“Shane and Ilya get a call in the dead of the night, right before Shane’s supposed to go into the finals.” OH and OF COURSE there’s only one bed wherever Canada tucked them away for safety. <3 make them suffer <3
There is very much only one bed. Shane and Ilya are living the consequences of making their story “we are in such passionate gay love that we will kill ourselves over it.” No one thinks those guys are sleeping in separate beds. And also Shane does not trust them to not boot Ilya out onto the street or hand him over to Russian officials while Shane is asleep and unable to punch cops. He is boiling in his own stress right now because his only play is very much “if you do not help my boyfriend right now I will make sure I get killed on foreign soil which means YOU have to go back and face the Canadian public as the people who got Shane Hollander killed on foreign soil” and hoping they are more afraid of that than. Putin. So he’s initially worried they’ll just sort of dump Ilya if he’s not physically there to cause them problems. And Ilya is no goddamn help because that fucker will absolutely let himself be taken quietly while Shane is asleep in another room because he doesn’t want Shane Hollander dying for him in Russia. They are sharing a room and the bed is small.
And there is only going to be one bed for a while. Again, they are not getting off this train. Every single time they are at the same event—All Stars, Boston v. Montreal Games, the NHL awards, Christmas at the White House because they’re low key in the same social circle as the Obamas now—they’re going to be sharing a room. People are going to assume they want to stay together from now on, and if it leaks that they’re choosing to sleep separately, they’re going to have to deal with a front page headline reading TROUBLE IN PARADISE: GAY COUPLE THAT EXPECTED ENTIRE WORLD TO HELP THEM BE TOGETHER CHOOSES NOT TO BE TOGETHER DURING ONE OF THE FIVE DAYS THEY WORK IN THE SAME CITY. Like it. It’d be a mess. They’re going to have to deal with there only being one bed while they figure things out
I adore Snapping Birch and the crashout summer au has made me laugh to the point of tears, but for some reason the Sochi outing au has me in its hooks!
Anyways, one of the things I keep thinking about are those 2-minute personal profiles that tv networks play during the Olympics about high profile athletes right before they compete or between events? Like the ones all about how when they were 5 they built a little olympic podium out of cardboard boxes in their backyard and would have their own medal ceremony everytime their national anthem played, or like, 2 years ago, they suffered a devastating hamstring injury that ruined their chances of Chosen Sport forever, but they trained and trained and trained and now they're thriving in New Sport.
Well, they had to have one about The Greatest Rivalry Ever, right, all queued up and ready to go for if and when Canada and Russia faced off, which of course didn't happen when Russia lost to Latvia. But then the outing! And so all of a sudden some poor journalism intern who hasn't slept in 3 weeks is recutting it to make it all about Gay Hockey Romeo & Juliet, and it's like 95% the same, except that the voiceover audibly changes partway through.
So that's the fun part! But then the not so fun part is that assuming the outing happens before the hockey finals, at some point when they're out of immediate danger and the dust is settling a bit, they realize that Canada has gone on to medal without Shane. And that devastates them both in different ways.
Ilya, because he's convinced that if only Shane had been able to play in those final however many games rather than having to run away to the embassy with his situationship and nothing else but the cozy Canada fleece on his back, Canada might have won the gold. Not only did he destroy his own country's chances, he also cost Shane *his*.
Meanwhile, Shane, who has only ever wanted to be percieved for his hockey skills, realizes that his first-ever Olympic medal is going to be forever known as That Time He Had To Flee The Country (Because He's Gay). And he gets his medal, of course, and maybe it's even awarded to him in some sort of honorary ceremony but it's all just one more thing he has to grit his teeth to get through.
See I couldn’t agree more, and I think the best way to maximize the angst of this moment is to make Shane’s exclusion from the finals the direct cost of getting Ilya out of Russia.
Ilya would be an incredibly precarious position even after he gets in the car, mostly because they should not have let him in that car. This is now like three different international crises in a trench coat.
I think Russia came up with an excuse to keep Ilya in the country very quickly after the leak. Again, they can’t just say “you specifically cannot leave the country because we want to hate crime you” to Ilya because it violates international freedom of movement, and they’re still trying to play somewhat nice on the international stage. There are way too many eyes on them right now to just be committing human rights violations on main. They need an excuse to stop Ilya from just speed running an exit over the border.
I think Shane and Ilya are informed within an hour of them leaving the Olympic Village that Ilya is being investigated for drug trafficking. After he disappeared, his brother went into his room at their home to see if he had maybe gone there. Out of concern for him, of course. He found a large stash of heroin amongst Ilya’s things instead and felt obligated to report it.
He is the police, after all.
And Shane is like. That is such fucking bullshit. His brother just so happened to decide to look for Ilya at a house 20 fucking hours away from where he should actually be?? And he just so happened to find drugs that Ilya has never once tested positive for? Ilya gets drug tested constantly through the NHL. They’d know if he was on fucking heroin.
He doesn’t need money so why the fuck would he risk drug trafficking? Why would he do it out of his fucking childhood bedroom that he hasn’t been to in fuck knows how long? It is such an obvious frame job that it’s embarrassing for Russia. He didn’t fucking do it.
They’re assured that Ilya hasn’t been charged with anything yet. Given how high profile this just became, Russia is investigating this very carefully.
But Ilya should not try to leave town while the investigation is ongoing.
They can read between the lines. Russia was going to arrest Ilya until they made international headlines for the most romantic bullshit anyone had ever seen. Ilya Rozanov cradling Shane Hollander’s face between his hands and begging him to get in the car is now the headline news in almost every nation on the planet. They’ve backed off for right now while they try to figure out how to navigate this in light of the international attention bearing down on them.
But they are going to arrest and charge Ilya if they see him at an airport. They’re not quite at the point where they’re willing to just let him walk.
America enters the chat within a few hours of the leak. Canadian officials have figured out that Shane is putting a gun to his own head and is purposefully escalating the biggest scandal in the history of the Olympics to try to force them to save Ilya too and are low key pissed. But America has a lot invested in this situation resolving with Ilya Rozanov walking off a plane and directly onto American soil, hand in hand with Shane Hollander.
Like. At this point, J.J., Carter, and Scott have stumbled their way through their opening overtures of supporting Hollanov. They have had absolutely no time for planning or advance discussion. In the heat of the moment, they just jump straight from getting Shane and Ilya into the car to outright flouting Russia’s anti-LGBTQ+ propaganda laws.
They have all vaguely implied that they knew about Hollanov already and could not possibly ship it harder. Two beautiful men with beautiful souls share a beautiful love and these #allies could not support them more. The American delegation had to bodily remove them from the scene and confine them to their dorm rooms so that Carter Vaughn would stop fucking announcing to the entire fucking world that he knows soulmates exist because he’s seen Shane and Ilya together while Scott Hunter nervously stands beside him nodding and saying “I. I can’t even think of how I would say it better myself. That was so beautiful.”
So America already has two Olympians entrenched in this scandal. Ilya Rozanov plays for an American team. And it was already embroiled in the controversy around queer rights at the Olympics before anyone got outed. People wanted America to boycott the Olympics, and it refused, but it did send openly queer athletes as part of its delegation as a condemnation of Russia’s actions.
