night journal

May || she/her || 18

[minniebbang]

Thought I might love you again, see how I feel

Now you're acting like that, I never will

˚☽˚.⋆ may (she/her) — 20 — sfw contents! (but please read the warning before hand)

.☘︎ ݁˖library account (@jisurary), side account 🍉( @staaalost )

Semi-hiatus!

⋆.𐙚 ̊ Taglist is open!

Divider by: @cursed-carmine

[minniebbang]

On that note...why are there so many alpha and beta thingy in biochemistry??? My brain is gonna twist all the terms now🫠🫠

[minniebbang]

Adore u (remember me like this) | L.Felix

pairing: student!Felix x student!fem!reader summary: You adore your boyfriend so much, but never say it out loud. Even if it was the last time you saw him. word counts: 1.4k words genre: fluff(?) for the sake of not spoiling the ending, I won't say anything further. a/n: Soo this is one of the fics that were born from reading Hana's fics (@imfoive). Wrote this while studying for my final, and the moon was so pretty that night that I had to write something about it. I hope this fics make sense? Cause this is kinda words vomit. I'm gonna hate myself if this is nonsense

Cheers and cries blended in the background, and yet the sound of the ball thumping against the field was all that echoed in your ears. Your gaze followed his zooming silhouette as he dunked the ball into the hoop. His creased forehead immediately evened out, and a cheerful grin broke out when one of his teammates ruffled his blonde hair. 

The game continued, even though the school was slowly emptied as another group of students pulled away from their hugs, bidding their goodbyes to each other and to the end of their high school era. You stayed seated on the bench, hands gripping the camcorder, as you watched the late evening rays catch his bouncing blonde hair, causing it to glimmer like gold. 

His smile, which grew wider when he laid his eyes on you behind the lenses, had your heart scavenging for its normal rate again. The small but soft laughter that escaped him swelled your heart in adoration to the point of no turning back and almost shattering it. Hearing it from afar was enough to colour your cheeks ‌a vivid red hue. 

“Alright, let’s stop here everyone,” Hyunjin shouted, clapping his hands as everyone gathered around him. What he said next was a wave of incoherent voices because your attention was on him–on your lovely boyfriend.

“You look like a stalker, love,” the voice suddenly said. The frame turned pitch black. You blinked before raising your chin, eyes colliding with his warm ones. A tender smile spread across your lips, and you stopped the recording, closing the screen carefully. 

“A proud one at that. Isn't it wrong to be a stalker of my boyfriend? You're pretty, Lixie. Like the sunset,” You tilted your head. Felix chuckled lightly, kissing your forehead intently, as if saying it was fine to your question. It felt like the only thing that fueled you was his overflowing love. It was filling every nook and cranny of your body.

A gentle breeze blew when he pulled away, sticking his damp hair everywhere on his forehead. Standing up, your fingers gently tugged his long locks behind his ear. And he just watched, getting drowned in your gentle love–the only thing he didn’t mind getting drowned in, even if it turned him blue. His ear was slowly becoming red.

Your gaze was fond when he stared at it, chest tight as he wondered how he got so lucky to call you his. He hoped it would stay like that forever.  

“Let’s head back” You laced your hand with his, grabbing your and his backpack by your feet, but he shook his head.

“But I’m sweaty”

“Don’t mind,” You simply shrugged your shoulders and tugged him to follow you. He yelled his goodbyes, eliciting laughter from his friends. While walking to his bicycle, he snatched his backpack from your hand, lips pouting, complaining that being too good could hurt you in the future.

And somehow you didn’t mind getting hurt if it was for him. 

He unlocked the pad and sat at the front, and you settled in the back. You wrapped your arm around his waist as he took off from the school. 

The streetlights started coming to life, illuminating the dimming street and accompanying the shadows cast on the pavement. 

You tightened your hold on his waist as the bicycle went down a slope, pressing your cheek on his back. The grip continued to hold firm after that. Faint flower scents from the remnant of his cologne wafted through the air, reminding you of the school's past flower festival. The festival where you started writing your love story with Felix.

His white school shirt quickly crumbled in your hand as realisation dawned on you. His apartment was within your vision and in a blink, he’d already stopped padding.

