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@mylonelylife135
MASTERLIST
'My Pathetic Family'
In order:
Preview!
The first.
Vigilantes.
Not a funny joke.
Mini chapter: Little Girl
You're still here. Yet, another one arrives. (April 22nd, hopefully.)
Relevant information to 'My Pathetic Family'
Decisions, polls, a darker centered story and relationship status!
Art from author!
Coming soon... (I give up on trying to draw toddler reader guys I can't-)
The poll has ended.
The majority of you have chosen to keep your guard up. With having someone you can't recognize as a father and an adopted brother that's only hurt you, I don't blame you.
But who do you really have? Who will guide you when you are lost? When bitterness has started to creep into you? You can't possibly believe that Alfred is all you need, do you?
I suppose it's better than getting hurt again.
.
.
.
Notes:
-Building meaningful relationships may be harder now if only one side is trying.
-This will result in more complicated relationships...
######.
Bruce Wayne: ???
Alfred Pennyworth: ???
Richard Grayson: It's better to lie than tell the truth. Telling the truth would only get you hurt.
Barbara Gordon: ???
PS: I got sick after posting chapter 4 and feel like I'm not fully conscious, coincidence? I think not!
When you encounter someone new, how will you approach her? *Important to how YOU will end up approaching the others when they arrive.* Remember, suffering is pain. Do you consider apathy better than not to love at all? Choose what you wholeheartedly believe in and live with your choice.
Avoid her, what if she hurts you too?
Interact with her, she seems kind.
Give her a gift, open your heart to another.
Keep your guard up, you don't want another accident.
My Pathetic Family
You're still here. Yet, another one arrives.
.
.
.
Most people don't remember their early years of life.
When you asked Alfred about his childhood, he admitted that he didn't remember much of his very early years.
You?
You remember hearing distant footsteps pass your door at night. Heavy like steel, yet familiar.
You remember what it felt like when your brother kicked you in the face.
You witnessed with your own eyes how the man you came to know as the Joker smashed a reporter's head into paste on live television.
You remember everything.
You couldn't get it out of your head, You couldn't stop seeing that poor man's face before his face was smashed in. You couldn't stop hearing that noise. You couldn't stop thinking of that Man's face. You could still remember how cold the remote felt under your fingertips as you hastily tried to shut the TV off. The urge to curl in on yourself and cry like you've done before.
It made you want to puke.
Your only comfort was your new hobbies and Alfred himself.
Even then, drawing now felt tainted.
And everything in your room was starting to feel wrong, too.
.
.
.
People's opinions were subject to change.
Of course, Change was inevitable. Alfred knew that.
He could understand no longer liking something, but this?
This didn't feel good.
---
"What? Master (____), all of it? but all these are important to you; surely you don't mean that-"
"I'm just worried, this is all so sudden-"
"Of course I care for you-"
"...Alright, (____). I'll throw it away."
---
Alfred gazed solemnly at the boxes full of toys, clothes, bedsheets, notebooks, and tea set; why did (____) want all of this thrown away? Like it was trash to leave out in the rain?
You were swaddled in some of these blankets, slept with those stuffed animals, and learned to write your name in these books.
He was there for all of it. Maybe he was too sentimental, maybe he was holding onto stuff that would inevitably change, but he didn't care.
All of these meant memories.
Memories from when it was just you and him. He remembered every tea party he was forced to partake in, every stuffed plushie he purchased for you that brought such a joyful expression to your face, every colorful book he read to you while you laid in his lap and eventually fell asleep. Every single item in his hands is precious to him; he knows it's still precious to you, too.
For once, Alfred couldn't help but disobey you and hide the boxes of your belongings in the attic.
Maybe some day you would come to cherish them once more.
.
.
.
While you and Alfred were cleaning one of the many, many unused rooms in the manor, he couldn't help but notice your gaze drifting to the TV.
You were trying to hide your attention slowly turning towards the TV than cleaning; it didn't stop Alfred from noticing, though.
"(____), you're not wiping the drawer properly." He chuckled amused, reaching down to ruffle your hair.
"Mhm." You still weren't listening, hand raised to wipe at the thin air with your head turned.
Alfred shifted his gaze to see what caught your attention, eyebrows raising slightly to see what was captivating you.
It was a movie that had started on the kids channel you watched often, featuring a little ballerina struggling to find her confidence.
Alfred's eyes softened, putting the cloth down in a small bucket of sanitizer in favor of picking you up instead; A habit he had developed when it came to you. You liked that it was only reserved for you.
"Do you like them, (____)? The ballerinas?" Another question he knew the answer to, but Alfred could see that cheeky smile when you wanted to ramble.
"Yes, I like them. I like how high they jump, they're very pw-pretty. I want to be like them!" You exclaimed excitedly, putting your tiny hands on Alfred's shoulders for support.
"Is that so? would you like to attend some classes with some other kids your age-" Alfred stopped, noting how you stiffened in his grasp.
"... I'll ask your father if I can hire a private ballet instructor." Alfred could feel his heart melt a little when you let out a soft sigh of relief and snuggled closer into his arms.
"Thank you, Alfy." You murmured, pushing you face into his neck as he rubbed your back gently.
.
.
.
It had taken three days for you to have gotten a private ballet instructor.
You did have to go outside, though. It wasn't all bad, Alfred drove you to the private instructor's dance studio.
It was only supposed to be for two hours today. Your dad did pay for the private instructor's time but made it clear that it was only two times a week, 2 hours a day on the weekends.
It was better than nothing, you think.
You were looking out the window; watching as Alfred drove by houses, people walking their dogs, and people going out on an early morning jog.
A yawn escaped you. The classes you were going to attend were too early, especially for you. The sunrise had barely started yet!
"Alfy, it's too early for ballet." You whined, looking towards Alfred from the back passenger's seat.
Alfred gave you a glance through the rear view mirror, adjusting it for a moment. "I'm sorry, Master (____). I am required to bring you to your classes early because this is a schedule your father and the instructor have agreed upon. This is also a time that I have agreed upon because I will be very busy from now on."
