Becoming a mother doesn't have to mean loosing friends.
When you become a mum, it's a given that a lot in your life is about to change and unfortunately loosing friends can be one of them.. maybe you'll drift apart because you just don't have much in common any more or maybe they just couldn't adapt to the changes in your life. Or maybe they're no longer interested because nights out and spontaneous trips are a thing of the past. But at the end of the day if they don't make the effort to get to know the most important thing in your life why should you make the effort with them.
The positive thing is, being a mum is the perfect way to make new friends. Before you know it you'll have all these knew besties. The friend you had at school who reached after finding out she's pregnant knowing you've just been through it. That colluege who happened to fall pregnant at the same time as you. Or that neighbour you never spoke to before who has 2 kids. Suddenly you find yourself bonding over your kids but soon learn that's not all you have in common. They're the friends that speak your language, you find yourself sharing Labour stories, discussing the colour of your baby's poo and comparing bedtime routines... This could be the start of some life long friendships.
Youll have the friends thats are there through it all. The friends that are there before the baby, during the pregnancy, But most importantly, they are there after you become a mum.. Not just the first couple of weeks when it's all new and exciting but through it all!
The friends that offers to grab something from the shop on their way round.
They offer to take the baby off your hands so you can load the dishwasher or put the washing on.
The friends that understands that your always late! And are okay with it. They understand that you can only meet up between 2 & 4 because your life revolves around naps and feeds.
The ones that always offers to come to you because they know how much effort it takes just to leave the house, then offers to make you a cup of tea and hold the baby while you drink it.
And the friends that always makes sure they check in at least once a week to make sure your okay and your coping with this massive change in your life.
The friends who, whether they have a baby or not, they just get it!
We need to stop looking at it as loosing friends but finding out who your true friends are, and at the end of the day they are the only friends we need.
Surround yourself with people that care, ditch the people that dont and youll never feel alone. But remember it is 2 way street. Just coz you've had a baby, it doesn't mean you can completely slack at making the effort but being a mum, your priorities do change and your true friends will completely understand that!
Friendships don't always last forever and ending a friendship doesn't erase all the good times you shared. It just means you're entering a new chapter of your life. The most amazing one yet.
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amandla
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