Inactive @muppetjokernumbertwofan - Tumblr Blog

Croaker has returned

Thank you for telling me anon. Alas I have not checked Tumblr for a few weeks. I'm applying for jobs and the like and I got distracted with the holidays.

#the stuffing was soggy #the texture of stuffing is never good.#Its either too dry or too wet #And then not only was it soggy but it got drenched in gravy #I could not eat more than two bites #tmj number two fan answers asks

the-muppet-joker

I lie awake at night thinking about His Hole. Was any of it real? I can't hold my wife unless I imagine she is Kermit. I miss his squelch as I sopped him wet with my seed. "For the joke!" I cried. I would fill him with my nectar. And laugh, and laugh. Like some kind of joke(r). I miss you, Kermit. Don't tell my wife. Don't tell my wife.

muppetjokernumbertwofan

Couple's therapy?

muppetjokernumberonefan

I get the sense fathers is lurking

muppetjokernumbertwofan

Interesting...

#i wouldn't be surprised #maybe an alt?

elvis-official

Woah mama just reminding my followers that TERF ideology is fundamentally evil and not welcome anywhere near my blog hummina hummina hummina

eiderducksonofhumperdink

Protecting genuine women is „fundamentally evil“?

elvis-official

Protecting women is one of the most noble things you can do. Unfortunately you don't do that

anti-terf-posts

official anti terf post

elvis-official

Woah mama I'm getting certification now

numbers-on-pinterest

This did Numbers on Pinterest!

elvis-official

Fuck

numbers-on-pinterest

woah mama you breached containment with the "ill give anyone who misgenders you the elvis special" first but i have yet to reblog that one

elvis-official

Woah mama it's hard being on top of the world

regicidal-defenestration

One time I saw a fake headline about the Vatican announcing the virgin Mary's new nemesis, la puta Waría, and ever since that day I've quoted it like anybody else knows what I'm talking about

wyrmwhole

elvis-official

If the E stands for estrogen can the L stand for lesbian

Woah mama I'm Estrogen Lesbian Vic michaelis Interesting Serve

crystalis

wordfather

i had a twisted dream this morning when my alarm tried to wake me up where jeff goldblum said 'Actually if you sleep a bit Longer you'll have More time to get ready It's called the Goldblum's Law and it works just go back to sleep' and i believed him and i overslept

orcboxer

it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,

unholypsychic

"Oh, boy! I just got two asks! Whatever could they be!" The humble inbox:

dogpuppy

galindatopland

no more jokes about taylor swift's lyrics or about gaylor when all that does is distract from the fact that when it is no longer lucrative to present yourself as a liberal "progressive" artist she has quickly moved on to marrying and befriending trump supporters. i do not care if there was anything gay between her and her ex bestie when her new bestie brittany mahomes is being personally thanked by donald trump. i think it's a shame that all discourse i see on this site about her right now is about whether it's ridiculous and stupid to think she's not straight. what we should be talking about is what it means when the biggest international pop star is getting engaged to a trump supporter during a time when we are seeing eugenics white supremacy ads. i don't care to hear about the eras tour unless it's about how dave portnoy (a trump supporter and alleged rapist) got a personal handwritten note from her at the eras tour. it does not matter if you think she's a crap lyricist or the best lyricist of our generation when what matters is what her choice to align herself with maga signifies about the culture