𝒊 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 𝒃𝒆 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈.

[ncblehell]

Character Development Questions: Hard Mode ;  How does your character normally deal with confrontation? 

he doesn’t. he is not good with confrontation at all. when he is put into that kind of situation, he goes quiet, bites his nails, legs jump. it was the same he developed when he had to see doctors over and over again, the more he had to face the more uncomfortable he got. he gets his words jumped and tends to talk with a lisp and stutters a whole lot. ever since he was kid he had these things, just everything started to pan out, but when he has to be confronted about something, its never good. he gets so anxious he has a hard time explaining things --- though he can confront someone else? but when its reverse he shuts down and hates it because it brings back horrible memories.

he is all sorts of fucked up in his head, though, if his alters get switched he can be perfectly calm when talking to someone about stuff. there is a whole process that i am still working on with him, and its gotten a lot better over time!

[ncblehell]

Character Development Questions: Hard Mode  ;     In what situation was your character the most calm they’ve ever been? 

he masks / neglects his emotions very well since things started to go in a better direction for him. for spencer, when he plays piano or violin he is the most calm. he gets lost in the music -- this is why he is a music producer. he can just stay calm, not worry about a thing, but its also very dangerous on his health because sometimes he can forget to eat, or feed when he is in his studio working on things he’s done or for others. music is his passion. he loves music and working on things for friends. he can just get lost in the music. playing violin and piano has been in his life for such a long time that he would be so lost if he didn’t have that in his life.

being on stage and just performing is also another thing he absolutely finds calming. no matter how hectic it can be, he finds his place there in front of a crowed and loves putting on a good show for others. he does his best.

“what am i and what is my life without music or producing music for others?”  

he tries, and that’s what matters and when he does something good for his life he will show it to the world and only grow higher with every great accomplishment.

[ncblehell]

Character Development Questions: Hard Mode  ;   Does your character have recurring themes in their dreams? 

sleep, dreaming, anything has just ..... stopped at some points in his life. especially when it comes to mental disorders that spencer currently has. even with the medications he has, the sleeping pills, he finds it hard to fall asleep and get rest. he works through the night on tracks, sending things out and making sure things are in order. but when he gets tired enough, like really really drop dead tired he will end up sleeping peacefully just do not disturb him he will bite.

when it comes to themes in his dreams, they are pretty different though sometimes, he can have one or two of the same dream. honestly when he dreams a lot of the time its memories and broken memories ---- his brain trying to piece together what it lost when he went down the heavy drugs and drinking stage of his life. dreams are also more like nightmares when it comes to spencer. ptsd, anxiety, it all comes at him at once ; reasons why he much rather just not sleep because he doesn’t want to remember. he doesn’t want to THINK ---- always working to keep his mind elsewhere and for the longest time its been like this.

slowly, however, as time goes on he gets little cat naps here and there, and he is still very aware of his surroundings and where he is at and they normally don’t last long at all. not long enough to give him terrors.

[ncblehell]

TO BE A PUREBRED ; A PUREBLOOD,  VAMPIRES HAD TO HAVE BEEN IN EXISTENCE ALREADY ---------

VAMPIRE: the living dead, night walkers, bloodsuckers, etc. however that was not always the case. vampire is a curse done upon apollo himself out of pure jealously over the woman selena.to a very human traveler named ambrogio. apollo cursed the man so his skin would burn when touched by sunlight. the man then later turned to hades and it was artemis that helped, with other attributes that we know today. ( strength, speed, fangs to kill beasts, etc. )

spencer’s family, being the first noted family of real vampires started with his mother and father, common vampires that had drank the blood of selene and ambrogio ; they had no real significance to them, just your common vampire with your normal attributes to them, hunger, strength, speed, but the twist? they didn’t have to die to turn. it was just the blood they drank to give them these gifts.

they blended in life perfectly, after making a deal with the devil. they were able to survive in the sunlight and mina, spencer’s mother was gifted a gift. to pass onto her offspring. what mina should have known was to never make a deal with the devil for deals always come with a price.

it was the beginning of the goryeo dynasty ( 918 ) where the lee family was due a heir; min and sungmi were proud parents of a healthy baby boy ( so they were under the impression by anyways ) lee mijun. who would grow to be the prince of the vampire family. born as a pureblooded vampire. the rarest breed of vampire.

PUREBLOOD: the heritage of these vampires haven't been diluted by human blood. they are the strongest type of vampires and have the most significant powers, and can destroy any lower vampire with ease. vampires that are also able to walk in the sun without any sort of protection.

being born with the special gift passed on from mina when she made that deal with the devil, the gift of fire;  mijun would have to learn to control it. its the special ability that he has that labels him as an aristocrat ( also part of the nobility chain of vampire )

spencer lee was born as the FIRST and most RARE of his kind of purebred vampires. his family the FIRST to become.

[ncblehell]

TRIGGER WARNINGS : MENTAL ILLNESS, DRUGS, ALCOHOL, ABUSE, ETC

Spencer Black may seem like he is all put together but its just a facade that he played for so long it seems real. Spencer been mentally ill since a young age. Having cluster B personality disorder, mixed Body dysmorphic disorder. He is a million times fucked up, and when Alastor joined in it took a toll on him that ruined him a little bit.

