Trying is a part of life

20's, She/Her, Simple and Random

[missmiyao]

Hello and hi. Thanks for visiting this blog. Most things written are random, some are explicit and dark, some are simply fluff. I mostly write about anime that I watched or hyper fixated so nothing is consistent. And yeah, I write what I want and when I could.

Mdni, please, leave. I do not responsible to any media you consumed especially in my blog.

Masterlist

All of my fanfiction heavily depicts female reader.

Haikyuu!! 🏐

Trapped

Dependent

Help

Us, Forever

Like That

Slowly, Surely

Without You

My Dearest

Arachnophobia

You Are Mine

Drabbles

Jealousy

Lovin' Ya

Happy Birthday, Suna

Blue Lock ⚽

Slice Of Life

Before

Matryoshka

Drabbles

Late Night Thoughts

His Picture

Our First

Twirling

Conversation between Brothers

Jersey

Worm

Cold

Pets

Scream

Good Apology

Let's Stardew! // Part 2

Cake

Random

Mistake

[missmiyao]

Mistake

Warning: Yandere, non-con, captive, gunshot, blood, isolation.

Thinking about yandere man that you thought you would be safe from if you keep your distance, but nope. You're always his, no matter what you do.

---

A pause.

Something that you shouldn't do. The sky is already dark ever since you're running away from that cottage. You should be.

Gasps and tears already wore you down by a lot. He will catch you if you didn't move your feet faster and faster. You tried hiding before, but he caught you immediately.

In the cottage, in the basement, in the attic.

You hide, waiting for him to at least leave before run but you failed. He saw through everything and brings you back to the bedroom. You hate it. You hate him, you wanted to leave ever since.

You shouldn't be here.

"Ah—" A branch makes you stumble your steps and you fall face and hands first. The ground scratch your hands, and the mud soiled your face without even a single care.

You wouldn't mind that too, as long as he's not here with. Slowly standing up, you decided that it's time to run faster.

Bang

You heard it before you could even react. All you feel is your left leg is in pain. Blood spills and soaks the end of your dress.

"What a pitiful little dove. Ya sure ya try harder?"

In the end, he's always there. He slowly walks to reach you. He puts away his gun somewhere that you couldn't care where, and he grip your hair so hard that your scalp feels the burn.

"Let's go back to where we belong, my dove."

-

Was it wrong to dislike someone without a reason?

People might say it's such a bad thing, you can't do that and people are just a bitch when they're hating on a good person. Good? You wasn't sure about that. You dislike— no. You hate that man.

He's someone that wasn't even on the same level as you. Life, money, relationship, whatever it is. He's more and more, and you're just you. You only knew him in college since you two took a class together.

He knows you hate him on the first time your eyes laid on him.

Hate is a strong word, he thinks.

But to you, it is a perfect word to describe it.

There's nothing wrong with the man himself, it's just, you got this weird feeling when you see him. You don't want him near you, breathing the same air as you or even let him look at you.

He feel it.

And that's your second mistake.

He wanted to know why, as starter. Everyone likes him while you don't. Soon, it turns into a war in his mind since he wanted to befriend you. When you hate the idea, he decided to go above and beyond.

You hate the idea too, so that's your third mistake. You should just act that you like him. As if friends.

Yet, you can't help but scoff when you see his face. He dislike that too.

So it turns into an obsession. A twisted thinking and action that he did. He wants you to accept him, like him, be someone close to him. He scared you that way and you leave without a trace. That irks him. How can you be like that? Leaving him hanging while he's already addicted to you?

When he sees you again, all pretty and dressed up during an event related to his family as a guest, he just can't let you leave.

He pull a string that he once put on your neck a few years ago and that's how you ended up on his bed that night. On the next day, you tried to leave. Tried is the action.

You can't, unfortunately.

Everything starts to fall into their place— his words, not yours.

When you bang his face with his phone and tried running, he outrun you, pulling you by leg back to the bedroom that you hate.

He's being serious about making you lose everything so that he could make you rely on him, forever. That idea makes you puke on the spot. He's not angry, but smile happily upon your reaction.

A reaction that he never see from before. He intends to get anything he can get from you, any reaction, emotionally, physically or verbal.

