MilitiaPax @militiapax - Tumblr Blog

I Was There(Great)...Again

Trumpur(i)nations to us All! We’re all bout to get pissed on!

Washington DC resembled that of a (I’m told) harry potter fog/ whitey? people game of thrones dystopian nightmare. But mostly Dark Knight. I don’t know if it was Trump jacking Bane’s speech with grim, hitler-esque tones of totalitarian madness or the bird flocks looming feverishly around the white house like a wild pack of bats, but it was a spot on parallel to everyone’s worst knightmares rolled into a huge piece of frightful blockbuster entertainment. And the reality show rolls on.

The sky looked like dark knighttime and blinding day white at the same time (and not just the fact that trump’s fan club was almost exclusively white).

Insane amount of security, took 45 minutes to walk through a checkpoint. These did not exist at Obama’s inauguration, where there was WAY MORE PEOPLE, who was gloriously happy, singing Bob Dylan, and being vaguely observed by like 14 snipers. That brilliant day eight years ago, people flooded the mall, search-free, and though it was far colder, everyone was warm. It was a great day. This, this was something entirely different. Took almost an hour to get through the ridiculous line, but not after security dramatically broke the stick that was supporting my NODAPL sign, with white priv trump bros taunting me with “just like your broken dreams”. Once inside, it was clear no one was there, just a hitler-esque speech about carnage and a war on muslimism. It was bleak to say the last. This is what the end of America sounds like.

Had to get away from the terrible sounds of hatred and racism and found far more people protesting nearby. Saw a busted up limo, though no evidence of who did it, and it was claimed later the vehicle was set on fire. So the chants got louder and then the masses came out, still peaceful, but heated. They used the limo thing to justify pepper spraying everyone ever, including elder women who were just singing. Then they started dropping bombs like WW7 and people were running down the streets for their lives. The blockbuster movie again. Retreating in the park nearby, hearing the bombs dropping, there was talk of a soldier who was experiencing PTSD by being there; chaos was everywhere. I heard everyone smoked at 4:20 into trump’s speech, which I distantly smelled, but mine was a smoke cloud of terror. When it was all said and not done, peoples’ eyes were burning, horrid smells of berning encompassed city blocks, chemicals were taste-able in the air, 200 arrests of people rounded up in the area that did nothing now facing insane felony charges; the city was on fire….not a strong start.

The Awokening

The following day was like a waking of a dead collective unconscious. There were so many people flooding the streets. Just maybe there are some good people left. It was reassuring, yet heartbreaking to think what they and their children will have to endure. On the way out, saw a Muslim man being arrested outside an apartment building in VA. Probable coincidence but weird sight nonetheless, chilling past future reminders of the madness ahead and behind.

Walking with all the people, the women, the children, so many clever signs, it was a breathtaking image. The celebrity scene was tight too. Lil’ bigg Mikey Moore was there again, inspiring us to action through his humor, his confessed crippling social anxiety, and the beginning of an anti-trump satire movement. Scarlett Johansen seemed to get it, and Ashley Judd’s words chilled to the very core. Madonna was a little questionable, particularly her performance, but the indigo girls soothed with a once popular uplifting 90s vibe, we have to bring that sound with us into this uncertain future. There’s something about the wonder of the unknown that seemed exciting, not frightening, on the capitol that day. That if there are enough good people still left in this country, we really might use this horror show to create something amazing. The revolutionary shift is truly upon us now, people are getting woke AF, etc. Uplifting, inspiring, and lots of chanting. “Show me what democracy looks like “ “This is what Democracy looks like. “ “Whose streets?” “our streets!” (not wall street), we even threw a couple “Bernie would have wons” into the mix; it was not difficult to get that one going quick et loud. Flooding through the streets with the largest crowd I’ve ever marched with, full of so many passionate, compassionate women and human beings, was truly glorious expression of an engaged political process that works of the people, for the people, and by the people.

Non-Alternative Facts

To be clear, There were WAY MORE PEOPLE at the womens’ march than the Inauguration

The women’s march was a reassuring, hopeful bucket of sunshine compared to the apocolypto ****show I had witnessed the day before. And there were a ton more people there. I repeat : There were way, way MORE PEOPLE AT THE MARCH ON SATURDAY, no matter how much the fake media actual photos tries to lie to us with facts. And for the record, way more of those who actually showed up Friday were there to protest Donny, and everyone there Saturday was protesting him except twelve embarrassed/angry trumpets, so the numbers are not in his favor. FAUX FACTcheck

There was a point with an engaged discussion between trumpets and non-trumpets that was uplifting, hopeful, and something different to see. Most of the exchanges between us were heckles.

One month Down…so far Down to go

My journey was wrapping up in DC, but only beginning to unwrap for life after Donny. As long as maniacs roam free in that tainted house I kept staring at in wonder and disgust, the fight will continue. As long as injustice and inhumanity occurs, WE the people will be here.

I walk past the massive sign displays lining a fence, greatly resembling a certain future Mexican wall, only these were expressing messages of hope and peace, not division and hatred. I left a couple of the signs I had been carrying around all day against the fence. I hope this incredible art piece stays here until Trump is impeached, but I am told they were all burned later that night by Trump’s thug brigade fan boys. Ew L Though this week has been a shakey start (understatement of the century), the marches and protests come to confirm what we knew all along: this country is great because of those who stay involved, not those who stay in charge.