"... You're not going to be there?" You asked quietly, your hands fiddling with the backpack that held your tutu, small ballet shoes, and the equipment ballerina's put on their feet as you sat in the back of the car with your seat belt on.
"I'm afraid not, Master (____). Your father has requested that I watch over Master Dick." Alfred explains, his hands steady on the steering wheel as he took a right turn.
Right, he did get in trouble for something a while back. You don't know what, but it was bad enough that he was forbidden from being Robin for the time being.
All you could do was nod sleepily, looking out the window at the passing buildings and cars driving about.
You hadn't been down these streets before. It was a part of Gotham that was made for the wealthy, but not super wealthy like your father.
It was upper middle class, you think. You weren't sure if Gotham even HAD a middle class here with all the crime.
"We're here, Master (____)," Alfred said, snapping you out of your thoughts.
You looked out the window of the car, and there was a small building on your left side. It was painted white with touches of pink with a cursive sign that read, 'Melody's ballet studio!'
You had to look away.
Alfred parked by the sidewalk, opening the car door for you as you stepped out with the small purple bag over your shoulders.
"I must warn you of something (____) before I leave," Alfred admitted, his hand gently clasping your shoulders as you gazed up at him in confusion. "I am going to have to pick you up from now on with Master Dick present. Your father doesn't want your brother to be alone in the manor for too long and..." he trailed off before letting out a heavy sigh.
You stiffened slightly, your hands hugging your bag closer to yourself before responding meekly, "It's okay. I-I'm not scared of him anymore."
You weren't keen on seeing Richard and still avoided him. But even then, it's not like you got to see him often when he's out being Robin fighting crime at night and gone during the day.
Dick was up around 8 AM for breakfast, you were drawing or reading through a book Alfred has been helping you read for the hour by yourself in your bedroom or the living room, you had lunch with Alfred by 11 AM, Dick was already gone by 9 AM after being driven to school by Alfred. By the time he came back, you were usually in your room. Usually, he would go to sleep or something, then wake up for his patrols with your dad and fight crime.
It was routine not to see him, but you did pay attention to his schedule for a while for when it was okay to come out of your room.
Alfred didn't respond, instead ruffling your hair as you whined before leading you towards the doors of the dance studio.
It took only a couple of moments before a woman approached the door and opened it, a warm smile on her face, "Hello, I'm Melody. I'm assuming that you're the one who arranged to have an entire studio for this little girl?" She questioned, her voice soft as she regarded Alfred, sending a smile your way momentarily before she started talking with Alfred.
You stopped listening briefly as you and Alfred entered the dance studio. It was a decent sized studio with mirrors, double poles, polished wooden tile flooring, and even a portable stereo speaker.
"-So she'll just be learning the basics today, nothing too difficult or strenuous on her body." You tuned back into the conversation, glancing between the ginger haired woman and Alfred.
They were engrossed in the conversation they were having, Alfred's hand still on your shoulder as he communicated with the woman.
"You don't have to worry about a thing, sir. (____) here will have lots of fun today." Sje reassured, glancing downwards towards you and sending you another smile.
You peered up into her eyes, and you could see her smile falter slightly. Alfred didn't seem to notice as he closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh. "I will be leaving now (____)," his hand let go of your shoulder, "I'll be back at nine. Have fun."
Alfred gave you a kiss on the forehead before he left the studio, your eyes trailing after his form as he left.
"Hello, (____). Your father told me a lot about you." Melody said warmly, kneeling down to meet your eyes.
"Do you not like being near other children?" She questioned, a quizzical look on her face as if she was trying to figure you out.
"N-No, I don't." You admittedly softly, shaking your head, gazing down at the tiled flooring.
She frowned slightly, a contemplative expression on her face before nodding, "Okay, I understand. Do you have a uniform on you? I'm sure I have some spare uniforms your size if you need any." Melody offered, her hand outstretched towards you.
"That's okay, I have my uniform." You murmured softly, letting your bag fall off your shoulders and unzipped it; revealing the navy blue uniform inside. "Can you show me where the bathroom is?
"Of course, sweetie." Melody chirped happily, leading you down a hallway.
Once led to the bathroom, you quickly entered; shutting the door and locking it.
You put your bag down, took your uniform and ballet shoes out of the bag, and changed into your ballet uniform.
It was easy changing into the ballerina outfit, Alfred had showed you yesterday how to put on the uniform. Putting on the toe spacers, padding, and pads were easy.
"Put the toe padding over the big toe, the toe spacer between the big toe and second toe, the pad over all your toes..." You recited to yourself slowly, your hands grabbing the ballet shoes and slipping them on.
You held both ribbons for one shoe, slowly tying it around your ankle.
"Up, around the ankle, wrap and tie into a knot..."
Getting up from the floor, you washed your hand in the sink and grabbed your bag now stuffed with the clothes and shoes you wore prior and left the bathroom.
Melody was waiting in the hallway, leaning slightly against the wall before noticing your presence and sending a smile your way.
"You look like a little ballerina already. Come with me."
You followed Melody once more back to where you were before, trailing behind the woman as she ushered you towards the ballet double polls.
It was amusing to see the woman power walk to the stereo speaker, kneeling down and pressing the power button and selecting a song to play.
Coming back to you; her hands gripped the pole bars while you stood behind smaller ones.
"Today we are starting with the basics. (____), I want you to look at what I'm doing with my feet and repeat after me, okay?" You nodded, mirroring your instructor's actions and holding onto the shorter bars in front of you; getting into position with both your feet slightly outwards and parallel as she asked.
"Alright, watch closely. Bend your feet, go onto your tippy toes, hold for five seconds! Anddd relax." You observed with curioisity as Melody bent her feet upwards and goes onto her tippy toes; holding the position for a couple of seconds before her feet went flat on the flooring.
"Stretch your left arm to your right as much as you can! Then stretch your right to your left!" Melody leaned her body as she performed her exercise; taking a deep breath and looking down at you, "Any questions?"
