Cassie's Chronicles

Sercan. 32. Upstate NY and thriving. I'm bisexual, Spiritual, Introverted and keep to myself. I'm a former CMA, an aspiring novelist that makes tiktoks when she has the energy. I have many passions that include but are not limited to: medicine, animals, the ocean, farming, cooking, baking, writing, reading, tiktok, living. I have Gastroparesis and am currently being evaluated for a boat load more conditions. Finally getting the help I've needed for a very long time. Visit my about me if you'd like to know more!

[thepersonalquotes]

i love smart ppl who can teach me stuff without making me feel dumb for not knowing it

[honeyilovejoo]

[perrfectly]

[weltenwellen]

Sarah Fathima Mohammed, from "nocturnes in the rain"

[mmaryoliver]

[Text ID: For years i covered my ears while i spoke, afraid of what i might discover if i listened. /End ID.]

[grace--upon--grace]

[remanence-of-love]

[adioringly]

[dirtyatmosphere]

[b-ambu-deactivated20120915]

(via imgTumble)

[gloriouslyquality]

+

[remanence-of-love]

[anxietyproblem]

[houseofnadeen]

[anxietyproblem]

[remanence-of-love]

[moonlitdestruction]

Not a good day today..

So today is the 3 year anniversary of my grandma's passing. But I could have sworn it was tomorrow. I was working at IHOP at the time, so I knew it was around this time. But, I was mentally preparing myself for tomorrow being the day. Then I find out that it is today and it hit me like a ton of bricks. My head is throbbing like crazy from crying so hard. I wasn't expecting it and it was like a knife in the heart. My brain fog has been bad but I didn't realize it was that bad until now.

So, I'm spending the day taking it semi-easy. Watching some movies, doing some light cleaning and trying to find my bin of photos so I can enjoy some photos of my grandma. I miss her so much and all I can think of is her in the hospice bed in that nursing home covered in bruises. The sounds she made is replaying in my head as I type this. My "aunt" being the vapid bitch that she is, attacking me for visiting her before she passed, and not giving me the recipe book that my grandma wanted me to have or any of her ashes. That also hurts. Knowing that she used her death to hurt us more after the fact. Who does that?

I have a clip somewhere of my grandma laughing and saying the word "fuck" because she never cursed like that and she'd scold us if we did. She only said it that one time because my sister begged and pleaded for her to. I'm going to try and keep that good memory in my head instead of the bad. It's not easy, but I'm going to do my best.

I miss you, Josh Josh. ❤❤

[moonlitdestruction]

I've been in therapy for months now and I've made a lot of changes. I still have loads and loads of work to do but I'm grateful for the progress I've made so far. He made some comments/suggestions in todays session that has lead me to attempt to hop back to tumblr again as an outlet. I used to live on here daily, then I stopped and I couldn't tell you why. But, my carpal tunnel makes super frequent journal writing difficult right now. So, I'm going to give this a shot and see how it goes.

[autumn-leaves-winter-breeze]

[pictures-of-dogs]

why did mother nature make this creature unpettable

[bearotonin-international]

An act of divine cruelty