The president’s cabinet is staring down the barrel of either the worst case scenario or the best political capital to ever fall in their lap.
The footage of Shane Hollander sprinting to find Ilya Rozanov is being watched across the world right now. The footage of Ilya Rozanov begging Shane Hollander to save himself and Shane refusing is being watched across the world right now. This has escalated to a matter of global concern in record fucking time.
If this story ends with these two men in Russian detention or dead, then America, Canada, Russia, and the entire Olympics committee are going to be under fucking firestorm. People are going to be furious that Russia was allowed to host in the first place. They are going to be furious that more wasn’t done to protest the games before they began. And they are going to be furious that more wasn’t done to save these two men who have just acted out a tragic love story on the global stage.
But if this story has a happy ending?
This is the kind of bullshit inspiration core movies are made of. Hollywood is already working day and night on the fucking movie script, and they need an ending. And, again, American democrats are on a tear for queer rights. If they play this right, they may be able to actually ride the wave of public sympathy Shane and Ilya just set off right into codifying gay marriage into law.
Before the day is out, Shane and Ilya have gotten a phone call from the actual fucking president of the United States informing them that they’ve inspired a lot of people with their bravery. There’s a world behind them that’s moving heaven and earth to get them back home safely.
But they’ve been very gently warned that there’s a lot of people who will be looking to them to set an example after this. He wants them to be aware of the public scrutiny they’ll be facing once they get them home, so they can be prepared.
Shane and Ilya read between the lines. They don’t know if the US government has figured out that they’re bullshitting the romance. Shane is personally unlocking a new fear called “did the President of the United States patriot act my sexts?”
But they can pick up on the concern underlying the words. This isn’t going away once they get out of Russia. They are the international face of gay rights whether they like it or not. The narrative has already been set and they cannot easily break from it. If the world comes together to save them, then they’re going to need to prove to the world that they’re worth all this trouble in the aftermath.
I think that’s the moment that it really sinks in for them that they are fucking hitched now. They’re in a committed relationship with each other, for better or for worse. This is the story and they have to fucking sell it. And they may have to sell it for the rest of their lives.
America’s interest in the conflict gives Shane and Ilya an extra layer of protection. Russia is less likely to just outright make a move on Ilya, and Canada’s less likely to just put Ilya out on the street the second Shane lets go of his hand. The fact that America is actively spearheading negotiations would give them some breathing room. Like. At this point, the president has sent a plane to fly Ilya out of the country and into America’s patriotic, star-spangled embrace. They are just negotiating what it’s going to cost for Russia to let Ilya get onto that fucking plane.
I think that would be enough of a safety net for Shane to feel safe enough to go back and compete in the Games.
Again, Ilya’s the one who has to worry about Russian detention, unless Shane actually does just go and punch a fucking cop, in which case. He should be very worried. But Ilya would be safe enough without Shane physically on top of him if he was surrounded by Canadian and American diplomats and had the direct reassurances of a world leader that he would not be dumped on the side of the road while Shane’s away. And I don’t see Canada wanting to give up their Olympian’s ability to compete in the Games lightly. That looks bad for them. And Russia can’t just say “we are so so mad at you for sucking off our favorite hockey boy so we won’t let you compete anymore” like it is not their fucking decision. This is the fucking Olympics. And the Olympics would want to set a precedent of protecting Olympians’ ability to compete. I think you can feasibly have Shane go back for another match.
Shane would be taken with an escort. He is told in no uncertain terms that he is not to run from his escort. It is implied that his escort has been given permission to taser him and claim it was accidental if he tries to run from his escort.
Shane. Thinks that’s fair.
Do not send him back for the final match. Make it the semi-finals. I haven’t decided what country would be the best one to have them be playing, but it’s definitely not America.
I think the game goes really poorly at first. The Canadian team is losing when it shouldn’t be. The entire team is disjointed and shaken from the news of Shane and Ilya. They aren’t playing as seamlessly as they should.
Halfway through the game, Shane gets attacked on the ice.
For maximum potential, the person who attacks him should have Russian ties. Either he plays in the KHL or he has family living in Russia. Russia is going to disavow the attack up and fucking down, but people will always wonder if it happened on Russia’s orders.
Shane just gets fucking bodied into the ice, but the attack doesn’t stop there. Because the guy kicks towards his neck.
Shane barely gets his arm up in time to intercept the skate’s blade before it slices open his throat.
There’s a massive bleeding gash across his forearm. Shane’s still on the ground. And the guy is rearing back for another kick.
J.J. tackles him into the ice like a linebacker.
J.J. goes down with him and lands on top of this guy. He rips the guy’s helmet off so he can beat the shit out of him better.
This guy wants to go after Shane? Then he’s going to learn what happens when you go after someone’s teammate in motherfucking Montreal.
It turns into the first outright brawl in the history of men’s Olympic ice hockey.
It escalates into both teams beating the ever loving fuck out of each other. J.J.’s trying to beat this guy’s head clean through the ice. His teammates go after J.J. And the rest of Team Canada immediately starts throwing the fuck down to keep J.J. and Shane safe.
It is absolute chaos. People are leaving the bench to join the fight. Refs are struggling to pull players off of each other. The entire game has to be stopped so they can figure out how the fuck to handle these penalties.
And also so they can clean Shane’s blood off of the ice.
During the break in the game, Shane’s wound is triaged and, critically, he refuses to leave for full medical treatment. The wound is bleeding like a motherfucker, but the blade missed the vein.
Shane tells them to pack the fucking wound and let him back out there.
Team Canada then has a historic comeback.
A sense of nationalism overrides the other players’ homophobia. They have a real “he may be a faggot but he’s a CANADIAN faggot” moment.
Absolutely everyone locks the fuck in. They move in sync. They play one of the best games of hockey of any of their lives.
And Shane Hollander scores the game-winning goal.
He and J.J. embrace in the center of the ice when they win. Someone drapes the goddamn Canadian flag around their shoulders. There is a photo of Shane and J.J. with their foreheads pressed together, shrouded in the symbol of Canada, flanked by their teammates, with Shane Hollander’s bloody hand holding up the edge of the flag that will one day be competing with the photo of Ilya begging him to get in the car for a goddamn Pulitzer Prize. It is so historic that Shane Hollander is about to end up as an answer on the Canadian naturalization test a second fucking time.
Like. This needs to be the most inspirational, climatic moment anyone has ever fucking seen. It needs to be straight out of fucking Hollywood.
Because after this moment, you could huff the spirit of Canadian nationalism around the men’s ice hockey team and Shane Hollander specifically like it is fucking cocaine. The entire world would be rooting for them. It would go down in history as one of the most goddamn electric moments in the history of the fucking Olympics.
And it would make Russia start to wonder what happens if a gold medal ends up around Shane Hollander’s throat.
They have their own people to worry about. Those people have just been sold Ilya Rozanov as their ideal for years. Those people had more queer rights just a year ago and some of those people are very upset about the government starting to eat away at those same rights. And hockey is directly tied to Russia’s sense of national identity and pride. Those people can be inspired by Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov’s goddamn cinematic, hockey-themed moments of gay love and human resilience just as much as the rest of the world can.
