Knives & Litany

Naila • 20 • Writer • Poet •

[nail-in-the-wall]

Love

If not to hold yours

What are hands for?

If not to look into yours

What are eyes for?

If not to kiss yours

What are mouths for?

If not to feel for yours

What are hearts for?

- nail-in-the-wall (16.5.2022)

[nail-in-the-wall]

The life and death of a match

I gave you the match

To build yourself a fire

You lit me up with the flame

Rubbed two dry sticks in the rain

Magnified paper in the sunlight

Put coal on a lit fireplace

Hit wires in the right way

And burned me to ash and grey

I never saw it coming

The light-hearted jokes

The candlelit dinners

The bonfire nights outside

The campfires in wintertime

The warmth in your house

The keys in the ignition

For a moments we felt so inflamed

That we set wildfires in each other

That couldn't be smothered away

It didn't set me ablaze enough to know

That fires destroy as well as create

And sometimes they die out

Because they were extinguished

Not because they naturally died away

You enlighten me to the change

By dousing my flame away

- by nail-in-the-wall (6.1.22)

[nail-in-the-wall]

THE FINAL CURTAIN

You turned my summer into winter

I needed a sweater just to feel better

But it was you, not the weather

I was always so warm

But then you made me cold

By pulling me away from the fireplace

Just so I was lost in you like a haze

I was always so bright

But you dimmed down the light

By blowing every candle in me out

Just like little seeds of doubt

I could really have done without

I was always inside all of the time

Locked away from everyone else you knew

Never treated the same as they were too

When you were mine I always had to hide

Because I never did anything that you liked

You loved to love me only when we could hide

Only when you were the only thing on our minds

Because you only loved the way I loved you

You didnt love loving me because I was lovely

You just loved the love you were getting out of me

Because I was never worth the limelight,

The crowd, the standing ovation or the smiles

You never thought I was worthy of your time

I don't know why I even bothered sometimes

Because I was never the highlight,

The star of the show or invited to the afterparty

I was just the pillow fort that fell to the floor

I was just the hinge that only joined half the door

I was just the sand castle that never lasted the storm

I think its time for the final curtain, the last act,

Because this dress rehearsal just isn't working

- by nail-in-the-wall (7.12.21) This is part of a two part series about dramatic irony. It was influenced by a situation that I never saw coming or knew could change. Part 2 will be posted sometime soon.

[nail-in-the-wall]

PIECES OF ME

Pieces of me

Fall to the floor

Like the petals on

Forget me nots

Like raindrops

From the clouds

Like words from

Your stupid mouth

You don't like it

So I lose a piece

Just to fit into

Your ideal version of me

You don't like that

So I lose a piece

I let it down gently

Like I'm putting it to sleep

You don't like this

So I lose a piece

Just to exist

In the place you want me in

But what is existing

When you are

Losing yourself

Losing your mind

Losing the love of your life

Like you never

Mattered to begin with

And all you existed for was

Everything that suited him

- nailinthewall (4.12.21)

[nail-in-the-wall]

You

It's not love

But it should be

Because only a world

Where you are in love with me

Is a world I want to see

As loving you is easy

And I like the simplicity

Of you with me

- nail-in-the-wall (30.5.21 - I will be posting on here again! Enjoy!)

[nail-in-the-wall]

Unattended

Dont want nobody else

If I ain't got you

Its not worth it to pursue

Its means nothing if I'm without you

Letting you get the best of me

Is all I'll ever want or need

I'm dying for your attention

So please dont leave me unattended

- nail-in-the-wall [23.2.21] (I wrote this about this forgetful guy I like who I like to refer to as a fish. Enjoy!)

[nail-in-the-wall]

Remember me

I dont really mind

If this goes anywhere

I'm just trying to find

Something clever to say

Because I get the feeling

You're gonna go away

So I will settle for

You remembering me

So I dont really mind

If we end up going nowhere

Anywhere is good for me

I just hope you remember

The way I smiled

On that midnight street

When you were laughing

But couldn't seem to breathe

The time we spent

Smoking in the summer heat

It felt like a dream to me

A two person reverie

So I dont really mind

Where we go from here

I'm just trying to find

Something clever to say

- nail-in-the-wall [20.2.21] (I wrote this song yesterday and had to share!)

[nail-in-the-wall]

You could do no wrong in my eyes

In my eyes

You could do no wrong

Everything is right

If its you

Even if it's not

I know you could do no wrong

Even if you wanted to

I'll always see

Into the eyes of you

Nothing could change my point of view

Cos I'd still be looking at you

I'll always see the light

Even if you

Are tinged in a shadow of the night

You are piece of my heart

And I could never, ever

Connotate you to anything dark

You are my favourite shade of maroon

Cos it'd be easy to misunderstand you

But I understand you

More than you even do

I understand you

Wouldnt do anything wrong

Cos that's a lyric

From another persons song

And you're not just anyone

You could no wrong

In my eyes

- nail-in-the-wall [18.10.19]

[nail-in-the-wall]

"I wish only the best for you in every single thing you do."

