“Did you really call the police?”
“My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me!”
“You’ve seen one too many movies!”
“Movies don’t create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!”
“No, please don’t kill me, Mr. Ghostface, I wanna be in the sequel!”
“Should I let the machine get it?”
“Are you alone in the house?”
“You bitch, where the fuck are you?”
“Not so fast, we’re going to play a little game.”
“Guess who just called the police and reported your sorry motherfucking ass!”
“I think I’m dying here, man!”
“I’m going to rip you up, bitch!”
“What’s your favorite scary movie?”
“I’m gettin’ another beer, you want one?”
“I’ll be right back!”
“Do you like scary movies?”
“No, you listen to me you little bitch! You hang up on me again and I’ll gut you like a fish!”
“Mmmm… corn syrup. Same stuff they used for pig’s blood in ‘Carrie.’ ”
“Oh, my God. I thought you were dead.”
“I never thought I’d be so happy to be a virgin.”
“Who’s there?”
“You tricked me.”
“I wanna see breasts.”
“We all go a little mad sometimes.”
“The police are always off track with this shit! If they’d watch Prom Night, they’d save time! There’s a formula to it. A very simple formula!”
“EVERYBODY’S A SUSPECT!”
“If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath - would you be standing in the horror section?”
“She was never attacked. I think she made it all up.”
“The girl has some serious issues.”
“What if she did it? What if she killed them?”
“Maybe she’s a slut, just like her mother.”
“Teen suicide is out this year and homicide is a much healthier, therapeutic expression.”
“Where do you get this shit?”
“But this is life. This isn’t a movie.”
“It’s all a movie. It’s all one great big movie. Only you can pick your genre.”
“If I’m right about this, I could save a man’s life.”
“How do you - gut someone?”
“It’s called tact, you fuck-rag.”
“It’s the millennium. Motives are incidental.”
“Well I don’t really believe in motives. I mean, did Norman Bates have a motive?”
“See, it’s a lot more scarier when there’s no motive.”
“You’re not a virgin. Now you got to die. Those are the rules.”
“This game is like a scary movie. How do you think it’s going to end?”
“What’s the matter? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Fairness would be to rip your insides out and hang you from a tree so we can expose you for the heartless, desensitized little shits that you are!”
“I will totally protect you. Yo, I am so buff, I got you covered, girl.”
“There’s always some stupid bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend.”
“That is so sexist. The killer could easily be female. Basic Instinct.”
“Why are you doing this?”
“It’s all part of the game. It’s called, GUESS HOW I’M GONNA DIE?”
“Who am I? The beer wench?”
“Looks like we’ve got a serial killer on our hands!”
“ ‘Serial Killer’ is not really accurate. Gotta knock off a couple more to get that title.”
“If I may say so, you are much prettier in person.”
“I didn’t kill anybody.”
“You still haven’t told me your name.”
“I want to know who I’m looking at.”
“I thought she was dead.”
“How does it feel to be almost brutally butchered? People want to know. They have a right to know! How does it feel?”
“I am two seconds away from calling the police!”
“They’ll never make it in time.”
“Wait, I thought we were going to go out.”
“Don’t hang up on me.”
“I told you not to hang up on me.”
“Why can’t I be a Meg Ryan movie? Or even a good porno.”
“You’re not supposed to be here.”
“Why don’t you wanna talk to me?”
“Well, you’re not going to be alone any more, right? If you pee, I pee. Is that clear?”
“It’s called subtlety. You should look it up.”
“Just think - if they make a movie about you, who’s gonna play you?”
“It’s so sad. Her mom and dad found her hanging from a tree limb, her insides on the outside.”
“I always had a thing for ya, [NAME]!”
“Cut Casper, that’s a wrap!”
“What do I have to do to prove to you that I’m not a killer?”
“Can you see me right now?”
“You make me so sick. Your entire havoc-inducing, thieving, whoring generation disgusts me.”
“Don’t freak yourself out, okay? We’ve got a long night ahead of us.”
gracieabrams
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