You fiddled with your hands awkwardly, "I-Is it only stretching today for these two hours? Nothing else?" You inquired, watching anxiously as Melody's posture switched from carefree to a more professional one. "Ah, that. You aren't the first to ask, (____). Yes, today will only be stretches. I know it's not fun, but because you're a beginner, we need to improve your flexibility first. If I tried to teach you the more impressive stuff right away, you might get hurt trying to replicate what I do. I don't want that, and I don't think you want that, either." Melody explained gently,
You nodded in understanding, it wouldn't be good if you did get injured to first class. You couldn't imagine how Alfred would react if you hurt yourself when he trusted you with a stranger.
"Now, let's start! I'll be doing the stretches with you, so don't be afraid to ask questions or ask for help." She spoke nonchalantly, getting back into position.
You bent your feet as she showed, getting up onto your toes shakily.
You struggled to hold the position for long; grabbing onto the pole bars hastily to stop yourself from falling.
Melody noticed; a giggle escaping her, "See? It's not easy, but that's okay. You're here to learn, not do everything perfectly. Now, stretch your arms!"
It was easier stretching your arms; holding the position then switching to the other side.
Holding your balance, though?
"This hurts..." You whined, feet shaking as you struggled to hold the position; momentarily letting go of the car only to grab it after almost falling over.
"It does, I assume you have the proper padding for your feet? Even then, it's still hurts, even for me." She chuckled lightly, holding the position and stretching her arm.
No matter how many times you tried, you couldn't keep your stance like Melody for more than 5 seconds without needing to grab the bar.
It was frustrating, but Alfred did say that ballet wasn't easy and to believe in yourself; so you kept going.
You kept going until you couldn't feel your arms, couldn't feel your toes or your feet; it didn't take long for Melody to notice.
"(____), dear. We can take a break. You look like a ghost." She uttered concerned, noticing the exhaustion written on your face and trembling limbs.
"I don't wanna..." you complained, yet sat back down, you were absolutely kaput.
Maybe Alfred was right about telling you to get into more athletic activities, your stamina sucks...
Melody stared with a contemplating look before nodding, walking off towards a closet.
"... How about I show you some ballet moves for oir next class, then? When you're ready to." She called out, grabbing a chair and putting it down, urging you to sit.
Once sat down, she began to stretch her foot alone the floor until her leg was extended while you watched quietly. "'Tendu' is keeping your foot on the floor while extending your leg, what you did today was 'Dégagé', keeping your toes halfway off the floor by lifting them and 'Relevé', which is standing up onto the pointe of your ballet shoes, tje one you were have difficulty with."
Melody paused. She must have seen your expression shift, glancing at you briefly before continuing. "Despite that, though, you did very good today! You kept trying. Not every kid who comes here does that. You got better quickly, too. You just need to take it easy and relax. You won't get it the first try, (____), and that's okay."
"Now, here's some of what I learned throughout my years as a ballerina!" Melody spoke enthusiastically and jumped on one foot to the other; twirling in a circle as you watched in awe, she was going very fast!
It wasn't the extravagant stuff you saw other ballerina's do in movies, but it was still everything you wanted to learn and more; to move with grace, feel as carefree as Melody looked and smile as brightly as she did.
She was dazzling, and you wanted to be just like her.
.
.
.
"Here you go, (____). You were great today!" You blinked as a lollipop was outstretched to you, reaching out and taking it with a shy smile. "T-Thank you." You murmured softly, shoving the lollipop into your pocket for later.
Once the ballet session with your instructor was over, you patiently waited outside the entrance with Melody by your side.
"I know you might have thought of today as boring, but, but! You're able to concentrate on the task at hand and even surprised me! You have talent. You just need to believe in yourself." Melody chirped enthusiastically; zipping up your backpack after tossing in a couple more lollipops.
You didn't know what to say, cheeks flushing red before you noticed Alfred pulling up near the sidewalk with Richard in the passenger's seat.
You shuffled over to the car, watching as Alfred exited the car and ruffled your hair before speaking, "You look happy, (____). I'm assuming it went well? I need to speak with Miss Melody regarding something. You can sit in the car while you wait."
Just like that, Alfred went to speak with Melody as you were left there.
Glancing towards the car, you gripped the straps of your bag before gripping the door handle with both hands and pulling hard, nearly stumbling backwards but managing to pry it open.
You took your bag off your shoulder and pushed it inside the car, pulling yourself up into the passenger's seat.
Leaning over, your hands struggled to reach for the car door to close it; but you were so close-
You heard a exasperated sigh from across from you before a hand reached out and slammed the door shut harshly, making you flinch instinctively. "Just ask for help, you can't reach it anyways."
Your hands balled in your lap, a lump forming in your throat. What were you supposed to say? What COULD you say? What would make him not get angry with you again?
"O-Okay." Your eyes darted towards Alfred's figure still conversing with Melody, why couldn't he hurry up? He KNOWS you don't want to be with him alone. Not again, he can't leave you with him again-
Please just come back-
"What's with the getup anyways? you some kind of ballerina or something?" Richard scoffed lightly, but to you, it was venom.
"Y-Yes, I want t-to learn Ballet." You muttered weakly, buckling in your seatbelt to focus on anything but him.
"Yeah? and how was it?" Why can't he just leave you alone?
"It was f-fun..." Your hands hoisted up your bag into the middle seat, your reddening eyes fixed on the window.
Hurry-
"Hey, listen I-I'm..."
Hurry up-
"Really.....s... about.."
Please just HURRY-
You barely had time to react before you felt a hand on your face- YOUR FACE-
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" You swatted Richard's hand away, shrinking into the corner, shaking hands covering your face.
You watched Richards expression twist from something that could've been shock and something else into something ugly, something that felt directed at YOU. "Jeez, Okay! Can't do anything right with you around..." He snarled, crossing his arms and turning away from you.
Just then, The driver side door opened.
"I had a lovely cjat with Miss Melody, I think that you'll really enjoy-" Alfred stopped mid sentence as he glanced in the rearview mirror, his smile faltering as he noticed Richards expression and you shrinking into the backseat, "Is something wrong?"