When he was younger, his father wasn’t the best to him. Would yell, hit, did a lot of things to cause him more problems. Especially when it came to his illnesses, his mother, however, was one of the best things in his life. Keeping him as stable as she could she did what she could. She knew Spencer was special from day one and that’s where his love for music came in. After bad nights, or even during. It worked for a while, but it seemed his symptoms got worse until he had to be seen and sent away to a mental hospital. Where he spent most of his life. Its where he gained Ripper ( Alastor ) as his protector, to help him through. It caused him more problems to face.

Between struggling with his own issues with his gift, going up and down with his weight, just so he could have his own image right, he had to deal with the demon inside of his head. Thankfully, while he was in the mental hospital, or whatever it was called way back when, there were outlets; Spencer taking up on piano and violin to sooth his head over. To keep Alastor’s annoying voice out of his head for as long as he could seeing as his medication wasn’t working.

When he finally got out of the mental hospital, he they thought he was well enough he was well into his adult years. Twenty - Five to be exact. ( Normally the year his breed of vampire stopped growing  ) He wasn’t completely sane, but Alastor allowed him his medication to work, to help him and he was finally showing progress. It was a blessing in disguise he didn’t kill everyone there with his lack of blood he needed to contain himself. ( Again needing to put it all on Alastor. It was always the safest route to take ) Getting back home, he found things packed up and letters from his mother. He needed to be on his own from the looks of it.

Sure Spencer still has his break downs but not so much now as it was then before. Especially with black outs when Ripper would take over and ride his body for a little bit. Ripper did this, only so he could be out of Purgatory and living in his head was the best way to also do what he wanted. Getting Spencer into a bunch of drugs and alcohol, leading to moments of almost getting caught by the police, which in case he was able to get out of quiet easily. The drugs and alcohol messed Spencer up further.

He was an addict, he couldn’t stop it even if he wanted to, awake or with Alastor riding him like a damn puppet, it was bad for years. Sleeping around with men and women, and making his face known for all the wrong reasons. But with all the parities and drinking, it somehow fixed his problem for the most part and he wanted to keep doing it. It felt good. It get high, to drink, to forget. Forget about all the times he was abused, for all the times he was left alone. But the high only lasted so long before he was right back up being depressed, trying to kill himself in the worst ways possible.

NOTHING WORKED. HE WAS TRAPPED.

Piano, and violin were both forgotten. It was a century he much rather forget then keep living. Going through rehab, getting himself back on the proper medications, Spencer cleaned himself up, but the body image disorder lingers in his head. He barely wanted to look at himself. What he was doing. He needed to change how he was.

Trying to make himself poised and refined as much as possible once he was straight, He bought the expense. He had the money from family so why not? It was another addiction. One he much rather have then pick up the needle.

This is long and I know but its worth it to know things beforehand. Anywho ~~~

Spencer spends countless hours trying to get himself perfect. Let it be the night before, or the peak hours of the morning. He needs to be perfect. Proving his father wrong, and now the heir of the family. It works out fine. He was fine. Voices stopped, medication is good. And now that Alastor was out of his head finally he can pick up things that he once loved to do.

He still has minor episodes, because he is not COMPLETELY healed and never will be healed of his mental illnesses. he has moments of multiple personalities. It lingers from Ripper. Sometimes the mask comes off and the facade fades away where he has to be completely shut out or he could ruin what he has going for him. When this happens he turns to music, trying old methods and thankfully they work more and more. Piano really soothes him.

He has many triggers, but tries to block a lot of it out so he could be in the real world. One way is he picked up smoking. These small things help him, and he is very helpful he now can see Alastor and have him around to keep him in the right track ( even though sometimes its not always the right one and Alastor tends to do his own thing causing him grief ) in the end there is help and Spencer shows progress each day.

Now the mask is stronger and his problems are less apparent then they were before and living in Seoul, South Korea is one of the better choices he and Alastor ever made.

[ncblehell]

            PURE BLOODED VAMPIRE, AN ARISTOCRAT.

He was born of royal blood, of pure blood, a true vampire —- his parents royalty and he, an aristocrat. Meaning he had a special gift like most of his age and caliber. Just adding to the darkness of his head. Causing it to go off the wire even more. Trying to conceal his gift, he worked hard, and buried himself in a few holes throughout his life.

HIS GIFT. FIRE.

Sure, fire is supposed to be something that vampires hate, but being around as long as he has been, with the gifts Spencer has, you wont be scared of fire. He can manipulate it, control it, cast it, and a lot more then that. Being a pure blooded vampire, and an aristocrat, other tend to be bow down. It was not exactly what he wanted to deal with so in some ways he was thankful for the fact he had Ripper in the back of his head, but in some ways he was not. He didn’t care for all the blood shed, he was falling and falling, and loosing his control.

HE HAD TO LEARN ALL OVER AGAIN HOW TO CONTROL THE FLAME.

Growing up with his gift was a pain in itself but adding demons to the situation, that was even harder. Learning all over again, and there were times it would be heightened. But he did eventually get control, his gift now useful for certain things. However, he just wants to be able to make friends with other vampires without having fake friends after his title for right now, his title is nothing more then that until he proves himself to his long line of family that he is worth it, that he can take on the responsibilities.