alkistis

cinematography in the dark Icelandic winter

[noapenonyr]

Alkistis 2017 Showreel

[noapenonyr]

only thing that’s mine here is my perception of it

Athens.

The Noise

The fake hair

The violence

The lights

The excessive make up

The blinding sun with the wind and exhaust gas spreading like cancer all over

The mobile phones

The rudeness

The questions

The looks

The merchants of furniture, electronics, clothes

All IS A BARGAIN

No one smiles

No one really cares

For we’ve been taught that the presence for a Greek comes when they have money to spend on more coffees or fake hair and eye lashes.

designers clothes and sparkly snickers.

I am Greek and this is my country. I know the people have golden hearts and as bright minds as our sun.

Whatever happened to them?

What have I missed?

All I see is a city full of merchants 

and the artists have disappeared

 in the only thing still left half alive in the capital, the nightlife.

The clubbing

The release of it all.

Lost faces in the smoke and the alcohol.

The bass trembles and the hearts are shaking.

Dancing away.

Tomorrow will be a resting day. Tomorrow will be weekend again.

Just like yesterday or the day before and the one before that.

[noapenonyr]

there is a house at the end of the street

someone.   

only one calls it home.

for everyone else it is just the house at the edge of town

myself 

first time I walked in front of it,

I took a photo not a particularly good one 

you couldn't even see its view of the lake, 

-and this house is built just in front of it.

so like this, small and not particularly interesting as I felt in front of it

I was invited in 

to meet the one person who called it home 

she told me a story and I made a film of it

I was interested in her story and more so 

in what she had to teach me 

for she seemed a wise woman 

she could hear the voice of the mountains and taught me to do the same

she is my age and I am her age 

sometimes we switch just for fun 

I showed her my small self and I was surprised to see 

how she found my big self- For she is a wise woman.

I love the wild side of life 

I m no good at carrying people.

the charming and sometimes harsh present is where I belong 

and so finding a friend and a home was the most unexpected 

expectation I never knew I had.

for sometimes friendship like any relationship has obligations I m not cut out 

for- but once you meet a woman like her you know you have found a friend. 

and you know this because there will be no obligations no weights 

to drag you down 

it will be simple 

coexistence and companionship

[noapenonyr]

a frozen land for a frozen heart

do you ever stop and listen to your heartbeat

or do you only listen to the loud silence it makes when it stops beating

[noapenonyr]

for the perfectly sharp, digital and automated human

the perfection and sharpness of a digital automatic lens- 

for the perfectly sharp, digital and automated human

we, SOMETIMES, are stuck in the definitions.

we, MIGHT, forget about the undefined or the unspeakable-

 the free form of a scene and its content

but if we think about it, REALLY, can’t a gesture of a hand, 

a crossing of the legs be a portrait of someone? 

it makes me wonder

can the sharpness or the 

thousand-times-done-before 

medium portrait framing

bring death to this romanticized

viewpoint my eyes see?  

killing the soul of letting the moment to be felt

because of the “standard” coverage.

life was not meant to be captured in a straight forward way, 

we can’t comprehend it in a straight forward way 

anyway

yes a portrait can be sharp with infinite colors, contrasts or be perfectly exposed but do we then forget that these are just some tools and not the point? tools to translate the character of the photo. a character that is neither right or wrong, so how can exposure, focus, color and tones be?

have we lost the meaning of the photographic medium

- especially in the cinema- 

by trying to take the most striking perfect photo 

or is there no audience for that anymore? 

[noapenonyr]

When rainy and miserable go floral ;) morning!!!

[noapenonyr]

I am not defined by my country I am not defined by my work I am not defined as an immigrant I am not accepting any type of high class slavery I am not defined as a traveller I am not defined by the money in my bank account and I will not consider myself successful for having a job just because there are not many jobs out there at point in time. I am restless and I will stay that way until the end. I know what matters and none of it is in all those definitions by societies in need of victims that believe in categories, status and wealth. I am not going to change my journey in life For the banks, the institutions and their laws. Fuck them. I suggest you do the same. the most valuable thing we carry in this life is our souls - and I m not selling mine. I am 27 and my experience in life is still telling me to never stop pushing against the path laid out for masses, it tells me so since I was 14. so I know it is a pure unfiltered need and the humanity in me preserved it until today in all the highs and lows and the the stereotypes I had to fight, lost and won. I know there are more people out there like me and I am lucky enough to know some of you already. stay wild friends and do not get comfortable in the illusions of a system, a job, an institution. no compromise.

[noapenonyr]

Only love and mixed feelings

there are situations which on their own contribute to what we are going to feel about people around us. there are moments of connection that even the strangest and the most distant of the people to us, our personalities and inner worlds find a place to exist and challenge us to see a different perception of what life is, and where we think we want to go next. 

the funny thing is that these moments and those situations can only happen when you let yourself into the unknown. 

and to do so we re often coming from rather extreme backgrounds. 

with an unbalanced plan that is reacting from within. the deepest levels of our existence, our emotional and psychological unexplored sides of ourselves that want to be discovered and understood. 

when all these different variables fall into place the strings of faith and destiny if there is such thing are shattered and manipulated by the tiny force of energy we have as beings -in comparison to the universe. 

the place we end up is unaffected by time and the way we perceive time.the relationships that are formed have as much love, uncertainty and pain as we can handle. 

we have let someone see us when we were not ready to be seen. we have let someone affect us when we were trying to stay true to our needs and wants. 