So what exactly happens in the minds of the Russian public if a gay hockey player who sucked off Russia’s own once-favorite player wins the Olympic gold on Russian soil?
Russia doesn’t know how the finals are going to shake out. But they think Canada has a big chance of winning it all. They think Shane Hollander has a big chance of being the guy who scores the golden goal.
So maybe Russia decides that they want Shane Hollander gone more than they want Ilya Rozanov to stay.
I think Shane and Ilya get a call in the dead of the night, right before Shane’s supposed to go into the finals. The plane is fueled. They have been given the green light by Russia. They have a few hours to get the fuck out of this country and never come back.
And the only way Ilya gets to leave on that plane is if Shane Hollander is with him.
They are going to say that Shane experienced unexpected complications from his injury and can’t compete. He’s headed home for further medical treatment. And that is the cost of them letting Ilya on that plane. Shane Hollander has three hours to get the fuck out of their airspace or Ilya will be charged with drug trafficking, and he will not be allowed to leave.
Shane takes the deal on the spot.
This moment is going to torment Ilya after. The last time that they spoke before Russia, Shane told him that he’s been dreaming of the Olympics his whole life. And Shane sacrificing that dream is going to be the cost of saving Ilya’s life.
And it’s going to be a cost that Shane keeps having to pay. People do not buy that Shane actually left because of his injury. The public consensus is very much that he dropped out so Russia would let his boyfriend go.
There are going to be people that blame Shane Hollander specifically for Canada losing the gold. They are going to say that he picked Ilya over his own country. And it will be treated like a betrayal. Shane’s going to receive a lot of criticism for it.
What are Yuna and David doing in the Sochi outing au? Is Yuna able to get in touch with Shane or anyone connected to him? What kind of hell are they going through?
I’m toying with the idea that Shane refuses to speak to them.
In the immediate aftermath of Ilya and Shane getting in the car, their situation is going to be very precarious. Like. They should not have let Ilya in that car. Ilya’s continued chance at survival is brought to you by Shane Hollander’s chocolate brown eyes and the fact that he’s in a parasocial relationship with an entire country.
It is fucking tense, after, and success is by no means assured. Like. Ilya almost gets fucking kicked out on the street once the car arrives because they are fucking around that hard with starting an international disaster by bringing him. The only reason why they get as far as they do is because Shane makes it very clear that he is going wherever Ilya goes, including prison. He will punch a fucking cop.
This is the biggest scandal in the history of the Olympics, and Shane is purposefully escalating it to try and force his own country’s hand into interfering with another fucking country’s Olympian. Like this strategy is low key fucking insane.
America needs a few hours before it makes its own interests clear, and Canadian officials are getting increasingly pissed at Shane for actively trying to make things worse. Like. Shane’s strategy is basically to say “you get Ilya out too or I will make sure I die in Russian prison with him” and the not unlikely end result to that strategy may end up being “okay have fun dying in Russian prison with him.”
And I think Shane would really struggle with facing his parents knowing what he was doing. Because they would ask him to do whatever it takes to come home. And he can’t promise them that.
He also doesn’t want to lie to them. And he can’t talk to them freely from fucking Russia. He just can’t have the conversation he needs to have with them right now. I think maybe he decides he can’t face them like this.
In my mind, Shane is like, an hour and a half deep into a telephone argument with some fucker who’s a few steps down from the fucking prime minister that’s basically just a thinly veiled back-and-forth of “stop fucking trying to leverage the public’s love for you into an international incident you son of a bitch” and “uuuhh you made me politically relevant when I was fucking 16 and now I can’t go outside without causing a mob scene, time to see some return on that.” The conversation is Not Going Well. Ilya’s about to have a fucking stroke because he is becoming increasingly aware of the fact that Shane seriously means it when he says he’s not leaving this country without Ilya and that stupid fucking Vegas balcony kiss from rookie year now may actually be the death of Shane Hollander.
The dude from the prime ministers office says his parents are here and would like the speak to him.
They physically sent a car to go get David and Yuna Hollander so they could try to talk some sense into their son. And Shane realizes that’s why his parents must be there. They’re going to tell him to come home.
So he refuses to speak to them. He hangs up the phone.
And Ilya is like. What the fuck?
Ilya has no idea how Shane’s parents must be taking this. The sum total of his interactions with those people has been saying “this one’s going up” to Shane’s mom when he was on his way to blow her son and that is fucking it. Shane never really talked about them to him.
Did they even know that Shane was…?
And Shane’s like. No. They didn’t.
This phone can call out too, right?
Shane can’t handle a conversation with his parents right now. But he still wants to get a message to them, in case.
Well, in case he doesn’t make it home.
If his parents are sitting in an office with the prime minister’s people, then they’re not at home to answer the phone. So he calls his parents’ house so he can leave them a voicemail.
He calls. Please leave a message. Beep.
He tells him he’s sorry he has to do it like this. He knows they’re gonna want him to come home and he, uh. He can’t promise them that right now. He can’t. He’s so sorry for that.
Uh. He’s gay.
They have no idea how sorry he is that they found out this way. He really, really wishes he told them any other way, but. He wants them to know that he tried. He really, really tried. He just. He couldn’t help it.
He’s going to try to come home. He is. But. He can’t leave without Ilya. And maybe that means he doesn’t leave, and… he’s sorry if it means that. He’s sorry about so many things. He really hopes they can forgive him one day.
He wants them to know he loves them. Just remember that, okay? No matter how this turns out.
Getting that voicemail fucking destroys Yuna and David, let me tell you.
They have absolutely no idea what the fuck is happening. They found out that their son was kissed by Ilya Rozanov when both men were in fucking Russia. They don’t even know for sure that he’s gay yet. All they know from that video that their son, age 19, was at a work event when his coworker shoved him against a wall and kissed him for an extended period of time, and at the end their son forced that guy off of him and stormed off. They don’t know if their son is gay or a victim of sexual battery and also the immediate follow up is for the other guy’s team to announce that a favorite point of conversation amongst them is how much they all want to fuck their son, and the only one who doesn’t participate is the guy who actually kissed him, because he is straight.
And then Shane goes fucking missing in Russia.
Like. David and Yuna have been through the fucking wringer. There was a several hour period where they had no idea if Shane was alive. When they finally see him again, he is on TV getting cradled tenderly by Wall Kiss Boy as he tearfully begs Shane to get in the car and go to safety and Shane fucking refuses. Then they get informed by the government of the country they live in that they need to convince their son to not commit suicide by police state if something happens to the boyfriend that no one knew he had until 30 seconds ago. And then he won’t fucking talk to them, and they come home to that fucking voicemail.
David and Yuna are locking the fuck in when they’re not having fucking panic attacks. Yuna is leveraging every single contact she has to make sure the news is broadcasting Shane Hollander Nostalgia Core 24 hours a day.
Again, Canada watched Shane grow up. In many ways, he is the nation’s beloved son, and Yuna knows that if she reminds the public of that constantly, they will fucking riot to bring him home.