REVELATION NATION

It’s more than kinda crazy we rejected a qualified woman running for prez for the most sexist, sexual assaulting, and least qualified man to ever run for prez. Double Slap in the face for women, and now trumps tryin to close planned parenthood and ban abortion so it as a reaction to all those things and much more. nobody there cared that hill dawg didnt get a divorce. i know i dont.

This man can shove his way into our heads and twitterings and blood and infect us with the new old fascists amerika that was always there but you tried not to talk about til that black dude left the room.

What has happened here today leaves many stunned, punched, and wanting to move to Europe. But there’s no escape from tyranny, there’s no escape from dictatorship or racism or the few with so much wanting to keep it at the expense of their fellow people. (well maybe Sweden?) When there is enough for us all but some want more and that’s ok because “I worked for it” but don’t see how it’s the rich we should blame. The working poor felt the sadness, the women felt it--

Do you believe us now, do you feel how fragile your life really was and the floor slipping out from under the poor. “I wont be affected” you will, plus that kinda makes you sound like a dick bag, big time.

We are each other, one people. If there is injustice , it must be made right, and especially by those more so in the position to do and not suffering the same as those oppressed most, our Fellow Humans.

And we’ve lost Ourselves, only to find Ourselves

We have much to fight for now, don’t you see?

This is the point in the world… this is it.

No exaggerating, no whammy—just WHAM

I saw it but I still don’t believe it.

The sinking feeling that swept the crowd under a fog that was darkness but blinding white

Is it snowing

Are there bombs going off

YES, and you will have nightmares for weeks, but that’s nothing compared to four years, four more minutes

and the city burns, and not in the good berning way, the way that makes you see that the inherent flaws within capitalism and this great experiment of democracy that has truly succumbed to the inescapable corruptions of man. THAT kinda way

8 years ago it was all different. Funny to think. Makes you laugh that painful cringe that turns a stomach

In the way that Ashley judd could catapult southern words into our shivering goosebumped souls-

It wasn’t even cold, not raining like the yesterdays of inaugurations-

How long ago that must have been

We are Fighting for what we are Living for

Why bother? Everyone has their reasons—the families gathered here are fueled by love

Why did people vote for trump? Everyone has their reasons

Mostly action comes from places pushed to walls, bumps of dissatisfaction

we’ve grown too irritated to keep scratching, maybe we’re just tired

Meryl Lynch Streep

And even when the most beloved women who the public idolized like a star in the sky, defended the cripples and those who were different, and even those who weren’t. she herself was not defended, instead the public began to question even her trusted voice of wisdom, they questioned very facts as presented by a corporate fueled source-well I guess that part did make a little more sense-but they weren’t asking the right questions

Who made the choice---when we think we’re doing something on own , hand tied to its pupeteer.

“You’re a puppet. “no YOU’RE the puppet”

We’re ALL PUPPETS, getting played by the puppeteer, and now it’s gotten worse,

How do we get out of this nowwwww ---sinkink sinking sink holes earthquakes?

You did technically want it this way. depravity enforced, we can all speak our filthy little minds now

But it pushes you somewhere when things got lost so lost

We can cry and be babies and we are but we need to get out there now

Put bodies in ideas, action in passive, standing but sitting (in)

Just to clarify in a time where Nothing is Clear:

man-hating feminists? they been calling women who stand up for womens' rights that forever-don’t let it get to us now !! and not on our big day !

the trumpers sc(r)ewed perspective is less credible than Trump thinks CNN is. yeah no, i was there, the women were standing up for themselves, with a bunch of men with them in solidarity. if anything they might have been angry at specific white dudes taking away their rights...makes sense. This blind love of trump twists reality, and reasoning has mostly gone out of open close-minded windows. 1) they weren't specifically anti-pro life, whatever that is, they spoke to maintaining planned parenthood and affordable womens' healthcare. 2) there were tons and tons of organizers who've worked on a variety of campaigns, so it's possible one has questionable ties. this should in no sense discredit the event. 3) i saw no volugarity, just an inspirational crowd of men and women who care about the future for them and their children. im sure some would be offended by some things throughout the march, but that will happen in a ginormous crowd of passionate people, made up of families, women, and men all coming together peacefully. thought it was super non-vulgar

Inspiration Nation

honestly, there is something very wrong and darkly twisted within this current ray of disarray, trump, all his cabinet picks, all of it. Examine the true direction of this country, the true nature of the people living here. Stop allowing misinformed, destruction to keep circulating as news. This will not stand but know there are many to resist on all sides, that’s why we need to all join the same team. There are 99% of us getting wrecked and everything else is a distraction, keep us fighting, keep it us vs. us, when everyone knows it has and will always be (until we unite) US vs THEM. In the past, people waking up to it, those who are hip to it and get others on board, well we know what happens to them. That’s why this many of us getting pissed off, standing up to corrupt leaders across the world, we will finally reach the ultimate level of our strength in numbers (plus there’s more people on the planet now than there’s ever been, and that’s a hard fact to be faux).

