𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙧

[mmkyung-blog]

ｂｅｄｌａｍ   ６：１０ ｐｍ ．     YOSUL ANNUAL COMMENCEMENT PARTY

tw: slight body horror, some descriptive horrifying imagery, existentialism, suicide mention honestly this is really dark subject matter my dudes, take care if you’re sensitive.

it’s a tunnel, nothing but endlessness, the long black of nothing ; like blindness, even with eyes wide open there’s nothing to be seen. trying to tunnel deeply into any emotion that wasn’t simplistic, negative, anything that would make him fucking feel something ( anything, god he just wanted to love the people who loved him in return, why was that so wrong ? ) it was nullified. always. there was always nothing. his mother told him that the world didn’t revolve around what others thought of him, so he should feel free and live his life however made him happy. he wanted to tell her, but mother. i don’t feel anything at all. but how could he rip away the curtains of his stage play in front of her ? the only person he came close to caring for ? an act of nobility, of duty, responsibility, maybe a biological imperative towards protecting those who protect us. for too many reasons, he poured his time into imitating love towards his mother ( towards his friends, his cousins ) and god, it’s so sad but, it’s not even exhausting to live like that. it’s just what he’s used to. his automatic response towards those who express positive emotions his way, a pavlovian tick to make those people understand it isn’t them, it’s him ( it’s just me something is wrong with me... )

it’s piercing. it’s genuinely agonizing, like being torn asunder, his body can barely handle the pressure that bursts inside of him out of no where, from nothing. parts of him suddenly feel full that he hadn’t realized did before and it’s so much that it’s blinding. he’s left emotionally battered, like being pummel, all senses in overload with emotions he had, quite literally, never felt before. it leave him feeling so raw, so exhausted, that he wobbles on his feet. props his hand against the wall where he was lingering near, preparing to grab a drink and stalk down cheol and seol for some one on one time ( no point in being family if you can’t embarrass someone ) he still hasn’t recovered. whoever the fuck it was he laid eyes on, he doesn’t even know who, a woman. she had been tall, auburn hair, he didn’t recognize her face ( an alumni ? ) he clutches at the wall and fuck maybe the whole room disappears when she does. moving a little too fast into the throng and why the hell does he want to chase her. who the fuck is she ? the impact of emotion thrashes into him, heart frankly torn from his chest. and the moment his legs threaten to carry him away without a single warning, he bursts like a flooded pipe holding back too much tension. it could have been his blood on the ground but it’s from his eyes ; the hot torrent of tears, one single sob before it chokes off like he had taken an ax and cut it off at the source. heaves with an inhale that catches on every one of his ribs and sputters inside of his throat like it’s trying to crawl back up his wind pipe. is this what everyone else feels ? it’s not real ( he knows it isn’t and that makes it worse ) is this what his mother felt ? ( he might be sick rather than cry ) (( he doesn’t know what’s more preferred ))

he wants to kiss her ( who the fuck even is she ) he wants to fold her into his arms, a cradle against his heart ( yes it still beats, it’s never been this way before; so fast and hard, it hurts slamming against his ribs ) kiss every inch of her with an intent of love that scares him. if she touched his jaw, laid a pretty hand there, he would cry again, he knew he would ( one single touch from her would make everything go away ) (( could she fix him? all the problems disappeared when he saw her, didn’t they ? ))

he’s never felt complete before....

it’s never stopped feeling ... nothing, before.

he glances, makes eye contact with everyone he can. maybe someone will kill him and put him out of his misery. if this is what love feels like... han kyung doesn’t know how the fuck he plans to go without it again... he doesn’t want to. he can’t. the sobs fight to break free but he contains them with his hand to his chest like his heart might fight its way out and he has to smother it down. and then he just shuts down. maybe she’ll come pick him up where he stands with a nearly vacant ( eroded down to smooth because it’s so full of meaning it short circuits ) stare across the room. 

if this is love...