He turned to you, lips tight. Felix carefully stepped down, planting the brake on the ground. You immediately took the front seat.

“Before you go…” He unzipped his bag and fumbled with the contents. Finally, he pulled out a small box and handed it to you.

You glanced at it, mouth agape. Felix took your palm and placed the box in it. Your eyes flickered to him in hesitation, as if asking for permission.

“Open it, love”

With an exhale, you took off the cover, and inside was a silver bracelet with a full moon charm. Under it, tucked a small folded note.

He took the bracelet and clasped the lock around your wrist carefully. Clasping your hand, he looked at you, a storm cloud lingered behind his orbs.

“Read the letter when you miss me, okay? I don't know how long I’ll be in Australia, so take care of yourself for me” He smiled sincerely, his freckles seemed to light up like a constellation. 

Something tugged the string of your heart, draining the previous joy from you. The bicycle fell to the ground with a dull thud as soon as you crushed yourself into him, hugging him as if your life depended on it. 

A lump formed in your throat. Something blurred your vision that was buried in his shirt.

“Don't leave me, Lix.” Your voice trembled as tears soaked his shirt. His chest fell with a heavy sigh; his arm cradled you. 

“I’m not leaving you forever, love. I’ll be back, promise!” He uttered cheerfully, but it sounded forced. There was uncertainty lying behind his voice—a tight smile on his face.

Your sobs suddenly grew louder and louder.

…like you were grieving. 

As if your heart were being peeled apart, layer by layer. Each layer was bloodier than before. 

It was…

Painful? No, it was more than that.

It felt like you were on the verge of death.

Your throat turned sandy as you clenched his shirt, memorising how his warmth and cologne wrapped around you like a blanket. How he rested his chin on your head as he swung side to side slowly. 

How he felt under your touch. 

How his hugs felt like home.

How…he felt so real.

“I’ll miss you, Lix” You shut your eyes, wishing this moment would stay a beat longer.

“I’ll miss you too, love”

Your eyes fluttered open, and your back was aching in pain. The curtain beside you was billowing under the calm night breeze, tickling your cheeks and allowing the moonlight to slip inside. 

You blinked, your body straightened as you glanced around. Under the little light that the moon provided, you could recognise your plushies resting against the pillow and a random anime poster on the wall beside the bed. There were boxes on the floor, their contents scattered around—Polaroid pictures, a chick plushie, a diary, and other things that were covered by the darkness.

….your room? Why were you here? 

Your cheeks were damp. Why were you crying?

Where is Felix? Shouldn’t he be by your side?

Shifting your gaze, you noticed you were holding a camcorder. Pushing the screen open, the blank screen blinked alive, and a video of Felix playing basketball started playing.

It was the same scenario that you—

Dreamed? Experienced? You weren't sure anymore.

You placed the camcorder aside, finally realising the numbness in your arm. Massaging it gently, a memory flickered inside your head. 

Your hand immediately halted.

Oh…

The room suddenly closed up around you when you heard the news anchor’s voice from 2 years ago echo in your ears.

Yesterday, the airplane, which was to bring 250 passengers to Australia, sank into the sea. They estimate the accident happened around midnight. Let us pause, remembering the victims.

…And lastly, Lee Felix”

Your heart's wound reopened its bleeding. His last gift was adorning your wrist, and it never left your wrist since then.

Your eyes stung as tears began to build. If you had the chance, you would trade your soul to see him again.

“I missed you, Lix”

You caught a folded paper tucked on the camcorder holder; it was waving slightly at you, urging you to take it. And you did.

The last letter from Felix. The letter that you received on your last day of high school.

The day that you last saw him standing in front of you. Eyes crinkling into a crescent with a wide smile tugged at his face. 