"No, nothing is wrong." You almost whimpered, mustering what little courage left to look Alfred in the eyes and lie that everything was alright.
Even when you know he didn't believe you.
Why would he believe you, when you don't even believe that you'll be okay?
Bruce lies, you know that. You know that Richard lies, why wouldn't he?
Alfred lies, just to try and give you a false sense of hope that maybe, just maybe- Bruce loves you.
Maybe that's why you were starting to accept that you were a liar, too.
.
.
.
You could only watch as the fleeting figure of your father guided Richard away from where you stood; like he was the one that needed comforting, guiding, HIS compassion?
How are you supposed to look him in the eyes and call him 'father?' Why are you supposed to care about him when you struggle to remember his face? To recall his voice? To distinguish him from a crowd when all you remember is his footsteps; heavy, familiar yet discomforting.
Why are you feeling this way?
Why can't he just look at you?
Why can't he be the person that everyone says he is?
It's not fair.
.
.
.
"91939."
The clock tower slid open, revealing one of the couple entrances to the batcave you knew of. You managed not to fall off of the clocktower this time, at least.
Slowly descending down the damp staircase, you watched from the stairwell of the Batcave as a girl in a purple bat suit was pacing around in circles.
Is that Batgirl?
.
.
.
*NEW CHARACTER UNLOCKED!*
Barbara Gordon
Relationship Status!
Alfred Pennyworth: 95/100
-He shouldn't have taken so long.
-He couldn't protect you again.
Bruce Wayne: -10/100
-Did he really talk about you?
-You've started to notice more of his flaws, his maliciousness.
Richard Grayson: -35/100
-Why does he want to talk now?
-He's still angry.
Barbara Gordon: ???/100
- Someone new.
A/N: Life is finally going good, but my phone doesn't want to save anything, I've had to rewrite a lot of this chapter because my phone isn't saving my writing. I think I'm just going to write in a different app to save my progress from now on.
Nov 11: Remember when i said that this was supposed to come out two days ago? Yeah I finally got Tumblr to start saving shit but my god the amount of edits I had to keep redoing because nothing was saving, even stuff I was trying to delete was horrendous. Poll coming out tmr when people see I'm no longer dead.
Taglist!
@the-dumber-scaramouche @sirenetheblogger @bellethesleepypotato @mev-fizzah-writes @tsxukikami @shycreatorreview @redsakura101 @feral-childs-word @lexi-username-1 @vanessa-boo @schnuggelig-schnecken-schnurrt @sleeping-l0s3rs @simpingpandas @vanilliona @shycreationdreamland @uu-uuu @crazycookies73307 @chericia @jellystar-star @sillysealsies @hopingtocleaemedschool @sukaretto-n @cantfindmelol @sunshinepower17 @ryuushou @kore-of-the-underworld @bongwaterflavoredgatorade @mxvoid26 @buckturd @moon0goddess @kurumbukaari @wishesofficial
It's going to take longer to post chapter 5, for some reason all my writing progress on phone does not save at all so I have to rewrite stuff I've rewritten 3 times already on my laptop. Maybe it'll be done by tonight if I'm quick, but people who want to be tagged recently might not be in the taglist if I want to get it out tonight 😭
Still working on my pathetic family ? Love it !
I'M ALIVE!
I'm currently rewriting chapter 5 now because some parts are written weirdly from the last time I had almost finished the chapter, and it's low-key kind of ass, like your thought process is that of an adults almost and not like a child. So I'm trying to fix that in the writing cause it's just THAT bad guys I don't want to post something that I don't think is any good.
This week, chapter 5 will actually come out. I'm not sure if it will be tomorrow or even Friday, but it's getting rewritten right now.
Hey I just wanted to check up on you!!
In some of your other posts you talked about some stuff going on, so I just wanted to know if ure doing okay :]
Oof, forgot to update in a long time now cause life has been crazy for the last seven months now but I'm doing a lot better now!
Haven't posted in so long because people in my family that were close to me as a kid keep dying every month. That and my health kind of went downhill and basically killed my urge to write more chapters.
Maybe it's a writing curse that a lot of aithors talk about, but every time I write bad shit happens in my life 😭
Little Girl
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The sound of pacing footsteps echoed in the batcave, echoing around the cave walls with the occasional water droplets dripping and the soft chirps of bats as they awoke from their slumber.
It was surreal. So surreal.
Barbara could hardly believe it, she was in THE Batman's secret lair! the mysterious vigilante that had been foiling the villains plans and bringing the criminals of gotham to justice for over six years now!
Of course he had to have a secret lair, a base of operations that he worked in. He had gadgets and always seemed to find out the Joker's plans after all so he had to have one-
"Ah, you're overthinking again." Barbara patted her cheeks with gloved hands, inhaling deeply before exhaling slowly.
It was still crazy to think that wearing a silly bat costume and accidentally stopping a couple of crimes inevitably made her cross paths with Batman and Robin.
He seemed a bit younger than herself, and she was in college!
It had taken an entire year, but now after taking an oath at the very graves of Batman's- no, Bruce's parents she was now officially a part of Batman and Robin group, like the three musketeers! It was exhilarating, it was nerve-racking, it was so-
"Who are you?" a soft voice asked, interrupting Barbara's chain of thoughts as her stomach dropped.
Whipping around towards the sound of the voice, Barbara raised a batarang towards the intruder-
Barbara's eyes stared down in disbelief, a little girl that couldn't be older than five or six staring up at her with dilated pupils, both arms raised towards her face to presumably protect her face.
"O-Oh my gosh I'm so sorry I thought you were an intruder-" Barbara rambled quickly, voice high pitched in panic as she quickly put the batarang back in her belt.
She could feel her chest swell with guilt, she almost just threw a batarang at a little girl's head. She probably just traumatized the poor little girl- She could've KILLED a child- She didn't expect a kid in purple pajamas to be in the batcave of all things.
How did she even manage to sneak up on her?