Is it possible we can actually win now, again, yet for the first time? We have no other choice. The tipping point is upon us, environmentally, there is no choice. Socially, religiously, economically, there is no choice. Make or break, do or die, stay WOKE but get WOKER, and much, much quicker. People have been fighting for this for years , they’ve laid the groundwork, now for the berners and youthers and lovers and thinkers and dreamers-- to bring it home. You’ve been informed (shout out to Bernard on this one), you can no longer keep your heads sandy and your hearts wavering. Join us, the militia pax, the war of peace, THE fight-it must be fought, has been fought, will be fought. No choice left but to WIN.

��o�Z��

#stillsanders womens'march

Make America Vote Again

To the Editor,

Both Green Party candidate Jill Stein and Libertarian Gary Johnson should be allowed to share the debate stage with Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump this month and beyond. Both presidential hopefuls are on enough ballots in enough states to actually win the presidency and according to some polls, are hitting the 15% mark necessary for a candidate to be included in the debates. In the national polls necessary to secure this 15%, some only give Clinton and Trump as options, making them disproportionately favored towards the two party system. With both on the ballot in 40+ states, and approval ratings exponentially increasing, Stein and Johnson have enough campaign momentum to make them worthy of presenting themselves to the American people and actually have a shot at gaining ground by finally reaching the masses.

There are almost 320 million people in this country and 2 political notions to represent their beliefs, and both have major problems in representing these beliefs admirably. It’s no wonder that half of Americans don’t even vote, and yet over 40% are registered independent. In this consideration, there are far too many independents out there to not have any representation in the general election. Throw in a couple worthy options, you will see an increase in voter turnout. When people feel they have had this primary stolen from them, from the fiasco with the DNC to the grim Republican options, another choice must be offered. This election has been so riddled with political dysfunction that this really should be the year to at last hear more than two disheartening sides, a fair fight maybe.

This struggle has been going on for a while, but another party has never really had a true shot to win in the past. I mean, the stuff with McCarthy was kinda a disaster. And Ross Perot? He was the last independent allowed to debate, but he was better liked when played by Dana Carvey on SNL. Jill Stein did run in 2012, but she was nowhere near as widely known, and with the popularity of Bernie Sanders, coupled with the unpopularity of both major candidates, what better time to have a third and fourth party re-engage the frustrated, disenfranchised American voters that Bernie left behind? Make America Vote Again! Voting independent need not just be about making a statement; if people get to watch a true debate this year, those otherwise unaffected voters could help to sway the election. Side note: Shouldn’t Trump do what Reagan did in 1980 and support an independent debating? The Donald is always saying how rigged the two party system is and that politics as usual isn’t working, that’s his thing, so surely he should be all about this, at least for Gary Johnson.

I fully understand the 2 path road we’ve been on, it’s convenient and always a little messed up, especially under the surface, But what if we could have someone we actually wanted, that didn’t have to adhere to these dark party restrictions; someone who could bring together people on both sides, until we realize there are no sides, just divisions used to distract us and pin us against each other, 99% vs. 1%, not 50% vs 50%. This has been a crazy race, and people are fed up. Things can’t change in the way we need them to within a corrupt two party system, they haven’t been, and when you get beyond that machine that keeps holding us back, weighing us down with a comforting “that’s just the way things are”, the possibilities exponentially grow. So we shouldn’t give up or forget what we discovered, especially now, moment to demand justice for a questionable primary with a fair presidential election. When we vote, and who we vote for, shows the powers that be that we’re paying attention. Our voices have been silenced for too long and this letter attempts to address and amend this voter suppression and disengagement by insisting that all four candidates be allowed to debate. I thank you for this consideration and hope this is the election where America votes again.

Sincerely,

Allison

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

�

#makeamericavoteagain

bernie sandwiches just taste better

So everyone keeps coming up to me and asking, “What do we do now about Bernie?” maybe it’s the “berning down the house” shirt I’m wearing, or maybe it’s the look of still hopeful idealism in my eye. It could also be the fact that I worked for the campaign a bunch, and I don’t mean posting on dank Bernie meme stash, although that group is epic, or ranting to everyone in the range of earshot about our only hope, our greatest opportunity for something better, which is also pretty cool. Let’s just say I was calling Guam at 2am and going to New Hampshire doorsteps in the freezing dark to try to change the world. I don’t expect a medal, a party would be nice, but I do expect to see progress, a movement of momentum and caring compassion, and yeah, it would be nice if we could all do this together too. Each of us doing our part can achieve great things.

Bernie is just an old dude, who’s been doing his part above and beyond, and we all need to step up and support that. He has literally been standing up to the most powerful, corrupt, greed-driven forces in this country, maybe the world, and we’re not gonna have his back? He’s risked his life, daily, and I’ve seen him personally do it multiple times, speaking to people in public, no metal detectors, just to reach out to a people, a society that so desperately needs the unity and justice this man represents. But he is just one old dude, and this is about something far larger.

I’ve seen a bunch of nonsense this election season; laughed, raged out, continue to cry, but we must fight on. This country actually has the potential to improve itself and with all the young, enthusiastic, ethical influx of political hopefuls, some hopeless, trying to make this world a better place, we will be on our way. This is the true intention of the world of politics, running a country, sustaining a civilization that needs to thrive and become something worthy…again? Make America worthy again…for the first time, but was it ever? Has anyone ever asked Trump to explain that expression or is it simply beyond comprehension, which is everything he says? I will say that America did once have a middle class, where people just wanted enough, living modestly, but comfortably…the feasible American dream. A lot less people were around here then, and the rich kept getting richer, the dreams loftier. When ya do finally wake up, you got a despicable orange creature yelling at ya that he’s come to destroy us all and you wonder how the frack you ended up in this haunting American nightmare.