- nail-in-the-wall [16.10.19] (Written about my favourite human and lovely friend ebbs. He has released a song called Breathe, under the artist name Seb, on all the usual streaming places! Please have a listen!)

[nail-in-the-wall]

"Pull me away from my thoughts and this place. I'd be stuck without the thought of your face. Dont let time slip away, we only have today."

- nail-in-the-wall [15.10.19] (This was written to appreciate how friendship takes you out of bad moments and how just the thought of a friend can soothe you and how the time I feel best is around mine. Its the chorus of a song I wrote about Ebbs - my favourite human - around a year ago. Speaking of songs, lol I'm so bad at this, Seb - ebbs is my nickname for him - has released a song called Breathe and its amazing! Please have a listen! Its amazing! I love it!

[nail-in-the-wall]

amabilia refluit / lovely ebbs

Caught up, delving deep

Lost in the realm of my mind

Hearing those words of yours

In every place, in every space

Over and again in straight lines

How do I express

Everything you represent?

Every word I've ever thought about you

Within the confines of my head?

You're amabilia refluit

And more than just it

And your words, they seem to fit

In every place, in every space

Of the world

That we're living in

Like my personal favourite adverb

There you were

Like my favourite word

There you were

And I cant describe you

Not with one word

Not with a million

Only without words

And you can't understand

The meaning behind

Every letter I've sent

Cos you've never been in my head

And you can never understand

Why to me

You are truly amabilia refluit

- nail-in-the-wall [14.10.19] (Lovely is my favourite way to describe my best friend Ebbs. So that's why I've added "Amabilia Refluit" which means "Lovely Ebbs" in Latin to this poem. I always write a quote/poem the five days after he releases his latest song and tell people to listen to it cos I like him and I like doing it! I genuinely love him and all his music! Anyway, it's on all the usual streaming places and is called Breathe by Seb. Please have a listen! You'll love it!

[nail-in-the-wall]

"You clouded my mind and I became plagued by the rain that had taken my sanity's place."

- nail-in-the-wall [13.10.19] (Whenever I meet a new person, my mind gets clouded by emotion and I forget who I am. Anyone else have the habit of doing this?)

[nail-in-the-wall]

Between Breathes

Late, late at night

Like a bird, I was taking on flight

Dark, darkness in the sky

A light, a life, had joined my eyes

Music moved me

Like silk on a sleeve

Like blossom from a tree

Like someone who loved me

I-I-I found something new

Something worth writing too

Something that sounded like you

Day, daylight makes my night

Worth joining into the fight

The sound, the signs of being alright

Taste better than sweet

Sweeter than honey

More valuable than any currency

The taste of my mind

Slips from my tongue

Like the sounds of love

And touches everyone

- nail-in-the-wall ~ © ~ [12.10.19] (I was watching one of those cool harmony videos on YouTube and remembered an old writing technique I used to love using. Its amazing! And I used it to write this.)

[nail-in-the-wall]

"I wonder what has become of me when words evade me. Who am I without these morsels of poetry that I speak?"

- nail-in-the-wall ~ © ~ [10.10.19] (Just a quick bit of advice. If you find yourself in a spell of writers block, then I'd suggest writing about how something made you feel. Could be anything in the entire world. Writers block happens when you pressure yourself to the point where your mind shuts down in an attempt to get you to stop pressuring yourself. It helps you to stop overthinking and is actually really beneficial to you in the long run. Writing about how you feel literally allows you to step out of your mind and further helps you to get rid of the stress you've put yourself under. If you have writers block, do NOT stop writing. That's the worst thing you can do. It'll make it harder to get back into. Write about how your favourite song, animal, poem, tv show, or anything at all. Just write about something that makes you feel.)

[nail-in-the-wall]

"I love talking to you. You mean the world to me."

- nail-in-the-wall ~ © ~ [9.10.19] (This is directed at all my friends cos they're all amazing in their own way and really good to me. I hope the universe gives them all they want to receive from life and that they are all having a good day!)

[nail-in-the-wall]

Under Concrete

Under concrete

Swimming to the edge

Air is being tugged from my head

And my breaths are in unrest

Hands are gripping lead

Eyes are closed, too burdened to open

Mouth is squeezing out letters

That will never be heard

Just a string of still verbs

Still stuck under concrete

Nothing can save me

Drying around me

And I'm dying to breathe easy

But I am entombed

Wrapped up in a womb

Of a life I didnt choose

I wish I knew how I got here

But all the thoughts

Have disappeared

Under concrete

I am doomed

Cos here I'm forever tombed

Might as well be the moon

Cos in the dark I rest

And in the light

I am forced to evaporate

- nail-in-the-wall ~ © ~ [8.10.19] (Have felt suffocated and emotionally drained so wrote this.)

[nail-in-the-wall]

"You are the only memory I wish I didnt have."

- nail-in-the-wall ~ © ~ [5.10.19] (This is about the guy that made me upset enough to write Phoenix In Embers. I posted it a while ago. Its really positive and probably will help some of you guys so have a read. Anyway, I thought about him today and this quote was made.)