“That shit I said at the club was bullshit and am sorry that I hurt you…I don’t wanna to hurt. You’re my princess….. why the fuck I wanna see you cry….”
You didn’t break eye contact with him during his long and sincere apology, not once.
Your breathing was steady but you felt vulnerable and confused. You didn’t know whether to trust him or not.
What if he’s lying to you?
What if he’s just stringing you along?
You’ve heard that some guys do this to girls as a way to show power and how dominant they are just to boost their own ego.
What if this was the case?
The stunt he pulled at his friends Birthday party did so much damage to the trust you had built with him. The whole situation was such a huge mess and it didn’t help that you started finales next month.
Thumb in your mouth and your eyes scanning the ground you tried to think. Erik noticed the nervous tick you had when you were overthinking things. He’d seen you bit your thumb when you waited for test results or that time you thought you were pregnant and you waited for the stick to reveal the truth. Over the 6 months, he had learned that the nervous tic was his cue to comfort you.
He started walking towards you. You could see his form getting closer. Tinah slipped past you, to stand in front of you but Erik didn’t stop walking. You grabbed Tinah’s waist and took one large step back pulling her with you. The action made it very obvious to Erik that you didn’t want him in your territory.
This was the first time you had every rejected Erik’s advance’s to you. A painful sting grabbed your heart. All of sudden you felt naked and guilt again. The same feeling you had in the shower, only now it was amplified. It hurt to not give Erik what he wanted.
He wanted you ..and you wanted him to want you because you loved him but he fucked up…bad.
At this point, you felt somewhat relieved yet angry at the same time. You now knew you meant something to him and he loved you just like you loved him. Meaning that you weren’t stupid or some side piece. What angered you is how eager you were ready to forgive him. Like a skydiver ready to jump out the plane without checking their parachute first.
You couldn’t help yourself.
You felt your body slowly reject Tina’s arm around your waist and you slowly make your way to Erik. Not breaking eye contact he meets you half way not quite sure to expect from you. He had told himself a slap to the face and some silent treatment ways expected for his behavior so he flinched a bit when you reached out for the side of his face. You missed the texture of his beard, it was softer then it looked. He immediately leaned into your soft hand still not breaking eye contact with you. He wanted to pull you closer by your waist but he didn’t want to scare you off.
He didn’t even think you would ever touch him after the birthday party incidence. He was very grateful.
You brushed your thumb over his lips and left cheek. A small smiled appeared on his face. He started gaining hope that his baby was coming back to him. That he was forgiven.
“N'jadaka…“ You softly called him
As if he knew whom you were talking about he quickly answered.
“..and the little girl at the club?”
“Take her off your off your IG.”
“Its already done.“ You could see he was happy you were asking these. He wanted to tell you that he did nothing with them without being forward. He looked hopeful again.
Probably telling himself that this whole thing was over now. Things were going back to normal. You pulled him into a deep kiss. He needed this from you. This confirmation. You didn’t hold back. throwing your arms around his neck and even giving off a low moan. But you quickly pulled away to find him a bit dizzy wanting more from you.
“Erik…“ You held out your hand
“The UBER we called ain’t gonna pay its self..“
He quickly pulled his wallet out. Placing 100 bucks in your hand.
“Go home, Erik. I’ll call you when we get back.”
You folding the money and put it in your bra
“Wait, what?… You still going out.“ he was so confused and disappointed. He wanted to spend the night with you. Not necessary fucking but he pictured you in his arms sleeping or talking. After everything, he thought, you would want to spend more time with him and boy was he wrong?
You and Tinah were looking like Beauty guys dressed in fashion Nova and he thought you were going back to your dorm just cause he apologize. He should know you better than this.
“Yeah, we going, … Goodnight.“
You turned your back walking away from him. Grabbing Tinah’s and you entered the UBER. You apologized for making him wait but he said there was no problem.
"Finally we leave. I really thought you were going to leave me hanging.“ Tinah said as she tried to reapply your lipstick.
"After everything you’ve done for me…never.” She smiled and gave you a wink.
"Okay, so my plan is we meet the tinder date, he takes us out then-“ You cut her off
"Tinah we’re not meeting him or going to the club anymore. I -” Then she quickly cut you off
"Bitch then where the fuck is we going then if we’re not going to turn up and meet this nigga.“
"The whole reason for me going out was to get revenge on Erik. I don’t need to do that anymore. He apologized. Now we could do whatever we want."
"Yeah! And what we want is to turn up.”