So what can any of us do now? I don’t claim to know any answers, but I can recognize something is happening here, the shift of consciousness is certainly upon us, and now is the time to seize this force and build upon it before it vanishes away, like another passing pokemon in the breeze, ideals that die along with an individual campaign fad.

Ok, but do I think Bernie can still win? Of course I do! I’m willing to give possibility to a great many optimistic things that confirm there is some good left in this place. But on the real, Bernie can still run as an independent and Jill Stein, who’s running as a Green Party candidate and has doubled in popularity in the past couple months, has said that she would share the ticket with him, which is good, because it is really too late for him to be on his own ticket. I truly believe the Sanders/Stein ticket could win and here’s the breakdown:

1. Over 40% of this country is registered independent.

2. Anyone can vote for any candidate in the presidential election, no closed primaries, party affiliation blunders, etc.

3. During the general, dems, repubs, and independents can and will vote for him aka people love this guy still.

4. Disenfranchised people so sick of the corp party bs an independent could actually win.

5. Many Berners have no party allegiance and will not vote for Hill Dawg

6. Many repubs (and everyone) don’t wanna vote for the trump but refuse to vote for $Hillary. Bingo bango.

I fully understand the party stuff, and reasonable principles of course align with dems over republicans; but what if we could have someone we actually wanted, who didn’t have to adhere to the dark party restrictions, someone who could bring together people on both sides, until we realize there are no sides, just divisions used to distract us and pin us against each other, 99% vs. 1%, not 50% vs 50%. Don’t get me wrong, the extreme republicans are a horror and need to be addressed, but I’m suggesting that stopping them or this ever-present underlying evil isn’t a guarantee with Hillary either, and if Bernie could actually win it, it would a reasonable vote to cast. If you are just making a statement however, and they have no shot of winning, that’s another issue. When facing the donald and when comparing basic party principles, well yes, obvious Hillary seems better, but this is a crazzy race, and people are fed up, I know I am. Things can't change in the way we need them to within a corrupt two party system, and when you get beyond that machine that keeps holding us back, weighed by the sickening comfort of “that’s just the way things are”, the possibilities can exponentially grow.

Thus, Bernie and his message are very much in it still, don’t give up or forget what you’ve found, especially now, when the world will be watching the DNC in Philly, we must bern down the corruption, show the powers that be that people are paying attention, (if this is a true showing, could even sway super-delegates still). This is our culminating moment to demand justice, for a questionable primary, questionable speeches, and a bunch of other questionable stuff. Now is the time, so march on, and come to the marches. We are very much in this together, whether we like it or not, so might as well give good a chance.

#stillsanders #seeyouinphilly

pretty much pumpkins

PeachFest...one year after. (should I go this year? it’s comin up...)

PEACH FEST

Another journey into the unknown, and there’s music involved; what could excite these sedated, yet eager, hippies more?

We rolled up early, determined to work, but not as determined as we were to have fun. We could have both, everyone can really, all forms of happiness are achievable at a musical festival; we could even have fun working…imagine the possibilities.

The snake wranglers had already been combing the mountainous region for days, but I wasn’t convinced there weren’t some lingering foes. A rattlesnake was spotted the next morning, about 30 feet from where I was working; we were sharing their home after all. Some tripping dude was even allegedly bitten at one point…never found out what became of him.

Working VIP was a dream and I felt immersed in the event, really a part of something. Plus I could go in whatever entrance I chose, behind the scenes with the musicians, waving to the fellow worker bees, already immersed, knowing who to know. I can see how this sort of treatment could lend itself to elitism, or at least an ego inflation that affected the very way I walked. It had gone to my head and I wasn’t as ashamed as I’d thought. Did I really know myself at all? Certainties are an illusion; there is never a shortness of stuff to learn. Thursday late night was filled with Dopapod; arguably the best late night show of Peach, these dudes rocked it out hard. And no, I’m not just saying that because I knew the drummer way back when; but I will say, seeing Scotty on stage, fans adoring while he tore the drums a new asshole, as opposed to previously seeing him at small, crap venues, may have set them over the edge for me.

Trey’s first “ophicial” night left me pained for Phish but feeling the same endorphins that their performances release in me. He was on fire and it was clear how charged his band made him. His encore was a Zeppelin cover of “Black Dog”, sex on stage exchange with Jennifer Hartswick. It was complete with thrusting, grinding in time, in synch, in love even, and I may have been a distance away, but pretty positive they were making out by the last note. Music is powerful in this way; it elevates a connection that nothing else would do justice, wouldn’t come even close. They just delved into those moments and let the sounds carry their souls, and ours. It was pretty beautiful actually.

Cabinet (or was it the infamous string dusters? Naw, pretty sure it was cabinet, but the string dusters were pretty infamous too) played the late night and so pleased I went with them over Big Gigantic, who are also good, but had seen them a couple times already that summer and didn’t feel like dub-stepping around that mountain too hard. Cabinet was exhilarating, crowded, openly outdoors, and as redneck as hippies get. Pretty much all you would hope from a bluegrass show. I was told my jokes were on fire that evening, and I’d like to think I too was peaking from great music and great times and alcohol.