She is doing everything she can to make the nation’s love for Shane Hollander inescapable. She is pushing her media contacts to dredge up all of Shane’s old interviews and game footage from over the years and play them on endless fucking loop.
Remember when Shane Hollander was 11? 12? 13, 14, 15, 16? Remember the first time you saw him on tv? Remember when you cheered for him? Remember when you all fell in love with the idea of him? Remember how much you love him, remember how much you love him, remember how much you love him.
I think they actually decide to give the public new content of Shane as a child. They’ve been refusing to release Shane’s baby pictures and childhood home videos for years. They were trying to give him some part of his life that was still private. But right now they need the public to feel like their communal little boy is about to be left for dead in Russia if the government doesn’t intervene.
Shane when he was so small he couldn’t even crawl yet. Shane skating for the first time. Little baby Shane Hollander just won the Stanley Cup on a frozen lake.
Remember how much you love him, remember how much you love him, remember how much you love him.
They do interviews. They tearfully ask the government to bring their son home safely. They lay it on thick.
I don’t know enough about what David does at the Treasury board to say if he has any useful contacts right now, but if he does, then he’s called every single one of them. He is leveraging every single ounce of influence that he has.
They are terrified out of their minds during this. Because they know their son. They know better than anyone just how hard he can commit to something. If he says he is not leaving Russia without Ilya Rozanov, then he is not leaving Russia without Ilya Rozanov.
They recognize that the government may very well leave him behind if he pushes it too hard. They are doing everything they can to make that impossible.
Fundamentally, they want their son home. And they clocked the game Shane was playing in a second. He’s leveraging the public’s love for him to try to get Ilya home with him. So they are making sure the public loves him more than ever. They’re getting their son back, hell or high water.
And by the time they do then maybe they’ll have figured out how the fuck to handle that voicemail he left them. Because right now, they don’t know. It’s eating them alive.
4 years have passed. it's 2018. metros and raiders semi-final(it needs to be a semi-final due to conference stuff right) ilya is out of commission for the game, so everyone thinks due to the gay blessing metros have sealed the win. somehow it's still a brutal game despite rozanov not being there to match hollander.
raiders win. everyone thinks oh god the gay blessing it has failed
joseph bainbridge, the bisexual boston rookie has finally navigated the throes of his desire for shane hollander and pulls his new boyfriend to ice.
every raider cheers cus that was their plan to win over metros. the coming out gay blessing is stronger than the normal one. they calculated their chances and won.
I am fucking wheezing at the lore minor oc Joseph Bainbridge is amassing
will the reader ever know what Ilya told Irina while Shane was standing there next to him? Or will we be in the dark if it's from Shane's perspective? (Me just hoping Ilya takes the time to introduce Irina to Shane even though it's not "real" yet - because they'll never have a chance when it is.)
I think Ilya tells Shane eventually, when they figure everything out. I think the reader needs to be in the dark until Shane knows. But I think Ilya tells him once he knows that this is real for both of them.
This fic is a very different plotting experience for me because normally I only tell people about my plans after I figure everything out, and the Figuring It Out process usually involves me chewing on multiple storylines until I find the one I like the best and then I go back to the beginning of the story and revise it to make it flesh better with the later bits that I have now figured out. So everything is subject to change because I’m still in the Figuring It Out stage.
I think Ilya said goodbye to his mom. He wouldn’t be able to come back and see her again, but he would probably see her soon anyway, so it didn’t matter much. He would carry her out of Russia with him if he could.
He introduces her to Shane. He tells her that he is a crazy, idiot boy who did something really, really stupid to try to help Ilya. He tells her that Ilya likes him, really likes him, in the way that she always told him he’d like someone one day, and that it terrifies him.
So he’s going to do something stupid back. He’s going to go back with Shane even though it’s probably going to end very badly for him. It’ll get Shane safe. And even if it goes badly, it will just bring him home to her faster.
He thinks she’d like Shane a lot. Sometimes he thinks she already likes Shane.
Sometimes he thinks she sent Shane to him.
He’s afraid. He’ll try not to be. He loves her. Goodbye.
Hi I just binge read the Sochi Outing AU and since you said the cups go the same way in canon I can’t help picturing two very specific things;
The Big Gay Hockey Kiss happens three years early but with Hollanov (and, y’know, without the shock value because 99% of the human population already knows about those gay hockey guys)
AND Shane getting his historic non-goalie goalie goal that you wrote in Snapping Birch in 2015 except in this universe there was a private box with like. Will & Kate and future president Sanders
I am absolutely fucking dying at the mental image of Shane’s non-goalie goal happening in the Sochi outing au where everyone already knows about Hollanov. Like. There are so many different layers of humor to it.
Instead of people looking at Ilya staring at Shane in the aftermath like “look at the hate in his eyes” the unanimous opinion would be “oh he’s gonna fuck that man. he is putting him clean through the goddamn mattress tonight. oh my god.” There would be public outcry from metros fans who were worried that Ilya Rozanov was about to take out their beloved captain with his dick. whore climb OFF of him he still needs to win the Stanley cup 
And like. You don’t just get to dip from the stadium post-game. They’d have to do post-game interviews. They would have to meet with the future heads of state who came specifically to see their game. Shane and Ilya would be fighting for their goddamn lives.
Shane has just done the hottest thing to ever happen on NHL ice. Medically, Ilya cannot be normal about this. His pupils are the size of dimes. He is trembling like a drowned rat. He is in that post game interview like “yes yes I did not score the game winning goal. I will practice scoring very hard so it is different next year. I will start right now if we can fucking wrap this up—”
Shane is marshaling every ounce of willpower in his body and it is still not enough. He is waging the internal war of a man who knows he’s about to be railed within an inch of his goddamn life but needs to not be visibly hard while shaking a princess’s hand and he is fucking losing it. He has no goddamn clue how he and Ilya are going to hold it together long enough to get home without crashing the fucking car. Hayden has already told him that he is killing himself if they try to make him drive them. J.J. put his life on the line to get them out of Russia which means they can never ask him to do anything else ever again, especially if it’s this. They can’t ask a Raider because Shane has already seen them fist bump Ilya 37 times since the goal and if he sees even one more he’s murder-suiciding this shit.
Shane and Ilya are fucking white knuckling their way through an invitation to meet the literal Queen and at every possible opportunity Ilya is pulling Shane into a corner like “I think we left the stove on. And also all of the sinks, all of them. And I clogged the drains before leaving as part of a new pre game superstition that I never mentioned before now. House is flooding and on fire. It is an emergency we have to leave right now I am so serious—”
Also i think the Skip kiss is even funnier in this universe. Because just imagine you’re a homophobic hockey fan in this universe. Hockey players in gay love have been inescapable since goddamn 2014. A Hollanov kiss has happened in front of every single Stanley cup for three years running. When they both were finally knocked out of the playoffs, those assholes would be fucking cheering at finally getting a Stanley cup finals without that gay shit happening where they have to see it.
And then Scott Hunter pulls Kip Grady onto center ice.
In the Sochi outing AU, who do you think is coaching Shane as soon as the leak drops?
Do you think Shane would know that he needs to find Ilya immediately and pretend to be desperately in love? Does someone push him in the right direction amidst his panic? Or is the Romeo and Juliet strategy a result of his initial instinct to get Ilya and go to an embassy?
