goodnight daylight @mutatedminds - Tumblr Blog

Today I turn 30. I wanted to write something to document it.

I am confused how 17 turned into 20 turned into 27 turned into 30. I'm waiting to feel my age but im not sure that will ever happen.

I feel many emotions.

I was sad yesterday but now I feel grateful.

I wonder how my 30s will be!

#birthday

My every 2 yr remember there was a time I had Tumblr post

I had a dream about him last night. I just woke up suddenly from it. I'm contemplating what to do. Just because I had a dream with him I shouldn't message him. But is it so wrong to? I am not sure what to do. It has been so long and I dont want to bombard but i also long to know how he is. I dont know what to do!!!!

I miss him though.

Constantly feel like i need vaildation in anything and like im not doing enough. Instead of appreciating a down day i worry about what im not doing or what i should be doing. Need to stop

selkiefem

any girl born after 1993 can’t cook… all they know is female hysteria, feral women eating berries imagery, cry on public transport listening to sufjan stevens, project too heavily onto a24 movies, eat hot chip and lie

Have a yearning to message mike but it's been so long and he's probably changed and doesn't care to talk to me. But i miss him so much and we vibed so well it sucks

I need to book an appt with the psychologist to get assessed for anxiety ocd and depression but i highkey dont want to know the results or cry in front of her again so i keep putting it off

I lost my car a couple of days ago in an accident and I literally just started crying because IM GOING TO MISS IT SO MUCH frick its so dumb but it was Mine

Very happy with my progress of mental health and physical health this yr. I feel good and like i am changing for the best!

I sat on the beach tonight and started harry potter 4 and felt happy

I need someone to teach me how to be genuinely happy for people instead of pretending im so happy!!! But secretly dying of jealousy

naprasno

i can say embarrassing things on here because y’all are not real

I had the psychologist appt today. And ive cried on and off about 50 times today and ive never felt more emotionally drained in my life. And I've also never had someone speak the truth so clearly and exactly what I needed to hear even if it hurt to hear. I have a lot of progress to do and I am so open to changing

#me

I booked the psychologist appt and it's next week and im anxious

I made a decorative sign for a mother who lost two twin stillbirth girls and tanya presented it to her at the graveside service and the mother cried when she saw it because she thought it was so beautiful and she was going to go home afterwards and hang it up. Makes me happy (but obviously sad) that one single item i personally made has had an impact on someone who needs it. Thats why i Love what i do

A recurring thought the last few wks: i want to move far away on my own and nvr look back and be different and a better me.

I feel empty lately. Like a void is not being filled within me. Keep thinking (not literally) but how it would be easier to just a. Be dead or b. Move the heck away and start again although both of these i know are very untrue. I feel like I'm not living my best life and it's only one shot we all have. I feel like im 12 years old, unknowing and have opinions of others, not my own. I dont know how to fix this. I am reliant on my parents opinions and thoughts because I trust their judgement the very most. I have a deep deep desire to make choices they think are right. Im re-reading harry potter right now and its the only time i dont feel overwhelmed (which i dont feel like i deserve to say that because I should not feel overwhelmed, i am incredibly fortunate in all aspects)

Sigh

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

goodnight daylight