a deadly thing

i blew all my covers.

[natuska-a]

hi,  everyone !  this  is  a  private  &  highly  selective   natasha romanoff    blog  of  the marvel universe.  this  will  mostly  follow  mixed  canon  (  mcu,  comics,  avengers  game  )  and  is  highly  influenced  by  headcanons.  loved  by  jess (  24,  lesbian,  she/her  ).

google  doc.    memes.     promo.

blogroll  /  where  you  can  find  me  :  @featherstcnes​ ( multimuse ) &  @sabcrlost​  (  bo-katan  kryze  of  star  wars  )  &  @merzcst​  (  the  darkling  of  the  grishaverse  )  &  @pathwronged​  (  ellie  williams  of  the  last  of  us  )  &  @billysrussc​  (  billy  russo  of  the  punisher / marvel  )

[natuska-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE.

hi, all. i’ll be moving natasha to my multimuse where she’ll stay as a secondary muse. i’m really just not feeling the marvel rpc right now aside from my billy russo blog ( @billysrussc ) and i’d rather just plop her back on my multimuse and keep her there. i think my days of having nat on a solo blog are done and this was an attempt to bring her back recently but i’m just not feeling like i thought i would. if you’d like to follow me for my marvel muses, you can follow me at my multi @featherstcnes or my billy russo blog, @billysrussc . ily all !

[natuska-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE.

hi, all. i’ll be moving natasha to my multimuse where she’ll stay as a secondary muse. i’m really just not feeling the marvel rpc right now aside from my billy russo blog ( @billysrussc ) and i’d rather just plop her back on my multimuse and keep her there. i think my days of having nat on a solo blog are done and this was an attempt to bring her back recently but i’m just not feeling like i thought i would. if you’d like to follow me for my marvel muses, you can follow me at my multi @featherstcnes or my billy russo blog, @billysrussc . ily all !

[natuska-a]

THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE.

hi, all. i’ll be moving natasha to my multimuse where she’ll stay as a secondary muse. i’m really just not feeling the marvel rpc right now aside from my billy russo blog ( @billysrussc ) and i’d rather just plop her back on my multimuse and keep her there. i think my days of having nat on a solo blog are done and this was an attempt to bring her back recently but i’m just not feeling like i thought i would. if you’d like to follow me for my marvel muses, you can follow me at my multi @featherstcnes or my billy russo blog, @billysrussc . ily all !

[natuska-a]

hi, i’ll be around soon to get to my drafts, i know i suck <3 AKLSDJLASKD

if you want to plot at all i’ll be hiding in ims and on discord ! mutuals are free to ask for my handle. ily all !

[natuska-a]

wanda maximoff / mxndwitch​.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐀 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐎𝐏𝐋𝐄. she had hidden behind her brother her whole life, shy and reserved around strangers, so being in an unknown country surrounded by strangers she had wronged not long ago, was a lot for her to take, especially given the immense grief she felt after losing her brother. she knew natasha was trying to be KIND, but wanda still didn’t quite know how to react to it. it still felt surreal to be here as part of the Avengers and not fighting them anymore. so much had changed in the past weeks, but she WAS grateful for the team to have accepted her, albeit the bad choices Wanda had made. “i hope i will fit in”, she said softly, attempting a grateful smile, which didn’t quite reach her eyes. natasha was a force to be reckoned with and the girl couldn’t deny that she already looked up to the older woman, eager to learn from her, but everything about this new beginning came with devastating pain for what she has left behind.

