The Ninth Doctor is the kind of person who will take you out for something to eat and say “my treat” but then he remembers that he actually has no money.

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The Ninth Doctor is the kind of person who will take you out for something to eat and say “my treat” but then he remembers that he actually has no money.
Manifesting a companion who dresses as batshit as the Doctor
dr who is so crazy imagine your species goes extinct except for two theater kids who call themselves The Orthodontist and the Administrator and they just go around causing problems and destroying your entire culture's reputation
doctor who heritage post
Doctor Who is about the human condition, it’s about silly outfits, it’s about the power ordinary people can wield, it’s about ridiculous haircuts, it’s about the abiding love for humanity, it’s about one alien weirdo and their jealous girlfriend of a time machine, it’s about helping the most vulnerable, it’s about christmas-cracker-level puns, it’s about protecting the innocent, it’s about a butch Australian lesbian flirting with her alien scientist roommate, it’s about how good will always triumph over evil, it’s about two platonic besties passing their shared brain cell back and forth, it’s about kindness and the intrinsic power of hope, it’s about a sapphic alien making heart-eyes whenever her bestie talks about reversing the polarity-
im literally never not thinking about the fruit stand guy from the scene where andrey was talking about "taking goncharov to his lake house" RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM with NO CONTEXT. he doesn't know theyre gangsters talking in innuendo but he also doesnt care. the real hero of the movie.
i'm so confused rn, can you explain the goncharov thing?? i get off tumblr for five minutes
(This post will be kept pinned & periodically updated until 28 Nov)
Lmaoooo
Nah I getchu. So this post has been circulating for like a year:
Link to post.
But yesterday, it had inspired someone to do this:
Link to post.
Next thing I knew there were fake Letterboxed reviews.
Goncharov moodboards. Really good ones.
Link to post.
Meta analysis. So many fake meta essays. Disturbingly good ones. And of course the memes. (Edit: HAVE I SAID THIS SHIT IS DISTURBING)
As you can see, the myth just started to grow, characters and ships and tropes being added one after the other, almost bizzarely without contradiction, until there was enough of shape to the whole thing for people to start posting fanfic about it on AO3. "No beta we die like ice-pick Joe" is already a tag.
Link to post.
It was hilarious in the beginning, but the way it's developed within less than a day, kind of like it's being willed into existence, is freaking me out a bit. We're toying with powers beyond our comprehension. 😂😂😂
Link to post.
Of course, there could be an ulterior motive as well.
Link to post (tags mine).
Edit: guys, please tag these posts "unreality" so people with disassociation issues can filter them out (not this one, this is an explainer). <3
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Edit 2: Aparently the boots in the original post are actually referring to a movie called Gomorrah that came out in 2008, directed by Mateo Garrone, based on the Scampia Feud. And other people had also been making posts about the fake movie for a while before the poster took off.
found by @thepotch
Edit 3: Explainer: why did those boots have this movie on them anyway?
Edit 4: Alt text added to all images courtesy of @valentineish ❤️
Edit 5: Turns out tumblr has done this kind of thing before. Nine years in this hell place and I had to have "Squiddles" and penis smp explained in the replies.
Edit 6: This post collects the Lore so far.
Edit 7: Lynda Carter (real one)/ earns more/ Tumblr cred.
Edit 8: Holy shit y'all we have the theme music. With sheet music. And it's on Spotify!
Edit 9: THERE IS A TRAILER WITH THE THEME MUSIC
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I made this post 18 hours after the movie poster went up. Closed edits 27 hours after first posting. So all of the above happened within 45 hours of the movie poster going up.
Edit 10: Google document live-compiling all the lore so far (Day 3)
Edit 11: Masterpost of Goncharov soundtracks (Day 3)
Edit 12: Entertainment news articles covering the Gonch-posting (real) (Contd from yday)
Edit 13: The music from the masterpost all compiled into a 31-minute original score with video edits on YouTube (edit: unfortunately taken down)
Edit 14: Staff's Goncharov art showcase for Tumblr Tuesday
As of closing on Day 3 there are 371 works in the AO3 tag.