Why didn't Bruce or Dick tell her about the little girl? Alfred did say he was going to check up on someone but she didn't think it was a kid.
What was she even doing down here? She seemed too young to be a Robin, there wasn't even a second Robin. She definitely wasn't making gadgets or doing behind the scenes work in the Batcave.
How did she even get down here in the first place? she seemed too short to even get to the secret entrances!
Barbara watched as she slowly lowered her arms, her big eyes staring up at her.
"A-Are you okay? I didn't mean to scare you like that." Barbara said in a softer tone, realizing that she had been staring at the kid for longer than necessary.
"I'm okay, sorry that I scared you. My name is (____). You're batgirl, right? I've seen you in newspapers." Barbara almost raised an eyebrow as the little girl now known as (____) spoke with a timid voice. Kids didn't usually speak so perfectly, did they? Maybe it was a rich people thing and formal education.
"Y-Yeah, I am." Barbara kneeled down, offering a hand to the child in front of her and managing a soft smile despite her unease and guilt still lingering.
Maybe it was still just the fear from what just happened, but Barbara couldn't help but wonder...
Did (____)'s eyes always look like that?
NEW CHARACTER UNLOCKED: Barbara Gordon
.
.
.
A/N: A mini chapter, from the FUTUREEEEEEE! SOOOO Chapter 5 should hopefully be good by tmr unless tumblr or life decides to keep fucking me over more than it already has. Chapter 5 isn't going to be as long because shit keeps happening in life that was making progress so slow that I decided to basically make a mini chapter first to compensate for if chapter 5 ends up feeling too short.
Fucking hell i was writing a mini chapter that would show the perspective of another character and the fucking thing didn't save when I pressed save guys I hate my life.
It's supposed to come out tonight and I should hopefully be able to write it, just can't put in the taglist cause it's just that small of a chapter.
Also chapter 5 should be out tmr possibly at a very late, was supposed to be today but I was writing a new mini chapter to show something interesting from another characters point of view to give more to look forward to after an agonizing month of pain, pain, more pain and being busy with school that made my progress for chapter 5 so slow and it's not even as long as it should've been with the timeskip kill me. 😭
If chapter 5 comes out by tomorrow there will be a new poll too, I'm trying hard guys but with how bad my luck has been for the last month I can't promise anything :(
Chapter 5 is not done at the moment, currently experiencing some very bad stomach pain as of late and it's been really fucking with my school life and the time I have to write since I'm actively in pain and I have some important school shit to do that is essential to what I'm taking that is also being interrupted because of my bullshit health so my time to write is basically being cut shorter with each day I can't complete my school shit and I'm on a deadline here. 😭
Sorry guys it's a longer chapter compared to others and I can't get it done for maybe another 2-3 days if I'm lucky cause of all the bullshit that's happening rn that is making me unable to do a lot of things at the moment.
I'm stupid why'd I think the polls would be at the end of chapters man
Uhhhhhhh idk man I'm making polls and chapters separate since adding them both together seems a bit much, especially since there will be longer chapters like chapter 5.
Alr so since im too lazy to make 2 posts since theres not much of a point chapter 5 is going to be longer compared to other chapters and will go through a short timeskip that WILL be shown cause I'm not gonna make you go from 4 to 18 or something with 'as the years passed you became more sad and neglected until you decide to move out...' FUCK THAT SHIT CAUSE WYM YOU WENT THROUGH WHEN YOU WERE A TODDLER TO AN ADULT AND MOVING OUT IN ONE CHAPTER??? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH SHIT YOU COULD'VE WRITTEN ABOUT LIKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BATFAMILY AND WHY IT COULD BE STRAINED OR WHY THEY DON'T LIKE YOU??? HUHHH???? YOU CAN'T JUST SAY 'DAMIAN HATES YOUR GUTS' AND NOT ELABORATE ON IT OTHER THAN 'HE THINKS YOU'RE A STAIN ON THE WAYNE NAME' OR 'HE SAW YOU AS COMPETITION AT ONE POINT' MF THAT'S THE MOST DISAPPOINTING ASS SHIT GIVE US A REASON THAT ISN'T JUST THAT BULLSHIT CAUSE DAMN I WILL GIVE YOU ALL A GOOD FUCKING REASON I SWEARRRRRRR.
It's either that or you once had a good relationship with a character like Jason before he died but he dies, comes back and suddenly doesn't like you like bruh, at least show us that they got along, hello? That's like if I said 'you and Alfred had a great relationship.' During my story and all is it is just 'Alfred comforts you.' and I just cut out all the times Alfred has been there for you and cared for you like BRUHHHHHH how are you going to care about your relationship with the batfsmily if you're not given a reason to? 💀
Anyways the point is sorry my polls aren't in chapters, chapter 5 is going to be longer than the others because you grow up and sort of time skip except I'm showing it and expressing my frustrations with writing cause if I give you all a story that's 'you and Dick avoid eachother and were never close for some reason.' Then I've already failed this story, myself and you all by not putting in the effort to show WHY you don't get along with the family, especially when I know I can write something interesting that you all can enjoy.
My bad for turning this into whatever this is, I am dissatisfied with neglected reader fics and want to put as much effort into mine as possible if there's a chance that some of you are also not satisfied with them like me.
Here, Have fish.
Ok I know this is probably not going to happen but what if reader forgets the incident? like Bruce is probably not going to talk about it and neither will Alfred if he sees you're happier not remembering, and lets say she's left with a tiny scar on her nose, imagine if many years later she's talking to her friends and Dick passes by when one friend ask her about her scar only for reader to say something like "oh Idk, got it when I was small, not sure how" and Dick completelly crashes out because what do you mean you don't remember?? What do you mean you don't know the reason he has been unable to look you in the eyes?? The reason he completelly neglected you and overcompensated with the rest of his siblings because he could not handle the gilt when looking at your face is something that left your mind in like ten months, and I think this reader would have tried to build a relationship with Dick again only for him to completelly drive her away, he did it so he wouldn't hurt her again, problem he didn't have with the other robins, but to reader there was no other reason than there being something wrong with her. Agh I just love the angst
Yeah, this isn't going to happen in the story, but it definitely would be a possibility to happen since your the back of your head slammed into a table and that did fuck you up in a way that will be shown in chapter 5.