If you miss me,

Push the curtain out of your vision,

And look at the bright moon,

At how the stars are dancing around the shining satellite,

And remember nothing but happiness,

Remember my smile, my laughter,

How red I was when our hands brushed together,

How messy I was every time you leaned in to kiss me,

I hope it’ll illuminate the dark sky,

Like how you lightened mine

But love, promise me something,

Promise me you wouldn't cry every time you look at the moon,

Promise me you won't grieve every time you remember me,

I’ll be watching you from above, my sunshine

Oh! I have a taglist!! Btw, this poem came first before the story :]

Taglist: @thebibleophile @jisunggy

[minniebbang]

Random reblog because I was listening to adore u and randomly remembered this story

[minniebbang]

Currently writing a story with this vibe

Can you guess who's the pairing is?? I don't think I'll post this story in here (If it's done) :((

[minniebbang]

This is a lil sneak peek of this story

“Seungmin…”

He immediately lifted his head upon hearing the soft voice, heart hammering in his chest. That sounds like…his neighbour. His eyes shifted to his right, where he heard the voice, but only the field of tall grasses was waving at him. The leafless tree in the center seemed to stare intently at him, watching how every bone in Seungmin’s body quivered.

“Seungmin, help!”

The sound grew, its volume increased.

That’s not possible.

It couldn’t be Jeongin’s voice.

His breath stuttered, and a dry lump began blocking his windpipe.

Jeongin’s house, which was beside his house…had burned down last night. He and Felix saw it, how they flickered the match off their grip, how the bright orange fire slowly swallowed the house, wood by wood. Seungmin remembered how tightly he clasped his hand over Felix’s mouth as the blonde mourned in his embrace, his figure trembling violently.

He remembered he tightened the hold around Felix when his own tears fell on Felix’s hair.

They burned Jeongin's house.

They burned Jeongin and Chan.

They killed them while they were sleeping.

They…the Visitor

[minniebbang]

I'm sorry if there is not update/new story coming out lately. I'm been pretty busy this month since my semester is ending pretty soon :/

[minniebbang]

Dry paint & kisses | H.Hyunjin (a collection of drabble)

pairing : Husband!Hyunjin x fem!reader summary: dim light cast over the living room, accompanying his lone figure as he waited for his wife to return home Word counts: 0.8k words Genre: fluff A/n: remember that one fic that I say I will post?? This is it. Please forgive me for taking such a long time to post this.

“I’m home”, Muttering to no one other than yourself, you placed your sandals along the row of other shoes.

The living room was bathed in soft gold from the lightstand, unlike the other areas of the house that were dimmed with darkness. A quiet hum from the refrigerator stood in the empty air, accompanying the lone air conditioner. And amidst the silence, a figure sat on the couch, head resting against the concrete wall.

Your steps halted when you saw him, and a thin smile bloomed. Approaching quietly, you set your laptop bag on the coffee table and sat beside him, movement quiet as a mouse, as if a small sound could rip the ambience apart.

“Hyun?” You whispered, head tilting. Eyes closed, lips slightly parted as another low exhale slipped out of them, his chest raising and falling in slow rhythm. The breeze from the air conditioner brushed his recently washed hair away from his face.

Of course, he wouldn’t answer you.

He looked like a baby without those creases on his forehead—creases that appeared every time a problem crashed into his gallery like uninvited guests.

Resting your head beside him on the wall, your hand slowly reached for his hair to tug it behind his ear, touch feather-light and soft like cradling a newborn. Your heart began to clench relentlessly for him, the overwhelming adoration and love for him suddenly became too much for you to bear. And you were sure, Hyunjin felt the same way sometimes.

Your gaze fell to his hand, where a brush (the end was still wet from the blue paint) was loosely held, his delicate and long fingers were coated with paint. The wet substance was on its way to hardening around his fingers.

“I’m sorry for coming home late” Your smile faded as you laced your hand with his gently, guilt nibbling into your skin. It’s been a while since you got promoted, so coming back home early was far from your boss’s liking.

Sure, being promoted was a good thing…but was it worth it if you had to reject Hyunjin’s lunch invitation every day?

Shifting closer to him, you muttered, “I hope this won’t stay for too long.” You leaned in, kissing both of his cheeks; each kiss lasted for a moment as if to convey the unspoken longing you hadn’t dared to speak.

“I miss you.” Another kiss was planted on his forehead carefully. His face scrunched up, and a low whimper escaped him; the infamous creases made their appearance for a split second. You stopped, waiting for him to calm down again before landing your lips on his nose–the spot that always evoked small and endearing giggles out of him.

Your eyes somehow found themselves on his lips, and your heart picked up its pace, rebelling from staying put in your ribcage. You couldn’t kiss his lips right now because that would wake him up, and…you would never be the one who initiated a kiss. It was always him.