You were taken away from your family and friends. A great life you once look forward to live in turns into a pit of darkness. You can't see any light in it and you can't move, too scared to move. You might fall deeper and deeper and the scariest part is that you might not come back to life.

At first, he tried to be the sweetest. You recoiled upon his touch, scared and disgusted. You hate him more than you ever had.

When trying to be the sweet, perfect gentleman didn't get him to where he wanted, that's when he turned abusive.

He took what he wanted in one night. His kiss feels like a fire to you, as if he lit a cigarette and push it right into your mouth. It's disgusting and beyond humanity.

Moving to the cottage is actually his own idea as he hate the idea of you staring down from the 48th floor of his spacious house. You seen a lot of people which gave you hope to run away from that.

He hates that.

"Where are we going?" One night, you ask since he's packing not only his clothes but yours too.

"Away from the people, my dove."

You dislike the travelling process.

He makes sure you passed out before driving real far. You don't know where you are, whether you're in the same state or not, you don't know. The idea is intense and scary, knowing that he's totally serious.

Everything is tree. Birds surround the area, watching you. If you stare too hard, you might as well took their gaze as pity. Perhaps mocking you. Your pitiful mistakes turned you into this.

"Here, my dove. Now, we're officially husband and wife."

That's so sick. You see a pair of rings and he's about to grab your hands.

"No. No way. Leave me alone! Why, why the hell would you do this to me? You're fucked up in the head! Why you do this to me? Why me!" You push his hands away from you. The idea of married to him is far the worst punishment the God could give you, apart from him burning you with his sickening touch.

He scowl, eyes turning dark and that's your other mistake that you could've even bothered counting anymore.

He didn't explain, other than grabbing you by chin and pushing your back to the door that you just entered.

"Give everythin' to me. Anything. I want everything from ya. As long as it's from ya, I don't care if it's cruel words, sobbing and tears, pain, sweat, blood— I thrive in that, my dove. Believe me when I said that. If ya ain't giving me shit, I'll take it from ya by force."

-

He's always true to his words.

After that incident, you do think you can't move your legs freely anymore. He cut you so that you need to rely on a cane to walk— or him. The latter is what he preferred anyway.

He's humming something in the kitchen while you're sitting at the dining table, so much for waiting for him.

No expression, nothing else.

Yet, if he didn't like it, he will soon do something to make sure to elicit a reaction from you.

"Ya good, dove? Today's your favourite. I'll make sure to always add extra love for ya."

You can't even pretend this is normal.

Yet, it makes you thinking.

His hand is holding a spoon, ensuring the soup he made is not too hot for you to consume.

What if you fake everything?

Your mouth slowly open, as he feed you oh so happily.

What if you acted friendly and be boring? So boring that you blended well with the girls he only scoffs at because they grind close enough to him because he's handsome and successful?

"Good girl. One more."

The soup taste good, but it turned bitter when it reaches your throat. Still, you smile. Acting like this is what you feel. Happy. Wanting him to be gentle to you, to leave you alone.

His laugh scared you, since it come right after your fake little smile.

"I would always keep ya with me. Entertaining, never boring. Even if ya act like those bitches who wore those fancy perfumes, too tight clothes and shit, I'll still get ya. I will get ya, dove." Another feed coming.

Maybe, it's your mistake to think that acting like that would make him leave you alone. You're destined to be like this, as if fate would do anything to tie you two down together, either you like it or not.

End

[missmiyao]

It feel so good when someone commented on one story that I wrote like 3 maybe 4 years ago— shitty plot and stuff BUT they're genuinely happy and love it!

Owwwwwww thank youuuuu.

[missmiyao]

Cake (ft. Rin Itoshi)

"Okay, why you're pissing left and right?" Rin never gets the answer. No one usually does.

"Hmph."

"Is it about the cake? I told you it's delicious." He sigh, as if he chose the wrong words next, he might lose a lot of things. One of it is his usually perfect sleep.

"Not about that."

"Then, what?"

"I told you I whisk that batter for a very long time! It's been 3 days and you didn't buy me a hand mixer!" Rin feels like he's going crazy. How, how would he know?

"You never told me to!"

