Helena knew when to meddle things and when not to. Most people did, by using their common sense, obviously. She was usually more careful with covering up her tracks and making sure she wouldn’t hit any problems along the way, but with this specific mission she knew that wasn’t going to be possible. To be honest, she knew she was a pain in the ass for Captain Rogers, but she was doing her job.
Even if she’d gone a bit rogue about it.
And she didn’t want to be a pain in the ass. With everything going on with the UN, Wakanda’s murdered leader, the Winter Soldier, the Sokovia Accords, it seemed as if everything was walking into a path of chaos. Though the world always seemed to be chaotic, or at least always have a twinge of a sense of disorganisation, she knew things were starting to go really bad. It felt like the sense of justice was slowly decaying, and though details were fuzzy about a lot of things, she knew she had to do her job and do her best. That’s all she could do.
When Helena had realised S.H.I.E.L.D was simply letting German forces and polices get to Barnes instead, she was in no way going to have to trust them to do their job and just stand by as a member of an audience. It wasn’t that she didn’t have faith in those forces, but she knew it would be too noisy and too risky. She knew she could do it, making sure to have back-up with her.
She did feel sympathy for Steve though, it was hard not to. From what she’d gathered, those two had been through quite a lot together. And though it was hard not to give into her sympathetic feelings, she knew she had to at least get the guy caught and interrogated. Give the government a chance of clearing things up.
But she would be lying if she said it wasn’t just a bit fun to piss Rogers off during the whole ordeal.
“Or rather, someone.” Helena retorted in a mild tone of voice, glancing down at the watch on her wrist. She knew she only had a certain amount of time before the GSF would get their hands dirty too, and that time had to be spent wisely. “Listen, I don’t want it to end up like this. But it’s work, I do what I do, you do what you do. And I’m guessing you’re going to want to stand in my way, so I’ll have to stand in yours.”
38 seconds ‘til she had to enter.
Thinking back to the war was never quite… pleasant. Though Bucky knew the friendships he’d gained with the Howling Commando’s had been a pro to all the many cons, there were still cons enough to outweigh any pros there ever could have been. Maybe the beginning war had actually been the easiest part- Since what had really messed him up was everything that occurred in between and after.
The war itself gave him flashbacks enough. Blood-soaked uniforms, broken dog tags, disgusting drenches. It hurt enough to be there himself, but what was worse was when his best friend just had to get himself into it too. And though he knew they both were just men, trying to do something good for their country and offer their service, he still didn’t want Steve there.
War was a place where the friends you made were quickly lost in one way or the other, though death was by far the worst abductor. And no way in hell did he want to have to watch Steve sacrifice himself for the war, but it seemed like Bucky had been the one to get the tough, uneasy road when Hydra got to him and dug their claws into him.
Even more blood-soaked uniforms. Shattered name-tags that he had broken. The endless testing and brainwashing. It was all so much worse and so much harder to forget.
It seemed like the only thing that kept him going was the faint memories that at times came to him. As a fog and a haze, just barely there, always slipping through the gaps between his fingers when he tried to grasp it. And in that fog was Carman. Before his Hydra days he’d been planning to confess something important to her after he could return home from the war, tell her how much she truly meant to him. But any ideas of that were quickly ripped from him. In all senses, and he was just left to his haze and his confusion, though much more stuff was coming back to him.
Such as Steve. Such as Carman.
“No, no, I get it. I’m pretty much the same.” Bucky smiled a bit sheepishly and awkwardly, hoping he didn’t seem to out of it. It was as if his mind was constantly switching between memories he was recalling and the face in front of him, who, despite not matching the one in his blurred collection of moments, still had a twinge of familiarity to it. The name. The voice. He didn’t know what to make of it.
And she only seemed more distinct when she said his name.
“Oh, uhh, sure. I’d like that.”
