when life throws you shit. @niniathespace - Tumblr Blog

after sunset, Sunday.

Having a bad day doesn’t mean your entire day is bad, it can be only some part of the day that really ruin your day. As for me, its today. It can be everyday, but I always look at something good that happened that day to be okay again. Keep on reminding myself, its okay, you did great for everyday because we really did great everyday, we just don’t see it but all the bad things covered your eyes.

My days could go well, my days could be bad, my days could be nothing but I’m proud to always wake up and get through the day, Even it takes awhile to start your day, even it takes 15 minutes crying to feel okay, even it takes 2 hours of sleep to feel energetic again.

Treat yourself twice a week, it doesn’t have to expensive or necessarily a ‘thing’, or wrapped with ribbons. It could be your favorite drinks from Starbucks, or your fav food at certain places. It is enough to make you feel happy. You can’t always expect people do something for you, you must do it for yourself. I just treated myself with my fav iced chocolate yesterday and I feel blessed right away. Blessings for life does comes from the little things. Don’t always look for bigger things, appreciate the little things.

x

#randomsunday

dryyoureyes-startbelieving

healthforgrace

Charcoal mask, shirtless.

Us against the world, playing.

Another lonely night, lonely because I pushed people away, only with cats wondering how I have burdened the one that I love, the one who always with me during my breakdowns, random crying at 3AM, my laughing gas. The feel of not wanting to talk to anyone sucks, because you are actually lonely, but you just don’t want to give the sad energy that is coming from you to other people.

The only thing that keeping me sane is the thought of all of this will go away and I will be fine again. This time I was just a little unlucky, where I couldn’t find my rainbow after the rain. It is only rain... rain.. and some more rain. But it is okay. I will get through this no matter what.

Always trust in His’s plan, and you will be fine.

x

naturaekos

What would come, would come…and you would have to meet it, when it did.

(via amargedom)

Clocking to the midnight.

As my little fingers, make its way to the keyboard typing every little words without knowing where to begin since there are many things in this little mind wanting to express and to be understood by the people around her.

One word, hard.

Life is hard, to wake up is hard, to get through the day is hard, to ignore the feelings is hard, to keep this mouth shut from screaming is hard, to think there is a better life in the near future is hard, to explain is hard, to write is hard, to talk is hard, to go to bed is hard. But, in the end, I still get through the day. Same day, same shit, with different plot twist, at the beginning of the day, middle of the day or at the end of the day.

I know something is wrong, when not to be in this world seems so much better than to be existed or to be noticed. I know its not me, when sleeping is so much better than waking up. I know its weird, when being alone is what I’m looking forward to, than to be with family or people I loved.

I hope all of this is just temporary before it starts losing myself completely.

x

#surviving

cwote

midnight, rainy days.

I have left so many memories and words here without knowing I will ever come back and look back the past. However, I’m glad to be back here. I realize how much things have changed in the past few years.

I was so much better now compared years ago, I love myself more, and appreciate myself even better. I used to doubt everything and everyone. I never believe I will ever be loved the way I suppose to. I never knew how does it feels like to be in a healthy relationship, get the right treatment from your loved ones, to sleep in peace every night and waking up with new hopes. But now, I do.

Well, not everything my life is perfect. There are still flaws here and there. Ups and downs. Tears, anxiety and feeling depressed from time to time. But at least, I did not let myself to be in the wrong hands anymore. I did not let myself settling for less. I did not let myself receive anything less than I deserve. I did not fight for something that is not worth it. I did not invest my time or feelings to someone who does not appreciate me for the way I am.

It was not easy, but it is not impossible. Even it took awhile for me to get there, but it is all worth it. To trust again, to love again, to have hopes again. Without the pain I have been through in the past, I would not be who I am today. I would probably still clueless how cruel the world can be, and how people can change overnight, and I might still have not realize what is right for me and whats not. Therefore, I am glad for everything. The bad, and the good.

melisica

Deni Pesto

hatin

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”

— Lao Tzu - (hatin)

intothegreatunknown

deepthoughtsvibes-deactivated20

We were on the phone and you asked me why I sound so sad. I told you I’m not sad and tried to change the topic. But deep down I didn‘t want to change the topic in fact I wanted you to ask what‘s wrong and if I want to talk and wanted to hear that you are here for me but you didn‘t. I pretended I was okay when I was not and you kept believing me.

(-deepthoughtsvibes)