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Updating with Day 3 shenanigans I missed yesterday:
Edit 15: Goncharov TV Tropes page
Edit 16: Ethics of Gonchposting
Important PSA 1 (how to reduce harm to Tumblr's neurodivergents)
Important PSA 2 (reality affirmation, anti-bullying)
Important PSA 3 (why you should stop trying to vandalise legit information sites)
Edit 17: Character lore from beezlebub whose poster they originated from
Edit 18: What we know about/ Director Matteo JWHJ0715 (#unreality)
Edit 19: Link to post with screenshotted and described NYT article (scroll down) and this golden exerpt from BuzzFeed: 💀
(alt text included)
End of Day 4 there are now 485 works in the Goncharov tag on AO3
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Didn't get to update this on Day 5, so these are the Day 5 doings:
More trailers!
Trailer 1 (My favourite)
Trailer 2
Trailer 3
Trailer 4
I also just found out about the Goncharov Game Jam.
It appears this opened a day after after the meme took off? It also says: "The deadline has been pushed back one week, to December 4, 2022, due to the US Thanksgiving holiday and greater-than-expected interest."
Goncharov was first entered into Wikipedia between Day 4 and 5 (attempts to vandalise it with fake info don't count, incidentally – please knock that shit off) under List of Internet Phenomena. This was then expanded into its own Wikipedia page at the end of Day 5 because, according to the talk history: "the topic now meets the notability threshold for its own artice due to significant coverage in The New York Times and other sources cited." We're on Wikipedia, people!
And then we made The Guardian half a day later. So while the meme is definitely dying down to embers by now, it still stays winning.
YouTube channels with episodes on the meme:
InformOverlord (4:30)
Lessons in Meme Culture (2:43)
End of Day of 5 there were 511 works on AO3, and End of Day 6 (today) there are 556.
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🚨BREAKING 🚨 from Martin Scorsese's daughter's TikTok (real actual):
We did it you guys!
book quotes that i will never recover from
"he is half of my soul, as the poets say. " - song of achilles
"write me a letter telling me how to live the rest of my life without you." - how to make friends with the dark
"they were my birthday presents." - shatter me
"she had realized that she had forgotten the precise blue of his eyes and the depth of his laugh." - clockwork princess
"my name is sam cortland... and i will not be afraid." - assassin's blade
"you chose me four years ago. would you choose me still?" - these violent delights
"we were all supposed to make it." - crooked kingdom
"i remember everything." - the invisible life of addie larue
"come home and shout at me. come home and fight with me. come home and break my heart, if you must. just come home." - cruel prince
"i wasted all those yesterdays and am completely out of tomorrows." - they both die at the end
"you hated the idea of me." - the final gambit
"bob says hello." - house of hades
"abuse can feel like love. starving people will eat anything." - nightfall
"i missed you only with an ocean between us. but if death was separating us... i would find you." - queen of shadows
"i loved him. i love him. as best i could." - we were liars
"i'm the villain, even in my own story. but you were supposed to play a different role." - finale
"i will find you again in the next world—the next life. and we will have that time. i promise." - a court of wings and ruin
"i spent half of my time loving her and the other half hiding how much i loved her." - the seven husbands of evelyn hugo
gorgeous shots by cepaigephoto on ig
what i thought the master had planned with the forced regeneration. alas
virgin russell t davies:
chad chibs:
guys its working keep posting cringe we really can keep them out
Apollo @one-time-i-dreamt
I'm willing to bet that the idea to include the song Rasputin came first and then they had to figure out a way to make it make sense and that's why the Master disguised himself as him for absolutely no reason at all
always funny when someone complains about the special effects on dr who like Sir This Is The Bad Special Effects Show
i know it's been said before but. i'm rewatching christopher eccleston's doctor and i forgot how REAL this show used to be. rose seeing aliens and being totally overwhelmed and having to leave the room. her mum actually being present and wondering what this random 40 YEAR OLD (LOOKING) MAN wants with her teenage daughter. the doctor actually sometimes being the one who makes mistakes. i feel like so much humanity got lost somewhere along the way.