In my mind, Svetlana is the one who pushes Shane in the direction of using his influence to get Ilya out of the country. But the Romeo and Juliet strategy wasn’t exactly planned. Shane and Ilya both have moments in the immediate aftermath that leads the world to conclude that they are ass over tea kettle in love with each other, and Shane decides that narrative gives Ilya his best chance, so he starts pushing it.
The initial instinct to get to Ilya is Shane’s own. He doesn’t know just how bad this is going to be for him, but he knows enough to be afraid.
In my mind, they get outed while Shane is on the ice competing. It’s not the final match. Shane’s off competing against fucking Finland or something. Canada wins, and it’s in the press conference after that he gets confronted with reporters asking him if he has a comment on the reports of him in an intimate encounter with Russian captain Ilya Rozanov.
Critically, Shane does not know what encounter they’re talking about. He’s panicked. He doesn’t think of Vegas immediately. They’d been so careful, and the last time they were together intimately was in Shane’s own building. The last time they were physically together Ilya told him that they weren’t anything. Could someone have planted a camera in one of their hotel rooms? Did fucking Scott Hunter blab?
It’s very chaotic. The organizers are frantically shutting the press conference the fuck down. His delegation is trying to shuffle him off somewhere private. There’s someone in his ear reassuring him that he’s going to be absolutely safe but they need to discuss how to handle this.
And that snaps Shane out of it. He’ll be safe. What about Ilya?
He keeps asking what about Ilya, and they keep telling him to not worry about that right now, and he just.
He can’t. He can’t leave without him.
He’s sorry. He just. He has to find him.
Shane runs.
He bolts from his own delegation. He’s not really thinking in this moment. Of how it looks or of what people may think of the decision later. He saw Ilya before the match, watching from a quiet place near the rafters like he had during the men’s figure skating finals. So he dodges everyone, the press and the crowd and the Canadian delegation trying to corral him, and he just fucking runs like he’s trying to qualify as a sprinter in the Summer Olympics.
This is one of the moments that escalates the entire scandal. Shane Hollander leaving behind the safety of his own delegation in a desperate attempt to find Ilya Rozanov becomes etched into the public consciousness. It’s a culturally defining moment, like the V-E Day New York Times Square Kiss only better because it wasn’t actually just some rando forcing a non-consensual kiss on a lady trying to go about her fucking day.
This moment is brought up constantly in the aftermath. It’s one of the reasons why Shane and Ilya are worth so much political capital. The image of Shane Hollander simply fucking running to find Ilya becomes a symbol for pure, unequivocal love.
Again, it is against Shane’s best interests to leave the safety of his own delegation. And he knows that. They just told him that. But he doesn’t think. He moves in a panic, dodges the press and his own people, and goes to find Ilya.
And that moment haunts both Shane and Ilya later, because neither of them know why the fuck Shane did that. The entire world is touting it around as this show of honest, sincere, sun-moon-and-stars, soulmate love. And maybe it was. But they don’t know. They didn’t have the time to figure it out together, and now it feels like it’s too late.
The question of whether it was torments Shane and Ilya because it feels like the answer resolves so much of their complicated feelings around what happened, but in opposite ways.
Later, Ilya wants it to have been an act of love, because he’s obsessed with him, Shane Hollander, obsessed with his freckles and how he’s secretly funny and the way he folds his clothes before sex. He’s completely and utterly sick over him, and it’s not fair, because he feels like he trapped Shane in this relationship. He kissed him in Vegas even though it was a bad fucking idea, because he was young and stupid and so fucking afraid of going back to Russia, and because he just wanted to kiss his pretty crush on the balcony the way anyone else could. He knew it was a bad idea and he did it anyway, and it fucked him, and Shane bailed him out even though he could have left Ilya to his own devices and told the world that Ilya had forced the entire kiss on him. He pushed him off at the end, look. That means he didn’t want it. That means it meant nothing to him. Ilya meant nothing to him. Don’t pay attention to how long he was kissing back.
If Shane ran because he loved him instead of because of him just being a good person who wanted to save someone, then maybe this is okay. Maybe Ilya didn’t trap him because Shane loved him already. Maybe he can feel less guilty.
On the flip side, Shane’s doesn’t want to have ran because he loved Ilya. Because maybe the entire stupid plan he rushed them both into after wasn’t actually because he thought it was a good plan. Maybe he did it because he was a lovesick idiot who saw an opportunity to trap the guy who’d told him less 24 hours prior that he didn’t feel the same way. Maybe he could have come up with something else and convinced everyone that the stupid kiss was just some dumb fucking hazing ritual. Shane’s suffered through enough hazing in his time to know that there’s plenty of people in the League who’d make you shove your tongue down your rival’s throat as a fucked up hazing ritual. Maybe he had other options, ones he didn’t explore because he immediately jumped to the thing he secretly wanted all along.
And if that’s true then maybe he’s just some fucking asshole who trapped the guy he likes in a relationship he doesn’t want and can’t escape.
Shane manages to get into a back stairwell and up to where he saw Ilya watching alone.
Ilya isn’t there.
Svetlana is.
She drags him into storage closet and tells him that she doesn’t think it’s bugged. She checked.
She’s a friend of Ilya’s.
Ilya ran already. She was hoping that maybe Shane had seen him up here and would come looking for him. She’s glad she was right.
Shane doesn’t know if he should believe her. He doesn’t fucking know her. And he doesn’t know what the fuck is going on or what the stakes even are or if he just fucked everything up by running first and asking questions later. Shane is Stressed.
Svetlana insists that she’s Ilya’s friend. And Shane is Ilyusha’s Jane, isn’t he? The one Ilya is always texting.
She can always tell when it’s him. There’s a way Ilya smiles when Jane texts. He only ever uses it for Jane.
He smiled that same way when he saw Shane on TV once. That’s how she knew.
Shane has no idea what to do with that information.
He doesn’t have time to unpack it. And also it could still be a lie or a trap. The Russian government could tap their phones and find out about their texts, which is. Wow. He’s discovering a new fear called “Did Putin read my sexts?”
Svetlana doesn’t have time to convince him. If he wants to help save Ilya, he’s taking a leap of fucking faith.
And fuck. Fuck. Shane wants that.
How bad is this? He doesn’t even know what happens, what, what the punishment is, what could happen to him. Could he go to jail for this?
Svetlana says the law just sets a fine.
Shane doesn’t get it. Why would Ilya be running if it’s just a fine? Is, is it his family, or—
No. Yes, but no. It’s not that.
The government is very angry with him right now.
Don’t ask her how she knows. Don’t. And don’t repeat what she’s about to say, not to anyone.
They just endorsed Ilya to the entire nation. Putin just endorsed him to the entire nation. Right after they condemned the gay community to the entire world. Him being queer, it’s a betrayal. He just humiliated them in a way they’re not about to forgive or forget. They are going to try to stop him from leaving the country alive. Ilya ran, but Svetlana doesn’t think he has enough time.
Russia will not just let Ilya leave after this. Not with the way he just embarrassed them. But the eyes of the world are watching. And maybe that could force their hand.
