don't fall in love

Teacher of English Literature at Coal Hill Secondary. Secret baker. Tea connoisseur. Exceedingly clever. Suffering from the Travel Bug since '92. Likes: Warm baths, good books, 80's pop, adventure, Posh Spice, and imparting knowledge on today's youth. Dislikes: Bad listeners, disorder, field trips, cheesy television adverts, and marking.

[poedameroo]

[missbosswald]

fastesttempincoalhill:

“We?” Donna said, half jokingly - but only half. “Don’t you remember the disaster that was our last group trip?” 

She couldn’t help the smile that flickered across her face at the memory, though. “At least it was memorable. Still, the company’s part of the charm, isn’t it?”

“Paris and America?” she raised her eyebrows at Clara’s choice. “I’m sure you’ve been before. How about some place more exotic? Russia? Croatia? Do you keep a list of places you want to go? Because I definitely have a list.”

Oh, right. Last year had been a bit of a disaster, hadn’t it? But that hardly meant this year had to be. She’d grown fond of their group getaways. 

And like Donna said -- at least it was memorable. And charming. 

“Well -- to Paris, yeah  -- not America,” she said, feeling the sudden need to defend herself. But she supposed Donna had a point, exotic could be good. “Haven’t got a list, but I’ve got a book -- 101 places to see. Been marking them off as I go.” 

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

Ahhhh.

Yes. He’d gotten her. Right under his carefully made, happily planted, and deeply rooted plan.

Grinning at her in triumph, the Doctor looked over at the children, who for the most part looked extremely bored, (and he didn’t blame them) before looking back at her. When she dropped his rake (shield) he blinked a few moments and before he could react, she had grabbed him to drag him over to the potted plants.

Oh.

Ohhh. 

No way was Clara Oswald going to win this! Frowning, he quite literally dragged his feet as she began to pull at him. “I think it’s not terribly hard to de-pot a plant and seeing as I’m the instructor in this club, I should be instructing you, not showing you how. There’s a difference, and it’s a big one - so get to taking the plants out of the pots and moving them to soil. Not hard, Clara.”

He all but shook his head at her offer (insistence) to teach him how to treat students like actual people. “They’re children, their brains are wet sponges. Squeeze them enough and everything will just fall out anyway!”

No. 

No no no. 

He was not getting out of this. He was not going to win. Clara Oswald was not bested. Not ever. Even if he had sorted of tricked her into helping out in the first place. She was clever. Really clever. She caught on faster than most. 

Faster than the children who dragged their feet as they followed orders rather than forming a revolt. 

The man was good. 

Forced smile in place, Clara tightened her grip on the Doctor’s arm -- she’d drag him if she had to, the man was all skin and bones, couldn’t be that hard. “Not the point, Doctor,” she said through clenched teeth, her voice a fake brand of sweet and sugary. “I’m here to help you learn, yeah? Let’s learn.”

She should make him a set of cue cards, save herself some of the dragging him around. 

[missbosswald]

coalhillcounselor:

Missy was bored, which was never a good thing. There was practically nothing to do in this silly little town, nothing compared to what she did in her younger years. That night, instead of curling up on the couch screaming at the idiots on the telly, she had decided she’d head to the local pub. She was sure she’d find someone to pick on there.

To her surprise and delight, she found a familiar face sitting at a booth. The puppy. She was even more surprised when Clara called her over, it wasn’t that Missy had made an enemy of Clara, in fact, she kept her close for a reason, but outside of work she didn’t expect anyone to be interested in her company. Hesitating for only a second, she walked over to the booth and slid in across from the English teacher. “Hello dear.” This would be interesting.

Right. Missy. Maybe not her most conventional choice in drinking companions, but desperate times called for desperate measures. And anyway, when Missy wasn’t playing mind games Clara actually thought she could be kind of... fun. 

Not that she had any intention of letting the counsellor in on that little revelation, mind. Even the smallest bit of information in Missy’s hands could be disastrous. Clara didn’t like things being held over her head.

Still, as far as distractions go, not all bad. 

“Missy,” she greeted, tapping her fingers on the table top idly, “This is a first. Didn’t peg you as the pub sort.”

[missbosswald]

Clara sat in her usual booth at the local, nursing a pint as she stared down the mountain of never-ending short stories she had yet to mark. She should really stop encouraging her students to be so creative. Or maybe she just really needed to drive home the lesson that less is always more. 

Then again, maybe she just needed another drink. And some company. 

“Oi!” Clara shouted, spotting a familiar face at the bar. “You can join me if you like. Could use the distraction.”

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

The Doctor grinned menacingly at Clara, clasping his hands together he gestured around him at all the potted plants. “…Well?” He tilted his head a bit and waited patiently.

“You said you would stick around and help, so, get helping!“ He ushered, glancing at the children.