Then time flies, 

and we fly our separate ways 

until we meet again.

and then all that is left is love...

in all its majesty, with no means of expression that are safe in any way. 

we realize we re out of our bubbles for good. 

Unprotected and fearless. 

because we know all that matters is to live and pursue the unknown towards the growth of our hearts with endless love and endless pain.

sweet familiar stings to our chests! 

[noapenonyr]

the return

the longest the journey the more time to process 

and understand where I was and what I m leaving behind.

there is so much comfort in this traveling "dead" time, 

just sitting with my thoughts while my body is moving on to a new destination.

at first I have to remember 

to hold my chin up every time I feel the sting of goodbye coming.

I focus on what I ve lived,  how it has changed me instead 

and try to stay there as long as I can.

every experience is different 

every person is different 

every place...

and somehow they re all one. 

I am what connects them all.

somehow its my duty to find a place for all of it 

let them live on through me.

making my heart grow, fill it with moments and connections that unite those moments as one; a fortress within me

 that gets me stronger, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. and then i can give it all back to the people i ll meet. wherever that’ll be!

looking at the bigger picture of what I have learned and how I m planning to move on I realize that no matter how easy it seems after I have conquered something the way to it is often isolating and lonely.

To stand by my own beliefs and ethics

To chose and not let myself be chosen

To respect what i love, not loving it selfishly

To let myself start anew when the circumstances are changing 

- even when I have found comfort and stability in my everyday tasks.

I m still exploring, still growing, still learning 

but those qualities were and always will be traveling with me.

[noapenonyr]

What does a skammdegi do after skammdegi?

the rain is melting the snow, somehow a circle is complete

as this was the first observation that made me start this blog. 

i still love the sound of the rain on the ice,

but this time it matters differently to me.

the igloo is getting smaller

the rain is making it lower I barely fit in it anymore 

It ll keep getting small until it ll be all a pile of snow again. 

back to the form nature wants things to be.

i respect that. i look even further ahead in time,i don't want to see the moment when the igloo turns into snow. i know it ll happen i jut don't want to experience that one moment 

you see... my problem is that I know it is going to happen 

and I know it is going to hurt.

I don't like the predictability of this situation.

I value the unexpected moments 

that just happen 

connections are effortlessly made 

and they can't be predicted, anticipated or controlled. 

they just happen and that's where I find myself to be the last few months, I m fully ready as a skammdegi would be -for the unexpected, the new. 

but knowing that on Friday at a certain time my now full of love heart we ll hurt is no good. 

 It's an experience I want to miss. 

an experience that will not be pure it ll be mixed up with everything I have managed to escape: Trying to control feelings Predict situations Make them feel less. 

saying goodbye is that sort of situation.

and no matter how successful or unsuccessful I am to express in that moment of goodbye there is always the same taste. 

 It doesn't start straight away, it tends to happen a few minutes later, when the brain catches up with my body that is leaving. traveling away.moving on

and there's a sting - like a bird is chipping a tiny bit of my heart 

then the impact of that sting starts to spread out to the body, making me kind of paralyzed of my feelings. this has more of a silenced deep base sound like an earthquake is about to start. 

. 

[noapenonyr]

vow of silence

After two months in Ólafsfjörður 

a few days in silence to reflect back on this experience are in order.  

Today I have been trying to speak and say what I feel about my stay here 

trying to come up with a structure to present it all in a way 

that represents me the closest.

I find that words fail me to do so. 

I was always better at communicating in a visual way.

It may be because my father always asked me to explain what I see- being blind himself- the pressure was too much but somehow I tried and tried harder each time to make him understand what I see. The words kept failing me, but my father seemed happy.

I then realized he was never only following my words. It was my voice, the colors of my emotions about what I was seeing and my desire to translate it all for him.

That is my focus point, to convey emotions, ideas, thoughts. 

Not information or a fictional narrative to create illusions to my show’s visitors.

I have way more respect for the audience here than that.

 Therefore I have decided to take a vow of silence for the next few days.

Focus on finding the visuals and use my voice selectively only to make recordings for my exhibition. 

Staying in the bubble of self exploration and clarity 

this place has offered me a little longer.

That is until 6pm on Friday the 19th right before my solo exhibition 

ready for skammdegi is on where I ll have my voice back.

peace and love

AL

[noapenonyr]

57 days in Olafsfjörður - why I am here.

In five days I ll be in the town of Olafsfjörður for two months straight, without having left those mountains at all. 

Olafsfjörður is a town without a cafe -at least not one that opens regularly. 