The wagon races went on for far longer than anyone expected, and I was equally shocked no one was seriously injured. Some people would stand in the middle of the racetrack, even after the “race is starting, get out of the way” warnings, just to jump out right before a trampling. This boldness rivalled the thrill of the drivers. (I know because I did it once, but not on purpose.) I didn’t actually ride a wagon, but my friend did, and I respect her all the more for such an act of bravery. Towards the end, a girl started going around taking bets, and it was later theorized in the depths of a letter drug experience that she and a few people were in on it, suggested the mad idea, and had brought it to other fests as well as some sort of money making, promotional spectacle. I mean, would a bunch of chill hippies really all suggest racing like lunatics down a hill in these wagons they somehow all planned to bring to a festival? And where did the wagons come from? Possible, but improbable. It was like that moment when you add up all the facts, consider all the options, and realize that “farfetched conspiracy theory” that’s been going around might legitimately be true, and seems far more likely than the “facts” the public has been force fed by sources with obviously self-indulgent motivations.

There was some great music still to come. Papadosio: great stuff, consistent, somewhat fresh, Dopapod was still better, though I do confuse their names every time for some reason, maybe because they’re so anagram-like. George Clinton: obviously a leg(end), but his dancers may have stolen the show again. Trigger Hippy was all right, especially for a new band, but kind of just wanted them to play all dead songs, I mean they’ve pretty much all played with the living members. Don’t tease me like that! At one point, things sounded not so great. Lotus was incredible and one of my favorite performances of the weekend; it all made sense. I’m not sure if Mofro and or Blackberry Smoke were involved, but I’m tempted to say yes, either or both.

First night of Allman brothers was unanimously a little weird. You could almost feel the drugs somewhat consensually taking over everyone present at the same time, and the music seemed somehow so far away, no matter how hypnotically you were drawn closer to it. This was probably because it didn’t seem very loud, the lines were jumbled, the guitars less classically guitar hero, more maddeningly chaotic. It came together from time to time, but not the cohesion expected, more reminiscent of Grateful Dead 1969, only not as impressive or hypnotically spacey. Allman second day was alternately incredible; euphoric, bluesy, heartfelt, and dripping with New Orleans; enhanced especially when joined by the legendary Taj Mahal, who I had been previously mourning morning missing and then they were like “And now, let’s bring out Taj Mahal, and I was like, “yes, epic, no misfortune can befall me here.”

There was much aimless wandering, but this was one of the few fests where I knew even the most directionless trek would end in exciting, enlightening entertainment. From impromptu jam sessions (the “off the wall” on the wall kids who lined up by a wall with a series of instruments prepared for the walkers by, many of whom stopped, who could resist? They played wagon wheel, knowing it was cliché, but not caring, because they wanted a unifying number and everyone could sing along) to me being consensually hit in the face with a cake (yes the icing apparently rejected my face and yes, I felt it’s greasy, spontaneous lingering the remainder of the weekend…did I care? Heaven’s no.) No, what I cared about was the music, getting to work on time, enriching my spirit, and making memories, whether I remembered them or not.

The last night promised many late night parties, the music never stopped, nor did the fire, even though security kept putting it out, it always managed to get lit up again, much like us all. Nothing but good vibes, we were all heading in different directions but on the same journey. We would go our own ways but our souls would remain interwoven. There’s something so brilliantly unifying about being in a place where you can be who you are, same page, you don’t have to seek out anything, it’s already there. The connection could come from the music, or the people, or the drugs, or the atmosphere, but mostly, the human experience, and the ability to cut through the madness that worms its way so hard through our hearts, clouding it with bullshit so we can’t see what’s truly there, what truly matters. Life is happening all around and we blind ourselves so much so it’s easy to miss it. This crowd was determined not to let such a thing happen, and for one weekend at least, that society endorsed distraction was usurped by the glory of the be here now. I mean it wasn’t Woodstock, but it was something.

PA in CA

fired up, ready to go

So much to avoid, hormones like freud, antibiotics, drugs beyond roids

This has MSG in it too? Palm oil, pipelines, Can it be true?

Giving us cancer, dumbing us down, following orders distracted by clowns

How can you respect what you can’t understand?

Listening to "wisdom" dispelled by a clan

Of cronies, homies, some you don’t know me’s,

No way to bring them down, they’re never not around

A petition, a frown, a sit in, a mound...

Of papers and bills, they give us the pills, and that’s just what they want, an illusion, a front

And us just sitting back, cutting them slack, knowing it’s whack but not giving a frack

Luxuries gone, Monsanto wrong

Wise up now, we don’t have so long

Watered down fluoride turns into frost

Jailtime, revolting, whatever the cost

Nothing is gained when nothing is lost

alone and in the way

Never reach those loving stars,

lightning bugged by chem-trail clouds.

Forces distant, pressed and pulled,

heavy but they wanted more.

Obsession is nature when buried high enough to scream.

Commit, conform, resign to the (in)sane;

dopamine’s for dopes anyway.

The silence maddened the unsavory to shredded ecstasy,

lingering in the fall of nothing’s cousin,

a relation of its own transformation.

BYOI--Bring your own illusions, we’re running low.

Tinted fires consume lazily, the only living warmth.

Bitter forces bind to breathless oxygen but they fall,

like passive rain on a potentially pleasant afternoon.

