Saving the World; Losing My Mind

This is where I let the darkest parts of me out to play. Share my interests, vent about my issues and my past. Maybe I am crazy by society's standards... but I don't care. I need to let my demons breathe.

[no-wheree]

Here are some shots of the gayngels from Katsucon ♡

Crowley: @sob-wandoi

Aziraphale: @nothingofeden

[seth-the-hobbit]

[ID: the words “what a beautiful day to be queer” on the genderqueer, nonbinary, transgender, agender, trans feminine, trans masculine, genderfluid, bigender, demiboy and demigirl flags]

It’s a gorgeous day out, I’m feeling very queer and also in the mood to make something hence these.

Queer refers to anyone who considers themselves queer. If you don’t consider yourself queer then this post is not aimed at you.

I hope everyone is having a great day. Ba mhaith liom a bíonn sibh lá bréa againn

Post two of two

[queerpride]

*finger guns my way away from heterosexuality*

[vespaaurinkos]

crowley: describe yourself in one word

aziraphale: yours

crowley: disgusting

crowley:

crowley: say it again

[dec-d]

[msannethr0pe-blog]

Deleting all of my blogs due to Tumblr's crusade on sex workers and body positivity.

Bye y'all.

[trapcard]

scream @ “female presenting nipples”

[sexworkerhelpfuls]

tumblr is shutting everything down, not sure this blog will survive the cull

[thehungryhungryhooker]

December 17 is the day of remembrance for sex workers

[summerthestripper]

wow

[msannethr0pe-blog]

Done with tumblr!

[lifeinpoetry]

“Ask any woman & she’ll tell you why Eve bit / into that apple. Why she chose the universe instead / of you.”

— Topaz Winters, from “Witch in Red,” published in heather press

[sasaq]

[babygirls-sweetsurrender]

:-D

[msannethr0pe-blog]

Yo guys

So i met a new man and we're like a thing but nothing serious just getting to know each other and whatnot And its like weird being with a guy who actually treats me with respect and doesnt try to control me, shame me or make me feel insecure Like this is fucking weird to me The past 7 years of my life were dictated by 3 extremely abusive relationships. Physically emotionally verbally and mentally abusive. I pretty much had stockholm syndrome..... But this person... hes actually HONEST with me? Like he straight up from the start said he can see something growing with me but hes not ready to commit to anything yet. Told me he had something kinda going on with another lady but it wasn't really going anywhere and when we met he let her know he was seeing someone else. and that he wants me to know im free to see who i want and really do whatever i want and hes not gonna judge me I told him im gonna start dancing and he told me to do whatever my soul desires He told me he cares about me and when i told him about my past abuse he said i deserve better. And i like got overwhelmed with the kindness and respect and caring and straight up told him i love him after a night of tripping balls. He was like "honey we've been on 2 dates. It's way too early to say that". But he understood that I was also spun out and he didn't get all weirded out at me, he said he could see where I'm coming from cuz he sees us going somewhere, he understands why I want commitment but he's not out to fuck me over and he needs to get his life shit together before he thinks about a serious relationship because his last relationship kinda derailed his life. IM LIKE, SHOOK A RELATIVELY NORMAL GUY WITH A STABLE PERSONALITY WHO IS 100% HONEST AND REAL ABOUT HIS INTENTIONS TOWARDS ME DOESNT DRINK IS EXTREMELY AGAINST VIOLENCE TO WOMEN ACTUALLY RESPECTS PEOPLE PEOPLE GENUINELY LIKE HIM FOR HIS PERSONALITY AND SAY HES A TRULY KIND AND SMART PERSON IM FUCKING SHOOK I am just so excited to see where this goes and grows. It feels so good to share a healthy interaction with someone that isn't a mindgame. I just realized today that this is the best I have ever been treated by a man. No wonder i flipped and said I love you so fast! Is this my chance at normalcy? Ive been meditating a lot and my moods are getting more stable. he's very into meditation as well and just a very clear minded guy despite having ADHD struggles. I am happy. I feel the loving vibes. It makes my heart smile when he tells me that I make him happy!

[msannethr0pe-blog]

When ur fave porn blog hasn't updated in weeks and you're disappointed cuz no fresh content but also genuinely concerned for the blog owner cuz they usually update daily ?????

[the-queer-feminist]

A piece of the abundance of graffiti on the walls of my favourite place.

[psych2go]

[msannethr0pe-blog]

I'm dealing with a breakup after 3 years of dating an alcoholic who may be bipolar or narcissistic but is completely untreated for any mental health. He cheated on me and did really grimey things behind my back a lot. Lied to me more times than I will ever know. Prob more than I can count. But its tearing me apart. I'll split and text him awful things saying i hate him for screwing me over, then within a few hours or less i go back and love him so much, miss him so much. I burst into tears randomly and its hard to pull it together. I blame myself in ways, I was super possessive and paranoid (for good reason because of the constant lies) and never really trusted him after the first incident. I was physically violent at times. I am ashamed of my behavior. But I've been in therapy for a couple years now working on bpd/ptsd stuff, and I'm committed to getting help for my problems cuz i dont want to hurt those i love, and i want to be able to contribute and reach my goals and live a normal life. I seem to be at my worst, most volatile/unstable self when I get close to people. My relationships are tumultuous and I hate that. All i want is a love that lasts, with mutual trust and respect. It sucks that intense unstable relationships are a staple of this bpd life. My most favorite person, I also hate him! We talk occasionally as friends and hook up still... He's still very depressed. Unhappy with his life. Insecure. Drinking a lot. Doing drugs etc. has angry outbursts as well at times. I still love him so much. He said he still loves me once to me since we broke up, very emotionally, and when I asked him what he meant he said he was drunk and high and didnt mean it. So obviously that devastated me. I broke down and almost self harmed that night. I feel everything way too strong. To the point where it's like a sensory overload. I randomly feel like a piece of me is missing and like I've lost the man of my dreams, and I have to force myself to face the facts that this relationship was unhealthy and hes really not a very nice guy or good person... But I am still so in love. If he asked for me back I'd say yes. Even though at the same time I know he wont change and hed cheat again. And I would FREAK out just like I always do. And he will call me crazy and break up with me. And i will beg for him back. And he will take me back and it will happen again. I just want to be happy. Im happy alone but I do get lonely. But not lonely for anyone. Lonely for him. Sometimes I wake up so depressed just wanting to hold him. And then of course I text him. And we get together. And he holds me and it feels so good. And i just cry silently cuz an overwhelming amount of emotion is flowing through me. And hes like 100% emotionally dead unless hes pissed off or laughing at something. Ik he isnt really emotionless and he just acts that way, thats how he deals. Im just so different. I wish it was all different. I asked him if in 2-4 years if we're still friends and he's still unhappy with his apartment, job, etc, if he would move to cali with me. He said yes :) haha fuck

[galgadotsource]

I think women are amazing for being able to show what they feel. I admire women who do. I think it’s a mistake when women cover their emotions to look tough. I say let’s own who we are and use it as a strength.

[bpdanais-deactivated20170815]

Me, in tears: whatever tho I guess it doesn’t matter haha

[lyricalart]

Damn it feel good to have you, needing me, wanting me, giving me a chance to feel special to somebody in a world where they’re not loving me.

J. Cole (via lyricalart)