So my friends and I are in the middle of watching the 5th doctor's era, and after watching POTD the other day and then watching Enlightenment (the episode after Nyssa leaves) today, I'm just struck by the tragedy of it all, of the sheer suffering Tegan went through - which, while not as cosmically awful as having your memory erased or getting trapped in a parallel universe etc, was nonetheless far too real and relentless.
So Tegan has possibly one of the most traumatic intro episodes. Unlike the overwhelming majority of companions, she doesn't choose to join the doctor. She enters the TARDIS while looking for help when her aunt's car broke down on the side of the road on the way to her new job, and since the TARDIS was parked around the Master's TARDIS due to the latter's trickery. The Master uses his tissue compression eliminator to kill Tegan's aunt, and Tegan gets lost in the seemingly endless labyrinth within the TARDIS, and when the Fourth Doctor and Adric return to the ship they take off with her still inside it.
She didn't want to leave Earth, and she spends the next few episodes begging the Doctor to take her back. In these episodes, she witnesses the Master destroy a quarter of the universe, watches the Doctor die and regenerate and is forced to look after him with Nyssa while Adric is kidnapped by the Master and the TARDIS travels back to the Big Bang and is almost destroyed. She carries the Doctor's recovering form through the jungle of a planet meant to be a sanctuary, only for it to be another of the Master's trap which they barely escape. She has to deal with Adric, and spends her first trip to a space ship trying to get back to the TARDIS so that she can get away from it all, and has to be rescued by the Doctor when this backfires. On the world of the Kinda she is possessed by the manipulative Mara and trapped inside her mind, an experience which would stick with her even after the Doctor saved her. She finally catches a bit of a break when they visit Earth in the past and have a relatively breezy adventure stopping Terileptils from trying to take over the planet (though they do inadvertently end up burning down London), and in the next episode she's decided that she doesn't want the Doctor to take her home anymore.
Black Orchid is a defining episode for the 5th Doctor's era. It is a light hearted romp and pure historical in the midst of tense action packed sci fi stories. Tegan eagerly watches the Doctor play cricket, orients Nyssa and Adric to Earth in the 1920s, and thoroughly enjoys her time at the costume party the TARDIS team is invited to at the local estate. Then it turns out a man who stole the Doctor's costume has kidnapped one of their hosts (who happens to be a doppelganger of Nyssa), the Doctor is arrested and Tegan and the others arrested as accomplices, and then Nyssa gets taken to the roof of the building as it burns and Tegan watches as her captor almost drops Nyssa off the roof and then falls to his death. They attend the funeral, and then head off again in the TARDIS.
And then we get to Earthshock. In the time leading up to this episode, the TARDIS team have become somewhat of a dysfunctional family. Though Tegan did not choose to join them on the TARDIS, she grows close to them all, especially Nyssa, sharing a room with her and bonding over their struggles with the new Doctor. Though she finds Adric annoying, she still cares about him deeply and bickers with him like one might a sibling. And she trusts the Doctor, though barely and with little respect, to get them safely from one destination to the next. Then in Earthshock Adric wants to leave, and Tegan doesn't get in the middle of him and the Doctor fighting, but they all quickly get distracted by the Cybermen plot they arrive in the midst of, and soon are all held hostage on a space ship headed to Earth with a cargo of Cybermen. The Doctor outwits them and they all end up back on the TARDIS except Adric, who is attempting to stop the ship crashing into Earth from the control room. While the Doctor fights a Cyberman inside the TARDIS, blaster fire damages both the TARDIS console and the controls Adric is working on, and so the Doctor, Tegan and Nyssa watch helplessly on the TARDIS scanner as the ship crashes into the Earth with Adric still inside. Tegan and Nyssa beg the Doctor to go back in time, to rescue him, but there's nothing any of them can do. Adric is dead - the only long term companion to die and stay dead while travelling with the Doctor.
Everything goes downhill from here. Tegan never quite recovers her trust in the Doctor after this. Immediately following Adric's death the grieving team arrives at Heathrow Airport, the work Tegan's been wearing her uniform for and trying to get to this whole time, and get dragged into yet another plot by the Master, one which involves them seeing a hallucination of Adric. And then they defeat the Master and Tegan gets to have a brief tour of Heathrow Airport before making it back to the TARDIS just in time for it to leave... without her.