it  almost  felt  like  clockwork  at  the  avengers  compound,  constantly  training,  perusing  through  shield  mission  plans,  and  just  trying  to  grow  accustomed  to  the  new  life  that  they’d  all  had.  things  felt  different  in  a  way  she  couldn’t  quite  place,  though  she  was  adjusting.  she  always  did.  the  new  additions  to  the  team  would  eventually  become  pieces  of  the  well  oiled  machine  that  the  avengers  were.  they  had  their  moments  where  things  weren’t  quite  so  easy,  but  at  the  end  of  the  day,  they  made  it  all  work.  hearing  wanda  speak,  nat  offered  her  a  gentle  smile,  it  barely  tugging  at  the  corner  of  her  lips.  “ you  will. ”  at  the  end  of  the  day,  they  were  just  a  team  of  people  that  had  barely  anything  in  common,  searching  for  some  common  ground.  “ i’ve  always  worked  on  my  own.  i  still  do. ”  the  avengers  were  her  family  (  she’d  never  really  had  one,  but  this  was  as  much  as  she  could  ever  compare  it  to  )  but  even  they  couldn’t  hold  her  back  from  her  life  she  still  kept  from  them.  a  life  that  had  gotten  her  the  reputation  she’d  kept  throughout  her  entire  life.  the  black  widow,  a  force  to  be  reckoned  with.

“ if  you  ever  need  anything,  you  know  where  to  find  me. ”  a  beat.  “ training,  questions,  anything. ”  there  was  always  something  going  on  in  the  compound,  shield  agents  running  around,  people  trying  to  make  sense  of  it  all.   “ even  if  finding  me  is  just  to  complain  about  hating  tony,”  she  added,  a  teasing  smirk  on  her  lips.  “ i  swear,  that  man  can  drive  me  to  the  brink  of  insanity  and  back  again  in  a  span  of  a  couple  of  minutes. ”  pausing,  a  sigh  escaped  her  lips,  a  hand  moving  to  rest  on  her  hip  as  she  looked  at  wanda.  “      ---------     how  are  you  doing ? ”  her  tone  of  voice  made  it  clear  she  wasn’t  just  asking  generally,  but  she  wasn’t  about  to  simply  push  the  other  to  talk  about  anything,  either.  natasha  hated  talking  about  anything  personal  when  it  came  to  herself,  so  she  truthfully  wouldn’t  blame  the  other  if  wanda  shut  her  out  immediately. 

[steverogsrs-deactivated20210418]

i’m  not  looking  for   𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨.    and  i’m  way  past    asking  permission .     earth  just  lost  her    𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭    defender .     so  we’re  here  to  fight   -   and  if  you  wanna  stand  in  our  way…    𝔀𝓮'𝓵𝓵  𝓯𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽  𝔂𝓸𝓾  𝓽𝓸𝓸 .   [ … ]    most  of  us  are  going  somewhere  we  know .    that  doesn’t  mean  we  should  know     what     to  expect .    be  careful .     𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤  𝐨𝐮𝐭  𝐟𝐨𝐫  𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡  𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫  .    this  is  the  fight  of  our  lives …    and  we’re  gonna    win .      whatever  it  takes .

[natuska-a]

“     ---------      what  happened? ”  she’d  only  turned  away  for  a  few  moments     --------     clearly  a  moment  or  two  too  long.  of  course,  she  knew  the  only  person  anyone  could  count  on  was  themselves.  she  couldn’t  hold  herself  responsible  for  anyone  else,  for  being  anyone’s  savior.  she’d  gone  far  too  long  learning  that.     the  only  person  that  will  ever  be  there  to  save  you  is  yourself,  natalia.     it  wasn’t  safe  to  stay  in  this  spot,  she  knew  that  --  she  could  still  hear  the  commotion  in  the  background,  but  she  doubted  that  either  of  them  were  really  in  a  position  to  move  yet.  “ who  did  this? ”     /     @solereus​     ⧗

[natuska-a]

getting  injured  was  part  of  the  job.  she’d  always  ended  up  patching  herself up  (  something  she’d  perfected  over  time  )  but  the  initial  pain  after  the  adrenaline  wore  off  somehow  still  took  her  by  surprise  every  time.  she’d  learned  to  get  her  mind  off  of  it  by  distracting  herself,  but  it  wasn’t  always  that  simple.  there  was  an  ache  in  her  side  that  hadn’t  been  there  before,  along  with  a  few  other  bruises  that  she  was  sure  would  present  themselves  as  the  hours  passed.  there  was  a  ringing  in  her  ear  that  she  wasn’t  sure  was  from  the  gunshot  that  had  been  far  too  close  for  comfort  or  from  something  else,  but  she  brought  her  focus  back  to  the  situation  at  hand,  reloading  her  gun.  at  this  point,  she’d  lost  track  of  the  enemy.  for  all  she  knew,  they  were  alone  and  dealing  with  the  aftermath  of  another  failed  mission.  

