- “A million dollars, but… every time you fart, you need to stop, waft it into your own face, and smell it for like four seconds. No matter what you’re doing.”
- “You get a million dollars, right? But every time you cut yourself, all of your blood comes out. Except you don’t die and all the blood you lost regenerates in one second.”
- “You get a million dollars. Do whatever you want with it, spend it how you’d like, but… for the rest of your life, every time you sneeze, you teleport somewhere in the world.”
- “How about this? You get half a million dollars, but every time [name] jizzes, it ends up in your mom’s stomach.”
- “You could have sex with any woman or man that you want to for six months, and then never have sex again for the rest of your life. Or… just have your normal life. And, you know, have sex once a year like you normally do. What would you rather do?”
- “What if you were the hottest dude in the world and every chick wanted to bang you, right? But your jizz would smell so bad that they automatically vomited?”
- “You get a million dollars, but every time you get dressed, there’s a one in twenty chance that everything you’re wearing will disappear at random.”
- “For a million dollars, you give birth to a miniature version of yourself, and it’s like this itty bitty baby of you, and it goes through its full life cycle in two days, and then it dies.”
- “How much would I have to pay you to eat human poop?”
- “You get a million dollars, but once a month for a year, you have to go out on a nice date with Hitler.”
- “Would you wipe someone’s ass for two million dollars?”
- “You get a million dollars, but every time you saw someone attractive, you vomit just a little bit.”
- “A million dollars, but for one year, everywhere you go, you are pushed in a baby stroller by an incredibly strong, muscular man wearing like a tiny muscle-shower outfit.”
- “Not only do you get a million dollars, but you also can go to any movie you want for free. But through the duration of the film, spaghetti is constantly flowing out your mouth.”
- “Alright. You get a million dollars, but for the rest of your life, every time you hear the happy birthday song, you have to go over to the place it’s being sung and eat the entire cake.”
- “You get a million dollars, but every year on your birthday, the moment you turn whatever age, you get warped back in time and you have to watch your parents conceive you. From a different angle each year.”
- “Ten million dollars, your head has a foreskin. Would you take it?”
- “You get a million bucks, but for the rest of your life, every time you climax, nothing comes out… until an hour later.”
- “What would you rather have, a chicken that barks or a dog that clucks?”
- “You get a million dollars, but for the rest of your life, your dick glows all the time. Like, at the level of a 250-watt bulb.”