random disorganized ramble about the writing discourse on twt just to get it out of my chest HAHAHA
OK SO NOW tho i do believe when ur writing fic, u should be writing mainly for urself, it always feels a bit disingenuous to read when others say to just not care when the fic you've posted is not doing well esp if u've spent a lot of time making it? like yea u should be writing for u bc you want to do it but if you didnt want/care for anyone to engage with it, why post it at all right?ยฟยฟ?? ๐ญ๐ญ maybe its just different strokes for different folks thing. so my personal belief is that if u put something out there for people to see, it also means you want ppl to engage with it so its just normal to feel disappointed when it doesnt get much attention!! its a bit disheartening to see how writers get put down for expressing sadness when their works dont do well when its a normal emotion to feel like omg ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ
besides that, before i was a writer, ive always been first and foremost an avid fic reader for like more than a decade now so even if i wasnt writing, it kinda pisses me off how fic writers are being treated nowadays HAHAHA ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ plus even if i wasnt a writer (pt. 2), ive tried my hand being an artist in fandom and its tbh just the same feeling when the piece u've worked 10hrs on only gets 5 likes. but fsr venting about that gets more support/sympathy, while venting ur fic getting no engagement gets more "just write for yourself!!" rather than actual support n sympathy?? LIKE LOL GET OUTTA HERE IDK ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ฃ๏ธ๐คผ๐คผ๐คผ๐คผ๐คผ๐คผ๐คผ
anyway im just annoyed at the situation itself bc writers shouldnt be getting this much flack just bc theyre disappointed a piece they worked on flopped!!!!!! get off their backs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! its normal to be disappointed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just hope they dont let the low engagement stop them from posting tho, ive had some of my fave fics die that way ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ of which i made a point to comment even on old ass fics and to like, comment again when i reread them bc writers will not know!!!! you are obsessed with their fic!!!!!!!!!! unless you tell them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im saying this as a reader btw!!!!!!!!! show ur fave writer love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bc god if i only were rich i wouldve built my fave writers a statue made out of gold just to have them come back like FUCK PLEASE COME BACK ๐๐๐๐ I WILL DIE FOR YOUR FIC PLS ๐๐๐๐๐๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ ๐ซ ykw while writing this maybe ill send a follow up msg again to one of them why the fuck not. ill go pick up the fic i remember liking best in UT back then too so like everyone go read Our Place Among The Stars by WisteriaSky i remember being so willing to die for this back then and though i dont rmmbr much of what it was about now (bc i have shitty memory its not the fic's fault!!!!) i remember loving this to BITS ok!!!! i also rmmbr my heart DROPPING WHEN I SAW IT WAS SCHEDULED FOR DELETION LIKE WHAT THE HELL GOOD GOD AUTHORNIM DONT DO THAT ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ I MEAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT BUT I WILL BE SO SAD LIKE ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ anyway they decided not do that at the end so yey hehe <3
ANYWAY if anyone cares (/gen /lh), dont worry about me btw bc i do think ive done well for my first time posting, the situation just annoyed me HAHAHA ๐ซ ๐ซ even if like my engagement is objectively less than the other fics in our fandom, im actually satisfied bc ive never expected this much ppl to read it esp since,,,, well i posted around 40k words at the start with literally no audience and just throwing my fic into the void HAHAHAHAHA plus im quite aware that there's a practice with a handful that doesnt read longfics, esp those over 100k while under a certain kudo/hits/whateverisms threshold (which i do not agree with at all btw LOL) so ive already come to terms that my habit of rambling n reaching 7-10k words per chapter is definitely gonna work against me at some point HAHAHA
ill take advantage of this moment to thank those that are constantly sooo supportive of me tho like!!!!!! i admit im writing this bc i personally want to see my work into fruition but i would not be writing this much if it werent for ur comments!!!!!!!!!!! like ch1-3 w/ 40k words was literally simmering for years in my google drive since ~2020 but in like less in a year once i posted it this 2026, the support had motivated me sm that we're literally at ch10 next chap at over 120k words like dats insane HAHAHA i want to drop names but girl nakakahiya kc tangina k feeling close parasocial kilig yorn HAHHAHAHAJSHSJ (/pos) just know i remember the usernames that regularly comment and i always get so excited to read them ๐ฅฐ๐ฅฐ๐ฅฐ๐ฅฐ๐ฅฐ ok but tho i feel awkward dropping all the names here, there is an exception and hi cherry!!!!!HAHAHHAHAHAHA fsr i think u would read up to this point (sue me if not, tho its still ok if u didnt anyway LOL) and just know i love u i appreciate u w my entire heart u r one of my main motivators to continue writing my fic and im always SO excited to hear what u have in mind i hope u always have the best days!!!!!! ๐๐๐๐๐
ANYWAY im not mad anymore wow writing ur feelings down really works #therapy #journalling #mentalhealth #happypride im going to sleep na ๐๐๐๐ but damn u read allat?? u get a star โญ