It was there without us and it will be again.

Tides of pulsing daggers mix in an emotionless sea.

Idiots. All of us, we could finally claim.

They do not care what becomes of you;

it’s harder wrestling the deranged before giants.

Wasted, tarnished seed of sterile generations;

little to say, few ways to mean it, less to be heard.

Wish away problems with strained caverns of solutions.

Knuckles grind into pavement; day-night dissolves.

Faces look to Moon’s ancient glow, staring for answers-

And that perpetual smile could only shadow,

“Sorry but at least you asked”.

Engrand

Whatever could have turned such decent people so cold, surely they felt something but could no longer remember how to express it, or the insides died, at least mine

They had separated themselves from each other and could therefore be detached, alone, angry, confused, resentful, and always different, always struggling to break down the inner walls that enclosed the city—r we in goddamn Berlin people? i mean really….

England is a frightful place, abrasive tongues and questionable motives and aggressive molestation, oh and conscientious robbery…and that was just the first night

How are we to survive together? don't we all want the same things? Or am I so different to want inner peace and fulfillment through my deeds and words. I want this to mean something; it is one life after all

Woman completely trashes set in full character breakdown—material possession that have suffocated her and ran her life. What do they amount to in the end? loneliness is inevitable but we’re all trying to escape so let’s get wild

-What void am I filling today?

How clever I am, or so I thought. But this isn’t what I wanted, this was never what I set out to prove, only to show we all clever, we all have stories, everyone must be important, or else what is there? That little fucker who just wants to fade into the background and drift through in a haze, I write to you, you dead to the world little wanker snap the fuck out of it. And once you do, help me out, cause now you owe me, if I impact I feel better too, even my most selfless act is the most selfish

So much opportunity…just need to make it all real

Pray for the lonely for they suffer in the most silent of ways. And while you’re at it, maybe you could actually hang out with one of em, you are already thinking about them and all. Take the next step from imaginary compassion to active contact, pity to love, moral code to human decency

There is no regret in the now, only consciousness

Are words enough to make us feel better? when they are, it’s beautiful

Im throwing myself a pity party…and all of Britannia is invited! Sure internationals, you’re welcome too but try not to invite all the Chinese, there’s simply not enough room…

Same clothes different day, against the wall, no seats for you

crave connection

Natural niceties

If I can sense their fun can they sense my insanity

Their accents cut through my coarse ways, which were so unrefined, but somehow more genuine

No one had answers, there were none left

And what is this “truth” but what we’ve come to understand, discovered, retold and edited

We had once experienced a history but it had been reinvented too many times to trust any longer

Packed in, all wanting to be a part of something, action, smiles, less alone, this must mean we’re still alive, cold pulses karaoke laughs from funny fosters, eurometroclavical

We can no longer focus on the negative, only that which brings us together and inspires us to do good

I challenge someone to listen to radioiodead.com for an hour and not love at least one song

Jack-a-rose 6-8-77

these r the things dreams are made of

ur birfday, wow creepy

all i can eat here is Danish salami

that seems ironic

their cheese sucks

how do u fuck up cheese?

americha must b adding some even more insane addictive shit to our food than I previously thought

cause nothing tastes quite right

im also heavily into week2 of my withdrawal so that can’t b helping

there was a mcdonalds in town, and i almost passed out from temptations of shitty shitty delicious deadly odors

learn how to eat britianis, and while you’re at, quit luring amercians here under false pretenses

i thought the chinese had jacked my orange juice(saft)

but it turns out they just left it outta fridge all day

fuck it, it’s my only beverage

what doesn't kill me.....hopefully won’t actually kill me, eventually...and even so, let it not happen all at once, let it be gradual.

that’s the pansy, neurotic semi jew version of a once semi badass quote. the quotes not accurate by the way, sometimes what doesn't kill you, just damages you permanently, imprinting scars that will never heal, and by making you stronger it means hardened to the world, dead inside, and never trusting anyone again

militia pax

Didn’t see the super moon

The closest it will be for some time. Bad angle

Angel

Run away until the weeping willow becomes a story

Heart can be found in any of the following places:

A school bus, a synagogue, a loverly embrace, a burden

Hate can also be found there

Drinking half and half with a touch of water

Not good

This is not good, but it really kind of is

Salty and creamy

That’s how the past feels, and also that salty caramel ice-cream that’s all the rage

Love the sound of a quiet house, so calming

When you don’t want anyone to wake, and quite logically someone should be awake, and maybe someone even is but you can’t actually hear them yet, like your headspace is in a bubble of blinding satiated grandness, absorbed in its own spitting world of personal things, so loud it’s empty, so nothing it’s loud, and you just lie there, listening, dreaming awake so that the silence will never break. Those marvelous moments,

This is such a joy,

Make the most of nothing

Things may still disappoint you though, can’t say that they won’t. Happiness should be achieved within reason, just slips out of grasp at times, the human in us, but there is no time for that, there are other things to be done still.

The time has come, for action, my foes, mostly, but they really will be friends, we’ve been pinned against one another for too long. I dream of greatness. But not when I sleep. Even when people are trying to stop the downward spiral, there’s rarely things ahead in mind, solutions but no way to fight the forces that are trained to block implementation, but keep saying things are looking up and perhaps it will become true. People are changing; they have to change, for action’s sake.

