food, but it won’t satisfy you and you won't crave it anymore either. Humans naturally gravitate towards us, it's supposed to help us hunt, so going out to bars could get pretty annoying. Let’s see what else.. Oh, you also won’t be sleeping anymore.”
You took it all in, nodding as he explained it all to you. “Can I go home then? Do I just need to come back here when I get thirsty?”
He sighed, shooting you a look of guilt mixed with sympathy.
“No, sorry. You’ll have to stay away from living people for a few months, at least. If you were to walk around on the street right now the smell and thirst would almost definitely cause you to kill someone. Blood fresh from someone’s body is different than from a bag, the taste and smell is a lot stronger. It’ll take time and practice for you to learn to control the thirst.”
“A few months?! Fuck.” For the first time that day, something resembling real fear, even panic, overtook you. Your family, friends, job, would all be wondering where you were. You couldn’t exactly tell them the truth, and dreaded having to come up with some kind of explanation. You were starting to realize just how much this had changed your ‘life’.
Not only that, but this meant you had to stay in this house, with this oddly enticing stranger, for the next couple months.
“What do I tell my friends and family? They’re going to freak out if I tell them I can't see them for so long. I don’t want to bother you, either.” You groaned.
“I knew what I was getting myself into when I made the decision to change you, don’t worry about me. As for your loved ones, call them, make something up, they can come here if they aren’t convinced and I can talk to them, I can be very convincing. I know it’s not ideal but I still thought it would be better than letting you die.”
You nodded, letting out a heavy sigh. Several more minutes passed as you sat in silence with all this new information, doing all you could to try and come to terms with everything. You were surprised that you did so well to fight back the tears. Baekhyun stayed by your side, which came as a welcome comfort.
“What do you do for work?” He eventually asked, breaking the tension.
“I'm a writer.” You told him. “I have an assignment due in a couple days, no way I'll be able to turn it in. I'm definitely getting fired.”
You groaned, having worked your ass off for that job. As it all sunk in more and more, the tears began to eventually fall. You knew then that your life as you'd known it was over.
“What kind of writing do you like to do?” Baekhyun was genuinely curious, but he was also hoping that his talking would distract you from the heaviness of it all.
You let out a deep sigh, before explaining, “What I like is creative writing. I've been working on a novel for a while but haven't gotten very far with how busy I am. I work in journalism but the stories I get assigned aren't really what I want to write about. I'm lucky to have a writing job at all, though. Or at least I did.”
“Well, what if you use this time to work on that novel? You can tell your friends and family that you found someone to sponsor an extended retreat to finish your novel, that you're staying in a cabin out in the forest to focus on your writing. You can tell them I'm your editor, they could even visit once you can comfortably be around people again.”
“That's… actually not a bad idea. I just don’t know if I really have it in me to finish it, I know I doubt myself too much, that’s another reason I haven’t gotten more of it done so far.”
Baekhyun beamed, “I’m sure you’ll do great, I might be able to help, too. I’m no professional writer, of course, but I love reading and could give you feedback. I've actually done that for some writers you probably know. I like to think that my advanced age has given me plenty of time to develop some semblance of good taste.”
You smiled, though weakly. As hard as it was to come to terms with everything, he did give you some hope that maybe it would all turn out alright in the end after all.
“Do you do this kind of thing a lot? You know, changing people? Being a doctor and all?” You wondered, hoping to take your mind off of your own misfortune at least for a little while.
“No. You’re the first person I’ve changed in over a hundred years.”
“What? Seriously? Even when you see a kid dying of leukemia or something?”
He frowned. He could see where you were coming from, of course, but it wasn’t that simple. “I have to consider the greater good. Not every vampire can just take the blood they need from whatever type is in lowest demand in donations. If I changed people all the time without looking after them the way I am with you, even more people would end up dead.”
“Why me then?”
He thought for a second, contemplating the true reason, of which he still wasn’t completely sure. He gave you his best guess;
“When people die at the hospital, it’s usually the final act of a slow and painful process. Often, depending on the level of their pain, it can even come as a relief. They have all of their loved ones surrounding them, and they’ve said everything they want to say. They’re prepared to die, to whatever degree that’s possible, but you weren’t given that luxury. What happened to you was so cruel, so sudden, and honestly, the smell of your blood was very, very strong. You were dying, and asked me to help, so I did the only thing I could.”