“    --------     are  you  okay? ”  her  voice  was  tired,  worn,  exhaustion  clear  in  her  tone  despite  wanting  to  keep  her  current  state  under  wraps.  a  hand  moved  to  the  wall  to  support  herself,  eyes  on  the  figure  in  front  of  her.      /     @webslings​    ⧗

[natuska-a]

steve rogers / libertasis​.

⍟･ﾟ:* —  @natuska​​ ,

𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬,  onboard the chimera, hands clasped behind his back. his gear strapped to his body, but not fully. helmet was missing, sitting atop his bed — the shield waiting by the door. five years had just went and gone by without him.  [ 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘥𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘪𝘹𝘵𝘺-𝘴𝘪𝘹. ]  and again, he was having to readjust, to learn and adapt and move on. he hears the door to his room slide open, but he doesn’t turn around, by footsteps alone … he was able to tell who it was.

❛ hey … i never got the chance to thank you. ❜  he turns his head slightly, just to look over his shoulder at her. his head turned just enough, to see the corners of his lips curve upwards into a soft smile.  ❛ for keeping my things. even when you all thought i was gone — ❜  some items in this room, could never be replaced.  [ 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘮𝘦. 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵, 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘦’𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦𝘥. ]  ❛ though, i think a few of my books are missing. has thor been going through my things? ❜  he lightly chuckles, now turning to face her fully and pulls his arms around from his back, dropping them instead by his side.

she  still  hadn’t  come  to  terms  with  everything  that  had  happened.  there  was  still  the  endless,  intrusive  thought  in  her  mind  that  she  had  missed  steve  right  under  her  nose  for  so  many  years.  if  she  had  overturned  one  more  file.  if  she  had  stayed  a  few  seconds  more,  eavesdropping  in  on  conversations,  maybe,  she  could’ve  found  him.  she’d  tried  to  push  them  out  of  her  mind,  but  somehow?  they’d  never  fully  go  away.  a  part  of  her  wasn’t  sure  why  she  was  heading  to  him,  but  her  feet  were  bringing  her  to  him  without  so  much  as  a  second  thought.  they’d  spent  so  long  working  by  each  other’s  sides  that  having  back  already  felt  like  there  was  a  sense  of  normalcy  once  again.  his  words  caused  a  slight  furrow  of  her  brow  before  he  continued,  a  small  smile  matching  the  one  she  could  see  rise  on  his  lips.  “ we’d  never  get  rid  of  any  of  it,  steve.  a  part  of  me  thinks  everyone  just  hoped  that...  that  maybe  you  weren’t  really  gone.”  a  beat.  “ your  stuff  was  all  we  had  left. ”

as  he  turned  to  face  her  fully,  she  managed  a  soft  chuckle,  taking  a  few  steps  further  into  his  quarters  eyes  started  to  dart  around  to  look  at  the  items  that  littered  his  space  in  a  way  that  was  completely...  steve.  “ i  took  those,  actually. ”  her  words  were  paired  with  a  small  grin,  her  meeting  his  eyes.  “ i  had  to  have  some  kind  of  entertainment,  rogers.  cleaning  my  weapons  in  my  room  can  only  keep  me  occupied  for  so  long.”  a  breath,  her  shaking  her  head  for  a  moment.  “i’ll  give  you  the  books  back,  though.  i  promise  they’re  in  perfect  condition. ”  her  body  turned  to  look  towards  his  shield,  her  smile  still  tugging  sadly  at  her  lips.  “ it  feels  right  to  see  this  back  in  here  with  you.  and  not  just  hung  up  on  a  wall  like  some  sort  of  memoir. ”  looking  to  him,  a  sigh  escaped  her.  it  had  been  so  long,  so  many  hours  spent  mourning,  spent  coming  to  terms  with  the  loss  of  someone  she’d  considered  her  partner  for  so  long.  “ steve,  i     ---------    i  couldn’t  just  let  all  of  your  stuff  disappear.  there  were  some  people  from  shield  that  wanted  to  give  it  away.  museums  and  stuff,  you  know?  but  even  if  you  were  gone,  you  still  had  a  place  on  this  ship.  i  mean,  it’s  practically  our  home,  isn’t  it? ”