[mmkyung-blog]

seonchan‌ :

his hand reaches out in a form of impulse. not actually spreading the cards or cutting the deck, instead chan just draws the singular top card. just one card right off of the top as he makes eye contact with the professor with a light smile. his gaze darts down and he expects to see suit of cups, maybe pentacles, he expects a number of possibilities. because he hadn’t expected to see either of the professors again. breaking curfew and inter-house mingling doesn’t count when you’re staff does it ? but it’s still funny and it still subverts his expectations. the card that lands face up on the desk next to his charms textbook is major arcana and it comes with a crawling numbness into his fingers. why is that ? he doesn’t understand. the card, JUSTICE, major arcana, reversed: + dishonesty, + hiding one’s true self. divination should just fucking tell him what it means. he yearns to pull another card but he swiftly checks the motivation.

“heya professor,” he begins slowly, leans back in his chair to soften his presence. “i was just doing my charms assignment, coincidentally.” a moment passes and he almost doesn’t call attention to it, but then, he can’t resist. what’s a boy to do? he can’t help himself. “come here with professor han saetbyeol often ?” a smile that’s meant to be unassuming and nonthreatening, “i don’t think i’ve seen you here before, though.” 

it’s with great effort and greater fortitude that he had dropped off his coworker safely into her staff dorm room despite the two of them being so piss drunk he could barely think straight. maybe it’s because he doesn’t need to think about feelings, just like a hollow puppet ( it’s what they call silver linings ) that he manages at all. he doesn’t have an emotional drunken outburst threatening to seep through and ruin his perfectly good night. no love confession that beg him stay in her room after he drops her off. just a loud static like someone had turned on a broken television inside of his mind. flickering, disjointed images and white noise that left his blinks slow, lips pulled into a twisted sneer of focus ( yes a sneer, like walking around was unpleasant ) (( he should never, ever let saetbyeol allow this to happen again, at least one of the two of them needed to be reasonable, damn it )) so it’s with great attention to the way his feet move that he stumbles into the ju jak commons ( he almost forgot why he was here ) until he spots seonchan. it’s easy to remember the boy known for his divination, in all the ways a kwak would be, without the stigma. a good student, all around. not the smartest, or the most participant ( okay maybe more average than good, but that’s more than enough for kyung honestly ) and as kyung makes eye contact, he leans in a little until, like a microscope, the image becomes clear. kyung doesn’t even notice the hands on the card, that would require too much presence of mind that he doesn't have to spare ( it’s busy keeping him upright )

“oh,” it isn’t a greeting, it isn’t kind, it isn’t warm and jovial like usual, it’s flat like a robotic delivery from a bad actor. “hey...” he tacks on when he remembers that being drunk doesn’t mean he can forget. “charms are good.” he nods agreeably, charms, his only love. he wanders closer to look down at the text book approvingly, before remembering that seonchan still exists and kyung is still a teacher, after all. “do you want some help?” his words are slurred and that’s so damn unfortunate because he grimaces in some slight embarrassment ( but still can’t do a damn thing to fix it ) “saelty-salty-saetbyeol is in her room,” he clears his throat, like the inebriation is a blockage in his throat he can just so simply remove ( it doesn’t work ) “this is the common room.” he explains the obvious. “why are you in the common room?”

[mmkyung-blog]

ｓｕｒｎａｍｅ:    Ｈ Ａ Ｎ 

canon  HALF-BLOOD .   known for charm & spirit . branches  2  members  3  （  @mmcheol​  @mmseol​  @mmkyung​ .  ） symbolism   the fox . the battle between one’s nature & personal aspirations or will . fighting spirit . mischievousness & what lies beneath . resentment . transcendance . the dogmatic need to protect ones family, and self. 

[sagamemes]

hogwarts au sentences.   let’s put those harry potter aus into good use. contains 40+ dialogue starters relating to hogwarts — some mention different houses and the occasional canon event, but a lot can be used by anybody. feel free to switch around pronouns, diction, and the like to make them more suitable for your muse’s mouth.