Shane is important to his country, isn’t he?
He’s a good player. And she’s seen him on the news. Sometimes she thinks they talk about him the way Russia talks about Ilya.
Maybe they’d save Ilya if he asked them to. It’s the only idea she has.
And Shane. Has no fucking clue if she’s right about that. But he’s like. Okay. Okay. How, how does he do that if Ilya’s already gone?
Svetlana gives him a jacket and a hat to hide his face. She tells him how to get out of the stadium without being caught by the cameras. She gives him car keys and tells him the train station Ilya’s headed for. He has to go fast if he wants to stop Ilya before he gets on a train.
She can’t go with him. She can’t be seen with Ilya anymore. Her father’s in trouble enough for their association. But she asks Shane to tell Ilya that she loves him. And that one day they’ll be together again. She’ll find a way.
Shane now has no idea if he’s the shameful side piece and this is the person Ilya’s actually in love with.
But he doesn’t have time. He puts on the jacket and the hat. He goes to leave.
Svetlana stops him. Shes struggling with something.
Ilya’s a very good liar, she tells him. He had to be. But she’s known him for a long time. And her gut is telling her he didn’t actually go to the train station.
She sends Shane to a cemetery instead.
It’s a gamble. If she’s wrong, Ilya will be in the wind, and Shane may get fucking jumped and murdered while he’s out looking for Ilya. If she’s wrong, she’s fucked Ilya and his boy.
But she doesn’t think she’s wrong. And she wasn’t. Ilya didn’t run.
He went to be with his mama.
Yes I know his mother was most likely not buried anywhere near Sochi but I want the drama so we are saying that she was buried in the city.
Ilya’s was pretty positive he’s about as fucked as you can be. He found out too late what had happened. He didn’t have much of a headstart. There are already memes flooding the internet about Putin sucking him off which. Could not possibly do more than it was already doing to shorten his lifespan to a period of hours. Sveta had gotten the tip off from people in her dad’s office that the government was fucking nuclear levels of pissed at him. Evidence would probably be planted soon that would frame him for a crime that they could incarcerate him for, if he wasn’t killed before then. They’d have an excuse to put a travel ban on his passport before he ever reached the border. It was just a matter of how long it took them to catch up to him.
He’d have more of a chance at running if he wasn’t so fucking recognizable, but the government had just spent the months leading up to the games putting him on every nationalist propaganda campaign imaginable. Everyone knew his face. He’d never make it.
So he figured if he was probably going out anyway, he might as well see his mama one last time.
He figured his brother would find him there. Or his father. Maybe they’d come or maybe they’d just send the police. He guesses he’ll see how far that ol’ familial love will take him when whoever’s coming arrives.
He was expecting someone to find him at his mother’s grave.
He just wasn’t expecting Shane.
And Ilya is immediately like. You Cannot Fucking Be Here.
His one comfort when he was taking off was that Shane would be fully protected by his delegation and also that Shane probably fucking hates him after their last conversation so maybe never seeing Ilya again won’t hurt him too badly. Shane’s not fucking protected if he flees alone into Russia. Is he fucking stupid?
And Shane’s like. Probably. But he’s not here for himself. He’s here for Ilya.
They have a very tense conversation. Ilya wants him to get the fuck back to his people and never leave their sight again. He wants Shane to get the fuck away from him and be safe.
Shane wants Ilya to go with him.
Ilya doesn’t think it’s a good plan. He thinks that it’s just going to make Shane’s position more precarious. And he doesn’t think fucking Canada’s going to intervene on his behalf. He’s not a Canadian citizen. He doesn’t even play for a Canadian team. They have absolutely no reason to help him.
But Shane won’t budge. And Ilya just wants him to go back to where he’s safe. He’s fucked either way. He might as well make sure Shane Hollander isn’t fucked with him.
Ilya finally relents. He walks back to his mama’s grave, and he tells Shane to just. Just stand next to him and not say anything. He just needs to say something and then they can go.
Shane doesn’t know what he tells his mom. It’s all in Russian. But at the end of it, Ilya stands and leaves with him.
Okay. Okay. Shane knows they need to go to the Canadian embassy.
A problem: he has no fucking clue where that thing is.
He doesn’t have a phone or a gps or a fucking map. He doesn’t even know if there is a Canadian embassy in Sochi. He can’t ask for directions because whoever they ask may recognize one of them and hate crime them. Svetlana had to give him directions to get this far.
And Ilya is like. Oh my god. Stellar planning. And Shane is like. Shut the fuck up.
They go back to the Olympic Village. Shane’s phone is there, in his dorm room where he left it before competing. He can contact his country’s Olympic organizers from there, and then just… figure out what the fuck is next.
The way back is one of the most terrifying trips of their lives.
They keep waiting to be recognized and stopped. Their heart rates are through the goddamn roof the whole way. But somehow, they make it. Shane power walks Ilya straight to his dorm room and shut the door behind them.
An extremely distressed J.J. is waiting in there.
And he’s like, “Oh thank G—”
Ilya raises a finger to his lips to shut him up. Then they check for bugs.
There’s one in the light fixture. Another in the socket. They think that’s everything. But it’s not great. They definitely know that Shane and Ilya are here now. If they didn’t figure it out when J.J. reacted, they figured it out when their bugs went dead.
Shane grabs his phone and calls their officials. His hand is shaking.
And j.j. is like. Dude. What? The fuck???
And Shane’s like. I know. I know—
And J.J.’s like. No. No, you don’t know. No one knew where Shane went. He’s been sitting here fucking terrified that Shane was fucking dead. Does Shane have any idea just how much he scared everyone when he took off like that?
And that’s. That’s the thing. There is an ongoing international crisis right now around where Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov are. Like the second Shane Hollander fucking took off, emergency briefing hit the desk of every single world leader with a delegation at the Olympics.
Russia was a very controversial host country for the 2014 Olympics. There was a lot of concern in the media leading up to the event about whether athletes—especially queer athletes—would be safe in Russia. But Russia was allowed to host anyway, and countries chose to send their athletes to compete despite the public concern.
Ilya has less protections because he is a Russian citizen. Like it’s a scandal if something happens to him, but countries tend to primarily intervene for the safety of their own citizens. Russia has more freedom to pull shit against Ilya because he is their citizen. Shane is a different story.
If anything happens to Shane Hollander on Russian soil, then it is going to be one of the biggest scandals in the history of the Olympics. There is going to be a reckoning. People are going to blame Russia’s anti-LGBTQ+ policies. They are going to blame the Olympic organizers for allowing it to be in Russia. They are going to blame every single country that sent a delegation over the public’s concern. This is potentially a worst case scenario.
At this point, there is global news coverage about the search for Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov. The footage of Shane Hollander fleeing his own delegation has been broadcast to almost every country on the planet. The entire nation of Canada is holding its breath. That country watched Shane Hollander grow up. He has been on their TV screens and in their newspapers since he was 12 years old. He is the nation’s beloved son and he is missing.
Russia has already received a very tense phone call about from Canadian officials about just what’s going to happen if Shane Hollander is harmed within their borders. The prime minister is in an emergency meeting. The president of the United States is in an emergency meeting. The Russian government is in every kind of emergency meeting it can possibly have. The Olympics organizers are scrambling.