Still reeling from everything she'd been through, Tegan nonetheless tries to work her air hostess job, but isn't able to cut it. After losing the job and trying to figure out her place back on Earth she decides to visit her favourite cousin who's on holiday in Amsterdam and arrives to find him having gone missing in a mysterious crypt. She tries to find him and gets kidnapped by Omega, a time lord and enemy of the Doctor, and used as a hostage against him (again). Even after that experience, once Omega is defeated Tegan is eager to rejoin the TARDIS team, to Nyssa's joy and delight.
The Mara resurfaces and Tegan relives her nightmares. A questionable new companion, the alien Turlough, joins the TARDIS and Tegan watches him warily, sure he's up to no good. On one particular day where Nyssa and Tegan are happily chatting together while Nyssa works on an experiment in their room, a portal opens up in their room and Nyssa gets drawn into it and ends up lost and sick on a leper colony ship. Tegan follows and gets lost in the ventilation system with Turlough. At the end of the adventure, after Nyssa has found a cure and the Doctor has stopped the space ship from exploding and ending the universe, Tegan is reunited with Nyssa only to receive the news that she's not coming back with them, she's staying on the ship to reform their healthcare system.
"She'll die here!" Tegan urges the Doctor to attempt to change Nyssa's mind but she will not be shaken.
"Not easily Tegan," Nyssa said, on the brink of tears. "Like you, I'm indestructable."
The two embrace and I honestly think Tegan never recovers from losing her. I believe Tegan would've stayed with her if she'd felt more confident with space and space travel, and she probably regretted not opting to stay behind many times going forward.
In the first episode after losing Nyssa the Doctor initially tries to get Tegan to remain in the TARDIS, in safety, but an Eternal takes an interest in her and she gets thrust into their games. She doesn't get a break, a moment to her herself to grieve, and instead has the Eternals violate her mind, recreating her and Nyssa's bedroom on their ship and keeping a close eye on her, using her for entertainment. The Doctor can't, or doesn't, do anything to protect her.
Now Tegan and Turlough do get along, but I don't think Tegan's heart is in it for the rest of her adventures with the Doctor. She travels with him because she has nothing else left, she's lost her aunt, her job, her closest friends. It's really quite tragic, especially considering that she's one of the longest lasting companions alongside Jamie, Clara and Yaz.
Having already suffered at the hands of the Master and the Cybermen, Tegan encounters the Daleks on Earth and sustains an injury that wipes her out for most of the adventure. She and the soldier nursing her spend most of the time hiding from daleks and trying not to get killed. Once the Daleks are defeated and Tegan rejoins the Doctor and Turlough at the TARDIS, she tells him that she's not coming with him, because she's seen too much death and travelling isn't fun anymore.
She seems to have said this in the moment, maybe out of desperation or in the hope that the Doctor would offer some comfort or promise of safety as opposed to the blank and broken stare of a man who had lost so much. So she leaves, but changes her mind at the last minute, running to the TARDIS just as it disappears for good. And that's the last she sees of him for almost forty years.
Until Power of the Doctor, when the Doctor walks in and barely even acknowledges her. Though I doubt she wants to travel with her again, she still never really got closure. She didn't choose to join the TARDIS and she was basically forced to leave, and then in the years after she would've heard of all the times the Doctor was back on Earth, and after she joined UNIT would've learnt of all the different incarnations and companions he'd had, yet she never came back to see her, after everything they'd shared, suffered together. She was convinced the Doctor didn't even care about her, and though she'd tried to live her life in a way that helped people, it had brought her right to this very spot, a fight with Cybermen, Daleks and the Master and a Doctor who barely looked at her and didn't ask her into the TARDIS. No wonder Tegan is so angry throughout that episode!
I don't even have a point to this I guess I just am thinking about her, and how Tegan deserved better, but I'm so glad she got her moment with the hologram doctor, an acknowledgement of everything they'd been to, and she got a place to discuss her trauma at the end with the Doctor support group. Also I don't care what Chibnall says, Tegan is NOT alone, her wife Nyssa is just busy at a space science conference and will be back soon to bitch about the Doctor.
matty healy's unverified twitter account is the most unhinged place on twitter