It does have a college, a library, a swimming pool, a gym and a gas station.

 I walked to the tunnel that gets you out of Olaf for a couple of times now. I just wondered around the entrance. But didn't leave.

I can be stubborn like that. 

Before I come here I thought that the biggest challenge would be not to be able to leave if i wanted to because of the bad weather.

Being surrounded by those mountains, 

there is only one street that gets you out. 

Through the tunnel.

Then I got here and the simple life of this place became what I ‘d end up treasuring the most during my stay. There are no unnecessary options to waste time, and I really did not feel like surrender to any distractions yet.

There's a beautiful landscape to look at every time I leave the house 

And a crazier or more hardcore weather than the Scottish one to keep things interesting. 

The interaction of the weather with this landscape is what really kept my interest as a cinematographer. As a film maker and a person it's the people I have met. To get to know a place is to get to know its people and how they have shaped up their lives and the community they live in. I dId so by stepping willingly out of my comfort zone, let myself get accepted by the new.

I isolated myself as much as possible from anything that came with me from the other places i ve lived, forgot about a few old habits and adjusted to what life is here.

I tested my limits to see how the survival instinct kicks in when you put yourself Into an unknown and sometimes dangerous environment.

that is why i have the roughest hands i ve ever had. 

I felt I had to keep my body and mind healthy without taking any vitamins by going to the gym and the swimming pool almost every day. I know many people are suggesting to take supplements as the food for a vegetarian here is quite limited, however it is just for three months, I think ll avoid depression using my mind and my heart not pills. it has got me that far...

Without hurting myself too much.

Here -at this swimming pool and the gym 

the getting ready for skammdegi project started. 

 What's wrong with being confident Jamie?! 

http://gph.is/1nVToCU

Getting ready for skammdegi is a joke that my collaborator and friend Jamie started while singing the bootylicious song by destiny’s child replacing the lyrics to: I don't think you're ready for skammdegi.

Skammdegi means dark winter and it is the reason why i m here in Iceland the last couple of months (since early December) documenting that. The artist residency I am part of is called Skammdegi and is oranised by Listhus.

Next Friday (19th of February) I ll be having my solo exhibition 

showing and sharing thoughts and ideas with all the lovely people i have met 

here.

I could not be more excited to show them what i saw through our interaction and how i found myself and kept rediscovering me in Olafsfjörður every single day i ve spent here.

READY FOR SKAMMDEGI. 

many many thanks to Jamie Scott Gordon and Alice Liu for the inspiration they were to the title of my exhibition!

[noapenonyr]

ALKISTIS IS READY FOR SKAMMDEGI 

SOLO EXHIBITION 

19 February at 20:00

Listhus Artspace

Aegisgata 10, 

625 Ólafsfjörður, Iceland

[noapenonyr]

words & actions

when I start to write I don't think

what my topic is 

who I m writing for 

when I ll finish it

I just write. like i do just now.

I start with one word 

am I feeling like this word?

-sometimes I do but others i don’t

if I don't I ll try and write a sentence 

the chances of feeling closer to something I describe in more words are more- even if each one of those words I m using are not exactly how I feel- 

much like some of our actions in life. they cant all be us. 

we re seeking for us in them and vice versa.

sometimes we make the tiniest of gestures and it shows precisely what we feel- but there are times when my actions are not very linked to my emotions. 

a friend once told me 

 we are not our actions 

I don't think I ever understood it, but it felt right somehow -probably because it was the opposite of the obvious-. 

I think I understand now.

life is often too complex I sometimes need a sentence

a bigger image of my actions to try and find my path, 

where I stand 

what I want to write about. 

I m not just my actions I m not just my words I m also sentences sometimes formed by grammar and spelling mistakes. wrong words. the wrong tone. 

full stops without capital letters after them.

[noapenonyr]

Emotion and Perception can’t be taught.

Krzysztof Kieślowski

[noapenonyr]

note to self

the one who risks 

is the one who falls the hardest too.

there are 

no safety nets 

no back up plans 

there are conscious choices made randomly in time with no warning to think it over and come up with the 'right' answer about what to do. 

you just have to DO 

to win is not the aim

nor a reward 

and 

to lose is to face all consequences 

pick up whatever pieces still remind you of you 

and re-assemble or reinvent  yourself

there is no surrender 

and there are no heroes

there are no taking breaks from life or hiding away from it. 

We don't need 

We want

what we want is what we need. 

how we get it is up to us

our power is in our bodies and minds , 

and this power is energy that pulls in or pushes others miles away from us. 

we stay unprotected to those that are pulled in, 

what's the point in covering up anyway? 

that's not our method. There is no method. 

There should not be any method among people. 

Then we fall. 

we fall hard and endlessly. 

but even then

Don't come up with a method to stay safe for the next time  

Don't even try and hide what has happened to you. 

Step out broken as you are don't mask it. 

you ll lose your energy, 

you body and mind will give up on you 

and if they do you d be better off dead than a half alive human. 

[noapenonyr]

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