“Look, even the children are waiting on you, don’t be lazy, Clara!“ He huffed, grabbing his rake and began to point the non-sharp end at her.

Ugh. He’d tricked her. Done quite a good job of it as well. But she could hardly admit it. The only thing worse than being tricked was letting on that she’d been tricked in the first place. Especially by The Doctor. 

He was not winning!

She’d meant to involve herself in an activity she despised. Of course. She’d been meaning to work on her green thumb. 

Clara took a step towards him, eyes narrowing into a threatening glare as he held his rake up to her -- no doubt to stop her from slapping him. Which frankly, he deserved. 

Arse. 

“Yeah, all right,” she agreed, dodging the rake so she might grab hold of his arm. “You teach me the de-potting, and I will teach you how to treat the students like actual people.”

Yeah, definitely not winning. They’d both lose together. 

[missbosswald]

nutloaf:

harknessjack:

Jack frowned more to himself than anyone else as he looked around his immediate space for Clara’s apparently missing papers. “Hm…no… sorry, I haven’t but I’ll help you look.” he raised a brow as he moved from where he was standing beside her and began to rifle through the clutter that decorated the room. “When was the last time you’ve seen them?” He asked, glancing up between two folders.

James hadn’t seen Clara’s marking, and he’d been about to volunteer that information when Jack beat him to it. Then the poor man started to manually rifle through the files and papers, and James decided he couldn’t hold back any longer.

“Are you actually going to search by hand?” he said incredulously. “I have a better idea. I can program Oscar to scan for it.”

She smiled her thanks at Jack -- Mr. Reliable -- if anyone was going to help her find her marking, it was definitely him --

And then James spoke up, and she found herself tensing up, her smile turning more polite than grateful. Sort of forced. He meant well. She knew he meant well. They always did -- James, John... the whole damn family -- that was the problem, really. They meant well, so it was hard to be cross when it somehow blew up in their faces. And she was not about to ask her students to re-write their papers because Oscar interpreted ‘scan for’ as ‘DESTROY’, was she?

“Oh no -- no that’s fine,” she insisted, trying her best to keep her eyes under control. “Oscar’s been through enough, don’t you think? Best we all look with our hands,” a beat, “and our eyes.”

[missbosswald]

fastesttempincoalhill:

“Alright, you lot. Let’s talk about something interesting for a change - what’s everyone planning for the summer holidays?”

“Dunno,” Clara shrugged, smiling just so at the prospect of summer holidays. Not long now. “But I definitely think we should get away again. Maybe Paris this year. Or America?”

[missbosswald]

Invasive Questions -- pt. one

I’m fairly certain this is going to blow up in my face somehow, but here goes. 

1. What’s your favourite colour? 

 Red, probably. Or a nice blue. Then again, it might be grey.

... Just so long as it’s not in my hair, thank you very much!

2. When you were in school (100 years ago) what did you want to be when you grew up? 

An explorer, maybe? Or a pilot. I was pretty keen on any career that would let me travel the world. 

3. What’s your favourite movie? 

You know that thing when someone asks you what your favourite movie is and you automatically forget every movie you’ve ever seen? Yeah, having that. I don’t know, saw Wonder Woman recently and I quite liked it, so we’ll go with that.

4. When you’ve got good news, who is the first person you want to tell? 

My mum. The Doctor. Maybe Rory or John, depending on the news.

5. What’s your favourite season? 

Autumn. I love a leaf, me.

6. If you could travel anywhere in space or time, where would you go and why?

Dunno... somewhere awesome. Maybe Sherwood Forest, see if Robin Hood actually existed. Or maybe the Victorian era. I’d love to meet Jane Austen. 

7. What’s your lucky number?

I don’t believe in luck. 

8. Who’s your best mate?

The Doctor -- even if he says his is a squirrel -- or Rory Nina.

9. Do you believe in love at first sight? 

I believe in a lot of things at first sight, but love isn’t one of them.

10. Name two coworkers you ship with each other. 

Shipping my co-workers just seems wrong. That being said, I can think of a fair few I’d fancy shipping myself with.

[missbosswald]

“Right,” Clara started, chewing her lip as she looked around the room anxiously. “Thing is, I can’t actually remember where I placed my marking.” A pause, breath catching nervously as she turned her frantic eyes on the person stood next to her. “Don’t suppose you’ve seen it?”

[missbosswald]

harknessjack:

Jack eased into a smile when Clara laughed and complimented him. He knew that out of anyone in the school, Clara would be his match when it came to wits, charm, and most of all; control. “The same could be said of you,” he pointed out, raising a brow and gesturing with one hand back towards her. “Be lucky you weren’t the first to run into him.” It wasn’t that Jack regretted being the first to find Oscar and James, but he also sort of wished someone else would have.

