The police pull my lifeless body from a lake but I’m wearing the funniest hat they’ve ever seen and they can’t stop laughing and keep dropping me back into the water

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@mistrmistyeyes
The police pull my lifeless body from a lake but I’m wearing the funniest hat they’ve ever seen and they can’t stop laughing and keep dropping me back into the water
help, my wife got wine drunk and tried to set our marriage certificate on fire, saying “good luck trying to return me without the receipt”
“This is your Sunday evening reminder that you can handle whatever this week throws at you.”
~ Think I’ll just reblog this for myself every Sunday.
I wonder if people in an Urban Fantasy setting have to worry about mimics posing as packages at their doors
Person: “Oh hey my package is here– waaaait I DIDN’T ORDER ANYTHING!”
Mimic:
am I sick from anxiety or am I actually physically ill? a memoir by me
am i lazy or horribly depressed: the sequel
does everyone hate me or am I just very insecure: the completion of the trilogy
The longer you look at this image the stranger it gets
Photos of Jupiter from NASA’s Juno
This image shows part of the Tarantula Nebula’s outskirts. This famously beautiful nebula, located within the Large Magellanic Cloud (LMC).
Image Credit: ESA/Hubble & NASA: acknowledgement: Josh Barrington
The nebula, located 20,000 light-years away in the constellation Carina, contains a central cluster of huge, hot stars, called NGC 3603.
Image credit: NASA/ESA/Hubble
my mom is 61 and her bf is a huge nerd and he’s teaching her to play magic the gathering and he had her watch avatar the last airbender with him and his ringtone is terra’s theme from final fantasy 6 and he paints pictures of sephiroth. my mom’s bf is nerdier than i’ll ever be.
and she does all these pinterest crafts and now she makes little bejeweled vials of healing potions for him and his buddies. my little geek heart can’t handle all this.
edit: just picture a 60-something woman with a VERY thick minnesotan accent saying “mike is having me watch the naruto”
just fyi my mom is now 62 and they finished watching “the naruto”
if i had told my 13-year-old self that this is what my mom’s hallway would look like when i was 30 i wouldn’t have believed me
believe it
Please share to support older fans in fandom ♥️
i had a dream last night that mothman was getting sued by the state of west virginia for accidentally breaking light posts and he hired me as his lawyer and in court i was like “now my client is a giant moth so you cant blame him for loving lights” and halfway through my speech i turned to address mothman and saw he was bumping into the courtroom lights and they broke and caused a power outage
i was watching a moth fly around my room and decided to turn on my tv and the first thing that came on screen was a court room scene of a law and order episode and i got fucking whiplash
depression tips™
shower. not a bath, a shower. use water as hot or cold as u like. u dont even need to wash. just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. sit on the floor if you gotta.
moisturize everything. use whatever lotion u like. unscented? dollar store lotion? fancy ass 48 hour lotion that makes u smell like a field of wildflowers? use whatever you want, and use it all over.
put on clean, comfortable clothes.
put on ur favorite underwear. cute black lacy panties? those ridiculous boxers u bought last christmas with candy cane hearts on the butt? put em on.
drink cold water. use ice. if u want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost.
clean something. doesn’t have to be anything big. organize one drawer of ur desk. wash five dirty dishes. do a load of laundry. scrub the bathroom sink.
blast music. listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. sing to it, dance to it, even if you suck at both.
make food. don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. take the time and make food. even if it’s ramen. add something special to it, like a hard boiled egg or some veggies. prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.
make something. write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. even if you don’t think you’re good at it.
go outside. take a walk. sit in the grass. look at the clouds. smell flowers. put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.
call someone. call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. talk to a stranger on the street. have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. if you can’t, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. even if you don’t say much, listen to them.
cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them. take pictures of them. talk to them. tell them how u feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out.
Reblog as much as you can
Absolutely helpful. I think I’ve done three or four of these things today, makes you feel better.
I do a lot of these things to cope, very helpful post.
It’s not often you see depression tips that are actually useful on this hellsite, these are all good though. Also good things to do (depressed or not) if you’re feeling lethargic or can’t focus!
new four temperaments are clown, 80s, cowboy, and goth.