"..But I never party without Erik..“ Tinah deadpanned
"You’re killing me (Y/N) …we really out here dressed like the fucking Kardashians and you want to go back home."
"No. We can have dinner or we can go to that pizza place Malik told us about, he seemed to really like their pizza.” Tinah was not having it with your ass. Tinah was ready to watch you turn up and be happy. After everything, she just wanted to see you enjoy yourself but no, your loyal ass just had to spoil things.
"Maybe we can get some street food, anything you want it’s on me.“ You taped your bra that housed Erik’s money and smiled and her disappointed face.”
You managed to ask the UBER to change the destination to a popular local food spot. He agreed.
"I can’t believe this….“ Tinah stated as took her fifth bite out of her Bunny Chow
“Hey! Don’t eat so fast you still need to leave some room for your Jollof rice and Kirsa ." You warned her.
You couldn’t stop giggling as she ate the African cuisine blissfully. You had taken her to one of Erik’s favorite Restaurant. A successful African Restaurant that severed the most juices and spiciest African dishes in Massachusetts.
Erik took you their one day and you fell in love with the place and Jafari the owner. He was such a bubbly man who had so much energy. The tall dark man who always tipped his hat off when he greeted you. He was sweet and innocent. His wife, Nandi ran the kitchen, you never saw her much but when you did she was always in a beautiful African print apron with a head wrap that matched.
"You like it?” You asked as ate you own spoon full of food.
"Yes. This is amazing. Why haven’t you bought me here before ?? Is this how African bitches get thick? By eating all of this? I don’t blame them. #Metoo.“
"Maybe you should order some for Malik. I know his Basketball ass will love this.”
"You need to stop making fun of how much Malik eats.“ You shook your head and took a sip of your Coke.
"Tinah your man eat SIX BURGER…MEALS on our road trip to New York and that’s like a 4-hour drive. Erik was so mad. He thought he was going to dirty his Jeep. Such a foolish man.”
Jafari came to your table holding a small plate of rice.
“How are the ladies doing today?"
"Were doing lovely Jafar, I want you to meet my good friend Tinah. She absolutely loves the food, you will be seeing more of her now."
"Yes, We welcome everyone. The only thing you need to bring is an empty stomach.” You all laughed and accepted the rice from his hands.
“Where is Erik today?” Tinah’s face dropped. You were thankful he didn’t notice. “..He was feeling a bit sick so he stayed at home but ill bring him some leftovers for sure.”
He believed your lie and asked about school and other things. In the middle of your conversation that surprisingly Tinah was heavily involved in a tall man walked into the entrance. He was very good-looking and dressed in Afro inspired type garments. Much to your surprise, you weren’t the only one who noticed him enter. The whole restaurant looked up and noticed his presence. He was followed by 3 strong women in red body suits that were decorated in rich orange patterns. They looked so intimidating like they could really do some serious damage to whoever tried anything with them. Behind his shoulder, a slim girl with braids followed just next to him. You thought it was maybe his wife or girlfriend but as her youthful face came into view you scratched that right out of your head. Maybe she was a sibling or his daughter.
Jafari cursed under his breath, straightened his posture and walked towards the strangers. He was very polite to them, too polite. He kept his distance but led them to a table that was at the back of his restaurant. It was in view but Tinah had to keep on turning to see the sight.
"He fine…..“ Tinah announced
"The man scares the restaurant and you think his fine.” You took a sip of your coke and wiped your lip
"Yes, he is. Just cause I have a man doesn’t mean I cant approach fineness.“
"He seems like a big deal… Do you think those women are his …bodyguards.”
"I don’t know but I mean someone has to protect the fines.“
"Maybe you should ask him to rearrange them guts. He looks like his packing heavy meat.” she bit her lip
"No. Hell no I have a -“ She cut you off
"No, you don’t have a man."
"You have a nigga who’s playing your emotions that is what you have."
"We just need time.” You told yourself
“Times for things to fall apart …sure” You made a face and smacked your teeth. “I mean damn who’s side or you on T”
"Am on your vagina’s side" You both laughed
"For someone who loves the matters of the flesh…… you have such a strong and healthy relationship" Tinah didn’t believe that just left your mouth. She was happy and felt honored for some reason but she didn’t show it.
"… I mean it’s okay..“ she said
"No, it’s not okay. You have stability and trust……I want that. I really do. I have no problem commenting to someone who will love and treat me right. ” Tinah held your hand since you looked sad.