As you listened to him, you came to realize that you weren’t wearing the clothes you’d had on the night before, but something he must’ve put on you. A wave of nausea made you hunch over further.
“When you found me.. What had he done?” You asked, cautiously, unsure if you really wanted to know the answer.
Baekhyun had been wondering when you would start asking, and only hoped that what he knew wouldn’t jog your memory to the particularly heinous parts.
“I can’t be sure, because he was gone by the time I got to you. But, you were on the ground in an alley with a deep gash on the left side of your throat, probably an inch deep, more than enough to kill, and you were covered in your own blood.”
He chose to leave out the way your clothes had been torn off.
Still, it was easy enough to connect the dots. The same man who’d followed you, who you eventually started running away from, had caught up to you and done his worst.
Your stomach seemed to fold in on itself, a horrible, twisted ache spreading from your throat down your gut, and up through your skull.
Baekhyun watched as tears filled your eyes, quickly spilling over into a steady stream. You tried to keep it together but it was no use, and he could see that. He didn’t want you to feel like you had to hold back so he started to get up, but you grabbed the hem on his shirt and pulled him back down.
“Don’t leave, please.”
Your hand wound up in his, his thumb running a soothing path across your knuckles. Crimson eyes gazed back at you, filled with more empathy than those of most living people you’d met. Even after many decades as a doctor, having to be the bearer of bad news again and again, it still never got easier for him.
He was caught off guard when you suddenly yanked on his hand, pulling him towards you and wrapping your arms around him, using him as a shoulder to cry on.
Slowly, his arms wrapped around you as well, and he started rubbing your back.
“It’s over now, you’re okay, he can’t hurt you anymore.” He whispered, feeling how your body continued to shake with the intensity of your sobs.
It took a while for the initial pain to fade to something more manageable, even with him right there with you, but eventually it did. You didn’t want to think about it anymore, didn’t want to give that awful man any more control over how you felt. You were still around despite it all, and that was what mattered most.
Baekhyun kept his eyes on you as you sat back, letting go of him and wiping the last of the tears from your damp skin.
“Sorry about that.” You forced a short laugh.
“No need to apologize, not at all.”
The reassuring smile on his pretty pretty face would’ve made your cheeks warm up, had you been able to blush.
“Do you want a tour of the house?” He asked, hoping he could offer you something to take your mind elsewhere.
You nodded, and he helped you up out of bed, showing you room after room, and it was all so him. Comfortable, beautiful, but eerie. He undoubtedly had great taste, and it wasn’t at all the dungeon you would expect of a creature like him. Most every room was bathed in natural light, large windows everywhere, it was the forest on the other side that made it feel so otherworldly. Like something out of a dark fairy tale, though the modern design still didn’t seem out of place.
“How far are we from the city?” You wondered.
“A little over an hour, it’s pretty secluded out here, but I like it that way. I like being able to enjoy the view without worrying about anyone seeing me here without my contacts, or sipping on one of those blood bags. You won’t have to worry about anyone getting close enough to trigger your thirst, either.”
“You really like the forest, I’m guessing?”
He smiled, “Yeah, no matter how many decades go by, trees are always still just trees. It’s comforting, I suppose. They're so old, it makes me feel young by comparison. I like going on walks, too, enjoying the smell of the greenery without any humans around to stink it up.”
You watched his profile as he gazed out of one of the many windows, enjoying the enormous moss covered trees on the other side. He seemed so comfortable here, having made the best of his situation, and you found solace in that. If he could figure it out, maybe you could too.
Once the tour was over, you both settled into the couch in the main living area, facing another set of floor to ceiling windows overlooking the forest.
“How old are you?” You asked.
“When I was turned, or since then?”
“Both, I guess.”
“I was 32 when I turned, and next year it will have been 250 years since that night.”
“Wow.. what happened? I mean, how did you get turned?”
‘I can’t be sure, like you I don’t have any memory of the exact moment it happened, but I remember talking to a woman who looked.. Not human, being completely enamored with her, and then I woke up like this. I guess she probably meant to have me as a meal, but got interrupted, so I turned.”