If the reader was to forget the incident, there would be a good chance that while she would attempt to befriend Dick again she would either freeze up or lose the courage to talk to him the moment he looks at her because while she doesn't remember what happened between them, her body sure as hell does and registers him as dangerous.
It's almost like muscle memory.
An even worse possibility is completely forgetting she even tried to attempt to get closer to Dick since she would never be checked by any doctors if her head was okay and she might develop some sort of memory loss where she starts forgetting things from times you jad tea parties to major events such as your own birthdays or how your first meetings went with some of the other siblings when they were first taken in by Bruce.
So, from your perspective, it looked like Dick was just kind to every other sibling but you. And it would only piss you off more and more since you couldn't remember a time you did anything wrong, and you would eventually start hating him since he felt the same way, right?
All you remember was one awkward meeting between you two and then him avoiding you more and more with each forgotten attempt to get closer as the years passed and, for some reason, feeling unsafe near him.
Good on you for thinking of angst scenarios, Anon! That shit's depressing!
My Pathetic Family
Not a funny joke.
TW: Death, Introverted behaviors (Bruh-) Panic attack (Not from you!) Detailed descriptions of gore!
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Alfred was getting increasingly worried for you as each day passed by.
Ever since the incident with Master Dick, you stopped playing with your favorite stuffed plushies all together, did not do any more tea parties he would personally partake in, and avoided sitting on the floor.
Now all you did the majority of the time was watch TV in rooms that were often forgotten about.
It was not like you hadn't done anything else, but Alfred found it difficult to get you to the park due to your... fears about encountering Master Dick.
He did not blame you, and while he did have a duty to treat all those in Wayne Manor with respect he found himself almost getting frustrated with the young boy at times more than he would like to admit.
He knew that it wasn't good for you to be in the manor all the time doing nothing as a toddler your age.
He also knew that forcing you to go outside would not be good for you.
He tried, once. You clung to his legs so tightly and stared up at him with such sadness and fear that he swore he could feel his own heart stop at such an expression.
These last three months since the incident you have not set a foot outside the manor, and it seemed like with each day that passed your fear was slowly increasing.
He was seeing a three year old turning into a recluse at such a young age because of one accident. Was it, though?
It was heartbreaking.
Alfred didn't see a way you would improve without some sort of guidance.
So, he would turn to Bruce.
Of course, he was not of much help.
He found himself saddened at that he was no longer surprised at the lack of effort.
He just wondered, why?
... It didn't matter. Not right now when he could see that (____)'s mental state was worsening. He couldn't have any more arguments with someone he considered his son when his daughter was hurting.
It reminded him of Bruce when he was a child who had just lost her parents, in a way. He didn't fail Bruce. He wouldn't fail (____), either.
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"Master (____), I would like you to come with me to the living room." Alfred requested, his voice soft as he watched you stiffen up.
You were still scared of going outside.
He was going to change that.
He outstretched his hand towards you, kneeling down to your height and giving you a warm smile. "Please."
You hesitantly reached your hand out before putting it in Alfred's.
Alfred stood up, leaning down slightly as his hand was in yours, and he led you out of your room and down the long hallways.
You clutched Alfred's hand instinctively as he led you towards the living room, your eyes looking around warily and occasionally behind you as you were guided farther and farther away from your bedroom.
Alfred gently ushered you into the living room, shutting the door behind him.
"No more hiding in your room, (____). Let's try something new, okay?" He said softly as you glanced around; noticing some key differences in the room.
The table was pushed off to the side as well as the couch, creative a wide space in the middle of the room.
On the floor were sketch papers, markers, crayons, oil pastels, and colored pencils with a large variety of colors.
You glanced up at Alfred with a confused expression, as if asking what was the purpose of this.
"It's to draw, Master (____). You haven't... haven't been as happy active in anything for quite a while now." Alfred approached you, sitting down in front of the paper and art utensils and patting the spot next to him.
"Come. Let's draw together, (____)."
You sat down next to Alfred, sitting criss-cross and peering up at Alfred. "Why drawing?" You asked, watching as Alfred picked up a yellow crayon and slid a paper in front of you and himself.
"Because you have a bright mind, (____). You just haven't shown it yet." He responded, sliding a blue crayon towards you.
"Draw whatever you like. I think you'll enjoy it more than you think you will."
You picked up the blue crayon, looking down at the paper and thinking about what to draw.
What did you like? You used to like your stuffies, not as much anymore, though. You liked tea party's, but you stopped having those since...
You didn't want to keep thinking of him. You didn't want to see his face full of anger in your head again-
He's already haunted you enough in your dreams.
"I... I like dogs." You muttered, dragging the crayon you held in your dominant hand and dragging it slowly across the paper.
You made a line, then another, and another.
Alfred watched as you started drawing, a smile crossing his face as he began to draw alongside you. He preferred to draw a cat.
He would glance occasionally at your drawing, watching you draw with a concentrated expression and tongue sticking out.
After 10 minutes of comfortable silence, you let out an annoyed groan.
"This doesn't lok-look like a dog." You frowned, bringing up the paper for Alfred to see.
It was a dog with a square chest, four small lines that were supposed to be legs, a wavy line that was supposed to be its tail and a round circle with two dots for eyes and and a smile for its mouth. The dog did not have any ears.
Alfred raised an eyebrow, his lips pursing as he tried not to smile at the drawing of a dog that did not, in fact, look like a dog.
"Nonsense, (____). It looks like a dog to me." Alfred responded, biting his lip slightly as he tried not to laugh.
"You-You're lying, you're smiling!" You whined, pointing a finger at Alfred accusingly.
"I-I am not, Master (____)-" a smile crept on Alfred's face, covering his mouth with a hand as he looked away.
"Yes you are!"
Yes he was.
