@nobodyhorse - Tumblr Blog

i’d really appreciate it if you people would stop dying right before i can execute my plots & schemes

#nearly went on adriles with this one but the schemes is too fitting for odysseus #even if objectively that is what was happening with books 9-18 #a lot of people suddenly following this account. please note this is not nearly as active as adriles #i’m not often over here

children should learn The Art of War basically asap aand fix the state of aegean trade routes by obliterating a hittite city

#shout out wilusa #anyways how yall doing i havent used this account in forever

many reports coming in if you die a warriors death you go to a different part of the underworld where you can just wrestle and race chariots for eternity . apparently it also sucks

#achilles #book 11 #much to think about with elysium in the odyssey though #meant to be a place of perfect happiness but achilles truly detests it #and again it is realizing worldly glory is fleeting #but also specifically what he says about mindlessness. it is rather brief but it is really interesting #and you can obviously read into that in terms of the iliad too as he conflates it in the odyssey with the ability to return home #he dies in book 18 the minute he gives into fate #it is just a long way to the grave #greatest hits

if your crew wont tie you to your ship’s mast so you might hear the sirens’ fabled but deadly songs you might want to sit them down and ask them why they hate you so much

#book 12 #the sirens

20 years ago if you wanted to marry the wife of a powerful danaan king you would have to go out and abduct her with the aid of the gods, now everyone just saunters into your palace and thinks they have a chance with her.

#the suitors #penelope #helen #forgot about this account until people started liking that one post honestly #how yall doin #the iliad #book 1

thinking of committing a few war crimes under the cover of night, just to see how it goes.

#the iliad #always forget i also have this account sorry

a cool prank is to convince someone to join the Danaan Forces in troy and watch them suffer incredible grief & die terribly in pursuit of honor

#this is about #achilles #specifically. but really applicable to a ton so #the iliad

My ideas to infiltrate a fortified city??? thought youd never ask. gonna have to go with "Be pathetic in a bush" and "Horse"

#book 6 #book 7 #book 8

apologies from my tardy ass, i was trapped aboard a flimsy raft traveling across the treacherous aegean sea

#book 17 #favorite

Returning once more to the treacherous sea. Every body feels bad for the guy who’s been trapped at sea for a decade. I’ll be the king of story tellers. I’ll be the epic hero man. I’ll be immortalized forever

things have only gotten worse since i slighted the gods again

to be honest it's less of me entering the underworld and more of me standing at the precipice of it, but i did meet a lot of cool and tragic spirits over there.

#book 11

"you have to enter the realm of hades and speak with the theban seer tiresias before you can return home" is a good thing to say if you want to trick a people into entering the realm of hades.

#book 10 #circe #tiresias

did you notice what i did with my whole look, i broke a leafy branch from a thicket to cover myself and my hair is all fucked from being tossed about at sea for days.

#book 5 #book 6

i put years of hard work into crafting devious strategies to allow the danaan troops to finally raze the city of troy & now everyone’s like “oh deception is not an honorable battle strategy”, “war crimes are bad” fuck off

#ik this is a dril tweet. but like. come on it fits odysseus more than it ever did achilles #plus i run both accounts like who is going to stop me. im mad with power

i may have created a foolproof strategy to gain entry to the hallowed heights of troy but that doesnt mean i have a fool proof plan to get out of every obstacle i encounter ever

put me in the trojan encampment i will nobly slaughter the enemy warriors in their sleep. i will take their horses and Athena’s protections

#the iliad #athena

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