You shot him a slightly confused look, “Do people not get turned any time they get bitten?”
“No, our saliva acts like a venom, and the person has to die with the venom in their system to turn. Usually when feeding on someone, they're drained so completely that there isn’t anything left to turn them, especially if the person who’s drinking from them doesn’t have any self control around blood yet. When that happens, they just die. I can’t imagine that woman wanted anything more than a meal, and I never saw her again, so I can only assume she got interrupted in the middle of it.”
“Do you still think about her a lot? About that night?”
He paused, seeming to contemplate for a bit before answering. “I used to, maybe for the first fifty years or so, but now, I’ve settled into this kind of existence and I understand that she likely didn’t have control over her thirst and was just going off of instinct, and I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“So… That means we can drink from people without killing them or turning them then, right?”
“Yeah, that’s how I got by for a while in my earlier days, but it's hard to find someone who knows about our world, and is willing to let you do that. Eventually they get tired of it or pass on anyway, and you have to figure something else out. That’s why I just stick to the blood bags from the hospital now, even if it isn’t as satisfying.”
You both gazed out at the enormous old trees, and you wondered, “You said you knew some writers I might’ve heard of? People that aren’t around anymore now, I assume?”
“Yeah.. I spent a lot of time on the east coast before coming to this side of the country. In Boston, when I was first studying medicine, I met Sylvia Plath, and I do still think about her. She was really a special person, so talented, but tortured. She really left an impact on me. Getting to read some of her poems before the rest of the world felt really special. I think she was also drawn to me because she saw that there was something different about me, beyond just the superficial charm that most humans perceive in us.”
You just stared back at him with wide eyes, your jaw almost on the floor. “You seriously knew her? What was she like?”
The more he told you about her, the more questions you had, and you ended up losing track of time as he told you everything he could remember from his time with her. She’d had a fascination with the supernatural that you’d never known about, and Baekhyun was certain that she’d been onto him, that she knew what he was. You couldn’t remember ever being so entranced in conversation, holding onto every word and not wanting to let go. He was giving you a window into a world you never could’ve imagined, and it ignited a newfound passion for your own writing.
He also asked about you, your life, interests, hobbies, and you told him all you could think of. All the while he looked at you intently, showing you his undivided attention, almost intimidatingly so. He asked a lot of questions, and you got the feeling he genuinely cared, that he wanted to know everything he could, that he wanted to understand you.
It had been a while since Baekhyun felt himself drawn to a woman, but he grew more fond of you the more time you spent together. He thought you were beautiful, and not only in the way that vampires naturally are. He'd thought so before you'd woken up, too.
He'd been on his own for a long, long time and your company made him feel warm. The more you opened up, he felt something within him stir, a sense of protectiveness, wanting to do all he could to make this transition more bearable. The better he was able to understand you, your interests, your values, your fears, the better he’d be at comforting you, and hopefully make this time as painless as possible.
When you were together, time seemed to go by quickly. You felt like you’d known him for much longer than just a day, by the time the sun started to set. Something about him felt familiar to you, like you’d known him in a past life. It felt silly to think about so soon, but you wondered if all of this had been destined to happen, that it was fate for you to meet him like this, even with how horribly it started.
There was one more question you had for him that had been weighing on your mind all day. You weren’t sure if you should ask, a little scared of the answer you might receive, but you couldn’t fight your curiosity.
“You don’t have to answer this, but I’ve been wondering, when you first turned, did you ever… lose control?”
He’d been gazing at trees, the sun almost hidden behind the horizon, but at that his eyes shifted solemnly to his hands in his lap, lips turning into a frown, and he nodded ever so slightly.
“It’s not something I like to think about.”
“I’m sorry-”
“No it’s okay, I understand why you’d want to know, if anything I should apologize, I can’t imagine it’s very comforting to hear that right now.”
Finally he looked your way again, eyes swimming with concern, worried he had scared you, that you would be terrified to be around him after knowing about his past.
You weren’t scared though, for whatever reason. It didn’t quite make sense to you either.
“It wasn’t your fault, I mean, you didn’t have anyone to help you, like how you’re helping me. I can’t even imagine how awful and confusing that must’ve been.”
“That's a very generous thing to say.”
