I DO NOT DO NSFW !!! At All !!! I will draw nudity however. Also Furries are Hard for me to draw so if you . ask me for a furry you're agreeing to the potential risk that it looks Bad.
All prices are for ONE character. For however many additional ones, it's adding half the base price. (If you buy a bust sketch for 2 characters, itd be 1.5$, basically.)
walks in here with my clown shoes squeaking. your barfight fic has immediately made me irreparably insane and if you would perhaps be interested in writing more for them i would owe you my full heart and soul (more than i already do).
perhaps jacob finding out more about julian’s past treatment after a bad trigger — someone else, a nightmare, or maybe jacob himself accidentally triggering him. but ofc no worries if it doesn’t strike your fancy 🙂↔️
Oh, this strikes my fancy :3
I went with a nightmare cuz Julian has them in the script. I sound like a “erm, actually, in the comics” person 😭
Jacob is a major sweetie and Julian is starting to open up to him… Somehow they work!
Btw, keep your heart and soul, you need that stuff, I hear 🙂↕️
Jacob woke up to the bed shaking next to him. It wasn't an earthquake or anything, this was too small.
Also… there was a quiet sound with the shaking. Crying. There was crying next to him.
When was the last time Jacob had someone crying next to him? Let alone in bed?
"Julian?" Jacob murmured, realizing that the only person who'd be beside him in bed was Julian.
Julian stopped moving and the crying cut off. "Sorry," He whispered, voice quivering. "Just give me a minute."
Jacob wiped his eyes and reached for the bedside lamp. He clicked the light on, and a soft, warm yellow light blanketed the bedroom.
He sat up in bed and looked over at Julian. The man was hunched over the side of the bed, holding a tissue to his face to over his eyes, hiding his tears.
Jacob shuffled to sit behind Julian's back, but hesitated to reach out to him. "What happened?" He asked instead, hoping Julian would open up or relax soon.
"Dream," Julian said stiffly. He wiped his face down with the tissue and cleared his throat. Jacob watched as he threw the tissue into the trash and put his head in his hands.
"A nightmare, you mean," Jacob whispered. He pulled himself forward to sit beside Julian, hoping that not being behind him would help him relax.
Julian sighed and nodded into his hands. "I guess."
Jacob hummed. He wasn't sure what he should do or say. Julian was… fragile, in a sense, after a bad episode. The man had never explained his anxieties or fears to Jacob, and Jacob had never pried. He feared that Julian would shut down or run away if he did, and so he zipped his lips.
But. Julian had never cried before. He'd look like he was on the cusp of a breakdown, sure, but he'd never cried. At least not in front of Jacob. Which means this time must be incredibly bad and exhausting.
"Wanna talk about it?" Jacob offered, leaving the door open for anything. Julian could pick the path forward in this conversation, and Jacob would go along with it.
Julian shrugged. There was a minute of silence, only the sound of Julian breathing deeply into his hands filling the room, until the man pulled his head up from his hands. He rested his chin on his now clasped hands and looked forward.
He couldn't look at Jacob right now. Not for this conversation. Jacob deserved to know something. Anything about Julian. He's done too much to go unrewarded for his undying kindness.
"My mom," Julian whispered. "It's always her in my dreams."
Jacob's eyes widened. Seems they may have something in common. Jacob remained silent, but sat stiffly as he waited for Julian to continue.
Julian closed his eyes for a moment, trying to remain calm. "She… hurt me," He confessed. He couldn't say anything else; word anything that had happened to him the right way. He just couldn't say what exactly she'd done to him, it was too painful. Too much of an open wound still.
So, for now, Jacob would have to be okay with only hearing this small confession from him.
Jacob watched Julian breathe in, open his eyes, and then start to cry again. The tears tracked down his face silently, his eyes glistening and lip pulled between his teeth. "Oh, Julian," Jacob whispered, heart breaking.
Julian dropped his head back down into his hands and sobbed as quietly as he could. Jacob pushed himself closer to Julian and grabbed the blanket that had covering the bed. He laid it over Julian's shoulders and wrapped him up in it tightly.
Jacob hoped the soft material and firm pressure would help him relax. He also wanted a barrier for Julian to rely on so he could rest a hand on the man's upper back to comfort him as he cried.
"It's not your fault," Jacob whispered as he rubbed circles into Julian's back. The man stiffened at his words and then shook his head furiously.
"It is," Julian choked out. He wiped his eyes and looked at Jacob. His eyes were red and he looked absolutely sure of what he'd just said.
"No, it isn't." Jacob shook his head and stilled his hand on Julian's back. "I know it feels like it is… but it's not."
Julian turned his face away and leaned forward to grab another tissue from the bedside table. He wiped his face again but kept the tissue in a clenched fist. Jacob thought maybe he'd respond, fight for his mother's honor, but no, Julian just looked down at the floor blankly instead.
