A collection of thoughts

[mitalismusings]

Why We Travel, by Pico Iyer

Editor’s Note: The following guest article by 2013 Adventure Travel World Summit keynote speaker Pico Iyer was originally posted on Salon.com on March 18, 2000. Pico Iyer is a contributing editor of Salon Travel & Food. His new book is

Really enjoyed this perspective shared on traveling having just completed a 14 day trip out of the country. 

“...Travel in that sense guides us toward a better balance of wisdom and compassion — of seeing the world clearly, and yet feeling it truly. For seeing without feeling can obviously be uncaring; while feeling without seeing can be blind.Yet for me the first great joy of traveling is simply the luxury of leaving all my beliefs and certainties at home, and seeing everything I thought I knew in a different light, and from a crooked angle. “

[mitalismusings]

NYTimes: Self-Sufficiency Is Overrated

Self-Sufficiency Is Overrated https://nyti.ms/3oSLLhO

Opinion | Self-Sufficiency Is Overrated

When I opened myself up to the generosity of others, even small kindnesses suddenly felt outsized in their humanity.

"...But my friend’s generosity made me realize that I do want for something. I want someone else to take care of me. Articulating this felt dangerous, vulnerable. Generally, I want to not want."

[mitalismusings]

NYTimes: (It’s Great to) Suck at Something

(It’s Great to) Suck at Something https://nyti.ms/2qgOfI0

Opinion | (It’s Great to) Suck at Something (Published 2017)

I’m terrible at surfing. Then why do it? Because the freedom to fail without caring is revelatory.

"...In the words of the Zen teacher Shunryu Suzuki, “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities; in the expert’s mind, there are few.” When I surf, I live in the possibility.

....Maybe sucking at something where the stakes are low can lead us to a better place. Maybe it could be a kind of a medicine for the epidemic cocksureness in our culture. Seeing ourselves repeatedly doing something we suck at — no matter how trivial — might make us a bit more sympathetic to how hard so many things really are..."

[mitalismusings]

Optimists Live Longer

A new study out by the Harvard School of Public Health is indicating that optimism leads to a longer life. The study found that optimists ha

"...we may not have control over some of what happens to us, but we absolutely have control over how we see it. Believing that the glass is half full or half empty has now been shown to have a material effect on one’s lifespan."

[mitalismusings]

The Two Friends Who Changed How We Think About How We Think

A new book by the author of “Moneyball” shows how, together, the psychologists Amos Tversky and Daniel Kahneman made the world a better plac

What an amazing friendship between two completely different people. An inspiration of the great work that come out of deep collaborations.

"...Tversky once said, “It is sometimes easier to make the world a better place than to prove you have made the world a better place.” "

[mitalismusings]

One unlikely culprit to burnout? Your lack of laziness

If you’re feeling unmotivated or without direction, these sentiments aren’t necessarily character flaws but warning signs.

Finally a way to explain the benefit of my "laziness" which I have been called in different ways at different times in my life...I always saw it as just a more efficient way of operating that gave me more free time.

"...You’ve probably been trained to think that feeling unmotivated or directionless means that there’s something wrong with you, and that if you just try harder, you’ll be able to push through. But rather than viewing these feelings as a reflection of something negative about your character, they should really be viewed as your body’s early warning system."

[mitalismusings]

Leaving burnout behind: the pain and pleasure of starting a new career in my 50s

I spent 30 years as a journalist before deciding to become a secondary school teacher. While a complete career change is rare, it is one of

Never be afraid to start anew... To break away from the mold you have created to date. We must try multiple things and experiment with our careers and interests to continue to grow on this journey of life.

"...I don’t wish I had switched careers earlier. But what I do wish is that someone had told me long ago that my working life would probably last at least 50 years, and I would need to have multiple careers. I wish the government and employers were thinking about this, too, and helping us along. I wish that everyone was taught at the outset that it was normal for their income to rise and fall precipitously over their working lives, and to plan for that. I wish that my story was so commonplace that there would be no point in my writing it."

[mitalismusings]

There's a Swearing Double Standard—and Women Can Change It - Emma Byrne on Gendered Perception of Swearing

"...Women’s swearing, like women’s anger, seems to terrify and perplex. That’s why there are papers with titles like “Why Do Women Swear?” but no one has ever put together a scientific study to understand why men do. We can use that to our advantage—reclaim swearing, like we’ve reclaimed “nasty woman.” That might not feel easy; even when we’re incensed by an injustice, apoplectic about an abuse, it can still feel uncomfortable to swear, because swearing demands attention. Swearing says: My experience and my feelings matter and you will hear me. The world isn’t used to us expressing our fury in no uncertain terms. We’re not used to it.

Well, fuck that—it’s time."

[mitalismusings]

The Radical Compassion Institute

Really enjoyed doing this course and helped me get back on track with a regular meditation practice. The first 2 modules are basic (for those with prior meditation practice) and sets the stage for the concepts later in the course. Took me longer than 40 days to finish it but was worth the persistence.

