The Contiuing Saga Of Monique's Uptown Problems

My stories of and thoughts on chaotic, fun adventures from unfortunate events and unusual circumstance

[mothemermaid]

Party???

I’m slowly but surly learning more and more about myself, and so excited for it! I went to a party last night and because of my past experiences with social anxiety at parties, decided taking a shot of vodka, a shot of tequila and a shot of jameson would be the perfect pregame. I get there and it’s all good, im smoking drinking just chillin, but then I for some unknown reason think I need to go I just start feeling like everyone is taking about me and I gotta go. Eventually these two girls that are good friends say that I just need to dance, and they keep telling me to just do it! and i should have, every time I over think it all and chicken out. This girl told me to have a goal for the night. It’s like they all know what I’m thinking but I’m like do they really? I should have just went for it. I wanted to chill with everyone and dance and just party, but I didn’t know anyone and I wanted someone to start it hahaha.... next time I will!!! I’m now determined to party and let loose. I’m tired of hiding in my shell, it’s pretty but it’s not fitting anymore! I will just party! I’m done being afraid. I just want these kids to think I’m cool, but I’ve now realized I don’t care, as long as I feel cool I will be! And I should just do what makes me feel cool, all that really matters is what I think of myself and how I’m making me feel! Next time I will accomplish my goal! I’ll do exactly what I want because there isn’t a reason I can’t. 

[mothemermaid]

The Best Part

I failed to mention in my last post a part of this memory that makes it so special to me. As my friends start winding down and curling up for the night I start packing up. As I climb down the ladder No says “you can stay... but you’re already leaving so see ya” I leave get halfway back to my tent then realize I left all the tree I just bought in the treehouse, I drive back and pick it up then stay because I’m already so tired and I didn’t realize before that it would be cool for me to stay. I smoke a little more before I’m really ready to knock out. Being late August it’s still beautiful out, but the increased wind from being so high up made it a little chilly and there was only one blanket, luckily Noah is chivalrous and cuddled up with me so I stayed warm, and there are very few times that falling asleep curled up with someone who’s company you enjoy an enormous amount isn’t the finest way to fall asleep. The next morning the sun shining on my face is what brought me out of my sleeping state. At that time I realized that I wanted the sun to be who woke me every morning there could be nothing better than being brought out of my slumbers by it’s warm embrace. It wasn’t as hard to fall asleep on a hardwood floor as I would have thought, but I for sure had some aches the next day that I can’t lie I didn’t partially welcome, not as if I could forget about it but I choose the think of them as a reminder that often times I’ll experience the most beautiful moments without any intention of them being important at all something to help make the next day full of long drives, plane rides, and airport chillin not as sucky, because my head was still stuck among the trees. 

[mothemermaid]

Take Off  9/30/16

For the last 19 and a half years I've lived in Fort Lame, IN. Tomorrow is the day I venture into a new world. I want nothing more than to have a night full of fun, cherished memories that I’ll take with me around the world. After I got off my somewhat typical serving job at a super laid back Irish pub, I realized I didn’t have too many friends, seems how I have no one to hang out with on my last night in Indiana I drive back to the tent I’ve been living in for about a month, a story for another time. While at a red light on my drive home I happen to spot a few super cool dudes I met for the first time a couple weeks before at another good friends house, as I stare at them from under my floral baseball cap they all begin to point at the random girl staring at them. When the light turns green I floor it home and as I start to DM Nomo, because I forgot to get their numbers when we did kick it, he DMs me... “Hey I think I was pointing at you at a red light” ecstatic that they recognized me I reply “ Yeah! I thought it was you guys, it’s my last night here do you wanna come chill at my tent and smoke I was about to start a fire”,    “Do you wanna chill in a tree house?” how could I say no? “Hell yeah” his response was just an address, when I get there I don’t immediately see a tree house, as I’m about to message him I decide I’ll find it myself because I’m a great explorer and I couldn’t be too far considering I had the address, just as I’m about to give up my explorer status and tell them I can’t find it I see an amazing treehouse behind, or maybe across from a red house that caught my eye. The climb up was a bit brutal, first a rope up to the separation of the base of the tree, then a short ladder up into the tree house. I made a real fool of myself trying to climb up this rope. Imagine the tree being a glass wall, and unscalable, that’s what it became 3/4 of my way up and I loose my footing I hang there swinging around trying to climb this tree all while the tall, dark, and handsome No is trying to pull me up, once I finally make it with “a little” help from my friends I make it. I arise to a cozy wooden room, christmas lights hanging from the ceiling and drawings on the walls. As I settle down next to Selena, No comes back up “Well now we can all make fun of you”,  

