MR BONES' MEGA BLOG

I AM MR BONES THIS IS MY BLOG

[mrbonesdaddyo]

[mrbonesdaddyo]

my BIRTHDAY

TODAY is MY BIRTHDAY which accordingly (if my calculations are correct) MARKS MY 130TH YEAR ON THIS PLANET! while the conglomerate has admittedly been struggling to accrue the budget necessary for most traditional birthday festivities - LARGELY due to TOTALLY STUPID current massive constraints concerning our newest serrated ceiling fan production line, which i terrifically helped champion in triumph - i am STILL EXCEEDINGLY happy to have FORTUNATELY, IN SPITE OF THE LACKADAISICAL LACKADAISIES UP AND DOWN AND ALL AROUND ME, received this WONDERFUL TERRIFIC confectionary WONDERLAND from my good friend and dentured servant HELPFUL. HAROLD. an infinite shout out to him! i am shouting out to harold! a shout! a great big shout out! shout! a big old yelp to my friend harold! big old bellowing shriek for the man of the hour!

today i do not have many truly birthday-centric plans and FUCKFORTUNATELY there is really no room to make any (a reason being several machinations have gotten uppity again and smashed through containment which calls for the routine roundup race) BUT i still greatly adore the sentiment of spending a national holiday with my many allies coconspirators accomplices and whatnot and soforth and suchandsuch today to hopefully make things POP a bit more i and several of the ministers have put in the GREATLY excruciating effort of rigging a portion of the conglomerate grounds with feisty devices! carl has informed me with his lots of science degrees that the view will be "truly spectacular" and i hope that this BLOW-OUT will hopefully BLOW OUT the BAD VIBES that seem to swirl around and encircle this place like a gang of ravenous starving hawks picking off the weakest hireling employoids of the babbling bouncy bunch IT'S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE BIRTHDAY AND I'M READY FOR THE BLOW OUT!

[mrbonesdaddyo]

Hello "mrbonesdaddyo" I am an anonymous religious man on tumblr.com wondering if you would be willing and able to convert to Fishtianity. Fish Christ waits for YOU "mrbonesdaddyo" and only YOU can accept him into your heart.

i don't know who yo uare why are you contacting me what do yo uwant what does anyone want anymore what is that i don't even know what that is is that a fis his that a fis hreligio naround a fis hwhat is this what is it help

[mrbonesdaddyo]

THE HAPPIEST OF NEW YEARS from MR. BONES

I'D love to wish you all VERY MERRY POST CHRISTMAS NEW YEARS SEASON! let the year coming be ABSENT of terrors of all kinds, and may you be happy! happy happy!

[mrbonesdaddyo]

A MERRY CHRISTMAS to ALL and MAGICAL wishes of a great Christmas season from the Conglomerate team!

it comes once a year and TO ALL I AM WISHING a GOOD NIGHT!!! UNFORTUNATELY many of our executives have been UNABLE to arrive this winter season (peter, sorory, DAMN IT!) this is however "struck out" by the fact that i still have my good business partner CARL MCCARLSON! today i shall publish to him a reminder that should he LEAVE OUR corporation in any near future that i am aware of the paynes' and krackmans' locations! a jolly road trip would be in order should he be absent next christmas. he is here this year however and so i am a happy camper

[iddybittysnail]

do you guys ever get so scared that you start christmas caroling or is that just me

[celibatefish]

When I am scared I cry until the problem is resolved.

[mrbonesdaddyo]

THIS is a religious institution that i can FINALLY get on board with!!!! THANK YOU celibate fish

[mrbonesdaddyo]

REGARDING TUMBLR DOT COM

lord ceo mr bones here. it was under the BEST and least discretion of my various lawyers, certified legal partners, et cetera et cetera that i have devised the ULTIMATE idea of a TUMBLR! BLOG! alternative medicine has had diminishing returns for managing my angry moments so my team has decided this is the best course of action and i trust these men with what was my life

here i will post my many favorite things and also a number of my LEAST favorite things to what i hope will be the utmost satisfaction of my many fans. i will also share my many opinions and profound whatchamacallits regarding this universe. or whatever it is i think THIS IS NOT AN EXCUSE FOR MY ENEMIES TO CONTACT ME!!!! and this includes a certain unpleasant chainsmoker that i'd much rather not speak to on such an already spotless social record as this DNI name starts with "g" ends with "s" and you liek salad or whatever it was AND NO MANUFACTURERS OR PRODUCERS OR WHATEVER good lord