[mitalismusings]

Why Searching for Happiness Makes You Unhappy

Does Trying to Be Happy Make Us Unhappy?

Here's what the latest research has to say.

"... the best things in life can only be pursued indirectly. I believe this is true for happiness: If you truly want to experience joy or meaning, you need to shift your attention away from joy or meaning, and toward projects and relationships that bring joy and meaning as byproducts. As the great philosopher John Stuart Mill once wrote, “Those only are happy who have their minds fixed on some object other than their own happiness.”

[mitalismusings]

Arianna Huffington: What I Love Most About Turning 70

We all know what matters in life — so why do we wait to act on it?

"...When you don’t think of death as the end — and I never did — getting older is about liberation. It’s about the non-essentials falling away, about not looking over your shoulder for approval and about not making up scary fantasies about the future."

[mitalismusings]

Ithaka by C. P. Cavafy | Poetry Foundation

Ithaka by C. P. Cavafy | Poetry Foundation

As you set out for Ithaka

As you set out for Ithaka

hope your road is a long one,

full of adventure, full of discovery.

Laistrygonians, Cyclops,

angry Poseidon—don’t be afraid of them:

you’ll never find things like that on your way

as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,

as long as a rare excitement

stirs your spirit and your body.

Laistrygonians, Cyclops,

wild Poseidon—you won’t encounter them

unless you bring them along inside your soul,

unless your soul sets them up in front of you.

Hope your road is a long one.

May there be many summer mornings when,

with what pleasure, what joy,

you enter harbors you’re seeing for the first time;

may you stop at Phoenician trading stations

to buy fine things,

mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,

sensual perfume of every kind—

as many sensual perfumes as you can;

and may you visit many Egyptian cities

to learn and go on learning from their scholars.

Keep Ithaka always in your mind.

Arriving there is what you’re destined for.

But don’t hurry the journey at all.

Better if it lasts for years,

so you’re old by the time you reach the island,

wealthy with all you’ve gained on the way,

not expecting Ithaka to make you rich.

Ithaka gave you the marvelous journey.

Without her you wouldn't have set out.

She has nothing left to give you now.

And if you find her poor, Ithaka won’t have fooled you.

Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,

you’ll have understood by then what these Ithakas mean.

[mitalismusings]

Quitting Your Job Is a Sign of Optimism - The Atlantic

What Quitters Understand About the Job Market

More Americans are telling their boss to shove it. Is the workplace undergoing a revolution—or just a post-pandemic spasm?

Ahead of the trend...

"...Quitting gets a bad rap in life, as it’s associated with pessimism, laziness, and lack of confidence. In labor economics, however, quits signify the opposite: an optimism among workers about the future; an eagerness to do something new; and a confidence that if they jump ship, they won’t drown but rather just land on a better, richer boat."

[mitalismusings]

‘Happiness scholar’ offers lessons in healing rifts

In the Solutions series, Arthur Brooks, a “happiness scholar” at HKS and HBS, explains why we’re so divided as a nation and suggests some ac

Enjoyed reading this analysis by Arthur Brooks who writes a column in happiness in The Atlantic. This is a nicely written explanation of the toxicity in the US.

"...there are two basic polarities in politics or in families or in companies or communities or universities. There’s the fear-based polarity, and there’s the love-based polarity. Fear and love are opposites, philosophically and psychologically. Fear is the ultimate negative emotion; love is the ultimate positive emotion. That doesn’t mean that when you love that you don’t disagree and you don’t fight. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have bitter disputes; just that love is the vehicular language, meaning there’s a lot of basic trust and compassion for others. When you have a fear-based ideology, instead of trust and compassion, there’s mistrust and contempt."

[mitalismusings]

A few thoughts on depression

A repost from the archives of my old blog

Great description of the feelings thoughts and needs of someone going thru a depressive episode

[mitalismusings]

9 Beliefs You Have to Let Go If You Want to Find Inner Peace

Try as we may to be calm, we will always struggle if we hold onto these nine beliefs that get in the way of our inner peace.

"...But I’ve come to realize since then that the real change happens when you let go of ideas, as opposed to following new ones"

[mitalismusings]

NYTimes: The Pandemic Shrank Our Social Circles. Let’s Keep It That Way.

The Pandemic Shrank Our Social Circles. Let’s Keep It That Way. https://nyti.ms/3eFRgvx

The Pandemic Shrank Our Social Circles. Let’s Keep It That Way.

You don’t need to rekindle your friendship with your kid’s soccer teammate’s father if you don’t want to.

I am "Dr Cohen" 😁 At the beginning of covid I created a list called "Covid Conversations" of friends/social circles/team mates and was deliberate about the frequency (weekly, monthly, quarterly) with which I wanted to connect with these folks. I then made the connections happen... Reconnecting with old friends who I had lost touch with, scheduling the groups to connect, setting up zoom meetings, whatsapp video chats, etc. It was a savior during shelter in place - I got the support I needed to thrive during covid and helped me feel more connected and useful to others.