"Why I need to tell you every single thing? Pick up your damn socks, eat your veggies, buy me heating pad, text Sae, then—"

"Okay, okay. I'll buy you one next morning so stop being pissy and let's go to bed, okay?"

You got a new hand mixer next day while Rin got bombarded thousands of text why he refuse to participate in voluntary training.

End

[missmiyao]

I got a new expensive hobby and it's baking. Ingredients are never cheap. :/

[missmiyao]

Let's Stardew! (ft. Sae Itoshi)

Part 2

So a few days ago, you managed to make Sae to buy PCs and also bought Stardew Valley to play together. His schedule is hectic, of course. He’s a man of routine. After a few years together– combined with days when you two were knowing each other, dating, has a few issues together, went back on and off for a few times and get engaged and married, yup. You know him by heart. He sometimes cold, distant and has his own sense of humor, but you know Sae means well.

He love you and you love him.

“So, how are we going to start this game?” He just finished taking his shower, dresses in his pyjamas and his bangs down without any hair products. He’s lovely, as usual. You? Already sitting on the chair, excited to play together with Sae.

You explain a few things to him– his seats is just next to yours, as your PC is just side by side. He nods after understand what button to press. Sae also design his own character to match his real life descriptions. You didn’t skip the introductions of the game so he could fully immerse himself in the game.

“Seems like Joja is the JFU. We’re leaving this toxic company, finally.” He commented. You nodding, before tell him to continue.

The first day, of course. You decided to simply go with the Standard Farm since it’s big and you could do almost everything with it. It would be hard for Sae if you chooses Riverland Farm or Wilderness Farm. So yeah, basic and efficient. Now, parsnips. You two planted everything together. You clean some debris and Sae tried to use axe to chop down the tree and he scoff when he see how inefficient it is.

“God, seriously? That much chopping took like my entire energy? Lukewarm.” He commented.

“Don’t chop all of them. Here, I made a chest. Put your things here.” You said, after watering all the parsnips.

“Wait, this rock is blocking me– Urgh, where’s the pickaxe?” He mutters, before you two continue your journey. You introduce him to the people in the valley. He literally judge every single one of them. No one excluded. He roasted and never lose. You wonder if he did background check with every single one of them before playing. It seems like he has the eyes to know if that person is good or bad.

“You ain’t taking me down there?”

“We’re going to the beach tomorrow. Willy’s back tomorrow and he’s going to give us a fishing rod.” He hums, before he decides to go to the left side of the map.

“Where does this lead us?” He stops to look at cows at Marnie’s barn.

“Let's try our luck. We might have spring onion waiting for us down there.” He asks down what, but follows you shortly after. He seems amused to see new things there.

“We're going to deforest this whole area. Wait until my energy is all back.” He looks excited— his expression is normal, but you know he is when he picks up a dandelion and a wild horseradish.

“You can give them to the people at the town to increase friendship! Though, be careful. Not everyone likes—” He accidentally gift it to Haley who was somehow near the area.

“Stupid, half-baked NPC!” He cursed when he realized Haley hates wild horseradish.

“Babe, calm down. It can be fixed. It's not going to be a negative friendship point.”

“Duh, I want to keep that radish. We could sell it or something.” He mutters. You two then walk around to greet Robin and her husband, met Sebastian when he finally left the room before meeting Linus.

You also remind Sae to look around for anything on the ground, which he somehow lost at one point.

Sure, it's just the beginning. The chaos begins when you two get your fishing rod. You should consider the idea to livestream this.

End

[missmiyao]

Let's Stardew! (ft. Sae Itoshi)

"Why you marry that guy?" Sae squints at your phone as you married one of your favourite bachelor in Year 2. Alex.

"What's wrong with marrying Alex?"

"You should stay single for the rest of your life, until you find someone suitable. None of them looks like me." He finally leans down to your side, hugging your waist as he put his chin to your shoulder.

"I told you to co-op with me in Stardew. You said you're too busy. That's why I approach this guy."

"He works out in his room, shirtless and has stupid poster."

You smack him away, but he managed to dodge at the very last minute.

"I could do better than that. I'm good at cleaning, good sense of humor, athletic, handsome—" As he's bragging, you put your palm to his lips.

