captain of team fuck up

Jess. 23. Washington, DC. video game playing, anime watching marxist 60% video games. 20% anime. 20% history, russia, and far left politics. 100% more stupid shit that i think is funny.

[armorkingii-deactivated20190321]

what a time to be alive

[turings-deactivated20180627]

in an attempt to appeal to the pathos of my potential employers, i wrote my resume using the same format a no-kill shelter would use to describe a geriatric dog

[turings-deactivated20180627]

i am a gentle, mild-mannered young man looking for a forever job to spend the rest of my years in. though i may not be the most talented and versatile person on the job market, i’m the perfect employee for someone out there, and that someone just might be you(r company)!

[profeminist]

Source

[catsofinstagram]

[angremlin-deactivated20250312]

You know I’m not sure cats actually understand cats either

[thisisntmycat]

[sleepinggiantinn]

[catsbeaversandducks]

“I try to capture all the little fun moments that happen when living with cats. All my little cat comics are done on 4 by 4 post-it notes! My fluffy friends are always a great source of inspiration and entertainment. And best of all they are always there when you need a hug or a good cry.”

Comics/text by​ Rikke Asbjoern - More info: Instagram

[goodbyeeveryonee-deactivated202]

hating children isn’t edgy or progressive lmfao you look ugly as fuck and pitiful hating on little people who barely understand what hate means and i don’t want y'all near any children ever

[auujehjrgnmuuoingjoskjcnjsjshdo]

weird how tumblr is cracking down on copyright violations when their whole website is an updog violation

[kraftpunk]

the fuck? what’s updog?

[kraftpunk]

you know, after some consideration of whats happening in my life rn and how this all played out, i feel like i’ve been lied to. tricked and decieved.i just need a few moments to process this.

[sassking-trevor]

My friend with a weird yet harmless kink: I have this weird yet harmless kink

Me, a loving and supportive friend that doesn’t judge them for their weird yet harmless kink:

[blackamydunne1-deactivated20170]

someone actually trying to be reasonable on this trash dump of a website: being mentally ill is a huge hardship at times and often we have feelings we cannot control but you have to take responsibility for your actions if you hurt someone because of your illness because your feelings aren’t the only ones that are important as much as that might be hard to see at the time, especially if the other person is also mentally ill

absolute idiots on tumblr dot hell: so you think all mentally ill people are abusive and should die?

[girllookitthatbody-ahh]

I REALLY fucking hate the stereotype that Canadians are so nice and passive and apologetic about everything. The stereotype is more than just irksome to me; it’s damaging. It disregards the ugly realities of racism throughout the country, particularly towards Aboriginal people. 

I have witnessed way too much racism in this country to find the “nice Canadian” stereotype cute. The number of missing and murdered Aboriginal women and girls in my city alone is horrifying. The abuse and flat-out hatred is grotesque. 

Here in Canada, people are really good at not giving a shit about the well-being of another human being if that person happens to be Aboriginal. Here in Canada, people are so well-armed with their assumptions and stereotypes that they can’t even bother to see Aboriginal people as HUMAN. 

So no. Canada is not a magical land where everyone loves each other and says sorry constantly. That stereotype is insulting to every Aboriginal woman who is assaulted, goes missing, and/or is murdered. It’s insulting to the families of those missing and murdered women who seek justice and answers that they will never receive, simply because non-Aboriginal Canadians don’t give a damn.

[quietlycanadian]

Hey guys this is really important. Missing and murdered Indigenous Women and Girls is an actual problem, and it’s a huge problem here in Canada

[shubbabang]

happy 420 and day i reserve a spot in hell

[lesbianrey]

optimistic liberal reformist college freshman luke who believes the jedi order can be rebuilt once again if we all follow the light side this time

vs

radicalized anarcho-marxist retired professor luke who knows that reform won’t solve the problem that jedi ideology is fundamentally broken and will continue to repeat a cycle of boom and bust

[namrekeya-deactivated20161028]

me: I don’t like sharing anything about my personal life with strangers.

someone on the bus bumping into me: oh, sorry.

me: it’s okay, I’ve been hurt before. it all started at the onset of 2015 and

[danielkanhai]

i’m not against vaping, but man, vaping two inches from my face on the subway is a ridiculous asshole kind of move. this dude was billowing like he was auditioning for the role of haunted house fog machine. the humidity in the whole car changed, he was ruining haircuts. just jump starting the water cycle. condensation was dripping down my glasses. people were slipping off poles, it was chaos. it was like watching one man try to terraform the moon. a planet with one dense, root beer scented atmosphere blocking out the sun and choking all life. 

[jazzcochina-deactivated20180807]

i consider this a sort of prose poem to be honest

[sleepyspoonie]

“their tongues battled for dominance–”

-dm voice- “i’m going to need both tongues to roll initiative”