not a fashion statement

Hi, I'm Ellie. 23 years old. Still a little fucked up. This is just my place to let some of the poison out. This is my secret.

[nightmaresandtears]

I need to last a day without food. I need to prove to myself I have some form of self control. One of my best friends just dropped another dress size and is now smaller than me. No.

[anorexicbitchacho]

Nobody fucks the fat girl.

[skeletal-flower]

i will be skinny

i can do it. i have done it before, and i can do it again. i must control myself. i must control my food and i must control my weight. i am strong.

[xoee]

Bulimia Perk #9265! 🌞

Not being able to eat anything without automatically imagining what it’s going to taste like in vomit form

[tinyladysweets]

do you ever look in the mirror and forget how fat you actually are :/

[xo-fat-xo-blog]

the only thing that keeps me going is remembering how fat I am

[youdonthearaword]

[nightmaresandtears]

When I was 11, my father asked if my thighs had always touched, with a disapproving tone and a frown on his face.

I still don't have that thigh gap I need to be perfect.

[nightmaresandtears]

i have had disordered eating for more than half of my life.

That's so weird to think about. Imagine if hating myself weren't normal. What a novel idea.

[syd4ie-deactivated20220925]

Bulimia isn’t a long haired pretty girl bending over a toilet with a tragically beautiful face on. It’s a puffed miserable face with vomit dripping from it’s chin and a fucking nose bleed. Anorexia isn’t a slim figure shyly refusing a cupcake. It’s hair growing over your freezing malnourished body. Depression isn’t a model with running mascara staring into the sunset. It’s staring at the fucking ceiling at 4 in the morning with burning eyes because you can’t even find the motivation to close them. Self harm isn’t lovely boys kissing your arms telling you you’re still beautiful. It’s nasty fucking scars that will be there forever and showers that sting. Panic attacks aren’t burying your face into your lovers chest and them telling you everything will be okay. It’s feeling out of control and like oxygen has been taken from you. Mental illnesses aren’t beautiful. They don’t make you special and don’t make people suddenly care about you. They’re monsters that destroy lives. So stop taking them lightly and promoting them to impressionable teenagers on the damn internet.

[4everblueroses]

THIS!

[noblood-nofoul-deactivated20170]

❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

[thin-skinny-thin-skinny-thin]

[nightmaresandtears]

Had sex with a guy for the first time today.

Part of me wanted to get laid, part of me thought why not, and part of me was sick of being a virgin. Not the best reasons, but not the worst. He lasted three minutes. It was so boring and bad. What a waste of a night.

[emptiness-within]

[breathtakingdestruction]

[the-skinny-and-beautiful]

But you don’t look like you have an eating disorder.

Via the-skinny-and-beautiful (via the-skinny-and-beautiful)

[whispers-of-the-rain]

You might have lost the battle, but you still have a chance to win the war. Don’t give up now.

[novembermord]