“…You’re going to be a highly educated black woman… No black man is gonna want that.” You burst out laughing. She was noting expecting that response.
"Okay ..whatever? Where the bathroom at?” you told her where it was and she left you alone.
You thought about what she said and meant but you didn’t want to worry yourself. As you waited for Tinah to finish up in the bathroom you felt a pair of eyes on you. You looked around the restaurant and no one was looking at you. It happened again and just by chance you saw the man from before stealing a glance at you. He turned away and smiled to himself.
You tried to mind your own business but you wanted to look at him so bad. He just oozed confidence and he demanded attention from those around him. You sneaked a look. He was eating and making conversation with the young girl next to him.
They had matching bracelets, looked like grey or black balls linked together. Even the 3 women had the beads. You scanned his body. How he sat down. Thick legs wide open… Probably the worst moment of your life, when you looked back up to his face, he was watching you.
You almost jumped out of your skin.
You were so embarrassed. If he was some other guy you wouldn’t care but He seemed so important. You bite your thumb and looked down. Not trusting yourself to steal a peek at the handsome man who made your heart beat faster.
You hated how interested you were in this stranger, you hated how his soft eyes made your heart skip. You shouldn’t be feeling these feeling towards another man ….or women because you have Erik.
Erik loves you and you love him ….so why were you basically eye fucking some guy you didn’t know. It had been a while since you got physical with him so maybe you just needed some dick?? The thought made you laugh because it was silly and maybe a little bit true.
Your smile fell as you saw the man, you made caught staring at you at least 6 times now making his way to your table. The 3 terrifying but beautiful women following him. The young lady stayed back laughing and eating her food.
His was probing going to ask you why you were looking at him.
This was not going to end well.
You didn’t know what to do.
Do you look away and act like you didn’t see him?
All your thoughts stopped coming in when you heard his voice speak to you. “Entle….(Beautiful)"
You didn’t know what that meant but you knew it was something good. The smile he had when he said that phrase confirmed that.
"Pardon?” You didn’t recognize your voice as it came out. It was sweet and pretty high.
Why was he making you nervous?
"May I have a seat?“ His accent was differently African
"I couldn’t help but notice you when I walked in. It is my first time eating here and I’m happy I chose to eat here rather than somewhere else. "
You blushed …like a full ass blush, When was the last time you blushed?
"I love the food here. It’s very authentic and filling, You should cum more often.” Emphasizing the word cum. You wanted to slap yourself.
You couldn’t understand why you just said that. You could have easily said Visit. Like any other normal English speaker!
You knew what you were doing was wrong to Erik. But damn it felt good. You loved how his eyes lit up at each word you pronounced. And how every 5 to 10 words he would scan your lips.
“Are they making you uncomfortable?” He asked pointing at the 3 women behind him.
"NO.No.Not at all…They look very pretty" You tried to whisper to him but the smile on one of their faces told you-you failed.
“Am Tchalla and beautiful lady is…"
Wait, I’m for the beautiful lady?
"Well (Y/N). Just (Y/N) am going to be staying in the USA for about a month and some days. If you ever have some time or have any trouble with anyone. You should call me.“
"And how would I reach a man like you.” you didn’t know where you got this newly found confidence.
"Your phone" He put his large hand out as he asked for your phone. He put in his number under T’challa.
"We’re at the Four Seasons Hotel?” you almost chocked
"In New York.“ He nodded his head and stood up
"I’m afraid I need to leave…… or our flight might leave us. It was a pleasure meeting you (Y/N). I hope I get to see your face again.
” He gave you a slight nod and left his female companies chasing after him, You were so shocked and confused.
What the fuck just happen and where the hell is Tinah.
"OmG girl I saw the whole thing" she popped out of nowhere.
"Where were you I was so scared.“
"I don’t know of doing something I would regret. “
"If you say Erik’s name am walking away.” You bite your lip and looked down at Tchalla’s contact profile on your phone..
"He said he at The Four Seasons Hotel in New York. He got money. “ You told her
"You say that like its a bad thing."
"Yeah…, guys who have money tend to attract more females Tinah ….which mean more competition and you know I don’t want that in a relationship….. ……I don’t want to leave Erik…I don’t want to…I’ve been easily curving nigga since me and Erik been together why is it so hard now… "
"You really want me to answer that?”