Jacob sighed. "You've had these nightmares your entire life, haven't you?" He had nightmares and intrusive thoughts about his own mother, so his tone wasn't pitying like other people's would be.
Julian seemed to recognize the understanding in Jacob's voice and looked up at him again, eyes empathetic. "Yes," He nodded and cleared his throat. "As long as I can remember."
Jacob nodded. "I have nightmares about my mother on and off… for years now. More so after my father died."
Julian sat back on the bed, back unhunching and relaxed his hold on the tissue. "Your dad was good to you?" He asked Jacob hopefully. He wanted Jacob to have at least one good parent, unlike him.
Jacob smiled sadly. "He was so kind and giving… she walked all over him." He moved his hand to Julian's shoulder. "After he died, she got… worse, somehow. More bitter, I guess."
Julian leaned into Jacob's hand and tossed the tissue in the trash. "Directed it at you, huh?" He already knew what the answer would be, but it felt good to find commonality and talk about it with someone.
"Yeah," Jacob looked down at the floor. "She got mean and controlling. Had a hard time not hearing her in my head every second… for a long, long time." Jacob took a breath and rubbed Julian's shoulder. "Just needed to find the right people to lean on."
Julian's eyes widened and he cracked a smile before ducking his head. "Yeah…" He murmured to himself.
Jacob patted his shoulder and then shuffled fully onto the bed again. "Try and lie down for a bit?"
Julian hummed and threw the blanket back over the bed. He got under the covers beside Jacob and took a deep breath.
"Thank you," He whispered and laid his hand between them, palm up.
Jacob shut the lamp off and then rolled over to lace their fingers together. "You're welcome."
Julian relaxed into the bed as Jacob stroked the side of his hand with a thumb.
He was eternally grateful for Jacob's patience and love… He'll need to find a way to repay him for this, too.
This is definitely not just because I headcanon them as childhood friends… but I’d love to see another Jacob/Julian thing 👀👀👀 possibly like Julian moving to the states post-ogf and running into Jacob who can just tell he’s been through hell and needs someone to support him
— 🦊
Jumped at the opportunity to write them more. Julian is going to have to really let Jacob in before being open and honest with him whatsoever.
I tried to keep it in character, but damn, it was hard sometimes. Enjoy! Word Count: 2369
Julian wandered through the mall, going in and out of stores without buying anything because nothing caught his attention. He needed to buy some clothes now that he was moved back to the States, and had put off the chore for as long as possible… until he ran out of clean clothes.
Julian had gone to get his laundry cleaned, returned his cleaned clothes to his apartment before leaving to buy more— which left him wandering a mall.
He hadn't taken much when he left Thailand, just the necessities, really, but he couldn't exactly complain when he was still somehow alive. Julian had gotten away from his sins with his life, and the forgiveness of his chosen God. He should feel at peace now, but he didn't. Sure, he was more relaxed than he'd ever been all of his life, but the crushing weight of guilt and anguish still weighed heavily on his mind— on his soul.
When Julian walked through a store selling dress shirts and pants that caught his eye, someone started walking up to him from the corner of his vision. He didn't turn towards the person but tensed instinctively, waiting for a fight.
"Julian?" The man asked him as he stopped to stand next to Julian.
Julian's eyes widened at his name being known at all and turned towards the man. He scanned the man from head to toe but didn't recognize anything about him. "I'm sorry?" Julian ended up saying quietly. He figured when he'd gotten back to the States that he'd have to get more used to speaking to strangers— Americans loved to talk, dear God.
The man shook his head to himself. "Sorry, should introduce myself first," He said and held a hand out. "Jacob Palmer."
Julian turned fully towards Jacob and shook his hand. "Jacob," He whispered. "Jacob..."
He remembered Jacob. The man before him had been his one friend and light in his life as a child. Jacob may actually be the reason Julian had any happy memories of his childhood.
Jacob smiled and pulled his hand away. "Yeah, been a while, huh?" He tilted his head at Julian when the man didn't reply. "You… how's everything?"
Julian looked down at the floor. What a loaded question… and Jacob didn't even realize it. He finally forced himself to shrug in response and watched Jacob deflate.
"Wanna grab something to eat?" Jacob asked hesitantly.
Julian glanced around the store, heart racing and feeling almost trapped at the moment, but nodded. Jacob looked him over, eyes full of worry, before turning towards the entrance of the store with Julian following close behind.
They walked silently to the food court and Jacob paid for a pizza, denying Julian's silent request to pay when he pulled out his wallet. They sat down in a quieter area of the mall and started eating.
Julian took slow, small bites while Jacob devoured the pizza like a man starved. He kept throwing glances at Julian, brows knitted together, but didn't say anything.