As recent as today and we’re all searching for the answers, but leaving no time to actually find them

There is trouble coming, you, everyone. No one is prepared and no one has all the answers because we are forced to deal with the future, when there’s a future you plan. There is no plan here, this is complacency, this is self-destructive, this is acceptance of doom.

The shift is also upon us however. The predicted end times came and went and there was a motion emotion set in motion, efforts made, those who care, those whose concerns grow by the hurricane, by the politician, by the shooting, by the sinkhole, by the real love becoming ugly, not by the episode, or new gadge, or self-absorbed day wasting.

But this isn’t about those things which separate us; our fate will be determined by what we do now, in this very moment in time, because nothing has ever been like this before... not as many people, not as much carbon, not as much unknown. There are no second chances, there is no backup, there is only the decision we make, to care or give up, to live or to die. This is the mother fucking tipping point everyone.

Why be uncomfortable if what we have now is so easy

Why look for another way when what we have now is already a path directed, a wheel on a downhill, so natural, falling but we can count on the way it moves, not where it’s headed

Outside the lavender dunes, a case of mirage waits for them

The chosen one doesn’t speak anymore

Everyone was concerned for a while but then forget to ask about it, as pawns eventually do

Royal hardships grind against and with

Local foibles and transient dumpsters

Wasted and tragictable but fighting nothingness, upset about the things that are said can’t be changed

Say something you know isn’t true but ask yourself to believe it

Have you ever put a smiley face after a statement while you were crying? I’ve already done it on facebook this afternoon

Jokes, to make someone smile and laugh, heart setting, live for this rushing reward

But Maybe, not all is set. stones break and cement is molded into liquid and made anew once more

Or something like that process, don’t really understand the fundamentals. It just dries right?

Who for you is blue not true not I or you could ever skew what sat before the evening dew

Don’t do what we should, laughing like the logs, turn up to see what always missed itself and blankness reined once more, what would bring the lone loneliness back to life. Connections grave. Same mistakes, different cave. Burning greed, fancy luck, breaking down, please give a fuck

And it’s sad it’s come to this point, and no one really wanted to deal with this and it would be great to be happy and carefree and with a future of security and maintainable progress ahead. Maybe you were poor, but perhaps you would rise up one day, and it was enough to just have nothing and struggle to eat and have your kids eat and that would be all you ever had to worry about and all you needed was some money to get it done.

But that isn’t going to be good enough anymore, just gmo-ed food with a glass of fracked water, we all have to stand up and rise to this monster

Look in and beyond ourselves in any way we can, even banking on the crushing crutch of religion, and stand together

To fight this apathy, fight our ways; fight that beast that takes everything of value out of life, fight to fill it with love

We fight to preserve, to maintain, we fight for the future because we are the ones who haven’t given up. We can’t avoid this fight any longer and it’s the only one we must win, the fight for survival reigns high in skies of lies(and chem trails). We will fight because we must, and we must fight because this truly is a fight, the one of our bodies and souls, battles to be won and we must win them every time, we will fight now for everything, for life, for this gift we’ve been given, for freedom from what we have become, for what we could be, we will do this, us, the peace warriors, the militia pax.

obsessively obsessed

2 days of static to numb a soul

How weak it must have been

Sleeping while the blanket breaks

Cold is just like hot

everything derived from its own definition

obsession is nature when you’re buried high enough to scream

the real is twisted

what do the grown children believe

lies woven so deeply who remembers what they saw

how are you today?

Who are you today

Beat up and knocked down

The strong carry on

By escaping humanity

British culture 107

Oh well, that’s alright then innit

Learn what you think you can keep but don’t try to saved what was borrowed

Happiness from suffering

Being needed, being needy

What does it mean about the one who suffers?

Taking risks even though there is less left in ending’s coffin

There is always something to lose

What’s gained remains, stings, don’t it

Can’t commit

Don’t know what it means

Resigning to the same

You know there’s more but you bet it all on a one trick pony

To be loved, yet scorned

The noises dulled and lulled

And things were far simpler this way

Nothing released

An icicle waiting to break

Where did you go?

It was there without us and it will be again

Go away you

To where? With whom?

The silence maddened the unsavory crowd to the point of shredded ectasy, lingering in the fall of nothing’s cousin

A relation is more than its transformation

Become your own illusion

Let us go the nothings pleaded

But go the way I want you to and Spend eternity looking back

idiots, all of us

Pettiness, through and through

But what else was there to do

on a potentially pleasant afternoon

The tides of pulsing daggers mix in the emotionless sea

She does not care what becomes of you

Only you may

And even that is up for debate

Everything that changes is supposed to

But paying careful attention yields exhaustion.

Sometimes they remain neglected

Who pays the price for these misteps?

What price you pay for stagnation,

Idiots, all of us, or so we could finally claim

Wasted and forever tarnished the seeds of a generation without much to say, and even less ways to say it, and even less means to be heard

We don’t want to hear about corruption and greed today

My darling just got a promotion.

Before you defend yourself think what there is to defend and then why you immediately feel the urge to do so without thinking that first part through, then go back to the former. Rinse soul and repeat. This sounds tedious. Don’t bother, probably

So much to learn, less to retain

Can it be done?