"Sae, baby, shut up. It's just a game. A cozy, farming game. In real life, sure. You're far more than them." You continue to play after that, farming, planting more parsnips, water them, chopping some trees and stuff.

"Deforestation is bad." He commented.

"The trees will grow back. No worries. Also, we can plant some here and there." You continue to gift people here and there.

"Wouldn't he be jealous if you give gifts to another bachelors?"

"Not if I didn't date them."

"That's wild." He replied. He seems to continue watching, as you decided to go mining. Sae hums when he see how good you are with sword. Since you didn't finish community center yet, you can't go to Ginger Island.

"You should buy us PC and we could create our own cozy farm." He seems to like that idea. You might be getting a PC later.

"'Kay." Sae gives you a peck on the forehead, before he leave the bed and that's a sign for you to go back home before the clock strike 2 a.m.. You ain't losing money yet.

Two days later, Sae arrived with 2 men and you see it. Two PCs'.

"Now we can co-op." Sae said, with a smirk on his face.

End

[missmiyao]

I wonder how other writers remember the plot, names, times, etc etc of the story that they left forgotten for a year or two or more. I'm amazed when they continue their story and act as they never leave— perfect writing, long paragraphs and words, passion, stuff.

Guess I need to learn from the best.

[missmiyao]

Omg, today's Isagi's birthday.

[missmiyao]

Good Apology (ft. Sae Itoshi)

Warning: Smut.

"Shut up, Sae. Get your fucking half ass apologies and shove it right back in your ass. I hate you." He's on his stupid phone for the fifth time on the night. It's your time with him. Not him and those stupid sponsors.

"Babe, calm down."

"You didn't even like me anyway, right? Must be so good playing and toying me like a freaking Barbie." Sae sigh, wondering why you're acting like a brat even though it's not a big deal.

Sponsorship calls his manager and when his manager need to decide something very important, he went ahead and call him. That's what Sae told Girolan when he made him his manager. Call him when it's needed.

Though, it might get on your nerves. Also, when you're angry, you tend to speak something stupid and unrelated.

"I like you enough."

"Liar. I saw you scrolled pictures of model in bikini."

"I was looking at her earrings. It's an ad. I want to buy you nice things."

"You stared hard at her cleavage!"

"It doesn't even real in the first place. Why would I?"

"Oh, now you know if her boobs are fake? Wow!" He take a deep breath. It's his fault for saying something stupid. He knows better than pushing you button when you're angry.

"I like you enough, more than I could ever like the other girl." He grab you by the chin, ensuring you focus on him alone and alone.

"Yeah...? Proof?" You stammered. Sae and his nonchalant act. It always make you heart flutter, even though the situation wasn't supposed to be that way.

"Remember your birthday last week?"

Oh sure, you remember that. You, Sae and the hotel room he booked for your birthday. It's all sin and messy.

"No..." You look away— tried to. But his grip is so strong that make you stare at him with that stupid eyes once again.

"I never done that. That was the first time, ever. I would like that to happen again though." He lock his intense eyes on yours, and you feel like the heat finally reaches you ears and cheeks.

"That's not fair... Saying things like that when I'm mad." You're pouting, and indeed, you finally calm down.

"Want me to de-stress you, pretty girl?" Hell yeah, sure.

Once again, the night at the hotel kinda repeat itself. You, him, this time on the sofa in the living room. You see Sae under you when you look down. He looks debauched, more than you. You never see any man so desperate like that only to lick pussy.

His bangs already sticks to his forehead, his breath is unsteady, unlike when he's on field and his arm is right on your waist. He's holding you possessively and might die if you move from your spot.

"Love you babe." He's eating you out like it's his salvation. He never stop, never falter. You tried to reciprocate, try to make him feel good with you hands at first, but he stops you.

A little confused, you tried to use your mouth but he stops you once again.

"Baby— fuck... So good." You hold on tight, since his tongue reaches so deep. It's been a while since he do this, and when he does, he never half assing it.

"Let me, baby. Sit on my face and enjoy. Shit—" When he pull you closer, it seems like you truly sit on his face. He doesn't care of less oxygen or maybe he didn't feel it like that. All you feel now is his tongue on your clit, lapping it like it's spend 3 days without a drink. He moans like he's the one getting his dick suck.