“ can you cast a patronus? ”

“ i saw muggle textbooks when i was visiting family for the holidays, and honestly? sure, i could maybe die falling off the stairs if i had a sleepwalking habit, but at least i’m not doing algebra right now. ”

“ do you think a dog animagi could have puppies? ”

“ how did you explain to your friends why you were switching schools? ”

“ sorry, all the other carriages are full, i’m sitting here whether you want it or not. ”

“ i wonder if there are people who can speak parseltongue but with like… bunnies. ”

“ i’m tired, and i want to go to bed, and i’ve been sitting here, trying to figure it out for like an hour, save me: what has a head but no body, but does have a tail? ”

“ what do threstals look like? ”

“ do you ever wash your cauldron? ”

“ trying to sneak into the forbidden section three times in a row is either the most badass or the most nerdy thing you’ve ever done. ”

“ if i go to hospital wing, i have to explain how i got it. i need to solve this with a spell. ”

“ no, i just never realised other people see the carriages being pulled by thin air. ”

“ when did you get the dark mark? ”

“ SOMEBODY CATCH MY TOAD! ”

“ mudblood. ”

“ who was the guy your boggart turned into? ”

“ where did you learn that? ”

“ sorry, but you couldn’t pay me to put my name in that thing. ”

“ do you still have that leaf in your mouth? ”

“ you’re the most injury-prone [quidditch position] i’ve ever met. ”

“ congratulations, head [boy/girl/pupil]. ”

“ imagine being a straight couple right now. ”

“ i’m going to have to fight my parents. ”

“ sorry, is this your owl/toad/cat? [they’re] beautiul. ”

“ do you think you could sneak to the astronomy tower with me tonight? ”

“ i actually haven’t asked anyone for the yule ball with me. ”

“ [name] got petrified, didn’t [they]? i’m sorry. ”

“ have you met the new DADA professor yet? how was it? ”

“ next time [name] pushes you again, i swear to god i’m hexing [their] arse. ”

“ i ate something and now my face is purple. i’m NOT coming out! ”

“ it’s vinegar. i knocked on the wrong barrel. ”

“ don’t look at me like that, i’m just trying to steal your body heat. it’s cold down here, okay? ”

“ how the hell can someone like you be in [house]? ”

“ come to think of it, i don’t think i’ve ever seen a ginger slytherin. ”

“ i didn’t even know i was afraid of heights before i came to this bloody school. ”

“ finding places to cuddle in would be a lot easier if we were at the same house. ”

“ are both of your parents muggles? ”

“ when you said you wanted to go to hogsmeade together with me, did you mean like… a date kind of ‘together’? ”

“ i wonder how many peole have banged in the room of requirements. ”

“ why must the plants sing? ”

“ sorry, you’re not getting the password from me. ”

“ have fun in potions. try not to punch anyone. ”

“ of course i’m fine. i mean, who wouldn’t want to be told they’re going to have a painful, grim death, on their first divination class? ”

“ are all [ravenclaws/gryffindors/slytherins] assholes, or is that just you? ”

“ dude, it was definitely two feet on vampires. how screwed are you? ”

“ how are we playing? classic or bavardian rules? ”

[mmkyung-blog]

hello it’s a brand new world, and i have brought you the oldest man of all, professor han kyung (because we have 2 professor hans ((including professor han saetbyeol)) so, this is the dumb tall one) i’m sky, but yall maybe know me, because i write for @mmjaeho, and @mmjungmi. basically, i’m the one who’s always out here flooding the dash and also the one who writes all of the oldies 😔 ( ps. pls read his about and stats page on his blog if possible bc that’s where his actual character information is beyond: *well, in summary, as u can see here on this graph, is he an idiot*. ok thank you have a nice day! ily tyts )

some stuff

31 years of age ( this makes him basically ancient RIP ) of the han family (canon: han a), a professor of yosul teaching charms at the moment. he is the house master of house hyeon mu, and the staff advisor for the student council because he has no life.

