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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
trying on a metaphor
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Janaina Medeiros
hello vonnie
todays bird

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Cosimo Galluzzi
taylor price

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Discoholic 🪩
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
macklin celebrini has autism
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Sweet Seals For You, Always
will byers stan first human second
RMH

Origami Around

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Albania
seen from Singapore

seen from Türkiye
seen from Chile

seen from Venezuela

seen from United States

seen from United Arab Emirates
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@my-only-aesthetic
If you are back at school, college, university or work soon.
Don’t panic. Get prepared and sort your things out.
Take some deep breaths.
You got this, you cutie.
I should just date my own asshole, at least it will actually apologize.
Someone: *is late*
Me: Were we supposed to meet at this time? Is this really the place we were going to meet up? Is it actually Thursday today? Were we even meeting at Thursday? Do I actually know this person? Do they really exist? Do I exist?
I saw the devil in everything around me. I never thought to look in the mirror.
taking-back-my-life (via wordsnquotes)
The Civil War Trailer
Steve Rogers: (ง'̀-'́)ง
Sam Wilson: Look man, I know this is important but please think about it before trying to fight like, everyone
Steve Rogers: (ง'̀-'́)ง
Sam Wilson : *sigh*
Sam Wilson: (ง'̀-'́)ง
your golden retriever has evolved into an emerald retriever
it’s the shiny version of the golden retriever
no offense but the cutest thing to me is random little kisses like not even, on the lips just, when someone kisses you on the temple or like?? the top of your head or anywhere honestly its just rlly cute and I’m suffering
I’m sleepy and I wish I was kissing you.
Today, I fucked up by calling a locksmith when I was "locked out" of my car.
I’ll preface this by saying I’m usually not a stupid man but I was at the end of my third 16 hour shift in a row and I was very tired. I’ll make this quick:
I got off work, went out to my car, hit the button for the doors on my remote unlocker – as usual. Nothing happened. I tried it a few more times, battery must be dead. I stand there for 10 minutes, mashing the little button, hoping for enough juice to open the doors. Nada.
I call a locksmith, explain that I’m locked out of my car. He says he’ll be right over. 20 minutes later he arrives. He walks up with his tools, inserts a thing that looks like a blood pressure cuff in the door jamb. He starts making conversation as it inflates, pushing the door open:
‘So locked your keys in the car? No problem sir, I’ll have it open in a minute.’
‘No, my keys are right here, my key fob is dead,’ I replied.
He stops and for about 10 seconds doesn’t say a word. He sees my keys in my hands. Takes them from me, inserts them in the lock and opens the door.
I was mortified. I was so in a habit of opening the doors with my remote fob that I entirely forgot that keys could be used to unlock cars manually. He started laughing so hard I thought he was going to have an aneurysm. After he stopped laughing, he told me there was no charge. The story he’d have to tell was worth the drive out.
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