Sae moves you harshly, intending to bump everything down there with his mouth, lips, nose, chin, whatever he has.

"S—S—Sae fuck! Oh—" He double his effort, spank your ass twice.

And somehow—

"Sae..." You feel something sticky on your face right after you cum. No way? But when you slowly open your eyes and touch your face, it seems like it's reality.

"I never like someone too much like how I like you. You make me cum untouched." He sounds so proud that it makes you shy.

"Well... That— that's not fair. You literally..."

"I fucked you with my tongue? That's pretty normal when you like someone enough. Though in my case, I love you." He tap your waist before pull you to a good position.

"You're too straightforward with that mouth of yours."

"Hell yeah, babe. Sure I am. I'm sorry for making you feel neglected. Are we good now?"

Nodding, you intertwine your hands with his.

"Yes. A good apology, indeed."

End

[siratonin]

"I CANT HANDLE THIS" *handles this*

[siratonin]

"I CANT TAKE ANOTHER DAY" *takes another day*

[missmiyao]

"I WANT TO QUIT THIS JOB" *still working on the next day*

[missmiyao]

Scream (ft. Sae Itoshi)

"Sae."

"No. Absolutely not."

He stare at you with such uninterested expression, but you always get what you wanted. You wanted this and he will be a part of it.

"Just once, please?" Your eyes are filled with hopes, sparkles with sunshine and rainbows and damn it, Sae Itoshi's heart becomes so soft just by making eye contact with you.

He sigh, exhale slowly before stare at you right into your eyes. Thus, his teal eyes softened seeing how enthusiastic you are regarding this request.

"Fine. Just once."

"Yeay! I love you so much, baby."

The Internet blows up that day. Even Michael Kaiser, Leonardo Luna, even Iglesias Bunny stare at their phone with disbelief.

It's just a short video— less than a minute, showing you— Sae Itoshi's wife living her dream.

“Took a lot to convince him 🖤”

You're running. Sweats all over your face. Judging by your face, you're panicking. You're scared, trembling, even. You looked back a few times, watching if that masked man is nearby.

It's scary when you feel him closer. It fucked your senses, as you're trembling just to open your door. Fast, you enter and push it hard to close.

A hand.

A hand stops you from doing so.

You're out of breath.

"Be careful what you wish for."

It gets thousands of likes within 5 minutes and shared by millions in 15 minutes. Fans are commenting on how good Sae was as a masked man, while his teammates are roasting him. The others that know him stare at their phone with disbelief.

"Thank goodness you didn't post the second part of the video babe. Or else, we're so in trouble for your public relations." You said, after Rin texted you with a very long words, all caps lock.

"Nah, that will stay hidden in my gallery." He replied, before sipping his tea.

"Eh, why? I thought you like it. You smiled when we rewatch it earlier." You stand up without thinking much of it and wash your cup, while Sae hums in happiness.

"Yeah, no one can see how you reacted when I pull your legs. You're begging me to let you go, resisting like I'm about to do something bad to you on our bed." You didn't hear that since his voice is so slow, but Sae knows that he have won in his life. Perhaps, he could record a few other things and indulge himself in your little fantasy.

End

[missmiyao]

Pets (ft. Sae Itoshi)

"Awww Sae we should get—"

"No." It's so fast. He rarely shut you down this fast. You gasped, surprised and of course, dramatically.

"I didn't even say anything yet!" You countered, and he just shrugged. It was a peaceful morning, to be honest. Sae rarely had a day off when the season started, but when the gruesome match ended yesterday? He finally gets to sleep early and wake up a little late than usual.

Of course, having you on his day off is pretty rare too.

"That's why I said no. Also, you ain't being slick about it babe. You keep sending those videos to me. We can't have a babydoll sheep as our pet in this house."

"But they are cute..."

"Ain't a good reason to have a pet just because they're cute, no? Also, it need shearing like once a year and we both know we're too busy even for that. You need to bring the sheep for health check up, the foods— Besides, look at our apartment. What if it chew your carpet? You're going to get angry at the sheep and stuff."

