Nevernotsipping

Just keep scrolling you’re wasting ur time

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Hello, Tumblr. You alright?

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In the end, the only person you can ever really rely on is yourself 🤗

[doryy]

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Life has been rough lately.. Lots of employees lost their jobs because it’s forever winter (including me), and it’s really hard for me to get new job that actually can pay up all my bills and stuff.

Idk how long that I could hold onto.

I feel exhausted all the time..

I mean I used to deal with rejection but this time is different.

This time is just, I kinda lose myself, I feel depressed, mad, all the time, and the worst part is that I have no one to talk about this thing, because I thought that if anyone can hear my story, they all be like calling me mental and stuff u know..

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i miss my parents, i miss having a baby in my tummy.. can i just see them already…

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Devastated.

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The greatest loss of a human being can experience is the loss of a child. It doesn’t just change you, it demolishes you.

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Just watched a video: 5 signs of feeling burnout. Nailed all of them.

I really need help but I don’t know where else to go…

Like whenever I tried to rely on my husband, he always cornered me for being stupid leaving my old job, or that I’m just ungrateful, or worst “you always complaining”.

I really don’t know how to fix this thing…

I’m thinking about suicide all the time now.

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Here we go again…. Anxiety attacks

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I don’t want to experience a slow death.

I want it to be instantaneous, so I don’t have to say good bye to everyone, and most importantly - I won’t be a burden to anyone. You just die, that’s it, end of story.

So if I got a V V sick - cancer for instance, I don’t know if this possible, but I will just tell the Doctor that I will not trying to survive and their gonna waste their time for treating me like shit.

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I kept having a problem around my internal organs… like I have no clue on what went wrong with my body that I need to change to.

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I should really insurance myself and invest more, you know just in case…

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Went to ER for urinary tract infections. Hubby said it wasn’t really important because it’s only UTIs, nothing more. I’m like “fuck are u kidding me” like I was in a huge pain, there were a fuckin blood in my urine and he said it’s nothing important???

So what’s important really means now? Me in a comma??

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Yeah of course I prayed, 5 times a day. But that doesn’t change anything… like my mind is still out there, searching for a perfect way to die - while praying to be saved in dunya and akhirah..

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Don’t tell anyone what you’re doing until it’s done.

That’s definitely my mantra

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The truth is, I envy Harry Potter. Even when his parents dead, his relatives (parents friends especially), teachers, friends are still there for him!

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And oh, just so you know. I’m feeling unwanted here. Right after I submitted my resignation letter, Boldemort - who happens to be my top boss + enemy, his reaction was just: “oh so she wanted to resign, please find another employee to replace her!”

So if you asked me, did I regret my decision to leave this toxic company? Nope! This is probably the best decision ever.