The Canadian delegation answers shane’s phone call on the first ring. They want to know where the fuck he is. Shane says he’s in his room at the Olympic village. He needs to get somewhere safer. The, the embassy or whatever.
Uh, yeah, he fucking does.
There’s not an embassy in Sochi, but they have an outpost there for the Olympics. Shane is not going to move a goddamn inch. A convoy is en route. It will be there in eight minutes. He is going to wait for their call. He is not leaving the room until they come for him. And he is not fucking running from them when they arrive to collect him.
Eight minutes. Do not go anywhere.
Shane hangs up. Ilya notes that Shane didn’t say anything about him.
And yeah. Shane didn’t. Because he’s not giving them an option. Ilya’s just… getting in the car too and they can all deal with what that means after.
This is a bad plan.
Ilya has absolutely zero confidence in the fact that Canada’s helping him too. He frankly only went along with Shane’s crazy fucking plan because he thought it was the only way to get Shane safe. He thought it’d do jack shit for him.
He was already fucked, but Shane needed to get back to his own delegation, and he wasn’t budging unless Ilya came too. So Ilya came too. But he has no illusions about Canada letting him in that car.
He is not their citizen. And it doesn’t matter how good Shane is at hockey. Canada is not starting an international incident just because Shane Hollander asks nicely.
There is a heavy beat.
And J.J. is like. Honestly they may.
Shane’s like. Sort of a big deal in Canada. Has been for like. a decade. J.J. remembers watching Shane on the news when Shane was like 12. Everyone’s a Shane Hollander fan in Canada. The prime minister is a Shane Hollander fan. Whether the candidates were Shane Hollander fans was an actual point of contention in the last election. J.J. has quite literally never met a Canadian who doesn’t know who Shane Hollander is. And they made him an answer on the naturalization test last year, so they actually won’t let you be Canadian unless you know who he is.
J.J., hands folded in front of his face: Montreal is probably already on fire
Shane, with profound consternation: I know.
J.J.: Hayden texted. The SPVM called him asking him to do a press conference to try to keep the public calm. Man they do not care what he says
Shane, with even more profound consternation: I know.
Ilya: what are you talking about?
J.J., still low key thinks this man forced a kiss on J.J.’s fucking boy and that Shane only took off to help him because he’s Just That Nice A Person, bringing an Aggressive Energy to this conversation: you’ve been to Montreal. What, do you never go outside when you’re there?
Ilya, always ready to Be The Bigger Bitch: hmm, no. I am always so busy doing other things
Shane, the Other Things he’s doing: guys
J.J.: *stands up like he’s going to fight a bitch* you are such a fucking asshole
Shane: lay off of him
J.J.: he doesn’t know the first thing about you—
Shane,: I’m basically anonymous in Boston anyway he has no reason to know—
Ilya, bewildered: you are one of the most hated men in Boston
J.J., talking over both of them: he dragged you into this, he put you in danger, he forced his tongue down your fucking throat and he doesn’t even care enough to know the first thing about you—
Shane, also talking over him : he didn’t—it’s not like I knew he was Putin’s favorite hockey player when I blew him—
And Shane. Regrets. Sharing that detail.
And J.J., who was still very much operating under the assumption that Ilya just forced a kiss on Shane, because that’s kind of what the video looked like, is like. Wait. Is this like. An actual thing??
And Shane is like. Isn’t the source of all of my current life problems the fact that everyone knows this is an actual thing???
J.J. doesn’t have time to respond. An ally bursts into the room.
Carter Vaughn is so fucking relieved that Shane and Ilya are alive.
When shit hit the fan, Carter grabbed Scott and tried to get into contact with the U.S. delegation to figure out if there was anything they could do to help get Shane and Ilya out of here in one piece. They were told in no uncertain terms to stay in their goddamn rooms and keep their fucking mouths shut.
But Carter Vaughn does not do that. He is a goddamn ally. So he eventually decides to haul ass over to J.J.’s room with Scott, because if anyone knows where Shane is, it’s J.J.
And Scott, who had tornado warning sirens going off in his head, just sort of went with this.
This is a mistake for Scott. The second Carter stops hugging Shane in relief, Shane tries to throw fucking hands with him.
Everyone else feels this is a very strong energy to bring to the room.
Shane doesn’t care. He swears to fucking God, if Scott said shit about them to anyone and they got outed in goddamn Russia, Shane is going to actually fucking kill him—
And Ilya is like. What the fuck are you talking about, how would the fucking old man even know—
Shane: 2011 all stars
Scott, miserably: yeah it was the 2011 all stars
Ilya: what
Scott: you gave him your room number right in front of me
J.J.: *taking his own pulse*
Scott, haunted: and the walls in that hotel were so thin
Carter: whoa wait you already knew??
Shane, still fucking angry: what he didn’t go back and tell the whole fucking locker room after he threw it in my face on the ice???
Carter: you did WHAT
Scott: yeah look man I’ve been wanting to apologize for that—
Ilya does not have time for all this.
Does Shane not fucking know how they got outed?
Shane. Has had a lot of things happen really quickly. He knows enough.
Obviously he does not. It was Vegas. Stupid fucking balcony kiss in Vegas during their rookie year. There was a fucking surveillance camera that they got caught on.
It takes Shane a second to remember what exactly happened. And then he’s like. Oh Jesus Christ. It must look like I went for a handshake and you went for fucking second base.
And Ilya’s like. Yes. It looks exactly like that. Which means it’s perfect.
Shane will tell everyone that he isn’t gay. He didn’t want the kiss. He was just trying to shake hands like a good sportsman, and Ilya is just some asshole pervert who forced his tongue down Shane’s throat. He pushed Ilya off in the end and stormed off, so people will believe him.
Shane can explain everything else away. He went to get Ilya because he is such a nice guy who is on a year-round campaign for the Lady Byng sportsmanship award. He will help anyone, even asshole perverts. As long as Shane goes back and talk about how disgusting Ilya is and how violated he made him feel, everyone will just blame Ilya—
And Shane is like. Would you shut the fuck up? We are not doing that. Jesus.
The phone rings. The car is about to arrive for Shane. Shane needs to wait in the room. People will come to escort him from the room to the car.
They are also not doing that. Shane says he’s meeting them at the street outside and hangs up on them.
He wants them to have the least amount of time possible to refuse to take Ilya too. He is jumping them with the news that there’s a second passenger when the car is immediately in front of them and then they are just assertively putting Ilya in the back seat and hoping they drive away with him too. It’s his best plan.
And Ilya is like. Hollander. They are not letting me in that car.
It is his best plan. Fucking move, Rozanov.
Carter, J.J., and Scott don’t let them go alone. They flank them like secret service agents escorting the goddamn president. And they are moving fast. They are trying to get them en route to the Canadian diplomatic outpost before the fucking Russian police shows up to disappear Ilya or before a hacked off homophobic Olympian tries to hate crime them.
And like. They walk out through the fucking main entrance. It is a public street. The media is out there already.
The Canadian convoy pulls up.
Yeah, they are not letting Ilya in the fucking car.
