MyBigBadBrain

[mybigbadbrain-blog]

[mybigbadbrain-blog]

Lacking on the drive

I started off at my new job with zeal ans enthusiasm. My courage faltered after 2 weeks but I continued. And then later, I settled. I settled into the office life. I made myself like the pressure. I made myself accustomed to working at a place with no women whatsoever. This continued for 5 months. And then BAM, I broke down. It is said that a person can not carry on an act for too long. Especially when it is against their nature. Now I need to submit my resignation and all I can think about is whether I will find a new job. Even above that, there is another nagging thought. This thought tells me that I am a failure if I give up to the pressure, If I give up to the negativity, If I give up to the male dominance that is viral at my work place. I have two days to gather the guts to get rid of this job. I have two days to decide if this job is worth it. And all I am wondering is whether I am a loser for going ahead with it.

[mybigbadbrain-blog]

What happens next?

The world is constantly whirring around and there is so so much on my mind. I wonder what is the average capacity for a human brain regarding the number of thoughts it can hold. Or not forget. Or think about. Or forget maybe. For the greater good. And then to find the peace amid the hurricane of thoughts. To find your way, the right way, the right train of thought is altogether another art that I have yet not mastered. Your thoughts maybe?

[mybigbadbrain-blog]

Caution: I am beginning to write

Of all the feelings that I have felt in the longest of whiles, I have never felt this feeling of missing out on something that is crying out for me to notice it. I do not know what it is but it makes me cry myself to bed most nights. It makes me wonder about my existence and worry if I am doing things the right way. It makes me calculate each step that I plan to take. It makes me wonder what I am really made of. How can a person be so sure of himself yet so unsure?