Julian finished his first slice when Jacob started his third. "Sorry," Jacob mumbled suddenly. "Shoulda realized that was a dumb question."
Julian sat there, still and quiet, as he absorbed Jacob's words. The man just apologized to him. For making him uncomfortable. What the fuck?
"It's okay," Julian whispered back and took another slice, just to have something to fidget with.
Jacob looked relieved that Julian had accepted his apology and kept eating. They'd— mostly Jacob— finished the pizza and Jacob tossed away the empty box. "You're looking for clothes, right?"
Julian nodded with a blink and Jacob started listing stores he liked going to. When he finished, he waited for Julian to pick a place to go to, and then pulled Julian in the direction of the store he'd picked.
Julian looked down at the hand wrapped around his forearm, wondering why Jacob was pretending to know or care about him when he was really a stranger.
Jacob helped his shop and pick out clothes, entire outfits, too, and paid for everything despite Julian's vocal protests. "I have more than enough money," He said to Julian each time he tensed or looked concerned when Jacob took his wallet out.
Julian carried his bags out of the mall, Jacob walking with him, but Jacob laid a hand on his shoulder. It was a light touch, hesitant. "You got a car?" He asked Julian.
Damn, Jacob and his observational skills. No, Julian did not have a car… yet.
Julian shook his head, looking sheepish. "Come on, then," Jacob told Julian and started walking through the parking lot towards his car. "I'll drive you home."
Julian felt overwhelmed by his generosity but said nothing as he clambered into the car. His bags of clothing were in the trunk and Jacob turned to make sure Julian had his seatbelt on before pulling out of the parking lot.
Julian told Jacob his address and fidgeted with the armrest of the door. "How'd you know it was me?" He finally asked.
Jacob glanced over at him. "Could just tell," He shrugged. "Got the same slit through your eyebrow and you stand the same way."
Julian touched his eyebrow as he looked at the side of Jacob's face. "…How have you been?" Julian asked timidly. Jacob deserved to have Julian put effort into this conversation, even if it felt painful to speak… It was the least Julian could do in return for Jacob's kindness.
"Been okay," Jacob nodded with a soft smile. "Met some good people… they showed me that there was more to life than just existing."
Julian's eyes widened. "Oh. Nice," He whispered. He didn't want to pry, but Jacob seemed so calm and friendly— not that he hadn't expected that, it was just… different— just like when they were kids.
Jacob talked about the Weavers for a bit, telling Julian story after story about them— especially the kids. Julian watched Jacob's smile turn bright and truly happy as he kept talking about the Weavers, and felt himself relax with the attention off him.
They pulled up in front of Julian's apartment building and Jacob parked. Julian turned to him, bouncing his leg as he debated with himself.
"Wanna come in?" Julian asked. Jacob had already done so much for him, Julian just wanted to repay him in some way.
Jacob tapped the steering wheel before nodding. "Sure, lemme just park the car."
Jacob pulled the car into a spot near the building and they both got out, making sure to grab Julian's clothes, and walked to the entrance of the building. Jacob opened the door for Julian because his hands were full and then followed him inside, letting Julian take the lead saying that this was his home.
They took the elevator up and Julian set down his bags in front of the door and unlocked it. Jacob followed him inside and slipped off his shoes when he saw Julian take off his.
Julian set the bags down on the kitchen counter, off to the side, and wondered what the hell he was supposed to do with Jacob in his home. Jacob was going to ask questions, it was inevitable. Everyone asked questions or looked at Julian like he was dirt— He understood why.
Jacob walked into the kitchen and looked around. The apartment was pretty bare, almost exactly the way Julian had brought it. Julian had always been a minimalistic person, but this felt different. He caught Julian's eye and sat down on the stool in front of the counter. Julian was standing on the other side, running over the countertop, nervous.
Jacob debated on what to say for a long time, letting their breathing be the only sound in the room for at least a minute straight. "When did you move here?" Jacob realized that might actually be the only question he could ask his former friend without causing him to shut down, so he was taking his chance.
"A week or so ago," Julian responded, glancing around his apartment and realizing how awful his home seemed to an outsider.
Jacob took that minuscule piece of information and pretended he didn't want to know more. Julian's been gone for years and now he comes back miserable and closed off like this? There's a story there Jacob might never learn about.
It was quiet for a time before Julian pushed off the counter and got Jacob a glass of water. So much for being a good host. He placed the water down in front of Jacob and the man thanked him quietly as he took a small sip. "You know anyone around here?" Jacob asked after placing the cup down on the counter.
Julian shook his head and said, "No. I…" He trailed off and Jacob looked away from Julian's face as the man fought to get the words out. "I didn't want to be known."