He is not a Canadian citizen. They have no authority over him or interest in him. Shane is the only one going to the Canadian outpost. Ilya Rozanov will be perfectly safe in the Olympic village, they’re sure.
And Shane’s like. Okay. Then he’s not getting in the car either.
If Ilya’s going to be safe in the Olympic village, then so is Shane. He guesses they’ll all find out, because Shane is not leaving his fucking side. The only way Shane is getting in that car is if Ilya’s in it too.
And Ilya is like. You are being fucking crazy. Get in the goddamn car.
Ilya is stressed. He wants Shane to get out of this safely more than anything else in the goddamn world, and that was the one thing that seemed to be assured. Canada would protect him. He would be fine.
Except Shane’s not letting Canada protect him. And Ilya is fucking terrified as to what happens if that car drives away without Shane Hollander in it.
Shane won’t budge. Whatever happens is happening to both of them. He’s not getting in the car without him. He’s not leaving this country without him.
J.J. tacks on that he is not leaving this country without Shane Hollander. So now there’s two Canadian Olympians who are about to end up in Russian detention. Let them both in the goddamn car.
There is a minute where this is just a fucking standoff. J.J., Carter, and Scott are arguing with the Canadian officials. But Ilya is arguing with Shane.
You have to be dramatic about it. You have to be cinematic about it. You need politicians to see this moment and already be imagining the blockbuster Hollywood movie that will sway voters for years to come.
Ilya takes Shane’s face between his hands and begs him to get in the fucking car.
He tried. He tried. Whatever happens next, it’s okay, does he understand? Shane, please, please, just get in the car now. It’s not like the police are going to just arrest Shane with Ilya just because Shane asks.
Uh. They will if Shane punches a fucking cop.
Shane is a fucking crazy person and Ilya is going to force him into that goddamn car.
Shane’s digging in his heels. He’s been trying to figure out how to get Ilya out of this fucking country since he talked to Svetlana. He doesn’t think the Canadian government is going to save Ilya from fucking Putin just because Shane asks.
But maybe they’d save Shane.
Shane needs to chain his own safety to Ilya’s and this is the only way he can think of. He’ll put the gun to his own head. That’s the only way out of this that he can think of. He needs to make sure that he only gets out of this if Ilya does. And… and maybe that means that neither of them get out of this.
Shane’s not leaving him. Whatever happens, happens.
You have to add external pressure to it to finally get Ilya in the car. Have other cars pulling up, and no one knows if they’re more press or the fucking Russian police.
J.J. gets right in the official’s face and tells him that the entire fucking world is watching what he does right now. If something happens, it is on his head.
Now let both of them in the fucking car.
And in the moment, the official breaks. Fine. Both of them come.
Shane physically puts Ilya in that fucking car. J.J. is a step behind him, physically putting Shane in the car. He squeezes Shane’s shoulder just once before the door closes and the car screeches away.
It takes five minutes for Shane to realize he’s still holding Ilya’s hand. And he can’t bring himself to let go.
And I think that’s the start of the love story. They both act like they’re in love where the world can see it, and so the world thinks they are. The narrative starts because of what they do in the heat of the moment, and then after they realize, Shane specifically decides to double the fuck down and Ilya follows his lead.
In my mind, there’s a moment later where the Canadian delegation gives Shane an opening to start walking this the fuck back. They show him the surveillance footage from Vegas that was the source of the leak. Shane pushes Ilya off of him in it. He walks away. He looks upset. That doesn’t look like Shane wanted that kiss to happen.
And Shane’s like. No. No, he—he just freaked out because they were in public. But they were together. Are together. They have been for years. Since before they were rookies.
Ilya nods. He agrees. But Shane is the one to start it, because that’s going to be the source of so much of his guilt later.
Shane was the one who ran where everyone could see him, and Shane was the one who committed them to the love story narrative to the fucking Canadian government. He couldn’t ask Ilya for permission first. They never get a chance to talk about it in private. And so Shane is going to feel like he trapped him in this because of it.
Please have a moment of silence for the people who were killed instead of freed when news of emancipation finally reached the furthest corners of the american south.
have another moment for the ledgers, catalogs, and records that were burned and the homes that were destroyed to hide the presence of very much alive and still enslaved people on dozens of plantations and homesteads across the south for decades after emancipation.
and have a third moment for those who were hunted and killed while fleeing the south to find safety across the border, overseas, in the north and to the west.
black people. light a candle, write a note to those who have passed telling them what you have achieved in spite of the racist and intolerant conditions of this world, feel the warmth of the flame under your hand, say a prayer of rememberance if you are religious, place the note under the candle, and then blow it out.
if you have children, sit them down and tell them anything you know about the life of oldest black person you've ever met. it doesn't have to be your own family. tell them what you know about what life was like for us in the days, years, decades after emancipation. if you don't know much, look it up and learn about it together.
This is Juneteenth.
white people CAN interact with this post. share it, spread it.
(Of course, Shane is not choosing Sweden. Shane is choosing to Fade Away. Look at him he is Fading :) wait no stop looking!)
(But Montreal is scared and angry because what if he DOES choose Sweden? What if he leaves them? What if the hockey prince of Canada abdicates his throne? For fucking Sweden?? Unacceptable)
(The Choose Sweden billboards get vandalised by so many Montreal citizens. There are hunting parties that drive around to find the billboards and vandalise them so they cannot tempt Hockey Jesus away from them. Some of the billboards get burnt to a husk. It becomes a whole legal thing. The government has to get involved. Please stop burning down Sweden’s billboards, we are working on it, please don’t start a war)
(Montreal, holding a lit Molotov aimed at Sweden: GET YOUR SLUT HANDS OFF OUR HOCKEY BOY)
While in reality:
Shane has no idea this is happening. He is simply Too Offline
Shane is trying so hard to goddamn Fade already and yet he persists in the hearts and minds of men. Thank you so much for these I love them so much
CHICAGO MENTION!!! …HONESTLY KIND OF A BUMMER CHICAGO MENTION BUT I’LL TAKE IT! Really what is more the Chicago Experience than seeing an underwhelming cubs game and having a bad time at Navy Pier before committing egregious traffic violations? Love this city <3
Fun fact about driving back west, if they go through Kansas there’s a point just after Kansas City where you stop being in the vaguely hilly Midwest that makes up Iowa & Missouri and the ground just sort of falls away and the sky gets really big. Which sounds beautiful and poetic but can and will just give you vertigo if you’re not ready for it. Also there’s too many gas stations to really feel the majesty of it all. Great crashout angst material especially if you have to pull over at one of the gas stations to cry out the adrenaline from the Holy Shit The Sky Just Got Big vertigo. And then you get hit with a fuck off massive thunderstorm. And are stuck at your panic attack gas station until it passes.
Another fun fact about driving through Kansas is even at its flattest it’s juuuust hilly enough to make the “how far away is that cow, actually” game interesting bc the hills make judging distance and size surprisingly fucking hard. The *actual* winner of the flattest, worst state to drive through is Nebraska. (And eastern Colorado which is not not west Nebraska.) Do with that what you will.
This is the exact kind of regional knowledge I love to get