He placed his hands on his hips and titled his head to the side with a sigh when Clara questioned his reasons. “What else would I do? Ask it out on a romantic date night?” He retorted, furrowing his brows and letting out a small laugh. “I mean – we both know I probably could convince Oscar to, but… I’m not interested in him.” However, he released a smile at her when she gave him her plans on what she’d do if she were the target of the robot’s affections. “Maybe I can train him to do that for you, and tack on coffee for me.”

Clara was still pretty sure she wouldn’t mind a little lovesick robot following her around with tea and chocolates, but she trusted Jack knew best. If he said she was lucky, he probably had a good reason. 

In fact, she was so wrapped up in the prospect of Jack training Oscar to bring her cuppa’s she almost missed it but --

“Wait -- hang on, why’d you say him like that?” Clara asked eyebrow raised pointedly, “does that mean there is a him you fancy? A non-robotic him?”

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

Oh yes, this was exactly what the Doctor was hoping for. Clara and all her wit and charms had one failing. Once her ego was appeased and given the proper respect, it was quite easy to manipulate afterwards.

Which was exactly what the Doctor was doing.

“Really?” He asked again, to make sure and to also rub it in a little, before giving her a broadened grin. “Excellent!” Turning sharply, he faced the children and spread his hands out, “alright, today we’re going to be planting potted flowers. Of course, they need to be de-potted, and since Clara is here, she’s going to take a group of you and show you just how to do that.”

He glanced over his shoulder at her and kept a small smirk on his lips. “Aren’t you, Clara?”

Yes. Yes, she was. Clara Oswald -- depotting girl!

She smiled almost smugly, proud of herself. She’d finally managed to get through to the old man. About time he started listening to her. 

Except..... if he was taking her advice -- really truly taking it -- then why was she on de-potting duty rather than Doctor duty? Wasn’t she meant to be helping him with his patience?

“Wait -- hang on, I what?”

[missbosswald]

exarchaeologist:

River tried not to laugh at the look on Clara’s face. She was very sweet to offer but she shook her head. “No, it’s fine I’ll just use someone else’s.”

“Yeah, right, of course,” Clara tapped her fingers against the mug idly, she wasn’t sure what it was -- generally she was rather confident to the point of cocky, but River had a way of making her feel off balance. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

It just proves I know you far better than you think I do.

No, because not many people get into a long enough conversation with me to compliment me. So, you’re welcome. Well maybe I don’t want to be a barefaced caretaker. What if I wanted to be a bearded caretaker? Would you protest that? Would anyone? Is there a law at this school against facial hair????????

You see nothing, probably because Jimmy keeps fogging up your class windows with his awful breath.

I don’t need a nanny, you need a nanny. You, the nanny, needs a nanny. A nanny for a nanny, imagine that.

No. No way, no that’s -- shut up!

And no, Doctor, I think we’ve all established you could pull off the beard. If you’re vying for more compliments, I am fresh out. 

What -- I don’t even know what that’s supposed to mean? Who’s Jimmy??

Okay, what’s up? Why are you acting weird?

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

I had a lot of faith in you, I knew you could and would do it.

…Now you’re saying I need the specs AND the beard? Why would I want to look like a proper teacher? Isn’t there enough of you lot running around looking like proper teachers as it is? I think I’m doing just fine looking like a proper Caretaker.

He’s only a snacker because you made him that way! Which means the beard was before your time, so you’ll never know that Barnabus liked it for the crumbs or not so hah!

And yes, please nanny him, he needs a nanny.

Yeah, well, I am a bit nosy. Suppose that worked to your advantage. 

No. What I’m saying is that I think you’d look... nice with either. Or both. Or whatever. Anyone ever tellyou you make it extremely difficult to give you a compliment, Doctor? And anyway, I wasn’t saying you SHOULD look like a teacher I just meant -- you know what? Whatever. Fine. Be a barefaced caretaker. Your choice.

And I did no such thing! Clearly, I’ve hit the mark and you’re just deflecting because you don’t like being wrong. I see you, Doctor. 

It’s not him who needs the nannying, Doctor, it’s you.

[rosetylecr]

How did you know? Those big sad eyes.

[missbosswald]

firstnamethe:

….I miss the beard.

It made Barnabus happy...I should grow the beard again. 

@missbosswald what do you think?

…And just look at James’ photo of me he posted, I’m too lazy to dig up another one.

I can’t believe you actually just made me read through all that nonsense just see what I’d been tagged in. And then again to find the bloody picture you were referring too. Yes, Doctor the specs are fetching. Pair them with the beard and you might just be mistaken for a proper teacher. 

As for the beard, I think it’s actually rather handsome. For a gray-haired stick insect, of course. But I tend to think the reason it made Barnabus so happy was all the crumbs it probably caught. You know he’s a snacker.

Now, you two done with this silliness or am I going to have to start nannying you?