lives on campus and is also really active with his students, from both club activities, and just always around and known for being reachable and generally well liked. he is an exceptionally ~ popular ~ teacher, both because of his good looks and literally dangerous charm ( accredited to his heritage, and gumiho charm ), but also just because he’s honestly a helpful, caring teacher tbh.

dad jokes, dork energy, soft smiles, ‘no cussin in my house’ ( no like seriously, he doesn’t ever use bad language catch him out here like ‘what in the heck, what the nimbus 3000 are you kids doing???’ ), sunshine or savage there isn’t much in between. this teacher took the anti-favoritism pledge ( and will never cut you a break or look at you more fondly than other students ) and you will not convince him to be otherwise ( but you’re welcome to try )

you can call upon him any time you need to through his classroom; he has this charmed crystal ball that sits on his desk, similar to something you’d see used in archaic divination or just for decoration, picking it up alerts him through a bracelet charm he wears at all times. if he isn’t busy he’ll usually just pop in nearby shortly after.

infamous for like, weird, out of the box teaching styles that are anti-introvert with lots of group activities and front of the class things😔 he remembers students names too so you can’t get away with shit.

a straight up mama’s boy. develops no strong opinions on anyone else though… he doesn’t fold into the blood purists/elitists lot, and he is the type to have 2000 friends but only like 1 out of that 2000 knows anything about him that isn’t just surface level.

he stays on campus like all professors. has a this shabby, angry looking ruddy maine coon cat named root beer float, he swears the cat is harmless but… there’s rumors. sometimes the cat accompanies him to class btw unless you have cat allergies so be prepared for that.

because he is head of his house ( hyeon mu ) he is response for all hyeon mu 1 - 3 years whereabouts, safety, and concerns. he directly deals with them, papa han out here.

he’s got a little bit of a fan club at school because of his good looks and charm, and there’s also always rumors about him, his whereabouts and who he’s dating. he cannot escape them and doesn’t even try, also doesn’t address them directly because that’s like fuel to the fire.

plots bunnies or things to expand on in dms

favorite teacher ( he is your favorite sexy brain nerd man )

least favorite teacher ( like who does this man think he is fr )

giving you extra lessons for charms because you’re failing and need #help ( pls professor if i fail this class i just have to take it again & do you really wanna see me next block????? )

his is a very close friend of your parents and/or family personally and man this is awkward, because you specifically remember the way he almost started a food fight at last years seotdal geumeum right in front of you, god and all y’alls ancestors

he will help you find your dream ( probably )

gimme more family friend and that weird uncle energy plots pls

fake fight with him in the hallway the exact way a teacher shouldn’t be doing, so he can use a spell to turn your hair green and give you a permanent mustache for the day bc ur a brat and he’s not afraid of u, u punk

you’re talking to him about the fact that you got sorted by the gat into this weird house and really you wonder if this is where you belong and he just gives you an I-Feel-That-Lil-Homie look. deep discussions ensue.

he’s basically your hyung/oppa away from hyung/opa or the hyung/oppa you never had. he basically just spoils and takes care of you well ( he is an only child and will absolutely free of charge treat you like the sibling he never had )

you’re interested in charms, a charms mentor or going into teaching/charms as a profession.

oh, you’re house hyeon mu, that’s just a plot in itself tbh, he knows all of yall youngins and probably teases you relentlessly

pls just cultivate more platonic, character developing threads with me. he is a good guy who will have lots of fun with you.

[ilysminho]

precious minho appa

[orcses]

[jxn-xoxo]

[lukas-musings]

      This is 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒…

                     This is in 𝙎𝙀𝙇𝙁-𝘿𝙀𝙁𝙀𝙉𝙎𝙀    !    

                                I thought you had the sense                                       To see 𝑡𝘩𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩 that

[dinuguan]