trispamgle

tri ▪︎ (she/her)

[the-muppet-joker]

Imagine working as a clown, and you're absolutely bombing your performance. You're juggling your balls all over the floor, you're slipping on your own little clown props, you're honking your little nose without even meaning to. And no one is laughing. There's only one person in the audience. His clown makeup is far more handsom than yours. His purple suit is tight, leaving nothing to the imagination. He green hair. The Joker walks over, leans over your frail clown body, sneering. "Not very funny," he chuckles darkly. You honk meekly, presenting your Clown Hole in submission as you are overwhelmed by his superior clown pheromones and musk. And then. And then he pulls it out. He pulls out his j

[qcharlie]

i wish we were able to talk about women's rights without someone mentioning how much they do or don't want to have sex with them. i don't care if you're a lesbian Stop finding worth in women purely from their perceived attractiveness

[qcharlie]

"I think women should not be expected to shave for societal respect / to avoid discrimination" "yeah🤤 i love bush" ok well that's not what we're talking about is it.

[qcharlie]

i hate how many posts about trans women deserving respect always devolve into "I love girldick" or "trans rights but I don't want to date a trans person" because that's entirely unrelated to the topic at hand. you should not respond to feminism with "YESSS I loveeee you because I see you as nothing but a sex object" you people sound like other men I get stuck talking with that end up saying "free the nipple so I can see boobies in public" and thinking they're feminists. why can't we just respect women regardless of your attraction to them or not. why does it need to be brought up in every conversation regarding their rights

[drtanner]

An awful lot of people seem to think that being asked to afford basic rights and dignity to people [read: women and queers, because this never seems to apply to cishet men] is the same as being told that they have to find those people sexually attractive! Apparently treating people you wouldn't fuck like human beings equal to yourself is an alien and offensive concept to some. Those people need to get better or die. 💜

All of which is to say: this applies to fat women, also.

[dahlia-molinas]

if christopher nolan was really the visionary and ground-breaking director everyone claims he is he would have cast ben affleck as penelope

[transfemininomenon]

the phrase really should be "eat your cake and have it too" im with the unabomber on this one

[everydaylouie]

short kings

[the-muppet-joker]

More like Kermit the SLUT put some CLOTHES on you saucy little PERVERT

[legofemme]

Shitty comic day i didnt forget you this year

[legofemme]

Reblogs r back on so BEHAVE.

[lesbiannieism]

anyway in case you didn’t notice franco drove an incredible race, passed his teammate, and finished TEN PLACES ahead of where he qualified 🐐

[the-muppet-joker]

Tump dies tonight while giving his speech in the hot hot sun. Like to charge, reblog to cast

[mini-wrants]

Outdoor in sun perfec t place for president to do speech! Outdoor very warm very soft put old man on green lawn under sun. Put old man in warm sun. no problem ever in warm sun because good view and audience can see long speech. Nice podium outdoor sunny perfect place for old president can trust warm sun to give nice view to President good luck to President. friend sun.

[spiribia]

It probably is kind of fun to be a parent bird and find big fat bugs to put in your child’s goalpost mouth. And the more you do it the larger your baby gets, which shows your progress. Mine is reaally big, think I’m going to get a high score this time. It has a unique skin too, I’ve never even seen this one before. Has anyone gotten that one, dark brown and white belly with stripes? It’s not even in my Wrenpedia, it has to be a really special unlock

[enba-and-luka]

[lateleviathan]

THIS IS NOT THE END OF STOPKILLINGGAMES

THERE'S A WAY TO BYPASS THE COMMISSION AND PEOPLE ARE ALREADY WORKING ON IT

[roguesynapses]

Tldw; there is majority support in the European Parliament for a bill that would cover most of SKG's issues, and if passed this would bypass the decision of the Commission. There are also ongoing lawsuits in France and other places that would likely lead to some legislation. There is also a bill being worked on in California that wouldn't stop current games from being killed, but would stop future games from being killed

[delusional-safety-carr]

Here to share our vision helloooooooooooo!!!

[dilfosaur]

cursed by a witch that if i don't post a dilf on fathers day i d*e

[that-bird-you-know]

The birds to bugs pipeline is real I used to hate insects now I see one and go “oooooo who are you” the same way I do with a bird

[the-muppet-joker]

If I was a muppet would you use your superior size and strength to hold me down? Mm, pin me by the back of my neck while I squirm and flail? I'm trying to tell jokes about the situation, as I am an object of entertainment by nature, but I'm stammering and tripping over my words as your fingers dance around the edge of my muppet hole. Ah, it's starting to self-lubricate. The audience is laughing. Are you going to put your hand in? Make me dance? I can't breathe. I miss my wife

[the-muppet-joker]

On the topic of seam ripper play in erotic muppet fanfiction, I also just kind of wish I was made of a material that someone else could gently rip apart at the edges and reshape me in a some sort of different arrangement. God made me in his own divine image but I am not divine and divinity burns me. I see the people who have pulled at their own threads and made themselves into something really beautiful, and I see them nod at each other in solidarity and understanding, but they do not see me as I silently scream to them from the ground. I am an unmoving puppet and I need another's hands to grant me permission to become myself. I am trapped in a body that burns me and I lack both the hands to undo its seams and the mouth to cry out in pain. I do not know how to stop smiling. Man you KNOW the muppets got sooo freaky backstage