"No.“ The mood and atmosphere was down now. You started doing what you’ve been putting off. Thinking about the future of your relationship with Erik. The UBER ride back was quiet and you were glad Tinah gave you that time to think about everything. You tried thinking about the good times more than the bad times. To be honest there weren’t many 'bad times’ with Erik. The 6 months was pretty chilled and blissful but you were afraid that in the future he would diss own you again.
Make you rethink his love for you again.
You tried hard to not cry in the car and you didn’t.
Erik had apologies because he made the mistake now it was time for you to forgive him.
The UBER fist dropped Tinah off at Malik’s place, at the side of campus then took you to yours. You were shocked to see the black jeep still packed in the same space. It was 12:42 at night and Erik was still here. You got out the UBER and checked if he was in the car. He wasn’t. You went up the stairs to your dorm room. No lights were on and everything was still in place.
You entered your room to find him sleeping in your bed, half naked. His broad brown shoulders that were covered in scars were exposed from soft blanket. The sight brought tears to your eyes. He looked so soft and innocent. You never wanted him to hurt you and you never want to hurt him and you had to let him know that everything is okay.
You took of your high heel boots and placed them in your shoe rack as well at your rings, clothing, and wig. You did you skin and hair routine and then tried to wake him up.
"Baby. You back…… Am sorry I waited for the-” You spot him
“It’s okay E. I just want to tell you something.”
He pulled himself up and pulled you closer to him. The room was barely lit but you could see he was nervous. You took his hand and squeezed it.
"I …. did a lot of thinking and …I forgive. Sometimes I don’t understand how your brain works but I love you and so do you …..right?“
"Absolutely. Without question.” He said smiling.
“You want to know where Tinah and I went today…” He thought about the question.
“No, I trust your thick ass.” You smiled. You were happy that he was coming back to his old self. You didn’t want him to look and feel guilty all the time, it didn’t look good on him.
“You’ll never hurt me again?"
"Never!” You kissed him and he pulled you on him making it easier to straddle his legs. This is what you wanted. To be free of this heavy burden. You grabbed his dreads pulling his head back and looked into his eyes.
“Erik…Make love to me.” You didn’t need to tell him twice. He pushed you onto your back and took his time with you. Putting your needs first making you moan his name out loud in pleasure. He was grateful for your existence and he was not going to fuck it up again. You were expecting him to hold back but he didn’t and you loved that. It was very emotional as well with slow and deep strokes and a lot of eye contact. It felt so real and pure.
He showed you how much he appreciated you with his body. After making you cum more than you ever in your life.
That was officially the best night of your life. You laid on his chest and fell asleep.
Things were back to fucking normal. Erik was a loving BOYFRIEND. Yes Every time you could call him your boyfriend, you did!
At the bank, post office, food market, library, class, gym or even at home with your family.
He was fine with it and over it that it became an inside joke for that both of you.
“You want me to get Erik. You mean…Erik …my boyfriend?” You said to Malik one day as he waited for him with his basketball at the door. “
Ahhhh cut that shit out (Y/N) people are going to think crazy."
"Like who …my B O Y F R E I N D?” the both of you laughed as Erik left for practice.
A few weeks went by and you had forgotten about T'challa who was lowkey trying to be you Sugar Daddy and Tinah had finally forgiven Erik for everything. Now the only thing you had to worry about was Exams.
You spent most of your time with Erik, Tinah, and Malik studying in the library quietly. By far Erik was enrolled in the hardest course but that was on him. You sometimes felt sorry for him, smuggling coffee and energy bars into the library so he could get his get levels up. This was always met with a kiss on the lips.
One day you left them alone at the library because you didn’t feel well and you wanted to go lay down. You told Erik not to worry and that you would see him at night when he’s done studying. You packed your bag and left them. You took a shower when you arrived and got into your pajamas.
You heard your phone buzzing in your bag which was weird. Your phone was never on vibrate. It was either on silent or loud and just as you thought. It wasn’t yours but Erik’s. Before you could throw it back into your bag and go to sleep. One notification stood out to you.
A message from A…. Cassie.
Am sure its not the Cassie I know right?
You opened the messages and read the whole thing aloud not believe what was leaving your mouth
Cassie I told you not to hit me up.
Oh come one Erik !!! Talk to me am so bored and lonely.
I suggest you find a hobbie then
Erik are you acting like this just because of that girl that cuffed you.
Erik didn’t answer until they started texting recently again
I cant tell you over text.
I dont have time for these games Cassie
You think am a game Erik?
Cassie what can I help you with….
Erik I’m pregnant……am sorry
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