“For what?”, 

“That ascent”

... “Ooohhh, that was really embarressing ” it was if I had completely forgotten the struggle I had just endured to get there.  Anyways it was truly one of my favorite nights, as was the night I first met them a night I will never forget and all ways keep close to my heart. We drank a little, smoked alot and listened to the most emotionally gratifying and draining music I had ever had the pleasure of being present for. These dudes are really the most empathetic people I’ve met. I never even have to tell them how I feel, Aden (Tarazan) magically knows the perfect songs to play for every moment. We all shared a beautiful moment listening to a song in Italian, the chorus translating to It’s time to say goodbye and I still don’t know if they know I feel like they must be able to read my emotions as hard as that is to believe seems how I usually couldn’t say how I feel in any clear way or if they just have lucked out 2 of the 2 times we’ve chilled and I can’t help but think they are probably some of the coolest people in this world. 

[halloweenskellington]

[mermaidsandfishsticks]

Both

[flynn-jpg]

Find someone who makes you feel drunk when you’re sober

(via expiry)

[dailyastro]

Sagittarius 17328: Visit The Daily Astro for more facts about Sagittarius.

You’ll love reading all the always popular astrology and zodiac intuition on the best site for free astrology info.

[wont-time-love-us]

It’s both nice and heartbreaking to realize where you stand with someone because on one hand god, finally, the mystery is solved no more sleepless nights no more questions you know now and you don’t have to wonder but on the other hand all those clocks in your head that were counting down till the next time you talked to him have stopped because you know there won’t be a next time you can finally stop struggling to keep swimming and just let yourself drown safe in the knowledge that he won’t save you you can stop feeling so lost because you know he won’t find you. so yes, you can start being okay again but first you must let yourself remember what it’s like to fall apart.

It’s done– Lily Rain (via wont-time-love-us)

[gotdamndee]

[caseyjoneshighoncocaine]

hahahah this would be me 

[delicatepoetry]

i made up love where there was none. i grabbed the morsels of like and formed them into a heart with my fist, i held on so tight. i laid down in your bed, and for a moment i was convinced i molded into your sheets. a stain you’d never get out. a piece of me was left there, for you. my hair strands were hung against your pillow, little reminders of me. you washed the sheets the next morning, i was a mess. i cover my lips in red, and you never kiss me after. the mark of me, you say, is too bright to wear. the world may see that you imprinted on me. and my heart shakes a little, like the hands it’s kept in have started to sweat, it starts to slip. i ache today. from my head to my heart, and i can’t grasp the fact i need to face. that i, am just a soon to be memory. a face you’ll remember at 50, but i’ll still be 17 in the picture. a care you couldn’t give, a midnight kiss on the 1st. a walk on the beach, an affair. a girl you didn’t love. to you, i was a moment. never a forever. and maybe i knew that all along.

i.c. // ..and love should never be forced (via delicatepoetry)

[fr6ntic]

Vintage Juicy Jay’s

[vanessahudgensfashionstyle]

Vanessa Hudgens Beauty Coach photoshoot (August 2015)

[silenceformysoul]

Charles Napier Kennedy (1852–1898) - The Fountain of Youth, 1892

[souschen]

i think instead of the woman taking her husband’s name when they get married or doing the hyphenated thing

couples should just smash their last names together

so like if a Smith married a Grabowski you could be Smabowski or Grabith or Grasmithski

and then as the generations go on the names just get more and more ridiculous

[radioheade-moved-blog-blog]

why aren’t we doing this

[femgermania-blog]

you mean last names should be ship names

[homerically]

I’m a firm believer in this

[m0skwa]

[rumineely]

[oblwankenobi]

[mothemermaid]

Well, on my planet, we have a legend about people like you. It’s called Footloose. And in it, a great hero, named Kevin Bacon, teaches an entire city full of people with sticks up their butts that, dancing, well… is the greatest thing there is.

[jenny-jinya]

I think this is important knowledge