Another Itch Fox from The King Blues scandal..
Within weeks of meeting Jonny itch Fox, via the internet, naturally (Facebook this time), he had professed he was falling in love with me, wanted to marry me and wanted me to move in. He told me it was love at first sight after our first date, and by date two, before we had even kissed, he was asking me to be his girlfriend. I agreed by date three.
I didn’t know anything about his history at this point, I barely knew who he was; I only knew by googling his songs after I agreed to a date with him.
After claiming he was in love with me, and always ‘so much’, that I was his soulmate and wanting to marry me (even at one point going so far as to take my ring measurement and pretending to make a mental note of it), his behaviour towards me got increasingly worse. By this point I had grown very real feelings for him, and was genuinely considering moving in after his continuous pressuring.
The abuse took on all forms, but really the things that hurt the most was the emotional abuse. Tirades of how I was a loser, that I’m old (I’m 6 months older than him), how my looks won’t last much longer and my personality isn’t up to scratch. He would even make nasty comments about me sexually and physically, intimately. He called my friends white trash and losers, when he wasn’t making me delete them, and even insulted the way I spoke and dressed – something he at first used to say he liked about me.
The first few times I got a glimpse of this nasty side, I was in shock and left speechless. But then I started finding my voice, once I realised that was how he was and it wasn’t a one-off. I wasn’t used to talking to someone I was in love with this way, but I had to learn fast to defend and protect myself. After a while his words stopped having an effect as I was so used to hearing the same insults, it literally stopped registering in my mind. Being called a cunt, whore and bitch repeatedly went through one ear and out the other (all the while he was tweeting and singing about respecting women, hahaha). Maybe that was a coping mechanism. But really all it meant was that he would just start saying nastier things, more hurtful things.
After practically living with him for a week straight because he never wanted me to leave, one night he threw his shoulder out and I spent the whole evening massaging it, rubbing Deep Heat on it, pandering to him and even walked on his back. The next morning I did the same again, but after I made him breakfast while he laid in bed, and then tidied his flat up a little before leaving as he had a photoshoot round there later that day, and didn’t want him to further injure himself. Within what must have been minutes of me leaving he was messaging girls and asking them on dates on Instagram. I even suspect he probably did some of this while I was in the kitchen cooking. I didn’t know any of this until the story of Brit’s expose broke, and that was when girls started sending me messages and screenshots of him asking them out..
One time, after he had actually gone to meet a girl, I questioned him as I instinctively knew he was with another girl, and he gave me the most horrific abuse. He was outraged that I would dare question where he had been, when he had apparently been at a work related meeting with two men. He was so angry about it I had to believe him. I apologised, twice. But it wasn’t enough. My behaviour was too unreasonable, according to him. This went on for about a week. I had to keep apologising, explaining myself, he would never accept. He even accused me of improper behaviour, and the whole time he was just lying through his teeth.
Btw, I know for a fact he wasn’t at a business meeting as the girl he met with (who he had pestered for a date the day before and even arranged to meet again during that evening) has been in contact and provided me with dates and times. When I called he was on a train platform waiting for a train, not at a meeting which he alleged he had to leave due to my apparent shouting (that also never happened, I never shouted). His ability to lie so in detail and convincingly is awe inspiring, but equally sociopathic.
Needless to say, we weren’t very stable, mostly because he was always lying to me. One time we decided to give it another shot while he was on tour, he promised me he wasn’t going to do anything with another girl, that it was just us. That very day, within hours of these promises, he met up with a girl from Manchester who he had met from Instagram and then guestlisted her to his show. I don’t know what happened after that, and I may never will. He denied it adamantly until I told him I had seen her brag about it on Instagram.
The day after that he told me he was getting back to London, but very late as he was working all day. But actually he was meeting up with Brit, and she spent the night. The whole time this was happening he was texting me saying how proud he was that I was his girlfriend and how excited he was to see me – which he tried to schedule in the next day after seeing Brit.
There is so, so much more I could say but to be honest, many people are gonna figure out who I am and it’s simply embarrassing to admit those other things happened to me, as if all this wasn’t humiliating enough. Plus, it’s dangerous territory for legal reasons. I won’t pretend I was an angel, I am hot tempered and feisty and in the end probably gave as good as I got (the last weekend I saw him directly before the scandal broke, I threw my shoes at him), but that is still no excuse for his behaviour.
I’ve heard he is now claiming he is seeking help and is involved in some kind of program, and as a result has to break off all communication with women. He’s claiming he blocked every girl he was talking to and will not to talk to any more for a long time as it feeds his sex and womanising addiction. But that’s a lie, again I have proof that whilst he was saying this, he was in fact following, messaging and talking to girls. Some girls are new ones, others are old. He’s back at it. He has no remorse and guilt, and even blames me and Brit, and all the other girls, for everything that’s happened. He doesn’t seem to realise it’s his behaviour that is shocking people, not us coming out with it.
He is so deluded I think he sincerely thought he was a good, honest boyfriend.. So many texts and statements along the lines of this. All the while he had been cheating with other girls, or trying to by asking them out.
I battled with writing this for weeks, I wanted to believe he would recover and needed my sympathy – albeit from afar, because he can’t be around women. I loved him and I wanted to fix him, even when it all came out and he broke my heart, and me, into pieces beyond repair I still loved and cared for him. I knew I couldn’t ever be with him - that was out of the question - but I genuinely wanted him to get better. Now I realise he will never get better if he’s getting away with it. He faked guilt and remorse that first week when it all came out but it was all just an act, like everything else he said to me.
As a side note, he told me Poems & Songs and the beginning verse of Pure Fucking Love was about me. I’d be interested to hear if he said to anyone else those same songs were about them.
Blog header illustration by Brit Bones.
I mention Brit often in this post. Her blog of her experience with Itch is here: http://paintmybones.tumblr.com/post/141854601144/we-are-women-we-are-strong-the-truth-of-the-king
Also please read: http://jonny-itch-fox.tumblr.com/
And this blog post by the mother of his child: http://scarletfoxx.tumblr.com/post/20280882521/the-danger-of-worshipping-false-idols-the-fall-of