His arguments are pretty solid. It stunned you for a while. Sae is far mature and honestly thinking above and beyond, even before you not so subtly telling him about getting one.

"You're right... I kinda didn't think through about this."

He pats your back, and you leans against his shoulder.

"True. Pets are responsibility. We shouldn't just get them as a pet and ignore their needs. They have feelings too, okay?" He kissed your forehead, and you hum.

"But if you're that lonely, I guess we could try to find something low maintenance..."

"How about we take a cactus as our pet? I've heard from Rin that on of his friend has taken one as a pet!"

Sae stare at you with disbelief.

"Cactus is a plant..."

"It's low maintenance, babe!"

Sae didn't say anything, but seeing you so excited scrolling through your phone about Cactus Facts That You Need to Know makes his heart warms a little bit. Sure, he'll get you a cactus one day.

End

[missmiyao]

Happy Birthday, Suna! (Ft. Rintaro Suna)

Warning, suggestive.

"Happy birthday, Rinnie!" You offer him a box. Slowly, he stare at you. His gaze longing, wondering what did you put inside the box.

You always been on the naughty side. You and the Miyans always do something stupid in high school. Yet, he always mesmerized by you.

"What's this?" He tap the box once, before shake it a few times.

"Open it silly. It's obvi that it's for your birthday." You rolled your eyes upon his nonchalant respond.

"Yeah but I want to know before I open it. Is it stupid? Is it weird? Is it a prank?" He slowly undo the ribbon. The box finally undone, revealing another box inside.

He scoff, and you giggles.

"Another box?"

"Open it."

"Nah..."

"Well, your choice!" You leave the area, leaving him stunned for 3 seconds before Suna open the box.

Another box.

Open.

Another box.

Open.

Another box.

He's going to throw this little box to the wall if there's nothing on it. Yet, when he unravel the final box, Suna noticed a two pieces of paper. One written in orange marker while the other one in blue.

“Reliving Rinnie's note number 342”

“A 3 some with Samu <3”

Suna's eyes never went bigger like this in his whole life. Though, he pick one paper before run to get to you. He never run faster in his whole life, not even in volleyball match.

"Babe!!! I want the blue one!"

End

Aww happy birthday to our middle blocker Rinnie!!

[missmiyao]

I lowkey wants to learn Portuguese. Any tips?

[missmiyao]

Cold (ft. Sae Itoshi)

It's rare for Sae to catch a cold. He seems sensitive nowadays, especially when winter is around the corner. He said that he used to dressed up as reindeer when he's still a kid, since his mother said his nose will be redder than normal people— for Halloween and Christmas.

Rin usually gets to be the Santa and a scary Santa.

Anyway, your husband is laying beside you, as you're watching the television. You put on a movie, perhaps a Chinese movie. It's like reincarnation or something, but you lost your interest ever since Sae sneeze a few times and wipe his nose with the handkerchief that you gave him around 39 minutes ago.

"Go to bed, Sae. The medicine will knock you out and I'm not going to be responsible when you wake up and have ache all over your body just because you sleep on the sofa." He's warm like a whole, chunky cat. It bothers you a little bit, but he seems adamant about leaving your side.

"You're my bed." He mutters slowly, as if catching the cold is his final time.

He acts like he's going to die.

"Sae..."

"I feel worst than ever... I can only breath with one nostril, I keep sneezing—" He sneeze, before wipe the mucus with the handkerchief. His eyes already watery, before he leans closer. Sure, you don't mind. You didn't get sick that easy. Sae does though.

"Told you to take a good care of your health."

"I just indulge myself a little bit... It's not fair that you have a good— Achoo!" You massage his scalp until he whimpers. Oh God, this man is going to be the death of you.

"How about you go to bed, sleep until you're okay, take the medicine and I will make you your favourite food for dinner? How's that sound?" He hums, since the massage already got him hooked.

"Deal..."

"I'll get something to help you with the pain."

"You're the cure to my everything!"

"Yeah yeah, drama king."

End

[missmiyao]

I would love to write more but my lazy stupid ass can't. My hands won't move. The only thing moving is my brain that's generating ideas.

The only time I write is when I need to do something important. Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh