it seemed funny at the time

keepin it gay in Oceanside, CA

[themoontookourvibe]

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

people make a lot of touch-starved gay jokes about Lush but the truth is it’s not a gay experience, it’s a human experience. no one is safe, no one is immune.

you walk in there for the first time thinkin’ I’m gonna buy some hand soap today and then some dude who smells like something impossible, like he’s being described by a YA author, he smells like lavender, leather, and the steam coming from hot pavement after a short summer rain,

That guy. He comes up to you and he asks if he can help you sample something. He leads you to a small, metal basin of water. It’s so pastoral, it’s so quaint. You can imagine it sitting beside your bed with a porcelain pitcher in your farm cottage for you to use to wash your face in the morning.

He rolls up your sleeve a bit, and you awkwardly apologize for not doing it yourself, and he says it’s fine.

Sir LeatherRain gently rinses your hand in the warm water, and then he dries it off attentively. Then he massages some of the product into your palm. It’s the cinnamon bean massage bar. He says “don’t you love how it feels warm as you rub it in?”

He’s making more direct eye contact with you than you’ve ever made in your entire life.

As he finishes, a woman who smells like coffee beans and pink-skied winter sunrises approaches and says “oh I LOVE that product.”

You know it’s about the sell. It’s transactional, but you’re in love. You can’t help it.

You’re also More uncomfortable than you’ve ever been in your entire life.

As you walk away to the register, you clench your hand and unclench it like Mr. Darcy when he touches Elizabeth Bennet’s hand to help her out of a coach.

[tackywizard]

As someone who’s worked at Lush I assure you it’s just as weirdly intimate to be the one rubbing lotions into other people’s skin

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

oh thank god

[hogwartsaheadcanon]

Lush has some bizarro magic going on i once wore a hat i’d knitted into a lush shop and one of the staff members casually complimented it and i went home and i got half way through knitting them one to take into the shop as a gift before i realised how fucking whacked out a thing that would be to do like i was ensorcelled there was spell work upon me

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

obsessed with this

[thelaughingvulture]

I’ve been in Lush exactly ONCE many moons ago and I’m still convinced it is run entirely by powerful witches.

[moderatelyhumorous]

The first time in a Lush I spent like $80

[trashyinpastel]

Mamma Mia is Greek mythology

[everythingstarstuff]

[clubdreamm-deactivated20210114]

[justcatposts]

Cat learns how magnets work 

(via)

[frozen-felix]

[valtsv]

HOT WOMEN IN YOUR AREA WANT TO EXPLORE ANCIENT RUINS WITH YOU

[m-a-n-d-u-s-a]

[nikoni]

[ihateiu]

[semiotextiana]

i think its sexy when men have like 3 followers. anything above 100 is a female trait. ideal is when theyre offline fighting in the woods

[whitepeopletwitter]

[mens-rights-activia]

[i-am-corbin-dallas]

[glitterpen1s-deactivated2013012]

you know that feeling when you’re on your period and you take a shower and you feel so clean and relieved and nice but then as soon as you turn the water off it’s a race against you, gravity and time

[cant-adult-will-fandom-for-free]

I swear the last line made it feel like the plotline of an action film

[nathaniels-otps-deactivated2017]

It is a period drama

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[chemicalkin]

I’m not over this review of a self groomer for a three legged cat. Look at him. He hasn’t been able scratch his left side by himself since he lost his leg but now he can and he is living life the fullest. That is the face of a cat who has finally scratched an itch.

[narutio]

[c-bassmeow]

IM FUCKING DYING ;OIHIHLBGLJMN LKLIO.J