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HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!!
Friendly reminder that OCD isnβt just an βI like things clean and neatβ quirk. It actually makes you question everything, including but not limited to if youβre actually a good person because of your intrusive thoughts, to the point where you wonder if you should just kill yourself. It also makes you obsess over other peopleβs opinions and thoughts of you, because god forbid they think youβre actually a sick freak who liked what happened or think you want to act on these thoughts your brain is constantly trying to convince you that you like.
Also, god forbid you tell someone intrusive thoughts arenβt dyeing your hair at 3 am and are instead thoughts of *insert something taboo here*, cuz then they look at you like you want to act on these thoughts, and it makes you wonder if you really do despite how much it makes you want to hurt yourself just thinking about it.
gentleness and love and recognition wash over me so often when i hear about someoneβs ocd themes, because it says so much about them but never what theyβre afraid it will.
oh you get intrusive thoughts about hurting yourself so bad you die? you must love life very very much and what a beautiful thing that is to do.
oh you get obsessive thought spirals about not actually being a lesbian? how special it is to have an queer identity be so integral and important to you.
oh you get these horrible intrusive thoughts about hurting kids and being predatory? we need more people who care about kidsβ safety in this world, what a wonderful thing it is to care so much. it Is scary out there but you are not the one to be afraid of.
oh you think you have to do a bunch of superstitious rituals so your family doesnβt die? they must mean so much to you and how terrifying the thought of living without them must be.
you can see the lines of peopleβs hearts in their fears, especially the ones that manifest into living breathing things inside of us. fears that sit in us like a record skipping over and over again. it is a beautiful thing to care so much, but you were never one to be worried about, you wonβt lose the things you love so much simply because you love them too much and are afraid you will. thatβs not how anything works. x
(person who suspects they have ocd voice): what if every time i think something is an ocd symptom im actually faking it and stereotyping and ruining the lives of people with real ocd and im a terrible person
I got formally diagnosed with OCD a month ago by my psych (it has been life changing in a positive way), but as I learn more about the disorder and how OCD affects me and has done in the past and gain more awareness, I then spiral with this exact above thought.
I was also late diagnosed with autism (formally diagnosed level 1/formally known as Aspergerβs), informally ADHD by my mental health team and my autism service who are very sure I have a combination of both ASD&ADHD (I and they accommodate for myself as such) but still waiting formal ADHD diagnosis and support from ADHD service after 3 and a half years on waiting list! and also got diagnosed with PTSD, with a previous dx of EUPD written off. During the process of this over the past few years, I had a very unsupportive partner a couple years ago (whoβs misjudgement of my difficulties, constant picking at my character and many other things they said and did to me has actually left me with several OCD themes to deal with still now) and my mother who made many negative comments about my late ASD&ADHD dx and also was very unsupportive, they left me for the last 3 years struggling to fully accept my ASD&ADHD (and to manage the process of unmasking), now since being diagnosed with OCD on top of the other 3 dx Iβm struggling with this again, stuck in a cycle of thinking pretty much same as the above post, and what if Iβm just a bad person etc. I get stuck in such a thought spiral. I can identify where these obsessive thoughts come from given the negative input from those people has manifested into many different themes, not just questioning my diagnosed disorders. Thereβs so much I could say, but the irony of one of my OCD obsessions is questioning if I really do have OCD. When I sit back and see how thatβs come to be, I realise how important how we treat others and what we say to them is, how much it can do to a person.
Thankful to finally be getting the right support, from professionals, and my darling husband. to be gaining awareness, knowledge, wisdom. On the road to recovery and much better management of my mental health/neurodivergence, even just from knowing whatβs actually going on so much makes sense now.
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