sophisticated with a hint of slutty

Chloe, 19, English university student :) I do theatre and Chinese and stuff....

[ashstfu]

when i say i need "a little snack," rest assured the snack will not be little

[littlebluerivers]

sorry not sorry that you hate yourself but let young girls do things that make them gain weight, get wrinkles, and have fun

[twinhearts]

🤣🤣🤣

[ralfmaximus]

No particular reason

[yifera]

Hey, I say let men in your life know when they are cute. Do it. I went to try new glasses with my boyfriend, and I noticed him going back to a pair he wouldn't usually go for and repeating "actually..." in a soft voice. So I asked him to show me. The glasses where round and thin and made his face look soft. He looked super cute. "Baby, you look fucking cute" i told him, because he did. He's had those glasses for the past week and from time to time I tell him he looks good and he lights up and says "I'm so fucking cute". He is. Men and masc folk are cute, and I want them to hear it more, earnestly, because it's great to see them be shy and giddy and soft and proud and even cuter about it. I don't think I need to justify myself more. Do it. Highly recommend. Godspeed.

[swingsetindecember]

me, putting a bunch of hand wash only things in the washing machine: you guys look out for each other in there OK

[zackisontumblr]

do you ever sabotage your own free time? like wtf is that about? i want to play this game or read or do something specific but instead i will just stare out the window or scroll mindlessly???

[funnytwittertweets]

[pirategf]

Dying at how with the heat going outside is treated as a whole adventure, it's all "have you been outside? it's hell out there" & "how is it outside?" & "i've just come outside." like brave souls bearing news from the outside world

[serotnin]

how come you only become aware of how tipsy you are in bathrooms

[serotnin]

[grapefruiters]

things could be worse. you could have school tomorrow.

[thicchighness]

Sex before marriage is a sin. Unless you do it doggystyle, cause all dogs go to heaven.

Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

[calamitys-child]

I truly am obsessed with how Knives Out was like. Hello Daniel Craig, man who has spent the past two decades of his career being alternately beaten up and objectified playing an action hero with no personality. Would you like to please put on a shirt and an incomprehensible vaguely Texan accent and flex your character acting dark comedy muscles as well as your pecs for a while. And he’s like BOY WOULD I and they made a work of art. Also love that they put Chris Evans in sweaters. Get your beefcakes then dress them nice make them soft and give them some bonkers character work to do it’s what cinema needs more of

[calamitys-child]

I love that several people have responded to this with “op I forgive you cause you’re Scottish but that’s not a Texan accent” which is fair thank you I appreciate it but no two people have agreed on what accent it is which is also Absolutely fair and hilarious as a reaction to this film

[calamitys-child]

Cannot stress enough that I do not know what the fuck a foghorn leghorn is but literally a hundred people have said it to me so far so I’m assuming it’s important to, like, Americans

[not100bees]

[marthajefferson]

“…why are you all sitting at one side of the table, huh?”

The Last Supper, Leonardo Da Vinci (c.1490) WATCHMEN, Zack Snyder (2009)  Inherent Vice, Paul Thomas Anderson (2014) The X-files (1993-2018) ALIEN: Covenant, Ridley Scott (2017) That'70s show (1998-2006)  M*A*S*H, Robert Altman (1970) Murder on the Orient Express, Kenneth Branagh (2017) Viridiana, Luis Buñuel (1961) The Simpsons (1989 —)

[prokopetz]

Trainability in cats is a funny thing.

My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.

That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:

There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street

Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position

One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it

It was raining

One of them saw a weird bug

[hollowedskin]

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.

[blenderweaselhasopinions]

Dogs really aren’t much better.  I teach all my dogs the command “show me”.  How it works is if the dog needs something but I’m having trouble understanding what exactly they’re trying to tell me, I say “show me” and they lead me to whatever the problem is.  Usually they lead me to a real problem (like a toy that got stuck under the couch, their water bowl is empty, etc).  But sometimes they want me to fix things like this-

They pulled the covers off my bed and now they want me to put the covers back

They put their ball on top of the ottoman but the ottoman won’t throw it for them

The cat is sleeping and won’t chase them

A flower fell off the potted plant

The cat is sitting in a box and they don’t like it

One of them lost their bandana

The cat won’t take the toy they’re trying to give her

The cat DID take the toy they gave her and now they want it back

[thouroghly-inconsequential]

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[solidsnake]

[cubonesaystransrights]

[thegingerpowers]