Pregnancy
2. The first three months (first trimester) presented me with endless nausea and fatigue. Every morning I would run to the bathroom but nothing would happen, I would return to bed and by the time my alarm clock goes off I’d be exhausted. I’d go to work; I’d work hard no matter what. Then at home when it’s just Pete, me and our dog I’d spend the rest of the day either on the bed or our couch, with occasional trips to the bathroom and to the kitchen to get some water (have to stay hydrated!). I did what I could to try to help out Pete with chores around the house but I really was not very helpful, so it was time for him to get tired and upset with me. He did. He’d go to work, come back and do dishes, clean bathrooms etc. We would have “a talk” once in a while trying to get to a common ground, to get to the same page but it would only help for a short term. Somehow we made it through the 1st trimester.
Second trimester was easier. I felt almost like myself again. There was enough energy to help out Pete around the house, to go to work and maybe drive to a grocery store. If I could talk to someone who is or about to get pregnant I would suggest to do as many enjoyable things during the 2nd trimester as possible! You will regret if you don’t! There will be no time nor energy to do all those things afterwards! Trust me! Oh, and SEX is one of those things! Later on you’d grow bigger and it will become more challenging but still doable, just a heads-up. So, please enjoy that time.
Third trimester was almost as bad as the first one for me. My old friend, fatigue, came back to me and brought some more negativity with him. It was negativity and dissatisfaction with my own body. Much bigger body than the one I’ve had all my life. It was a revelation to me. So many mixed feelings. First of all, I knew I was beautiful just because I was carrying a baby under my heart. That big belly of mine was a sign of miracle, a sign of new life, and I was proud of myself for bringing that life into our World! But there was also the “second of all”: I began to question my husband’s desire for being close to me, for his attraction to my body. I know it now it wasn’t Pete’s fault that he stopped showing signs of attraction to me in a sexual way. As he told me later, he thought I didn’t want to have sex because I was big and uncomfortable. You know what? Pete was right about that but he missed one thing. He didn’t notice that I was closing out from Everything not just sex. I started to have a complex which grew bigger day by day. But my advice to those who’s going through that stage in their life. Don’t feel sorry for yourself, stick with the Good, with the thought of Miracle and don’t let yourself or anybody else bring you down! Talk to your husband/wife/partner, let them know how you feel, don’t be afraid to seem weak. I assure you, you are the strongest woman out there, you are going through all these crazy ass changes that men wouldn’t have been able to go through and not to go insane! You go girl! You deserve something good! Treat yourself to a spa (while you still can)!