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ashawol-deactivated20240605

I don't know what to say. I'm feeling so... just god oh no oh no no no. This hurts. Perhaps it's irrational but I feel as though I've lost a friend. He was so beautiful and seemed like a genuinely good person and I have felt what he must've before and there's nothing I or anyone can do now and I just.... I don't know. This was such a shock and just... GOD not HIM. I would've liked to get to know him he really seemed like a good person and a gentle, kind soul. You did well. You really did and I wish you could've held on. I wish something or someone could have saved you. I wish you never had to deal with this in the first place. You deserved love and happiness and LIFE. I pray his soul is at peace. I just wish he could've found it here in life. I'm so, so sorry. Rest in peace Kim Jonghyun. You did so well and you will be missed.

#p #jonghyun #you did well #basically just a cleaned up version of my rambling tags...

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SHINee || Alarm Clock

#jonghyun #you did well #music

motherish

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since I’ve heard. I have so much that I want to say but my mind is blank. Jonghyun had such an impact on me growing up. I remember when they first debuted and you could hardly find any photos of them. Staying up late watching Hello Baby and being so upset that I couldn’t go to their very first concert. This blog even started off as a SHINee blog! One of the very few groups where I felt a connection. With Jonghyun. With all of them. I cannot imagine what his family and friends are feeling. I’m waiting on all of this to be a joke. SHINee was such a huge part of my teenage years and to know he’s gone, it feels like I’ve lost a friend. I’m angry. I’m sad. I’m in disbelief. Just looking at albums and seeing his face, it feels as if time has stood still. I don’t want to believe it.

Please, I urge you, if you feel yourself going down that same path, SPEAK UP. Say something! Please know you are not alone. That there are people that care about you and want to see you alive and well. Suicide is not the way. I feel myself going down that path sooooo many times. More times than I can count, but there is more out there for me. FOR YOU. Please, PLEASE be there to see it.

#jonghyun #you did well

motherish

I cannot believe this. I cannot believe this. I can. Not. Believe. This. It is 6am and I have been sobbing. This doesn’t even sound real. I grew up with shinee. They were the only group I still kept up with. Jonghyun dying sounds like a fuckin joke. To know that he was hurting so much that he felt death was the only way out? I have no words.

#:((#jonghyun #you did well