TRIGGER WARNINGS : MENTAL ILLNESS, DRUGS, ALCOHOL, ABUSE, ETC
Spencer Black may seem like he is all put together but its just a facade that he played for so long it seems real. Spencer been mentally ill since a young age. Having cluster B personality disorder, mixed Body dysmorphic disorder. He is a million times fucked up, and when Alastor joined in it took a toll on him that ruined him a little bit.
When he was younger, his father wasnโt the best to him. Would yell, hit, did a lot of things to cause him more problems. Especially when it came to his illnesses, his mother, however, was one of the best things in his life. Keeping him as stable as she could she did what she could. She knew Spencer was special from day one and thatโs where his love for music came in. After bad nights, or even during. It worked for a while, but it seemed his symptoms got worse until he had to be seen and sent away to a mental hospital. Where he spent most of his life. Its where he gained Ripper ( Alastor ) as his protector, to help him through. It caused him more problems to face.
Between struggling with his own issues with his gift, going up and down with his weight, just so he could have his own image right, he had to deal with the demon inside of his head. Thankfully, while he was in the mental hospital, or whatever it was called way back when, there were outlets; Spencer taking up on piano and violin to sooth his head over. To keep Alastorโs annoying voice out of his head for as long as he could seeing as his medication wasnโt working.
When he finally got out of the mental hospital, he they thought he was well enough he was well into his adult years. Twenty - Five to be exact. ( Normally the year his breed of vampire stopped growing ย ) He wasnโt completely sane, but Alastor allowed him his medication to work, to help him and he was finally showing progress. It was a blessing in disguise he didnโt kill everyone there with his lack of blood he needed to contain himself. ( Again needing to put it all on Alastor. It was always the safest route to take ) Getting back home, he found things packed up and letters from his mother. He needed to be on his own from the looks of it.
Sure Spencer still has his break downs but not so much now as it was then before. Especially with black outs when Ripper would take over and ride his body for a little bit. Ripper did this, only so he could be out of Purgatory and living in his head was the best way to also do what he wanted. Getting Spencer into a bunch of drugs and alcohol, leading to moments of almost getting caught by the police, which in case he was able to get out of quiet easily. The drugs and alcohol messed Spencer up further.
He was an addict, he couldnโt stop it even if he wanted to, awake or with Alastor riding him like a damn puppet, it was bad for years. Sleeping around with men and women, and making his face known for all the wrong reasons. But with all the parities and drinking, it somehow fixed his problem for the most part and he wanted to keep doing it. It felt good. It get high, to drink, to forget. Forget about all the times he was abused, for all the times he was left alone. But the high only lasted so long before he was right back up being depressed, trying to kill himself in the worst ways possible.
NOTHING WORKED. HE WAS TRAPPED.
Piano, and violin were both forgotten. It was a century he much rather forget then keep living. Going through rehab, getting himself back on the proper medications, Spencer cleaned himself up, but the body image disorder lingers in his head. He barely wanted to look at himself. What he was doing. He needed to change how he was.
Trying to make himself poised and refined as much as possible once he was straight, He bought the expense. He had the money from family so why not? It was another addiction. One he much rather have then pick up the needle.
This is long and I know but its worth it to know things beforehand. Anywho ~~~
Spencer spends countless hours trying to get himself perfect. Let it be the night before, or the peak hours of the morning. He needs to be perfect. Proving his father wrong, and now the heir of the family. It works out fine. He was fine. Voices stopped, medication is good. And now that Alastor was out of his head finally he can pick up things that he once loved to do.
He still has minor episodes, because he is not COMPLETELY healed and never will be healed of his mental illnesses. he has moments of multiple personalities. It lingers from Ripper. Sometimes the mask comes off and the facade fades away where he has to be completely shut out or he could ruin what he has going for him. When this happens he turns to music, trying old methods and thankfully they work more and more. Piano really soothes him.
He has many triggers, but tries to block a lot of it out so he could be in the real world. One way is he picked up smoking. These small things help him, and he is very helpful he now can see Alastor and have him around to keep him in the right track ( even though sometimes its not always the right one and Alastor tends to do his own thing causing him grief ) in the end there is help and Spencer shows progress each day.
Now the mask is stronger and his problems are less apparent then they were before and living in Seoul, South Korea is one of the better choices he and Alastor ever made.