[avadcniels]

WESTWORLD ⇢ 3x01

[natuska-a]

hi it’s emo hours

[natuska-a]

ayo who wants a russian assassin girlfriend, taking roll call now

[billysrussc]

i  was  the        best  version  of  myself      out  there  in  the  service.        𝙨𝙬𝙞𝙛𝙩,  𝙨𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙩,  𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙡𝙮.        we  all  were  all  of  those  things.        𝘸𝘦  𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦  𝘢  𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺,      and  we  were  fighting  for  something.  we  weren't  afraid  of  shit.  and  now…      now,  there's  something  just  on  the        𝙚𝙙𝙜𝙚𝙨  𝙤𝙛  𝙢𝙮  𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙.      it's  like  a      dark  shadow       just  waiting  for  me.  the  thing  is,  doc…   [    i  deserve  to  feel  the  fear.    ]       i  don't  know  why,  but  i  know…        i deserve this.  

[dazzlingmemes]

julien  baker’s  sprained  ankle  sentence  starters. change  pronouns/tenses  if  needed !

i  wrote  you  love  letters  and  sung  them  in  my  house.

are  you  still  proud  when  i  open  my  mouth?

wish  i  could  write  songs  about  anything  other  than  death.

i  know  myself  better  than  anybody  else.

you’re  gonna  run  when  you  find  out  who  i  am.

i  know  i’m  a  pile  of  filthy  wreckage  you  wish  you’d  never  touched.

you’re  gonna  run.   it’s  alright,   everybody  does.

i’m  trying  really  hard  to  keep  my  nose  clean.

it’s  not  easy  when  what  you  think  of  me  is  important.

i  know  it  shouldn’t  be  so  damn  important,   but  it  is  to  me.

i  know  i  shouldn’t  act  this  way  in  public.

i  know  i  shouldn’t  make  my  friends  all  worry.

i  ruin  everything  i  think  could  be  good  news.

i  knew  i  was  wasting  my  time.

whenever  i  close  my  eyes,   i’m  chasing  your  tail  lights  in  the  dark.

i  knew  you  were  gone  months  ago  but  i  can’t  think  of  anyone  else.

i  should  have  said  something,   but  i  couldn’t  find  something  to  say.

i  just  said  nothing,   sat  and  watched  you  drive  away.

i  know  i  meant  nothing  to  you.

i  thought  i  meant  something.

i  can’t  think  of  anyone  else.

give  me  everything  good,   and  i’ll  throw  it  away.

i  wish  that  i  could  quit  but  i  can’t  stand  the  shakes.

i  never  know  what  to  say.

there’s  more  whiskey  than  blood  in  my  veins.

i’m  sorry  for  asking,   but  please  come  take  me  home.

i  know  you’re  still  worried  i’m  gonna  get  scared.

i’ve  kissed  enough  bathroom  sinks  to  make  up  for  the  lovers  that  never  loved  me.

i’m  tired  of  washing  my  hands.

god,   i  wanna  go  home.

[natuska-a]

thinkin abt this today

[notahammer]

Up here, it’s quite warm. Like the summertime. Like the summertimes with my parents. Good times. Or it could have been, anyway.

Black Widow #16 [Noto, Edmondson]