Maybe you were scared it would make him uncomfortable or awkward—or maybe that was what your overthinking mind came up with every time Hyunjin leaned in (anyways, that wasn’t worth mentioning because it wouldn’t change anytime soon).

But tonight, those thoughts didn’t lurk in your mind. Gripping the sofa’s pillow, the space between you and him shrank, and your lips were hovering over his, his breath fanning your burning cheeks. You shut your eyes, grasping every ounce of bravery inside of you and kiss the edge of his lips.

Suddenly, a hand shot up and wrapped around your arm. You let out a sharp gasp and immediately jerked away.

“You’re home…” He said, voice stuck between disbelief and joy—but something was sure, his voice was dripping with exhaustion and sleep. You glanced at him, blinking rapidly before settling beside him quickly—your throat was filled with embarrassment.

You threw your gaze toward the kitchen, hands fiddling in your laps, while he stretched his sore neck.

“Hey,” He nudged your shoulder, again and again, until you looked at him, red-hued cheeks for him to witness. A small smile grazed his lips as his arm landed around your waist, pulling you closer to his body. His head rested on your shoulder.

“Welcome home, baby. I miss you a lot. I thought you already cheated on me with your office. That place get more of your attention than me,” He murmured, words almost incoherent as he dozed off multiple times while talking.

That alone managed to stifle a short snort out of you.

“I’m sorry, baby”

“Mhmm, don’t want to hear that. Just want you close to me tonight,” He hummed and dropped his body to the sofa, dragging you with him. Before you could resist, he tightened his grip around you, hiding his face in your chest.

“Hyun, I need to take a shower first”

“Do it tomorrow. I suffer enough from sleep deprivation because you weren’t beside me” Another mumble as sleepiness slowly crawled back into him. Shaking your head, you ran your hand through his locks, untangling the knot and gently pressing his scalp. He hummed in content, burying his face deeper into your chest.

“Don’t go anywhere, baby” His whisper trailed to nothingness, and you nodded, aware that he didn’t see it.

“I won’t.”

Taglist: @thebibleophile @jisunggy

Main masterlist

[minniebbang]

Thank you for 100+ notes ✨✨🫠

[minniebbang]

Anyway, the competition is making me soooo nervous although I'm not the one who is doing the acting—

[yedeong]

LIA | KPOP ON

[minniebbang]

❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

[minniebbang]

Y'know, I just realised how fun it is to write fanfic together with fellow writers in the community. It's like, you keep hype each other up and surprise each other with what you write and what you come up with. And when the fic is done, it feels hard to let go—difficult to put 'the end' into the fic because you were having so much fun writing it (despite the hugeeeee gap in the time zone)

So, thank youuu Ari @angelwings-fly for making one of my dreams come true!

[thegrayelephent]

Me when I write for 30 minutes: 1k words

Me when I write for 2 hours: 500 words

Me when I write for 4 hours: -300 words

[minniebbang]

Haihh🫠🫠🫠

[minniebbang]

Currently writing a story with this vibe

Can you guess who's the pairing is?? I don't think I'll post this story in here (If it's done) :((

[jace-targaryen]

CHAERYEONG ⦮ ⦯ 'ROCK & ROLL' in tokyo

[minniebbang]

Pretty pretty girl ✨🫠

[seungminogie]

🐶 smiles 44-55/∞

[minniebbang]

💔💔💔🫠🫠

[minniebbang]

Dry paint & kisses | H.Hyunjin (a collection of drabble)

pairing : Husband!Hyunjin x fem!reader summary: dim light cast over the living room, accompanying his lone figure as he waited for his wife to return home Word counts: 0.8k words Genre: fluff A/n: remember that one fic that I say I will post?? This is it. Please forgive me for taking such a long time to post this.

“I’m home”, Muttering to no one other than yourself, you placed your sandals along the row of other shoes.

The living room was bathed in soft gold from the lightstand, unlike the other areas of the house that were dimmed with darkness. A quiet hum from the refrigerator stood in the empty air, accompanying the lone air conditioner. And amidst the silence, a figure sat on the couch, head resting against the concrete wall.

Your steps halted when you saw him, and a thin smile bloomed. Approaching quietly, you set your laptop bag on the coffee table and sat beside him, movement quiet as a mouse, as if a small sound could rip the ambience apart.

