Disappointment was and always will be the last thing he endures while in the presence of his sister. In truth, she was much better than he was. Established, smart, and capable. Jack was a little like fragile china that you only got out for special people. One little touch and he’ll break into a million pieces. Perhaps Mia was the same way, in hindsight, but was capable of taping herself together with careful precision. All while Jack remained in pieces, hopelessly. He’ll become more and more broken pieces overtime and after a while, he’ll be dust. Jack was convinced his demise would be just like that, his family circling around a pile of dust and ash that was once a person. But now it was widdled away, gone. The drugs got him, is what most will say, even his parents. Though, really, it was his heart.
It’s why the topic of Malia now suddenly seems so daunting. Along with himself, his family hasn’t known anyone but Marion. They were meant to be a concrete promise, wrapped with a bow that also promised forever. They were supposed to last and flourish within success. But now here he was, scared of looking at someone the way he did Marion. “I think I do,” Jack says, only a little hesitantly. For a moment, he tries to smile, to remember that this was a good thing and not something to frown upon. Yet he can’t help the way his brows furrow, gaze lifting to the ocean once more. “It scares me. The idea of — being with someone again. I don’t know if I’d survive it a second time, you know? I wish heartbreak didn’t feel like dying.”
And maybe that was also why he was so worried for Mia now. To think that she was going through this alone, burying it deep while listening to all of Jack’s ailments ever since she arrived in Catalina. Jack, himself, wanted to apologize, yet she was. He can’t help but shake his head, leaning in to take both of her hands into his own. “Don’t be sorry. You didn’t do anything wrong. Not at all. I mean it.” The singer says, squeezing Mia’s hands gently, “He’s a fucking asshole. I’m so sorry. God, mom is gonna wanna murder him. Have you told them yet?” Mom meaning Mia’s mother and Jack’s stepmom, Samantha. She was a carefully righteous woman who would do anything for her children. Anything.
“Why don’t you stay with me for a little while? We can cloud watch like we did when we were kids and eat a bunch of candy that they didn’t know we hoarded over many, many Easters and Halloweens..”
When Mia was younger, she had wished she was more like Jack. Jack, who was fearless, and brave enough to move across the country to pursue his dreams and the person he loved. Jack, who stood on a stage and commanded attention while she still raised her hand before she spoke in meetings at work. She had been... so scared when she first learned about his problems. It shook her to her core to see who she viewed as the strongest person in her life facing such challenges, but when he entered rehab, she held out a bit of hope. To have him sitting beside her, talking with her like they used to when they were younger, it silenced the buzzing thoughts and anxieties floating around her head. Maybe he was okay now, maybe she didn’t need to worry. But still ,she did. That was just who she was.
Well... she certainly didn’t like those words coming out of her brother’s mouth. The engineer frowned deeply at him, raking her brain for the right things to say to make him feel better. Their mothers were much better at this than she was, they always knew the right thing to say. But right now, she felt at a loss for words. “I...” She stumbled over the right words, breathing deep through her nose before she turned her body to face Jack. “I... I don’t think you’d be this scared if you didn’t really care about her. And that should be all that matters, right?” Mia realized how naive the words sounded as soon as she said them, and she took a moment to scour her brain once more to see if she could pull out something even remotely useful. Honestly, it felt like anything she said at the moment would be the pot calling the kettle black. Of course, there were other things that mattered besides simply loving someone. She had learned that the hard way. “You like her, she likes you, the past should... stay there, you know?” They both had a hard time letting go of the past. Hopefully, they both could get better at that.
She groaned and buried her face in her hands. “No, no, I... I should have known something, right? I mean, I practically lived with the guy for four years. I have a PhD, I should be able to tell when someone is sitting there lying to my face for that long!” The words came out so quickly, she had to take a large breath when she was finished as she hadn’t taken a pause in the middle of her rant. Mia was so... angry at him, in a way she had never been at anyone, and for some reason, she couldn’t seem to let that anger go no matter how much time had passed. “No, I haven’t told them, are you kidding me? Can you even imagine what- I don’t even want to think about how angry mama would be. And mom would just... worry and... I want to spare them that, if I can. I mean, I’m an adult, I should be able to handle my own heartbreaks by now.” As she said it, she realized how ridiculous she sounded. Handling a heartbreak didn’t mean up and jetting off to the other side of the country to avoid it.
She smiled at him, knowing he meant well. He was her brother, he had taken care of her for as long as she could remember. Still, he had his own issues, she didn’t want to intrude. “You know I’m not your baby sister anymore, right? I can... I can take care of myself now, I think.”