The one and only Misandry Theme Park

All the fun of the unfair

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The Burning Man Festival Slides

How many burning men can you spot trying to escape from the flames?

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Apologies for the rides being closed this past week.

We’ve been busy with real life. Photoshop will be fired up soon, more Fun of the Unfair is on its way!

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The Hall of Smile, Please.

This attraction is dedicated to menz who tell women what to do with their faces.

Imagine being so fragile that your feelings are upset by a complete stranger minding their own business and their own face, and you being compelled to tell them to smile so that YOU can feel better.

Only £1 (payable by the menz) to be forced into an attractive fish hook smile. Unlimited free fish hooks. Mirrors on every wall so that they can see how much better they look when they are forced to smile against their will.

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INFORMATION: MISANDRY DODGEMS

Imagine this. A gentle sunny day that is not too hot so that people don’t melt like the Nazi in Raiders of The Lost Ark. The beautifully pearlescent pillar box red finish on the dodgems glints in the afternoon sun. Passengers begin to swirl and dodge about, except the object of the game here is not really to dodge. IT IS TO COLLIDE.

Affixed to the front of each glorious car, is a naked man. He is positioned like the Spirit of Ecstasy on the front of a Rolls Royce vehicle, and we have dubbed them THE SPIRIT OF TOXIC MASCULINITY. Here at the Misandry Theme Park, we are very selective with whom we position on our dodgems. These men are likely some of the worst society has to offer, misogynist and racist red faced gammon types who usually spend their time yelling at anyone and anything that doesn’t fit in with their white nationalist, homophobic, transphobic, and woman hating narrative. 

With each collision, an appropriate phrase screeches from within the dodgem to further vex the spirits, such as “I’M NOT RACIST BUT”, “MUSLAIMIC RAY GUNS”, “BUT HER EMAILS”, “I CAN’T BE RACIST MY BEST FRIEND IS GAY”, “FAKE NEWS!”, “GAMMON IS A RACIST SLUR!”  “NOT ALL MEN!” and other appropriate soundbites.  

Your goal is to knock as many spirits from opposing dodgems as possible. Whomever knocks the most spirits off, wins a lovely prize.

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Welcome to our newest attraction.

The Fedora the Explorer Experience. Fedoras from past victims have been hidden in a muddy field and your pet MRA has to find them. Should he mutter, “I can’t do this, m’lady” you should push him face first down back into the field until he collects his prize.

Credit to lovely man, David, who wanted a Fedora the Exploter ride but I’m not awake enough to photoshop that yet. Coming soon!

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Are you bored with your man interrupting you to explain what you already know?

Bring him to our Well, Actually. Your wishes are our pleasure.

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Naturally we would like men to have the chance for a bit of a boogey.

Unfortunately we’re all out of dry ice so decided that car exhaust fumes would be just as pretty.

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The Greenhouse of Discontent.

You can house any annoying menz here for up to and beyond 24 hours. They are bewildered by a PA System treating them the same way that they treat women, and are too scared to leave.

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Fed up with a man constantly popping up to explain something to you?

Us too. Which is why we invented Whack-A-Menz. Please note that this is a staged photo of a menz, not a genuinely injured one. We so far haven’t hurt any men during the construction of the theme park.

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Why be mean to horses when you can add some menz to the carousel?

They also go up and down. Sometimes this makes the menz sick but they all get a good jet wash at closing time if we remember.

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The dodgems!

Nothing like strapping screaming naked menz to the front of cars, a la Rolls Royce Spirit of Esctasy style. My friend, Steve, said it’s now The Spirit of Toxic Masculinity. Thanks, Steve, you are a good man!

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And now, onto the first attraction.

A special event for women to hurl great big dicks at men who tell them they need a bit of dick. We don’t know why men do this, so roll up to see how they like having some dick they didn’t ask for.

Quote from a lovely friend, “Yeah give men a good dicking and see if the magic penis wand fixes their fuckery.“

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An introduction.

We are best friends. We have wonderful and terrible ideas. Whilst mithering about how rubbish some man was being, we hit upon the idea of rubbish men being better utilised in some sort of a theme park enterprise.

Because we have no money, or any willing victims, for the construction of a real theme park, we decided to make our own on here.

Welcome. And remember, no men were injured during the fun of the quite unfair. Except maybe their feelings. If your feelings are hurt, please go and watch Hannah Gadbsy’s Nanette and adjust your thinking cap/fedora.