We shall see ourselves or nothing

Los Angeles

My first night swallows me. Exhausting dreams about going back and forth and all around city and work and lived 100 days that were about to happen in one. Well I thought it was the whole night. Turns out it was like an hour. Olivia came back and woke me with neighbors and caesar, guy who looks and sounds exactly like Julian Casablanca. I feel something close to immediate acceptance, working way less hard for props and friendship and respect. People seem to not judge, or judge, but are publically very nice, but why bother praising me if you think I’m shit? Just politely ignore me. I think there is an obligation to say something sweet, fakely, for that is far more pleasant and less awk, kind of like the south. I also think they feel things intensely, usually hastened by consuming alcohol. Caesar plays, I talk to strangers, we dance, and I ride the high of my dream like a wave of thrilling nausa.

The bus is full of ambition and heartache. Homeless people with bags of plastic and cans, suitcases full of their lives and nowhere to go. Will they just be riding for the night or is there a destination? They know just as much as us all and yet we call them the confused ones. The sweet eyed musician with a beautiful guitar, kindly picking up things old people drop, the long haired Asian with incredibly tight pants. I don’t know how he is walking and I am in awe. The guy with the headphones who keeps looking up at me, or maybe I am at him. His hoody shimmers and I’m positive matches his shoes. The islander with tribal tri fold burn tattoo, the irritated black girl who is already tired of it all, she’s seen this all before and another unimpressive day goes by in unimpressed anger. Everyone has life inside and I want to wrap them all up, maybe feast in them spiritually, send out excitement or wonderment vibes. They are heading to bigger things, captured in places and cycles; there is only possibility ahead. We journey together and there’s nothing less to feel, nothing more to overlook.

My first Friday night in L.A. I slept then watched the original 1989 teen witch. Never had so much fun doing so little

Another bus scene:

Man in a wheelchair is coughing all over the bus, pretty sure he’s splitting on anyone close enough to him, he keeps elbowing people, and almost gets into fist fight with large Spanish speaking man. The fight would have been disgracefully unmatched, and once realizing this fully, the able bodied man heads to the back. The bound man eventually is recognized by the friendliest happy man alive. “What’s happening in the city of Los Angeles tonight?” I’m shocked to see the angry wheelchair attempt to maintain somewhat of a convo with this refined, loud specimen above him, but he mostly groans and grunts and his animated counterpart enjoys life, feeding from the energy of the younger, more attractive soul findings around him. The man with rags steps aboard is having a full conversation ( I thought he was the phone first 2 minutes) with himself, with the correct pausing periods and all. He is telling fantastical stories about jewel heists and going to elaborate balls. Wasn't clear from his intrigue level whether these tales were false or truth. But he was chatting away, and to himself, so he knew at least one person was listening, so someone would care either way.

Venice beach

Tree man on stilts, last seen following a teenager into a head shop. Spotted later after given giant burning sage by stranger to purify the drum circle; our mission is clear. It’s like an artificial dream, going with the flow but wondering if anything has significance. Will we reefer to these days later in the start of the revolution times? One can hope, but may be dissatisfied. We meet the artist of “funky pussy” painting in our room, he is incoherent at best, but is described by local native American as a meteor, exploding all over town with his energies.

Reach for Yesterday’s Tomorrow

We wait for days we’ll remember forever, passing through those we’re doomed to forget-

How had so much of life's wonderment boiled down to so very little?

The grains of time soaked the muddled,

nothing could be done to stop them.

Who asks a question, tiny girl?

You shouldn’t have remained.

An answer, just out of reach,

grasp with desperate glue.

Everything should be translated into Latin,

so beautiful and harmless,

wasted and dissolving.

Punch the ice and hold the ghost again.

Such a wonderful life is this

who would care to leave?

Presented to us, all picturesque

and all we had to do was look.

There truly is more good than bad here,

more “opportunity” for the delightful to occur-

We should have lived like the animals,

purely survival.

There was a song in her silhouette.

Pass me everything please.

What’s done is done and no one won,

how savagely surreal it seemed.

Inspiration hides in my shadow, scared but silent;

I’d join, but they stand still attached.

Time eases sleep for dreams never end—

If you dream of nothing, you won’t know when you wake.

inspiration(less) nation

That would be a stretch, stretch Armstrong, remember him? And others that form the memories of our generation. These are the things we have to refer to, how do others recall it? “Oh, did you hear that new opera Carmen that just came out, it was pretty good. “These are other times when greatness ruled and inspiration followed. Degrading entertainment equates a dumbed down public, nothing is expected of us so they shovel out the biggest load of crap they will still pass over our hearts and past our brains, little absorbed and even less attained. We should be insulted, but someone must want this, or enough money has been spent to determine what we want, and thus they have become each other.

How can you expect people to ignite themselves when they have nothing to be inspired by around them. There are still heroes, those who live to triumph over the assaulting trials of their time, but they have fallen quiet, mostly arrested quickly, charged with nothing followed by a disappearance. Of course some do not care. The family unit has rendered us lost souls without anything outside ourselves to fight for, nothing overcoming our personal dramas and obligations centered upon what we have created for ourselves, a routine that leaves no room for individual, selfless or free engagement. There is no time for anything else anymore, those hopes and dreams, those causes to fight for, those ethics and ambitions that would have helped us all, made you feel like a human being participating in your surroundings, not isolating yourself from it. They have been replaced by an endless need for things; food, getting food, and a way to dispose of things.

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