The living room was filled with fits of laughter and childish giggles as you and Alfred spent the afternoon drawing weird looking animals, stick figures of you and Alfred at the park, and big flowers that actually looked like flowers.
It was a start, but it filled with Alfred with hope that maybe you would get better.
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Alfred was in the kitchen, sleeves rolled up as he took note that he had all his equipment for today's baked goods.
Measuring cups? Check. 2 large bowls? Check. Spatula? Check. Measuring spoons? Check. Muffin baking pan, baking cups, cooking spray...
While Alfred was making sure he had everything he needed, he couldn't help but notice small movements in the corner of his eye.
He turned around only to see your tiny hands grabbing at the edge of the table, up in your tippy toes in an attempt to climb onto it since the chairs were too big for you to sit on.
He would have to order smaller chairs later...
"Master (____), why are you trying to get on the table?" Alfred asked with a raised brow, his hands reaching down and picking you up by under your arms.
"I wanted to see!" You said, squirming in his grasp and trying to look over his shoulder to see what was so important that he was standing there in silence.
"I am making sure I have everything I need for blueberry muffins." Alfred explained, gesturing to the equipment as well as the ingredients he had on the kitchen counter.
"You're making muffins?" You asked, your big eyes staring up at him.
Alfred knew that look on your face, you wanted to eat the muffins once he was done making them.
He could see the way you kept looking at the equipment and ingredients on the table, a look of interest on your face.
Did you want to bake? Sensing a rare opportunity to teach you something new you seemed interested in, he quickly took it. "How about this, Master (____). If you help me make the blueberry muffins, I'll let you have some. How does that sound?" Alfred offered, setting you down gently on the tall chairs; bringing the ingredients and equipment to the table in favor of the table counter.
You nodded reluctantly, letting out a small huff. He couldn't keep those muffins from you!
"Here, can you spray oil in this baking tray? It's important that the muffins don't stick to top of the pan as they rise." Alfred explains, handing you a can of oil spray.
It seemed like an easier task than trying to get you to measure the flour, he was confident that your little arms wouldn't be able to hold up the bag of flour and you'd make a mess of the table.
Alfred carefully poured One and a half cups of flour into a measuring cup, he could hear you shaking the can vigorously and glanced over to see you spraying the oil into the muffin tray and around the top of it with both hands.
Relieved he made the correct choice, he focused on measuring the sugar next before he heard you shaking the can again and looked over to see you staring up at him with a mischiveous gleam.
Alfred didn't have time to question you before you sprayed him with oil.
Fortunately, he was wearing an apron that mostly took the brunt of the cooking oil. His right hand did have oil on it now, though.
He looked down at you as you let out a childish laugh, clutching the can of oil spray to your chest as you let out fits of laughter.
He wasn't very impressed, but it was hard for him to get mad. He hadn't seen you laugh like that in quite a while.
"That is enough of spraying from you, little one." He said firmly albeit without any real bite, gently taking the can away from your grasp.
He knew you didn't mean any real harm, it was just dumb kid's stuff.
he was glad you started becoming more playful and more willing to leave your bedroom.
He was happy you were improving.
You helped alfred whisk vegetable oil, eggs and milk together as well as lemon zest albeit with his steady hands keeping the bowl from slipping out of your grasp.
He would then add the mixutre to the flour, sugar as well as baking powder and salt, folding it in and then adding in the frozen blueberries.
He folded them in, making sure to not overmix the mixture and putting the mixture into the baking cups you had added into the muffin pan prior while you watched with curious eyes.
He would then put it into the oven and you cheered, clapping your hands together.
Alfred could feel his chest swell with affection, you deserved the world and so much more.
You ended up eating muffins with Alfred that day, they were tasty and you wanted to try baking again sometime.
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You colored in the lines of a coloring book as best as you could with a yellow marker, occasionally glancing up at the TV in the living room as you laid belly first on the fluffy carpet.
You had the remote right next to you.
You had turned on the TV and flipped through the channels before finding one that interested you, ballet.
You had seen ballet dancers on TV before, but you had recently gained an interest in them. The ballet dancers on TV were so beautiful, the women would twirl flawlessly and moved with such grace that shouldn't be possible but it was. It was an you wanted to do what they could do. They were special, and you wanted to be special, too.
You just... Were a bit scared to go to ballet classes right now, with other kids.
You wanted to ask Alfred if you could maybe have a private teacher or something. You didn't know how to interact with other kids and didn't want to get hurt again if you made them angry.
Shaking your head, your thoughts drifted to today.
Today was a special day, too.
It was your birthday. You were turning four years old today! You hadn't seen Alfred all day since you woke up, you hoped he was planning some sort of surprise.
Your attention from your drawing of the ballet dancers that looked more like stick figures than anything as the screen changed to some news channel.
You looked up at the screen, confusion in your eyes.
This hasn't happened before, ever.
What was the occasion? You could see a young news reporter in a white suit, he looked into the camera with terrified hazel eyes.
Or maybe who was behind it.
"Is this thing on? Harley, make sure it's on!" A voice yelled, you swore you could hear a "Yes, Puddin'!" in the background.
A man dressed in a purple suit with green hair and very, very pale skin sauntered up behind the table where the reporter was, clearing his throat "Hello, people of gotham! I know that not many of you yet have heard of me but trust me when I say, you will." The man spoke with confidence in his tone, puffing out his chest slightly.
He held a mallet in his hand, tossing it around in both hands occasionally like child's play and whistling.
He looked like a clown.
There was something wrong with him.
"I am the Joker. You may know for poisoning the water supply here and there, fighting Batman in public every once in a while..." He trailed off, looking off towards the terrified news reporter with a deranged smile.
You just noticed that he was cuffed to his seat, trying to pull his wirsts out of the metal cuffs to no avail.
"While I do enjoy the publicity on the back of news papers for these last few years, it's frankly quite insulting." he sneered, his smile twitching as he turned to meet the reporters gaze.
"Tell me, dear citizen. What do you think of me?" You could see the clown's hands twitch while holding the mallet.