A comfortable silence filled the room. Still, you felt yourself being drawn to him, wanting to touch him, though you weren’t sure where the line was, what was appropriate with him. You found yourself leaning into him anyway, resting your head on his shoulder, and unbeknownst to you, it brought a smile to his face.
Baekhyun knew why you’d trusted him so quickly, why you were so inclined to try and touch him, even if not in a sexual way thus far. It was a side effect he’d heard of but never experienced first hand, you being the first woman he’d ever changed. What he wasn’t sure of was how severe it would soon become.
When the sun was fully set, Baekhyun invited you to have ‘dinner’ with him, and told you he wanted to try something.
Holding up a wine glass, he told you, “I’m going to fill this with blood, and I want you to try to sip it, or at least not down it all in one go, alright?”
You nodded, and he left the room, returning with two glasses full of the thick red liquid, the smell of it entering the room before you could see him.
When he set one down in front of you, it took all of your willpower to keep from grabbing it and immediately gulping down the entire thing. He took a seat, holding his own glass in the air, and you picked up your own, clinked them together, shaking slightly as you slowly brought it to your lips. As soon as it hit your tongue you couldn’t help but start chugging it down, however Baekhyun’s voice reminding you to slow down snapped you out of it, and to your surprise, you were able to set it back down on the table, a little less than half still in the glass.
He was beaming, impressed by your restraint, even this early on. “You’re doing great! That’s really impressive for your first day.”
Hearing him praise you sent a wave of emotion coursing through you, you wanted to please him, wanted him to like you, the same way you were starting to like him.
As time went on you settled into your new life. Writing, getting used to not sleeping, practicing restraint whenever you’d feed, and spending time with him filled your days and nights. What you couldn’t get used to, was how much you were starting to want him.
Every day, every hour, it seemed, you grew more desperate for his touch. Mental images of his hands and lips on your body rudely intruded your every thought. Most days followed a similar routine, with him going to work, coming home after what felt like far too long, and having ‘dinner’ together, so it was easy to sense how quickly your feelings for him were growing.
And how could you not want him? He was nothing short of perfect. Around the house he usually wore a black silk robe, letting you see the strong outlines of his shoulders and chest. Whenever his back was turned, you would stare at his silhouette, his narrow waist and strong thighs, leading up to his back, which looked particularly inviting. The desire to wrap your arms around him, pressing kisses to the nape of his neck, was near constant. Every time you were around him now, the tension felt so thick, almost tangible.
While he’d be at work, you would only think about him, wanting him to come back to you as quickly as possible. He’d gotten you plenty of stuff to keep you occupied, to work on your hobbies, and your novel, but those were soon neglected. Instead you’d touch yourself for hours, but it still didn’t help. Even if you couldn’t be with him the way you craved, the closeness was still preferable to the emptiness you felt in his absence.
When he finally would get back, you’d spend all night with him, talking, or just watching something or reading together. Your heightened senses made it all so much more unbearable, too. Any time his cold skin would brush against yours even slightly it would cause you to gasp and press your thighs together.
However Baekhyun seemed blissfully, if not deliberately, unaware of it all.
In a feeble attempt to get his attention on you, and your body, more specifically, you often wore less than necessary. He’d gotten you lots of different clothes to wear, but you always opted for the shortest, lowest cut options. Occasionally you thought you caught him looking, but if he really did, his poker face was immaculate. You wanted, needed, anything, just the slightest bit of a hint that he might see you the same way, or at least find you appealing, sexually. But he seemed entirely indifferent, much to your disappointment.
As much as you wanted to get back into the world, to your family, and friends, the thought of leaving his home with no idea when you’d be back, and never once having been touched by him, made you want to cry. He’d become such an important figure in your life, you couldn’t just go and act like that was okay. But those thoughts were pushed down and away, still holding onto the hope that he would come around.
It felt entirely inconceivable, for you to leave him, to not be with him, to not be his. He simply had to come around, or there would be a part of you, that you knew would be torn apart.
i don't know exactly why but im so sad lately.... it's raining a lot, end of semester but we have no idea of our grades yet to check if we should take the exams, i cried during the whole day on my bday, i feel like i lost the creative part of me and can't get it back.... im aware of these all but still i don't get why i can't get batter...