Jacob's face turned sad as he watched Julian duck his head, refusing to look at Jacob. Julian was good with eye contact when they were younger… wonder if something happened to change that?
"Well, you know me," Jacob replied softly. "Unless I'm so boring you have to get rid of me." He added afterwards, his voice more playful.
Julian hummed at his words and shook his head. "You're not boring," He whispered back. "You're good."
Jacob felt his chest tighten. He was glad Julian approved of him, but, damn, did his tone sound melancholy. Jacob is 'good'… which means other people weren't. That's what that meant, right?
"Julian?" Jacob finally got the courage to ask. Julian froze and looked up at Jacob, eyes full of fear and worry. "What happened?"
Julian didn't answer. He stared at the countertop with a lost look on his face, and Jacob waited for him to get back to the present. Julian finally blinked and shrugged.
Jacob bit his lip and stood from his seat, walking slowly around the counter to stand near Julian. "Julian…" He murmured sadly. "What happened?" He asked again, voice softer than before.
Julian's eyebrows pulled together as his eyes glistened with tears. He shook his head furiously, more so at himself than Jacob, and cleared his throat like that would stop his anguish. "Nothing," He croaked out.
Jacob took another step closer to him and put a hand gently on his shoulder. He left it there and felt Julian's shoulders start to shake before he sniffled. "C'mere," Jacob opened his other arm and motioned for Julian to lean into him.
Julian hesitated but when he let out a silent sob, he ducked his face down to Jacob's shoulder and wept. Jacob wrapped his arms around his friend and rubbed small, soothing circles into his back.
Julian finally brought his hands up and lightly wrapped his arms around Jacob's middle. He was hesitant to touch the man but Jacob squeezed him closer to his chest, encouraging Julian to return the hug and cry.
Julian cried softly into the fabric of Jacob's shirt and shook in Jacob's arms. Jacob was beyond worried about the man now. Julian cried when they were younger, sure, but this kind of crying? This was difficult. This felt more loaded and pained.
Jacob let him cry until he couldn't anymore, and then slowly ran a hand through the man's hair. It was short like it had been when they were kids— soft, too— and he felt Julian turn his head to be more in Jacob's hand.
Jacob finally pulled away from Julian and handed him the glass of whatever the man had gotten for him earlier. Julian took it and sipped out of it, hands shaking and eyes red.
Julian went to say something but Jacob cut him off. "Don't you dare apologize," Jacob scolded.
Julian looked down, ashamed that he'd been read so easily, and nodded. Jacob grabbed him a few tissues and Julian wiped his eyes and blew his nose, his face turning red out of embarrassment for having done this in front of someone.
Jacob pulled the man into the living room and had him sit down on the couch. He sat beside Julian and tossed the blanket Julian had thrown over the back of the couch onto the man's lap. Julian grabbed the blanket quickly and splayed it over his lap, running a hand over the soft material to calm down.
Guess Julian's love for soft things remained after all these years.
Jacob let Julian decompress after such a tiring bout of crying, and wondered who the hell had hurt his friend so badly. "Better?" Jacob asked, hand on the back of the couch.
Julian nodded faintly once as he rolled the edges of the blanket between his fingers. "Thanks," He said, voice faint.
Jacob found the TV remote and threw a nature documentary on, leaving the volume low, but loud enough that Julian could hear the words. The man next to him relaxed the longer he watched the screen, and his eyes started to droop after about half an hour.
Jacob smiled to himself, thankful that his plan to help Julian relax was working. "Get some sleep, Julian," He whispered to the man. "Want me to stay?"
Julian readjusted himself so he'd be lying down on the couch facing the TV, and pulled the blanket over him more. "Please," He replied faintly, curling up his legs and closing his eyes.
"I'll be here when you wake up," Jacob promised him.
Julian relaxed at his words and held the blanket tightly as he began falling asleep.
"I'm glad I saw you earlier," Jacob said boldly. He hoped Julian felt the same, this was going to be strange and awkward if not.
It was silent and Jacob thought Julian had fallen asleep, but then:
"Me too," Julian said into the blanket. "Thank you."
Jacob reached over and put a hand on Julian's ankle. "Don't mention it," He said and rubbed the man's ankle through the blanket.
Julian didn't move away from him, so Jacob kept his hand on him and watched the man fall asleep.
Maybe he'll get an answer as to what happened one day… this had gone better than Jacob thought it would.
Ryan Gosling + blood
1. Stay (2005) // 2. Blue Valentine (2010) // 3. Drive (2011) // 4. Only God Forgives (2013) // 5. Blade Runner 2049 (2017) // 6. The Gray Man (2022) // 7. The Fall Guy (2024) // 8. Project Hail Mary (2026)
Mortem !!! @neuroticheadline - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