"I-I-" The man couldn't speak, he was sweating heavily and was gasping for air as he tried desperately to pull his wrists through the cuffs to the point his wrists began to bruise and bleed.
"I th-think-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence before the Joker raised the mallet up into the air and smashed his face in with a deafening crack you would never forget.
Blood splattered across the table, the back of the seat that the reporter was in and on the mallet.
A choked gurgle escaped the man, somehow still alive with his head dented in by the mallet before Joker swung again; this time causing his brain to splatter against the back of the wall, his skull shattering under the weight of the impact and crunch as his head was caved in,leaving the bottom of his chin the only thing somewhat intact.
Your wide eyes watched, taking in the blood, the brain matter and how much red and pink there was.
You could only watch as the Joker struggled to pull out the mallet from the man's dented in skull, finally pulling it out with a heave and ripping part of the top of his spinal cord out in the process with a wet squelch and causing tiny skull fragments to fly on the table, the floor and on the cadaver's lap.
You weren't focusing on what the Joker was saying at this point if he said anything at all or laughed hysterically that he killed a man on live television: You were focused on how the crimson liquid dripped down the table, how the pink mush slid down the wall and how dark the colors were.
Your hands tapped on the carpet around you before grabbing the remote and turning off the TV, staring down at your drawing blankly.
You picked up a red and pink marker and started to color in a new drawing.
It was the only color you could think of right now.
You couldn't get it out of your head.
Alfred would burst into the room minutes later, worry and fear on his face as he had rushed into the living room. "(____), you didn't have the TV on, did you?" He asked with thinly veiled concern, quickly scooping you up into his arms. "No Alfy. I wasn't watch-watching TV." You said calmly, burying your face into his neck.
You didn't want to make Alfred unhappy by saying you did, you just...
Couldn't risk getting hurt again.
You could hear Alfred let out a sigh of relief, his shoulders relaxing slightly. "Good, I think It is time I showed you something Master (____). I want you to close your eyes, alright?"
"Okay."
Alfred walked out of the living room with you in his arms, not noticing how the drawing hidden under another that was of a stickfigure in a purple suit hitting another stickfigure with what looked like a big hammer and the pink and red scirbbled over the mallet, a poorly drawn table and the man's face.
NEW CHARACTERS!
The Joker
-There's no good in him, What does Bruce see in YOU?
Harley Quinn
-Psychotic bitch, just another accomplice. Just as bad as him.
Relationship status!
Bruce Wayne (your father): -5/100
-You haven't seen him in months.
-You wished he stopped that evil man in time.
-Failure.
Alfred Pennyworth (Your only friend): 95/100
-You only need him. No one else.
-You feel bad about lying to him
Richard Grayson (The one you fear): -30/100
-You've avoided him for months and haven't seen him, but he still haunts your dreams.
Taglist!
@the-dumber-scaramouche @sirenetheblogger @bellethesleepypotato @mev-fizzah-writes @tsxukikami @shycreatorreview @redsakura101 @feral-childs-word @lexi-username-1 @vanessa-boo @schnuggelig-schnecken-schnurrt @sleeping-l0s3rs @simpingpandas @vanilliona @shycreationdreamland @uu-uuu @crazycookies73307 @chericia @jellystar-star @sillysealsies @hopingtocleaemedschool @sukaretto-n @cantfindmelol @sunshinepower17 @ryuushou @kore-of-the-underworld @bongwaterflavoredgatorade @mxvoid26
A/N: Soooooo, that's the bad unavoidable experience. You don't catch any breaks do you? I never did say the experience would be caused by the family. The unavoidable is infact a direct consequence of choosing hobbies that are mostly done indoors. If one more hobby was an outdoor one this would have been avoided since you wouldn't be watching TV at the time. How you feeling about this? The taglist took a bit to write in which is why this is semi later than what I posted. If I didn't tag you I'm sorry, it took like 20-25 minutes to tag everyone. ALSO! ballet is going to be learned in chapter 5. You kinda aren't going to in chapter 4 cause of uhhhhhh well what happened above.
Chapter 4 is going to be delayed until either 10 tonight or 10:45 PM, possibly a little bit earlier.
My phone crapped out on me for almost the entire day and I just got it to start working. 😭 The chapter is very close to being done but I need to check it over for grammar mistakes and update the taglist.
Sorry guys!
will u create a series masterlist in the future?
Yes, I will. I plan to post quite a bit of shkrt chapters since I'm often busy, but I haven't made a masterlist before, so I have to look up how. 💀
Alright, poll results!
1. Drawing
2. Ballet
3. Baking
Alright, I see how most of you want to stay indoors. Who wants to leave the comfort of their home anyway?
I can see why drawing was first place. Who doesn't like drawing? It requires creativity, and kids will go wild with such big imaginations. The point is, kids have a lot of creativity, and I'm sure you will as you get older.
Ballet could be some good exercise, you'll get a little more flexible, and you will probably have better concentration, too!
Baking is exciting! It's easy, relieves stress and is great for bonding with people!
Notes:
One positive and negative experience will now be locked...
You will be spending more time with Alfred, your relationship with him will increase!
(____)'s new hobbies will have you mostly staying inside the manor.
One negative experience will now be unavoidable due to this.
These will have consequences in your development and mental health...
Chapter 4 will be out late Friday/ early Saturday!
POLL!
(There will be three hobbies chosen, so don't worry if the hobby you chose isn't first!)
NOTE: You're only nearing four years old by the start of chapter 4, so a lot of hobbies such that require you to be physically strong, fast or flexible at the moment are not available to you. (You're mostly a sort of normal child with messed up thinking, you ain't no Damian Wayne.)
Watching TV, reading, writing, going to the park, and walking are not going to be considered new hobbies since you already do them or are already being taught how to by Alfred. I just haven't expanded on any of it yet.
You can also learn hobbies as you get older, so there will be more polls eventually!
What will be your new hobbies?
Drawing
Ballet
Bike riding
Photography
Exploring the outdoors
Baking