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[moriartyandseb-blog]

"In a world full of locked doors the man with the key is King, and Honey you should see me in a crown👑"

J. Moriarty

[moriartyandseb-blog]

And here's the reason I'd never trust myself to raise children

[moriartyandseb-blog]

It's weird how Moriarty is seen to be such a horrible character, but the actor Andrew Scott is honestly such a lovely and wonderful human being.

[unaverage-confessions]

Me: *tries to push people away because I want them to prove they won’t leave*

People: *get pushed away & leave*

Me:

[katimorton]

C-PTSD or Complex post traumatic stress disorder occurs when someone is repeatedly traumatized (ie. in war, abused for long periods of time, etc) and it can make relationships and life afterward very difficult. They state that those who suffer from complex PTSD have more issues with: 1. Emotion regulation 2. Forgetting traumatic events completely 3. Self-perception (feel very ashamed and guilty for struggling with this and not feeling “okay” like everyone else). 4. Distorted perceptions of their perpetrators 5. Relations with others (they may isolate or struggle to trust people) 6. Their own sense of meaning (may feel hopeless and struggle to have faith). The treatment is pretty much the same as it is for PTSD, however there is an intense focus on interpersonal difficulties. They focus on this because those with repeated trauma have more trouble trusting, not lashing out, feeling safe, and managing their feelings of shame and guilt. Now BPD or borderline personality disorder is a pervasive disorder where we can show patterns of instability in our relationships, struggles with self image, and impulsivity. In order to be diagnosed with BPD you must have 5 of the following 9 criteria: 1. Fear of abandonment 2. Unstable relationships 3. Unstable sense of self. 4. Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors 5. Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, threats or self injurious behavior. 6. Extreme emotional/mood swings 7. Chronic feelings of emptiness 8. Inappropriate or intense & explosive anger 9. Feeling suspicious of people or out of touch with reality (severe dissociative symptoms). By simply going through the 2 diagnosis you can see how much symptom overlap there is. Therefore many people get misdiagnosed with BPD when it should be PTSD and visa versa. Also, many people could meet the criteria for both diagnosis (recent studies show that 24% of those with PTSD also had BPD & 30% of those with BPD also had PTSD). So let’s get into the main differences between the 2: 1. BPD does not require a traumatic event to be diagnosed and C-PTSD does. 2. The treatment plan for C-PTSD is to focus on healing or processing through the traumatic event(s) while BPD’s goal is to resolve any injurious urges and learn how to better manage our emotions. 3. While both diagnosis do show symptoms of emotion dysregulation, they are expressed very differently. In C-PTSD it is expressed through emotional sensitivity, reactive anger and poor coping skills (alcohol or drug abuse, etc). BPD on the other hand while it may show some of those signs, it’s much more common for someone with BPD to struggle with suicidal thoughts and self injurious behavior when experiencing emotional dysregulation. 4. In BPD most patients do experience some fear of abandonment, and that is not part of any criteria associated with PTSD. I could honestly go on and on about the difference and similarities, but the important thing to remember is that only YOU know your symptoms best. Keep track of them, bring that information into your next appt with your therapist or doctor. That way we can ensure that you are getting the treatment that is right for you. Because as I just mentioned, the goals of treatment for BPD versus C-PTSD are very different, and therefore we need to make sure our diagnosis fits. Also, if you are worried that you struggle with BPD please look into Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and if you are concerned you may have PTSD please look into seeing a trauma specialist.

[letsgetuncomfortablecomic]

All about EMDR! A lot of people have been asking me how it works, so I made a silly little comic doodle on Illustrator (just with my mouse, sorry it’s sloppy) about my experiences with it. *I am by no means a doctor, so please do some research on your own before making any decisions to do EMDR!*

I’ve also seen a lot of videos on Youtube of “DIY EMDR,” I would VERY STRONGLY recommend NOT using those. EMDR opens your emotional brain up so fully that it’s very overwhelming, and having a trained professional there to assist you is invaluable. 

[ladymarlboro]

[parentless-suggestions]

Triggers aren’t always obvious and your responses to things that remind of abuse may not be what you expect.

Sometimes you feel bad or uneasy without knowing why. Or you feel overwhelmed and sick out of the blue and it disappears as quickly as it appears, leaving you clueless as to what just happened.

Sometimes the trauma response is stored in your body instead of your mind and you don’t even realize you are being triggered.

Here are some physical sensations that may happen when something reminds you of your trauma or when someone’s words/behaviors remind you of your parents’ abuse style:

You may feel sleepy all of a sudden, as though your body is trying to shut down to escape

Your heart rate, blood pressure, pulse, and breathing rate may increase (fight or flight, adrenaline response)

You may feel hot as though you have a fever or you may feel chilled as though the temperature just dropped

Your palms may become clammy or you may sweat

You may shiver or shake, hands becoming unsteady

Your whole body may ache, your joints might stiffen, a random muscle or body part may hurt or twitch or tingle or go numb for no apparent reason, with the pain going away just as randomly

You may feel dizzy or lightheaded, or have a sudden stomachache or feel like you’re going to throw up

Your throat may feel tight, your lips tingling or quivering, you may feel a lump in your throat as though an object you can’t swallow away is lodged firmly in your flesh

You may feel tearful without tears spilling over, or may cry without noticing any particularly strong emotion

Your surrounding sensory stimulation may become suddenly overwhelming out of all proportion to how you normally process sensory input, without you having overexerted yourself or without any buildup in exposure to strong sensory experiences;

for example, you may be at home, relaxed, when there’s an unexpected knock on your door and suddenly you’re too aware of everything around you noticing things you don’t normally and not able to tune things out

Or conversely, you may go numb, your senses dulled, your mind blank every time you talk to a particular coworker

These are not exhaustive but may help you realize other things that are triggers if you pay attention to signals your body is sending you

-kitten

[thejabberwock-blog1]

Dean Winchester and Selective Mutism in 13.21

I just wanted to point out that in between Dean screaming No! when Cas said Sam was gone, and telling Mary he needed to go get Sam’s body–ie, once he had a purpose again in taking care of Sam, which is the key here–Dean didn’t speak once. In fact, they made a point of showing us his silence. It was even juxtaposed with Dean hearing Sam screaming his name as he walked, blankly onward, in silence. 

He pointedly, and silently, ignored the attempt at platitudes, and he didn’t even say anything to Mary either when he saw her. He couldn’t even tell her Sam was dead. This was a great parallel to Mary’s death, the death that altered his life and ultimately formed who he would become. Just like Sam’s death would for Dean now. He was running on autopilot, out of touch with everything outside himself. 

Dean told us in 1.03 that after Mary died, he didn’t talk after her death.

The choice to bring Dean back to silence after Sam’s death was well done. It told us everything we needed to know about Dean and how Sam’s death would destroy him.