im going to be candid here + open in ways i cannot b or adequately express thru twitter (limited character count). lol yes this is a femslash grievance
but im tired of being in this fandom space where the full scope of human expression is naturally assumed in male characters w less screentime (less screentime = less time to complicate the initial assumption abt the character) while the interactions of the two women characters who are canonically involved by the end of the show and the start of the second move are flattened/desexed/fucking boring? yes this is abt ritsuko and maya
and im not talking just quantity or number of fanworks dedicated 2 these characters, and this isnt abt me being greedy+jealous+whatever u want to paint it. if there is any ritsumaya, its like, disgustingly tame and sanitized and this concentration of perfect honesty, communication, sentimentality, and articulated affection.
which. we know this is not how either of these characters are shown to communicate…? ritsuko evades sincerity or outright lies. she uses her own cynicism against maya in the most condescending way possible to dismiss maya’s ethical concerns. ritsuko’s blunted emotionally except when she’s teasing ppl+admonishing misato for the same kinds of behavior that ritsuko herself is guilty of (and worse), or she’s engaging in her own private joke–laughing at everyone who is out of the loop. her chosen love interest is not only her dead mother’s ex lover, but the most withholding and passively+actively violent character in the show, who she knows to be sexually abusing rei, the teenaged clone of his dead wife– all while ritsuko herself neglects+dehumanizes rei, save for the bare minimum required to maintain rei’s shape.
maya follows ritsuko–almost blindly–defers to ritsuko’s judgment, listens 2 how ritsuko discusses the pilots (always as objects, clinically, things 2 be quantified and studied 4 her project), is able 2 look past this, enable it. we know maya is similarly a child of the post-2nd impact world, and all that baggage we know it to carry despite all appearances 2 the contrary. if ritsumaya is canon (it is), then u have to work a lot off what we know abt ritsuko 2 determine maya’s character. what kind of person would ritsuko be drawn to? what needs are not being met in gendo that maya would fulfill? how does a woman who is imprisoned her mountains of deceit+secrets+planned betrayal, by her own selfish desires + pathologies, treat someone who might offer her care, based on how we know ritsuko 2 behave in show? how does a relationship look when one party is lying, who knows that nothing matters bc theyre all going 2 die? how does ritsuko dehumanize maya, how does maya resist that? how would someone like maya respond 2 this, maya who is prudent+fastidious+dedicated+focused+a genius in her own right, if not a little naive. how does ritsuko’s cynicism meet maya’s optimism? how do we see that same cynicism act as a corrupting force in maya’s tolerance for the inhumane?
i mean, realistically, they dont behave like saints lol. and theres an element of misogyny in projecting+assuming that bc they’re women, they are emotional and serving and passive and sexless. like those characteristics r hangups of misogyny and patriarchal conceptions of womanhood… and yet this is how i see ppl online pay lip service / wave empty gestures in their direction. (”i like femslash! look!” [presents the most boring, flat, missing-the-mark empty description abt the 1 f/f ship after rt’ing/rb’ing copious amounts of fetish art abt their obviously preferred m/m ship). give me a break. id rather u just outright ignore them and say stg misogynistic abt femslash not being as compelling, since thats what everyones actions say anyway lol. (and just as an aside, i think its worth interrogating in ourselves the way we respond 2 our own internalized homophobia/lesbophobia, by looking @ or considering how our own internalized beliefs abt the lesbian erotic become translated as de facto predatory or pornographic. i think sometimes this impulse 2 sanitize lesbians is done out of fear of acting out patriarchy. but like… thats something to work thru, not avoid by playing into the very tropes that do similar/analogous harm…?)
and i do think theres a connection btwn the flattening of women characters so that they’re “good representation” and “safe” (whatever the vocab is) and lack of engagement w them. no one wants to take time to actually look @ the complexities of woman characters. “they’re written poorly, idc” no, i dont believe thats the case for every piece of fiction, and it’s absolutely not the case w evangelion lol.
we’re drawn 2 stories that show us our ugly parts, that build tension + find resolution (and many times that resolution isnt perfect, or what we expected). we want 2 express and see an expression of our anxiety+hurts+grievances, to RESONATE w something. we use fiction 2 engage w our misery and find new meaning from there. the way lesbians r written precludes that. how can u find expression in something that doesnt exist? no one has a perfect relationship. if ur drawn to a show like evangelion, that practically kicks u over the head w the violence of intimacy, why would u assume that, just bc theyre lesbians, they are somehow exempt from human pain? iddddddddk.
its just funny…..like u have 1 lesbian ship that everyone pays lip service to + tweets/posts empty platitudes abt being a ritsumaya fan / ritsumaya hive / “ritsumaya will win” bc theres this perception that lesbianism is politically “good” (diff convo) and makes u “on the right side of history” and then their blogs r just entirely kawoshin, w the most chaste/sanitized/Saintly representation of ritsumaya, which has been recycled ad nauseum all yr bc no one wants 2 actually engage+think thru+perform the labor of characterizing+constructing women characters w all their concomitant complexities and misery, in a show whose cast is predominantly women, whose depth 100% owes itself 2 the many types of experiences of womanhood. give me a break
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