I want to spend time with her again, before was different, now I don't feel the gnawing resentment of her having moved on. Instead I think of her and her partner and I'm happy for her. Genuinely happy. Anyone in my shoes would lose integrity to say they were completely free from envy, but all feelings are subdued by the knowledge that someone else can now feel the same as I once felt because of her. It saddens me slightly that I don't know the partner, that we don't talk. Conventional wisdom tells this type of relationship should be weird but to converse with someone who knows and has felt exactly what you have known and have felt seems so desirable and genuine. But I do what to spend time with her, we were two carved from the same tree at one point and I know there is still so much more we can learn from each other. It would seem a tragedy to look back on life and see our most vivid memories being of when we were young and idealistic.
