the heart is an arrow

she/her

[sinistra-orlok]

[we-all-got-scars-again]

IT’S MARCH

[multifand0mtrash]

[magical-awesome-kid]

Uh… It’s still May…

[clowncare]

[normalstuffidk]

It’s august

[storm-driver]

[parkchanwoohoo]

The facial expressions of everyone trying not to lose it are killing me

[gunsandfireandshit]

This is painfully American

[dirtbaby2016]

Americans be like it is totally normal for an entire stadium (including military members) to stand at attention while a fast food clown mascot sings the national anthem

[unstablebill]

when we say "it is functionally impossible to parody Americans in a way that will actually insult them" this is the sort of thing you're up against. is your sick burn funnier than corporation burger clown sing national anthem baseball game? no?? of course it isn't.

[toskarinfr]

[princessslea]

Using this as a spell to keep tumblr alive at least until this post is accurate

[memeuplift]

[mossspores]

life if comes fucks me

[orcarriagesthatwork]

I think about this cake every day

[tizzymcwizzy]

sorry for exposing your tags but this is hilarious

[microsuedemouse]

OP, I hope you don’t mind me making an addition:

When I turned 17, we ordered a cake at the grocery store for my party, as we’d done many times before. If you wanted something written on the cake you’d write it into a section of the order form. We requested, very simply, “Happy Birthday Courtney”. When we went to pick it up the day of the party, this is what we got.

The bakery employees had absolutely no explanation for this. The order form, attached to the box, very clearly did not contain any of those extra names. Whomever had done the writing was no longer in, so there was no one to ask how this had happened. The fact that the name ‘Juan’ is misspelled bewilders me to this day. (I’ve never seen ‘Miley’ without the E, either, but it’s believable that someone might spell it that way.) Did this cake slip in from an alternate universe where I’m one quarter of a set of Hispanic quadruplets? Dyslexic Hispanic quadruplets, maybe?

This cake became the focal point of my party. At least two of my friends regularly called me ‘Courtney Mily Jaun Pablo’ for years to come. My siblings and I still reference it sometimes, eleven years later. It is probably the funniest thing ever to occur at any birthday celebration of my life, and may well remain so for the rest of my days.

I love a botched cake.

[helenarth]

one time me and some pals spotted one of those big cookie cakes in a store. it was done up with red icing and little X's for kisses and in the middle it said

No One Like You

now, it took us a while to realise it meant "(there is) no one like you". at first, we all parsed it as a botched "no one like(s) you"

for ages after when we'd wind each other up we'd declare "NO ONE LIKE YOU ☹️👎"

[itseasytoremember]

I just feel like it's important to post the Sacred Texts

[shofarsogood]

[bioluminescent-fungus]

affirmations when opening a stuck jar:

I am stronger than the jar

⁠⁠I know what left and right are

⁠⁠smashing the jar will make a mess

⁠⁠I have strong and dextrous hands

⁠⁠I have opened jars before and I will open jars again

[cutshaw]

every couple of years there's a new superhero movie that will have many people telling you "no I know marvel is bad but this one is different, it's really good!" stay vigilant. it's gonna be bad

[warren-keplers-funk-band]

you have NO idea what the charlie gillespie as troy barrett casting news is doing to us julie and the phantoms fans. i feel like a sleeper agent

[stardustpainter]

Ilya trying to outplay his demons

[swagophile]

me in a heist movie scenario: [right about to execute the big plan] i hope you guys kbow if this plan goes south i'm killing myself

driver: what

me: alright team. we kbow our roles. lets get to it

demolitions expert: wait can we go back to that thing earlier

grifter: yeah what was that about

me: charlie, i want you to take point. you're the most important for the early phase so you gotta make sure to nail this. remember we only have a limited time to pull this off, so the sooner the better

safecracker: youre not really gonna kill yourself if we fuck this up right

me: [putting on my badass sunglasses as smooth bossa nova music plays] i'm definitely going to kill myself if we get this wrong

[dahlia-molinas]

btw none of the upcoming projects for the next five years have female protagonists in the mcu. btw.

[cheesegoblin04]

Wasn't sure about the purple shading

[cutecipher]

there's art inside me trying to get out

[snoopylovessoup]

I love you, day and night

[smokingrozanov]

Being part of a fandom is like being a barnacle on the side of a ship. In a way.

[academic-vampire]

A crucial part of the bookstore experience is saying hi to all the books you’ve already read

[steggydaily]

Chris Evans and Hayley Atwell - SDCC 2026