“Hyun?” You whispered, head tilting. Eyes closed, lips slightly parted as another low exhale slipped out of them, his chest raising and falling in slow rhythm. The breeze from the air conditioner brushed his recently washed hair away from his face.

Of course, he wouldn’t answer you.

He looked like a baby without those creases on his forehead—creases that appeared every time a problem crashed into his gallery like uninvited guests.

Resting your head beside him on the wall, your hand slowly reached for his hair to tug it behind his ear, touch feather-light and soft like cradling a newborn. Your heart began to clench relentlessly for him, the overwhelming adoration and love for him suddenly became too much for you to bear. And you were sure, Hyunjin felt the same way sometimes.

Your gaze fell to his hand, where a brush (the end was still wet from the blue paint) was loosely held, his delicate and long fingers were coated with paint. The wet substance was on its way to hardening around his fingers.

“I’m sorry for coming home late” Your smile faded as you laced your hand with his gently, guilt nibbling into your skin. It’s been a while since you got promoted, so coming back home early was far from your boss’s liking.

Sure, being promoted was a good thing…but was it worth it if you had to reject Hyunjin’s lunch invitation every day?

Shifting closer to him, you muttered, “I hope this won’t stay for too long.” You leaned in, kissing both of his cheeks; each kiss lasted for a moment as if to convey the unspoken longing you hadn’t dared to speak.

“I miss you.” Another kiss was planted on his forehead carefully. His face scrunched up, and a low whimper escaped him; the infamous creases made their appearance for a split second. You stopped, waiting for him to calm down again before landing your lips on his nose–the spot that always evoked small and endearing giggles out of him.

Your eyes somehow found themselves on his lips, and your heart picked up its pace, rebelling from staying put in your ribcage. You couldn’t kiss his lips right now because that would wake him up, and…you would never be the one who initiated a kiss. It was always him.

Maybe you were scared it would make him uncomfortable or awkward—or maybe that was what your overthinking mind came up with every time Hyunjin leaned in (anyways, that wasn’t worth mentioning because it wouldn’t change anytime soon).

But tonight, those thoughts didn’t lurk in your mind. Gripping the sofa’s pillow, the space between you and him shrank, and your lips were hovering over his, his breath fanning your burning cheeks. You shut your eyes, grasping every ounce of bravery inside of you and kiss the edge of his lips.

Suddenly, a hand shot up and wrapped around your arm. You let out a sharp gasp and immediately jerked away.

“You’re home…” He said, voice stuck between disbelief and joy—but something was sure, his voice was dripping with exhaustion and sleep. You glanced at him, blinking rapidly before settling beside him quickly—your throat was filled with embarrassment.

You threw your gaze toward the kitchen, hands fiddling in your laps, while he stretched his sore neck.

“Hey,” He nudged your shoulder, again and again, until you looked at him, red-hued cheeks for him to witness. A small smile grazed his lips as his arm landed around your waist, pulling you closer to his body. His head rested on your shoulder.

“Welcome home, baby. I miss you a lot. I thought you already cheated on me with your office. That place get more of your attention than me,” He murmured, words almost incoherent as he dozed off multiple times while talking.

That alone managed to stifle a short snort out of you.

“I’m sorry, baby”

“Mhmm, don’t want to hear that. Just want you close to me tonight,” He hummed and dropped his body to the sofa, dragging you with him. Before you could resist, he tightened his grip around you, hiding his face in your chest.

“Hyun, I need to take a shower first”

“Do it tomorrow. I suffer enough from sleep deprivation because you weren’t beside me” Another mumble as sleepiness slowly crawled back into him. Shaking your head, you ran your hand through his locks, untangling the knot and gently pressing his scalp. He hummed in content, burying his face deeper into your chest.

“Don’t go anywhere, baby” His whisper trailed to nothingness, and you nodded, aware that he didn’t see it.

“I won’t.”

Taglist: @thebibleophile @jisunggy

Main masterlist

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

[minniebbang]

Honestly...I'm guilty — I'm the fourth guy

[minniebbang]

Anywho, my sleeping schedule is gone :> might as well as posting something tonight maybe...

[minniebbang]

Might post smthg today...maybeee